Authors: Flynn Eire
Tags: #Fiction, #Romance, #Paranormal, #paranormal romance
“Thank you. You gave me a lot to mull over as well,” he muttered as he tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. We sat in comfortable silence for at least twenty miles, lost in our thoughts before he spoke again. “So you’d really bet
anything
if I asked Seattle if he loved me that he’ll say yes? Come up with conditions to taking him back that he’ll accept?”
“If you don’t set one of them to be that he suddenly turns into a witch or brings you the moon in his hand, something he can’t really do, then yeah,” I answered immediately, excited that maybe Seattle could be happy. He’d been through so much, and if he loved Julus half as much as I thought, the man sitting next to me could give him that.
He went quiet again but I figured that was fair since it was a big decision. “Okay, I’ll do it. If you’re wrong, your part of the bet is to give Aurelo a chance to prove to you that what he feels is real.”
“What?” I gasped, my eyes going wide as my heart started to race. “Why would you make that the bet? I want you and Seattle to be happy!”
“As I want you and Aurelo to be,” he assured me, shooting me a sideways look. “I know Aurelo, Chicago. For longer than any of you have. He’s a
good
man and doesn’t have a deceitful bone in his body. That’s why I wanted to talk to you, to advocate for him. We can all be fools and screw up when it comes to relationships but he would never, not in a million years, use someone or be with you when he really wanted Paolo.
“I see the way he looks at you too. I don’t know what happened in the Hummer or what he did exactly but I can tell you that man has given you his heart. He would do
anything
for you and that’s not what a person feels or is willing to do for a person that’s a replacement for what they really want. You might have subconsciously drawn him initially because you resemble Paolo, but nothing more. I am as sure of it as you are of Seattle.”
I bounced that around in my head. “Okay. Let me think on it. I might not need the bet after this talk. I just need some time before I try to look at if I can fix this.”
“That’s all I’m asking,” he said and I could hear the relief in his tone. I understood what Aurelo meant when he had talked about Julus before. The guy was good people. I smiled as I thought of the possibility of calling him my brother-in-law one day.
* * * *
Finally we did crash on the far east outskirts of Kansas City. I’d never been so happy to see a bed in my life. I didn’t even care that we were all sharing two rooms that connected for security reasons. Boston and Aurelo had been worried that since we were all exhausted, we wouldn’t be able to wake as easily if we heard a disturbance, so they didn’t want us all separated, thinking more ears would be better.
Understandable of course, but what shocked me was the hissy fit Aurelo threw when my brothers tried to force him into the other room. Sure they were adjoining and we were leaving the door open, but he
demanded
to be in my room even if he had to sleep in a stupid wooden chair. He wouldn’t leave me if there was possible danger that could come while we rested.
Finally I relented because I was exhausted, we all were, and I now knew Aurelo wasn’t as easygoing as I’d thought when it came to something important to him… Which apparently my safety was.
That didn’t mean I was sleeping in the same bed as him though. But then I thought about him sleeping in the same bed as one of my brothers and practically saw red as I worried I was going to grind my teeth to nubs. So I went to bed completely dressed, way on one side, on top of the covers with an extra blanket wrapped around me, and my back to him.
It seemed he was never far from my mind though because I dreamed of him. It was weird because I felt so rested in the dream like I knew I’d gotten some really good sleep. Maybe even my subconscious knew I’d been out the moment I hit the pillow.
“I love you,” he said in that sleepy, gravelly voice I adored and got me so hot. “Please believe me, my perfect Chicago.”
“I want to,” I moaned as I squirmed under the covers, his naked body rubbing against mine. “I desperately want to believe that I mattered to you. I just hurt too much to think straight.” Couldn’t even my dreams just be happy, happy?
“No, no hurting. I’ll make it all better. I’ll please you so.” I could hear the promise in is voice as his large frame surrounded me.
I glanced up at him as he splayed my thighs wide, licking his lips as he stared down at everything I had exposed to him. “How do I miss you already?”
“What?” He blinked up at me as he fondled my hole, rubbing it with something cold. Not lube, but maybe lotion?
“How do I miss you already?” I repeated. “I’ve known you less than a week. Being separated from you less than a day and us being over hurts me and I miss you. How can that be?”
“Because you love me. We won’t ever be over.” I wasn’t sure who he was trying to convince there but I nodded that I heard him, not in agreement. “I can’t wait. Tell me it’s okay. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“No pain in dreams,” I chuckled. “Take me, Aurelo. At least here we make sense.” He gave me a hesitant smile as if he didn’t like that idea or was confused. Then he slicked up and pushed inside me. I was surprised it did hurt… A lot. I wasn’t as tight as I used to be considering we’d had sex yesterday but what did that matter in a dream?
It was really confusing but then I didn’t want to think about it. It felt so right being in his arms, with him, I’d much rather focus on that. He made love to me, gentle thrusts and soft words as he declared his love for me over and over again. I held on and tried to let it all sink in but even in my dreams my heart wasn’t open to him again.
He drank from me as I climaxed and part of me wanted to cry. It was like I knew somewhere deep inside this was my closure. The dream was my chance to say goodbye and experience this one last time.
“Thank you for giving me a second chance, Chicago,” he panted when we were done, staring down at me as he cupped my cheek.
I licked my lips as my eyes burned. “That’s not what this was, Aurelo. It was goodbye.”
“It sure as fuck didn’t sound like goodbye,” Phoenix bitched with a growl. “For you guys to fuck with two of your brothers in the next bed you must have really needed to make up.”
I sat up and pushed Aurelo off me so fast it actually hurt when his cock yanked out of me. I blinked around the room and down at my groin, the proof of what had happened all over me. “It wasn’t a dream.”
“I don’t think so,” Aurelo whispered and I darted a glance at him. He was doing the same as I was, looking for signs of what the fuck was going on.
“Can you be so tired you don’t know the difference?” I started shaking as fear flushed my system. “Or is someone fucking with us?”
“I’m too old to not know when I’m being screwed with magically,” he assured me. “I think we were just tired and not fully awake. I’m sorry—”
“For making love to me, right, yeah, thanks,” I muttered and jumped out of the bed, racing away from him. He caught me at the bathroom door.
“No,” he snarled as he pushed me inside and closed the door, pinning me to it. “I’m sorry it wasn’t real to both of us except the last thing you said. I’m sorry we thought it was a dream because it was amazing to me. We should make love more often, though really it’s always making love, because I
love
you. But I liked the slow and gentle with you too as much as I like the hard and fast and the kinky fun.”
I swallowed loudly, shaking as he kept my hands over my head. “Good to know but I meant what I said whether it was a dream or not. It was closure, Aurelo. I was saying goodbye and letting you go.”
“No, I won’t accept that.” He shook his head before kissing my neck, smiling against it when I whimpered. “You wouldn’t react to me like that if you were done.”
“Wanting you physically is different than wanting to be with you,” I argued, my voice not sounding as firm as it had earlier.
“And yet you were so determined to make sure I didn’t sleep in the same bed as your brothers. You said you missed me when we thought it was a dream. That means something, Chicago.”
“That I care for you still. Not that we work. You’re not mine, Aurelo. You’re allowed to do what you want,” I whispered, my heart shriveling as the words passed my lips.
He flinched and leaned back, his eyes swirling with pain and anger. “You really mean that? You won’t give me the chance to make this up to you because I didn’t think before I spoke? You’d cast me aside so easily after everything else we’ve shared.”
“You act like I know that’s all this was and I don’t. I don’t know that.”
“So we’re really done?” He let go of my hands and stepped away. “You’re telling me to move on?”
I nodded, unable to even say the words. He narrowed his eyes at me dangerously as I desperately tried not to cry. I’d never ended a relationship before. Gods, this was painful. How did people do this more than once? And after longer than Aurelo and I had been together?
He eyed my face carefully, calculatingly before nodding. “All right, then I think I’ll go see if Milwaukee is up. He’s very attractive and I’ve caught him looking at me, curious as to the pleasure I can bring a partner. I bet we’d have a lot in common.” I turned away as if he had slapped me, shaking as bile rose in my throat.
“My brother would never betray me like that,” I whispered, the tears falling now. “Which is obviously more than I can say about you. I made the right decision!” I slid past him and grabbed a towel, wrapping it around me before curling in a ball on the floor next to the tub. “I said move on. Not move on to someone else and certainly not
my
brother
. See? You couldn’t have loved me ever.” I was sobbing by the end of my ramble.
“Chicago—”
“Get out. Leave me alone. I can’t take any more.” I shook my head. No, I really couldn’t.
“I didn’t mean it. I just wanted to make a point.”
“It’s been made! Now get out,” I screamed. “I wish I never met you!” And then I started to get hysterical. “I want these memories gone.” I was so stupid to have let him in like I did that he could hurt me so badly. Everyone would either leave or use me. I started slamming my fists into something hard but not the tile. “It won’t hurt if I forget.”
“Chicago, you have to stop that,” Aurelo said in a panicked voice, trying to grab my arms. “I didn’t mean it about Milwaukee—”
Anger boiled inside me. I snarled at him, knowing my eyes flared the bright blue of my malamute as my teeth elongated. Gods, was this what it felt like to go feral? Or was I just hysterical after the stress and exhaustion built up to high and he pushed me over the cliff?
“
Seattle
! I need help here,” he bellowed. I saw how wide his eyes were, fear in them so thick I wondered if I could reach out and touch it. I snapped at him and he moved just in time. “I wasn’t serious, baby. I thought if I mentioned one of your brothers, you’d get jealous and stake your claim on me. I’ve seen shifters do it before. It thought it would remind you that you said I was yours.”
“Doesn’t work like that with more submissive pack shifters,” Seattle snarled, suddenly there. “Jesus, why is his head bleeding?”
“He started punching his temples and saying he wants the memories of me gone. That it wouldn’t hurt if he could just forget. I think I broke him.” I lunged at him again, sinking my teeth into his arm this time and taking a chunk when he pulled away. Tears were flowing down his cheeks as I spat it out, giving him an evil smile.
Seattle pinned me down by the shoulders and snarled in my face, snapping towards my neck, and I instantly stopped my aggression, whimpering like a dog who knew he’d been bested.
“You’re not worth having a breakdown over,” Seattle informed Aurelo. “He’s lost his parents, had his whole
world
turned upside down, the world around us is going to shit, we’ve barely slept in days, running for our lives, and from what Phoenix told me, he thought he was dreaming and let you fuck him. I don’t know what else happened besides what I heard but that would be enough for anyone to have a mini breakdown.
“His malamute wants to come out and protect him but they’re not inherently aggressive animals, so passive ones like Chicago get conflicted and don’t really know what to do. Just get out. Get the fuck out while I fix this.”
“I won’t leave him. I have to help him and fix this. I don’t want Milwaukee. I just wanted to show him he cared enough to be jealous. I have to stay and help.”
“Haven’t you done enough?” Seattle roared, his own eyes and teeth shifting. “I
am
an aggressive malamute, Aurelo. And I’m Alpha of our family now so don’t fuck with me on this. Get out. We’re on the run here and trying to save lives. You think Chicago will ever forgive himself if he puts us in danger or risks that mission?”
And just like that the anger haze cleared so some of the reason could come back. Sure I was still in pain from what Aurelo said to me but I was at least playing with a full deck again. “No, I wouldn’t. I’m back.”
Seattle searched my eyes a moment. “You sure? What happened?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never felt that. I was upset, having a meltdown, and then he brought up Milwaukee again and I just—the rage.”