The Conqueror's Dilemma (37 page)

‘And
what of your mother? What of the risk? What of your vaunted resemblance to your
father?’

Stunned,
William stared at her. ‘How in the world do you know of that?’ Sudden fury
seized him. ‘Hector betrayed me! No, I know what must have happened. He told it
to Ariadne—or she wormed it out of him. And you had it from her, did you not?’

Tiffany
lost all control. ‘No, Mr Westerham, I had it from
you
. You need not be
so quick to blame your friends. I am the wretch who was eavesdropping when you
spoke of it to Hector.’

‘You
heard it?’

Shock
superseded the anger suffusing his cheeks, but Tiffany cared nothing for
either.

‘Believe
me, it’s the last thing I wished for. I came out for a breath of air, and hid
when I heard voices. And then it was you, and Lord Kilbride began upon that
matter and I could not escape. Be angry if you will, but I assure you I have
been sufficiently punished for listening.’

William’s
instant reaction had been automatic, to think a matter so intensely personal
had been passed, by whatever means, to another. But that other was Tiffany, and
it swept across him that the knowledge she had acquired was colouring her
attitude. Which was intolerable.

Without
hesitation, he moved to her, seizing her by the shoulders. ‘If you heard as
much, you must also have heard me speak of having to fight my growing
attachment to you.’

The
flat of her hands came up, pushing at his chest to hold him off. Her eyes
sparked at him.

‘Let
me go! It is of no use to pretend. If you loved me the least little bit, you
would not have held aloof from me. No, nor refused my uncle. Nor d-decided to
l-leave Town, telling me I must f-forget all about you.’

‘I
never said that,’ William protested.

‘Well, you spoke of my ruing having met you, and—’

‘I
said I hoped you would not always rue the day you met me. And if you weren’t
such a widgeon, you’d see that everything you complain of points exactly to my
loving you far too much to be able to adhere to my long-held vow.’

Tiffany’s
heart was hushed. He had said it. He had said he loved her. She stopped trying
to push him away, and stared up into his face where the glimmer of a smile was
lurking. She drew a painful breath.

‘What
vow?’

He
heard the sob underneath, and his heart flooded with affection. His hands
slipped from her shoulders to her back and he drew her closer.

‘A
vow, my dearest one, that I made when I did not understand how love—honest
selfless love—inspires a wish to cherish, and not to harm.’

‘Do
you—?’ Tiffany stopped, a constriction in her throat making speech impossible.

‘Do I
understand it now?’ The brown eyes grew conscious. ‘You will say it took me
long enough, and I cannot deny it. I think it was Juliana who sowed the seed of
enlightenment.’

Tiffany
found her voice. ‘Lady Yelverton? Ariadne said something of the sort.’

‘Ju
spoke of me being crossed in love. Still I refused to acknowledge it. But when
I heard you were planning to leave, that all my foolish sacrifice would be in
vain, then indeed the evidence was too great even for my determined idiocy.’

With tentative
fingers, she reached to touch his face. ‘Then you do—’

William’s
hold upon her loosened as he released one hand and caught at her fingers,
pressing them to his mouth.

‘Then
I do love you, yes. More than life.’ He punctuated his words with kisses upon
her fingertips. ‘More than ambition. More than pride or any other thing upon
which I thought I had set my heart.’

He
held her fingers close, watching as the shadows slowly vanished from her
fascinating orbs, leaving them clear and blue. The burdens on his heart
lightened.

‘Now
do you believe me?’

With a
suddenness that took his breath away, the imps leapt into her eyes. ‘Oh, I
shall require deeper proofs than these, Mr Westerham.’

And to
his amazed delight, Tiffany reached up and kissed him full on the mouth. As she
came away, a smile hovered on her lips. A pretty provocation sounded in her
voice.

‘Can
you manage to convince me, do you think?’

Needing
no further invitation, William swept her into his arms. And then Tiffany was
drowning in a ripple of heat as his lips found hers. The softness of his kiss
was a startling revelation, so much tenderness within it that her eyes began to
prick. He pressed closer, exuding warmth, and Tiffany was obliged to swallow on
a rising sob.

William
heard it, and instantly released her mouth, raising his head. ‘My sweet love,
are you crying? Oh, don’t. That is too great a reproach for me to bear.’

She
hiccupped a little, catching her breath. ‘I’m just so h-happy.’

He
laughed—for the first time in days, as it felt to him. ‘Ah, is that it? I see I
have much to learn of your topsy-turvy ways, my darling.’

Tiffany
gave a watery chuckle. ‘I dare say we each have a deal to learn.’

William
eyed her hungrily. ‘Presently. At this moment, I am only interested in
providing you with more of these solid proofs.’

She
lifted her face to meet the promised kiss as he leaned down. His mouth hovered
over hers for a brief moment and his arms slid about her, drawing her close.
Then his lips came down in crushing demand, not gentle at all, but redolent
with passion.

Flinging
her arms about his neck, Tiffany answered the kiss with the full strength of
the love she had been obliged to deny herself for an aeon. Her senses swam, and
for several moments she was aware of nothing but the flood of warmth pervading
her whole body.

William
came up for air at last, drawing in a lungful of breath and sighing it out.
‘I’ve been wanting to do that for weeks.’

‘And I
have longed for you to do it,’ Tiffany confessed, ‘despite every injunction to
desist.’

Her
stomach wriggled as the brown eyes smiled at her. ‘Injunctions from whom? The
determinedly aloof Miss Felton?’

Tiffany
became indignant. ‘I was not aloof!’

William
laughed. ‘No, but you tried to be. And I don’t blame you in the least.’ He let
out a regretful breath. ‘We still have much to ponder, Tiffany.’

He led
her to a chair and sat down himself, leaning forward so that he might retain
his clasp on her hand. Was it wariness in her eyes again? He reached out and
stroked the trace of wetness under them.

‘Don’t
look like that—as if you feared you were skating on thin ice again. That at
least is over, I promise you.’

But
Tiffany could not allow herself to relax. ‘But what is there to ponder, Will?
Is it my inheritance?’

She
winced as he gripped her fingers, but she made no complaint. The look in his
face caught too deeply in her bosom.

‘We
had best get it out of the way,’ he said, the rapidity of the words showing his
discomfort. ‘My inclination would be to tie it up so I might not benefit, but
that I know to be folly. You are not to be deprived of what is your right
merely to accommodate my conscience. And if you are to partake of it, I have no
choice but to do likewise. I have no means with which to provide for you.’

Tiffany
laid her hand over his unquiet fingers. ‘Will, until a few days since, I had no
expectations either. It is like a windfall to me. And you refused to benefit by
it on the instant you heard of my fortune.’

‘Dear
God, of course I did! For what do you take me?’

She gripped
the hand she held. ‘I am not judging you, Will. I am trying to make you
understand that this fortune never made me the heiress you were seeking. You
began to care for me long before you knew of it.’

His
hand reached out and caressed her cheek. ‘I began the moment I saw you peeping
at me from behind that pillar.’

Tiffany
turned her cheek upon his hand, feeling its rough edge with a swell at her
breast. She smiled at him. ‘That makes two of us.’

William
leaned across to kiss her again. ‘A very gratifying sentiment, my sweet, but it
does not get us any further forward.’ He let out a sigh. ‘I may as well know
the full extent of the damage. How much are you worth, do you know?’

‘I
have no notion.’

He was
conscious of relief. Perhaps it was not as large a sum as he had dreaded.

‘Did
your uncle not tell you?’

‘I
have not been in a frame of mind to discuss the matter. Uncle Matt said only
that I am left my father’s share of their shipping business.’

‘Is it
profitable?’

Tiffany
eyed him, puzzled, but she answered with truth. ‘Very, if I am to judge by the
quantity of ships and the merchanting undertaken. But Uncle Matt is not a man
either to squander or show off his wealth. He and my aunt live very simply, by
comparison with London habits at least.’

The
sudden light that came into Will’s eyes cheered her.

‘Then
we may do likewise. Why should we not take up residence nearby? Perhaps I may
learn to assist your uncle at his trading?’

A
stifled giggle greeted this suggestion, and William sat back, releasing
Tiffany’s hand. ‘That amuses you?’

He was
peeved, but he thawed at once as those entrancing devils began to dance in her
eyes. Her mouth quirked at the corners.

‘I can
just see you, Will. Shall you become the conqueror of the shipping trade too?’

He was
obliged to smile. ‘I confess I was thinking of something a trifle lowlier than
that.’

Tiffany
came forward suddenly in her chair, moving to seize William’s hands. The clear
blue eyes gazed at him with so much love in them as to swell his heart to
bursting.

‘Oh,
Will, how can you think I would consent to let you live in any other way than
you are used to do? Yes, perhaps we may spend some weeks or months in the
country, but I will not suffer you to abandon the life you worked so hard to
build up. I could not endure to see it.’

William
rose to his feet, and dragged her up and into his arms. ‘For God’s sake,
Tiffany, must you be so generous?’

He
kissed her fiercely, as if with his lips he might silence the outpourings of
her heart. But the feel of her against him melted away the thrust of
conscience, and he knew he must accept this as he had accepted the inevitable
and given in to the promptings of his innermost desires.

When
at last he released her, Tiffany was reduced to a shuddering jelly. She could
do nothing but sag within his hold, gasping for breath.

She
felt him press her close, and heard the rumble of his voice in his chest. ‘You
have bewitched me, my sweet Tiffany. I am as wax in your hands.’

With
an effort, she raised her head to look anxiously up at him. ‘You will consent?’

‘How
can I do otherwise? You are, as usual, in the right of it. I dare say I should
fail dismally if I attempted to change all my habits. And if we are to indulge
in the social scene, at least I will be at hand to smooth your path. You need never
again be anxious as to how to act.’

The
bright blue orbs began to dance. ‘There now, Mr Westerham, we have the perfect
bargain. I will engage to provide the means, and the Conqueror will guide my
steps.’

William
laughed out. ‘If you will have it so, Miss Felton. Or—dare I say it?—the future
Mrs Westerham.’

To his
consternation, the light died out of her eyes, to be replaced by an echo of the
uncertain look she had worn when he first entered the room.

‘My
love, what is it? What have I said?’

Tiffany
drew herself gently out of his arms and stepped back a pace. ‘That is the first
mention you have made of—of marriage.’

The
brown of his eyes darkened, and his voice was icy. ‘Did you suppose I meant to
offer you a carte blanche?’

‘Of
course not. I know well enough you would not so insult me. I said as much to my
aunt and uncle when I told them you would not have me, though you wanted me.’

‘It’s
not precisely how you put it at Vauxhall.’

Her
quick spurt of temper died, and she reached out to him. ‘Don’t speak of
Vauxhall, for I can’t bear to think of that day.’

Consternation
came into his face as he took the hand she held out and drew her to him.
‘Forgive me. That was uncalled for.’

Tiffany
accepted his kiss, and then leaned back so she could look at him. ‘I phrased it
badly perhaps. I was remembering what you said of your parents’ marriage, I
think. I wanted to be sure—no, I wanted
you
to be sure. You were so
afraid to be like your father…’

Will
released her abruptly, his eyes darkening. ‘I am like him. All the while I
fought against my growing affection for you, I was made more strongly aware of
it.’ A harsh laugh escaped him. ‘I was jealous of Sir Lambert Chicheley—and you
suffered for it. Young Jeremy was a victim, and I will confess at the time I
was minded to shake you until your teeth rattled.’

‘But
you didn’t,’ Tiffany pointed out swiftly. ‘You may have had such an urge, but
you controlled it.’

‘Only
because I had foreknowledge of what I might do should I follow in my father’s
footsteps,’ he said, the bitter note pronounced.

‘Will,
don’t you see? You are as unlike your father as you can be. Perhaps because of
him, I don’t know. But your jealousy, such as it is, bears no relation to his.
In fact, it is much more like mine.’

Arrested,
William stared at her. ‘You were jealous?’

‘You
have no notion how much. I have been ready any time to stick a knife into Lady
Yelverton these many weeks.’

William
took her back into his arms. ‘You need not feel jealous of Juliana. I had never
for her a tithe of the feelings I have for you.’

A glow
invaded Tiffany’s bosom. ‘Truly? I mean, you truly love me so much?’

His
dark eyes glowed with warmth. ‘So very much.’