The Color of Jade (Jade Series Book 1) (18 page)

I wanted to remember him in faded jeans with his grass stained knees and a tee shirt. With his cheeks smudged with dirt from our less than clean endeavors throughout the day on the farm. I had to fight to keep that memory. I couldn’t even see his face in my mind anymore without looking at a picture, and the harder I tried the blurrier his image got. The first image that came to mind whenever someone mentioned him was how he looked in the casket.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up Zach.  I’m sure it was hard for you,” Gage said. He pulled me from my thoughts as I turned suddenly to look at him. I blinked and the glassiness in my eyes faded instantly as a dull ache formed behind them.

“It’s okay, he was my friend. It just seems weird to talk about him because I never did really, not even to Trey. He wouldn’t talk about it.”

My mind whirled as I tried to muddle through the fog in my mind, back to where I was. Here, in a small cabin in the middle of nowhere, with Gage, Zach’s cousin, my brothers’ friend. It all seemed strange for some reason, complicated.

My body shivered and I pulled the blanket around my shoulders but I barely recognized the cold. Gage stood. The hollowed sounds of his worn boots against the old wooden floor as he walked over to the stove echoed amongst the foundation of the cabin. He put a couple logs on the fire as he noticed my chill then he moved in front of me with his eyes fixed on mine. With low rafters of the roof just inches above his head, he rested his hands against it. The swell of his biceps drew in my gaze then shifted to the black and silver pendant that dangled sending me into a mesmerizing trance as I watched it.

“Jade…” His voice, distant trailed off. I looked at him.

Suddenly, his presence filled the tiny cabin and surrounded me. Gage was here, not Zach, and the intense blueness of his eyes searched mine deeply for some kind of resolution. His bronze skin, darkened in the hues of the dim lantern light as the slight slope of his shoulders and the curvature of his chest cut down to his contoured waist, outlined by the tightness of his tee shirt. The way he spoke with confidence, the way he curled his lip slightly when he smiled, the sincerity in his eyes, and the movement of his body as he walked, encouraged me.  His fiercely protective but chivalrous mannerisms’ spoke to me in a way that rendered me speechless and burned warmth through me like nothing else I’d known, hotter than the tangible fire in front of me.

I’d watched him, and our eyes had met many times, at school, passing my house and at Marge’s and now here at the cabin. I felt drawn to him and now we were here together, alone, with nothing to distract us. Not a crowded hallway at school, not Kane or Trey, not Damian or some stupid assembly full of Militia, not a memory of an old friend or life’s interruptions and I couldn’t help but wonder if he had felt drawn to me too.

“So… What you’re saying is… I’m not just Kane’s little sister to you?” I wasn't sure where it came from, but dared to ask the question. My eyelids grew heavy as my heartbeat quickened and stole my breath. I bit at my bottom lip as I waited for what his answer might be.

“No,” Gage said as relief settled in his eyes. His gaze dropped to my lips and lingered for a moment, then he looked up as a smile tugged softly at the corners of his, “you’re not just Kane’s little sister. Not to me.”

“Oh…”

Why was it so hard for me to believe that this gorgeous guy in front of me, could like someone as plain as me? My inexperience was obvious. I'd never sat in this position before and I had no idea what to do next.

A hushed silence filled the air between us as I tried to absorb what he said. A whirlwind of words in my tangled mind, mingled with the fragrant scent of chamomile and mint along with its dizzying effects dulled the pounding in my head. He said it, he more than liked me, I think. I glanced at the cup in my hand, almost empty. Most likely the reason why my mind suddenly felt stuck in a fog.

“I feel funny,” I said, as I glanced up at Gage and handed him the cup. My hand trembled and my arm felt weighted as a wave of warmth moved through me. He let his hands drop from the rafters. His fingers brushed against mine as he took the cup. He chuckled under his breath as I gave him a scowl through hooded eyes and sank into the bedding. “Did you give me tea on purpose?”

“Did you have a headache?” He asked as he averted my question.

“Yeah…”

“Do you still?”

“It’s going away,” I said, my words thick in my mouth as I grew tired.

“You need to rest your mind.”

“I don’t want to,” I paused, as I closed my heavy eyes, unable to hold them open any longer. I rubbed at my temples in an attempt to draw my fading headache away. “I like talking to you.”

I felt the bed shift under his weight as he moved next to me, the warmth of his body close. He pulled my hand away from my head and I let it fall as he resumed massaging my temples.

“So, where did you learn to ride like that?” He asked, his voice low and husky, soft in my ear. Before I could answer, he spoke again. “I watched you ride every day when I walked by your house.”

“I know,” I said, I pulled my eyes open briefly.

“You know?”

“Yeah, I saw you... I guess you weren’t the only one watching.” I smiled, as a pleased look crossed his face and he smiled back. I let my eyes close as I relaxed under his touch, entranced by the sounds of his steady breaths. I felt myself fade into the depths of sleep, his voice distant and faint like a dream, maybe it was a dream. A dream I didn’t mind getting lost in.

“Sleep beautiful…”

***

The hum of the bowstring vibrated through the cool mountain air as Gage released the arrow. His ability to shoot a bow and his sharp accuracy far better than he led on as he struck the bulls-eye or near it every time.

He handed me the bow and another arrow, his expression modest as he encouraged me to take it, I was glad he didn’t rub it in. He chuckled under his breath as I huffed out of frustration and took it slowly. I chided myself about teasing him earlier, about
me
teaching
him
how to shoot a bow. I’d never shot a bow in my life and it became apparent after my first few shots, the last of which strayed far from the target, completely missing the tree.

“If we were shooting clay pigeons…” I let my words trail off as I pulled the bow up to my cheek. I didn’t want to make an excuse but was irritated with myself that I couldn’t shoot a bow as well as I could shoot a gun.

“Come here, I’ll show you,” he said, his arms folded as he leaned against a tree watching me. I walked towards him as he stood upright and moved behind me. His arms surrounded me and he positioned my hands as he put his over mine. I pulled the string tight and he moved my finger with his to support the arrow.

“Loosen your hold on the string and straighten your arm,” he said as he positioned my arm with my hand and the string closer to my cheek. “Smooth release… don’t jerk the string.”

“Okay…”

I aimed just above the target and let the string slip though my fingers. The arrow cut through the air and carved itself into the center of the bulls-eye. The string hummed as it whipped back and forth releasing the tension.

“Just like that,” he said, softly in my ear, his voice low and husky. Chills rose up my spine and into my hair with his warm breath on the back of my neck.

His arms fell slowly to my waist, his hands rested feather light on my hips. My breath caught. I still held the bow as I lowered my arms with his close. I turned my head slightly back, his lips framed with the roughness of his whiskers, next to my cheek. I looked up into his eyes. An intense feeling rushed through me as goose bumps pinpricked my flesh and butterflies rose in my stomach. It wasn’t nerves I felt, no, he didn’t make me nervous though my heart pounded violently. It was something more, much stronger, new.  I smiled apprehensively and he stepped back after he reluctantly let his hands fall. My hips felt cold from the sudden absence of his touch.

“Now try it without me,” he said. With a slight curl of his lip, he offered a grin and handed me another arrow.

My arms felt like Jell-O as I lifted the bow up and aimed the arrow at the target again. The thin wooden arrow felt like it weighed the equivalent of dense river rock. I took a deep breath. He watched me and kept me distracted as I released my breath and sucked air deep into my lungs. Somehow, I steadied my hands as I released the string and let the arrow cut through the air once more. I prayed it hit the target. If the arrow found the tree, I would have been happy since I didn’t think I could hit the broad side of a barn at that moment. I closed my eyes and froze. I couldn’t bring myself to watch and I heard Gage laugh.

“How bad is it?”

“You didn’t see it? What did you close your eyes for?”

“I couldn’t watch.”

“Well look!”

He surrounded me with his arms while he pulled me towards the target. We walked up to the tree and looked at the arrows, not really registering. The two looked like they grew right out of the tree from the exact same place.

“How’d you do that?”

“Beginners luck,” I said proudly.

“I guess.”

“Don’t ask me to do it again, I won’t be able to,” I laughed.

“Oh yeah… I’m going to expect it every time now,” he said with a raise of his eyebrows. I gave him a shy smile, a little embarrassed and he laughed.

“Do you feel up to a hike?”

“Sure… I feel fine.”

“We won’t go far.”

He followed the trail and led the way with me not far behind him. We didn’t say much, both comfortable with the gentle tranquility and quietude between us. When the trail became steep, Gage offered his hand and I gladly took it just for a chance to touch him. The trail narrowed and as I slipped on loose rocks, he quickly pulled me close. My breath caught and I laughed at my clumsiness as my heart fluttered high in my chest like a thousand butterflies trying to escape.

Grey clouds hugged the peaks of the mountains and sent a light shower, barely enough to settle the dust but more than enough to dampen my hair and clothes. The cool drizzle moistened my skin, causing goose bumps to crawl over me from the chill. I looked up at the sky as it stopped briefly, and then started again. It came in heavy drops, faster, sheets of rain, and left nothing in its wake untouched.

I looked at him with his dark hair, black with a slight natural curl that bent at the ends from the moisture. His grey tee shirt increasingly darkened almost black, as tiny tear shaped splotches appeared from the rain. Each one left its own mark. Rapidly trying to connect with another until there were so many, they interlocked into one.

He grabbed my hand and we ran for the shelter of the trees. I laughed when the rain slowed just as we found cover but not before we were completely saturated. His smile grew and he laughed with me. I wiped a wet strand of hair from my face. Beaded drops of rain from his hair ran onto his eyelashes and down onto his cheeks.

His smile faded, he held me in his gaze as if he forced himself to look into my eyes and nothing else. His jaw clenched tight and the longing I saw in his eyes sent a shiver through my body. I looked down at my shirt only to see it just as wet as his and myself, apparently cold. I crossed my arms in front of me and rubbed my goose bumpy limbs with my hands as I tried to draw the obvious coldness from my body. He drew in a deep breath and exhaled quickly as he pulled his eyes off me and shook the water from his hair with his hands.

He glanced at me again as an uncontainable smile curled at the corner of his lip. His eyebrows lifted and he pursed his lips together in a failed attempt to force away his smile.  “I’m sorry,” he chuckled, unable to contain his amuse, he moved closer and reached for my arms. “You cold?”

I looked at him as I shivered, dripping wet as the cold puckered my skin. “Yeah…” Heat radiated from his hands, which moved in slow, deliberate motion over my arms, warming me as forced friction pulled the chill away. He took a step in as he pulled me closer, erasing the space between us. My breath caught. His strong but gentle grasp on my arms sent a surge of sensationalized warmth through me that touched every inch of my body. I didn’t dare turn away from his intoxicating hold for fear he would disappear right before me. My breaths quickened with my heart as I craved to feel his lips. I recognized a longing in his soft blue eyes as he searched mine with anticipation.

The sudden howl of a coyote pulled me from my dazed state and I jumped, startled. The desire in Gage's eyes shifted quickly to defense and I looked behind me as he looked past. I couldn’t see anything, everything blended, everything looked grey and I felt slightly tense.

“Maybe we should get back,” he said calmly, with a hint of worry in his voice. I looked at him as disappointment grew inside of me. Tormented by the smoldering rush he gave me with no means of release. An all-knowing smile tugged at his lips, his eyes lit with the remnants of an unsatisfied need of his own.

I walked outside and found Gage by the stream. The morning, warm already and the sun bright. He turned around when he heard me and gave me his smile that I loved so much. Warmth surged through me and I smiled back.

I remembered the time when I told Kane I would never have a boyfriend.  I laughed a little as I thought about my childhood idea. I hoped he forgot all about our conversation when I was younger. Eleven years old at the time, in sixth grade. I ran faster than any boy in my class. There was only one boy I couldn’t beat at an arm wrestle, and that was Trey, even though I tried, many times. I was such a tomboy then. I liked to do things boys liked to do and I played their games well, well enough to beat most of them.  I was never interested in boys in any other way before, or ever had my eye on one, until now.

“I will never have a boyfriend,” I had said to Kane. I brushed him off as I took arm wrestling pointers and practiced my skills on him. I knew I could never beat him. I just had fun trying. “What boy wants a girl who can run faster than him and beat him in an arm wrestle?”

Kane just laughed at me. “Good, I don’t want to have to beat anyone up. But I think you will have plenty of boys wanting to go out with you, Jade.” He smiled and shook his head as if he seemed to know something I didn’t.

I looked at Gage as he stood before me and had to wonder. Why did I think that these creatures called boys would never outgrow me, that they would stay boys forever? I had to have known then, that someday, I would see them differently. I found it amusing.

To say the least, Gage got my attention, I definitely noticed him. There would be no way I would be able to beat him in an arm wrestle, I would never even want to try. I for sure would never ask him to wrestle me now.  My cheeks flushed with embarrassment just thinking about it. Now I understood why Kane found it so funny. I had no desire to compete against Gage. For him, yes, if I needed to. Against him, no.

“See the steam rising in the meadow down there in the corner?” He asked, as he pointed to the far end of the meadow, pulling me from my thoughts.

“Yeah?”

“Well, I don’t know why I didn’t notice it before but it’s a natural spring. The water is warm, very warm. Want to go for a swim?” He asked, with a grin.

“Really! … I would love to.”

“Let’s go,” he grinned.

The smell of sulfur lingered mildly in the air as we neared the spring. Besides having a natural supply of hot water from somewhere under the earth, there was a small stream through the meadow. It spilled cool water into it constantly, enough to make it nice and warm but not too hot. There were several springs attached to each other. They were small but there was one about the size of a backyard swimming pool. Kane told me once there was some natural hot springs up here he came to often with friends when he was younger and I could picture him up here.

I sat at the edge of the spring and dropped my legs in the warm water then closed my eyes as a light breeze blew my hair back softly off my face. Completely hidden from the trail behind the trees and the tall blades of grass with sweet smelling wildflowers, it was easy to see how we missed this place.

I glanced over at Gage. “I’m glad you found this...” I started to comment when I became completely dumbfounded.  I knew I was in trouble as he stretched to take off his shirt.  He hadn’t taken it off in front of me before now and as I watched him, I completely lost my thoughts.

His chest and back muscles, sinewy and well defined like the ones on his arms, and if I thought he looked good in that grey tee shirt, he looked amazing with it off.  I couldn’t pull my eyes away from his perfectly molded body, chiseled in all the right places that taunted and tormented me.

I suddenly felt nervous and fumbled on my words as he gave me a perplexed look. It wasn’t the first time I’d seen a guy with his shirt off. My brothers’ friends would come over all the time and all of them practically lived bare chested in the summertime. Being around boys and seeing their tanned muscled bodies never had this kind of effect on me. To see Gage now just fueled my feelings that developed for him and turned them into an overwhelming desire that lingered sweetly.

I wondered if he knew how gorgeous he was, capable of sending my heart into an involuntary spasm. I felt defenseless. His smile tormented me. He found my weakness. My stomach flipped. He looked at me as if he saw right through me to my deepest, most intimate thoughts about him. I couldn’t look away.

Gage moved next to me then slipped off the edge of the natural pool into the waist deep water. He swam out further and dove under for a moment. He came back up, beads of water dripped from his body as he shook his hair.

“Come in.”

“Is it deep?”

“Only in the middle and I don’t know how deep it goes. These things can go down for miles. Along the edges, it isn't deep... Can you swim?”

“Of course, I can swim.”

“Oh, sorry, of course you can… Is there anything you can’t do? After yesterday I’m thinking I have Pocahontas here with me,” Gage commented sarcastically as he joked with me. His arms flexed as he posed and I laughed at his interpretation of me with the bow.

I wanted to say I couldn’t talk and stare at him at the same time but decided not to. I looked away, blushing as he waited patiently for my answer. I glanced back as I heard him laugh lightly under his breath at my shyness.

“Um, I don’t know, I’ll have to think about that one.”

I splashed water in his face with my foot as I felt my face flush a crimson red and he quickly grabbed my leg. I shrieked unexpectedly as he pulled me, laughing into the warm water.

I leaned back to wet my hair and closed my eyes. My body floated buoyantly with the waves. I sat up slowly through the resistance of the water and opened my eyes only to see Gage watching me as I ran my fingers through my wet hair.

“Can you swim?” I asked sarcastically, returning his question from earlier. I splashed him with water again.

“I guess I deserved that.”

I smiled at him softly as a trickle of water spilled down my cheek. My eyes I followed him as his overpowering frame moved through the water in front of me. Confident in his demeanor, his eyes held a look of promise and determination. I held my ground, along with my breath as he moved closer and the look in his eyes softened. He grabbed me around my waist and stood with me in the waist deep water. His hands rested in the small of my back with his palms pressed into me. He pulled me closer, nearer to him as the turbulent water swirled around us. It splashed around my waist and made it difficult to hold still which caused him to hold me tighter.

My heart skipped and I realized I held my breath. I anxiously forced myself to breathe as my hands hovered over his contoured chest, nervous to touch him.

“It's okay, I won't bite,” he said with a roguish grin and a husky voice, challenging me to let him take me where he would.

I let my hands rest against the firmness of his chest. My heart flipped and I watched, beside myself, as my fingers grazed lightly over his taut skin and brushed slowly up to his broad muscled shoulders.

Beautiful.

His smile faded slightly, revealing a desire deep inside him.

“I was walking to Marge’s when I heard you and saw Damian. I couldn't get to you fast enough and knew if he got you in that truck… I was afraid I was too late.”

I couldn’t imagine Gage ever being afraid of anything. His beautiful blue eyes held mine in his intoxicating gaze. I felt myself tense and I realized I clutched his shoulders.  He squeezed me tighter. My heart pounded and I felt sure he could feel it since his chest was so close to mine.

“I don't want to lose my chance to tell you how I feel about you, again.”

“How is that?” I almost whispered, barely able to breathe.

With his cheek next to mine, he moved closer. I felt the warmth of his breath. Our lips almost touched as I turned into him. “You drive me crazy.”

My chest caved with each breath as he touched me softly. His hands moved up my back and over my shoulders then gently cupped my cheeks with his hands. His fingers tangled through my wet hair as he pulled me to him. My eyes followed his warm moist lips as he pressed them to mine. Butterflies rose in my stomach from the gentle give and pull of his lips.

His lips brushed ever so slightly against my bottom lip as he pulled at it with a delicate bite. “I guess I should say… I won’t bite hard.”  He smiled and I smiled nervously back as he spoke while his deep soothing tone drew me in.

My mind whirled. From the heat of the swirling water or from his kiss, I didn’t know, maybe from both. Gage seemed so calm and confident and my body absolutely screamed inside.

“I didn’t want to wait another minute,” Gage said, as I watched the words form on his lips while the feel of him still tickled mine, “I’ve wanted to do that for a long time.”

“Why did you wait?”

He didn’t hesitate any longer and his luscious lips found mine again. My lips parted with his, passionate and longing as he deepened the kiss. I let him kiss me, each new delicious kiss, stronger and more powerful than the last. He wrapped his arms around me and ran his hands softly across my back. I felt his warm wet skin as he pressed me into his chest. My body tingled throughout. There wasn’t one inch of me that wasn’t affected by him.

He pulled me with him to the edge of the pool as he sat on a ledge beneath the water. I faced him, straddling his body. With his hands on my hips, he moved me closer. My breath caught as my body stirred inside. I loved the feeling of being so close to him.

“The answer to your question… Why did I wait? You did hit your head hard. I needed to make sure you'd remember.”

“How could I not. I'll never forget…” I said, with my forehead resting gently against his. With our lips inches from each other, a gratifying, blushing grin grew across my cheeks. He touched my cheek. His fingers skimmed the skin under my eye.

“Do I still have a black eye?”

“Yeah… Does it hurt?”

“When I forget it’s there and touch it… Maybe it’s a good thing I can’t see it… I’m embarrassed by how I must look.”

“You're beautiful. Even with a black eye,” Gage said. He kissed my cheek then moved to my eye and kissed it softly.

“No I’m not…”

“Yes you are... I’ve always thought so.”

“Just because you think so, doesn’t mean I am.”

“Yeah, it does.”

“I’m plain…”

“I know what I see. You’re beautiful, Jade,” Gage said, then chuckled under his breath. “You just don’t know it.”

Everything seemed surreal as Gage took me to a new height. A month ago, if someone would have told me I was going to be sitting here with Gage at this moment, and that he held feelings for me, I would have thought they were crazy. But I was here with him, he cared about me, and I knew my feelings for him were real. They were young, but developing all the same. Almost as if those feelings were there all along. I wasn’t sure how deeply he felt for me or where all of this would go, but I liked it so far.

A sudden wave of heat rushed through me. I moved to the side, sat up on the bank and dangled my feet. My thin cotton shirt clung to me. I tried to concentrate on something else, anything besides the heat. I pulled my shirt away from my body and rung out the hot water to no avail.

“Are you okay, you’re looking really pale?”

“I’m dizzy.”

I closed my eyes. I didn’t realize I swayed until Gage grabbed my shoulders and steadied me. I opened my eyes but everything continued to spin. I felt flushed, fuzzy, but cold at the same time and my eyes rolled back as blackness closed in around me. I heard Gage’s voice, faint, distant.

“Jade! Open your eyes... focus on me...”

His muffled tones grew more in tune. I opened my eyes as the dizziness waned. I scooted back onto the nearby blanket under shade of the trees and laid back, my heart pounding. He sat next to me and stroked my forehead. The shade and the breeze cooled me and I slowly felt better.

“Sorry. That was weird. It came on so suddenly.”

“I guess maybe you shouldn’t be in a hot tub for too long after a concussion,” Gage paused concern weaved through his words. “Seems like I’ve heard that somewhere before, now that I think about it... Do you feel okay?”

“I’m getting there.”

The dizziness finally stopped as my body started to tremble. He leaned against a rock and I rested my head against his leg. I closed my eyes as he ran his fingers over my forehead and through my wet hair, bringing out the natural waves.

“Do you want to go back to the cabin?”

“No, I feel okay now. I think I just stayed in too long. I like it here.”

He moved next to me with his body propped up against his elbow and his other arm rested over my belly. I looked up into his eyes, full of worry.

“Gage… Will you do that again?”

“What?”

“Kiss me…”

The worry faded as a smile tugged at the corner of his lips. He leaned in slowly. His eyes followed mine then ever so softly, gently, our lips met again. They caressed, mingled together, and we embraced each other’s touch. My lips parted and his arms tightened around me. An intense tingling surged through me, unable to control a whimper that escaped me, muffled by his lips. His lips learned every inch of mine with ardent intent, and then as if something ripped us apart, he pulled away. With him inches from me, I saw his eyes heated and his breaths jagged.