The Demon Lover (18 page)

But the bars at the windows . They suggested a prison. A prison!

I felt consciousness coming back. This was not a dream. I was still here. I was lying in a bed with the Baron . and we were . lovers. Lovers! What a travesty of the word!

I tried to sit up, but he held me down. I could not but be aware of how strong he was and how puny I was in comparison.

“This can’t be true,” I said.

His voice was low and triumphant.

“But it is. Too late for regrets now, Kate. It has happened. You and I… as I knew as soon as I set eyes on you it must be … and it was going to be.”

I continued to struggle.

“Be still, Kate,” he said.

“You’re bewildered. You are just realizing what has happened. Last night you became my beloved mistress.”

“This is… madness.”

“The effect of the wine is still with you. It will last some time yet.

It had to be, Kate. It was the only way. Now if I had appeared suddenly and said “I want you, Kate. My desire for you is so overwhelming that it must be satisfied” what would you have said?

You would have laughed me to scorn even though somewhere at the back of your mind was the thought: How I should like to give myself up to the pleasure he can provide. He is the only one. I want to be taken by him as his ancestors took women when they raided the coast. “

My mind was clearing with every passing moment. I murmured: “I was with that woman …”

“My good servant.”

“The carriage had broken down …”

“It was all arranged, darling. I’m sorry it had to be like that. If you had come willingly … but you never would. Your stern upbringing would have suppressed your natural instincts and you would have convinced yourself that they did not exist.”

“I can’t …”

“Don’t try. Lie still. Oh Kate, it was wonderful. You are magnificent.

You’re a woman as well as an artist. I admire you so much, Kate. “

Through my befugged sensations came the appalling realization of what had happened. He had planned it and I had been the victim of. rape.

I, Kate Collison, had been raped by the man I most detested . this arrogant Baron who thought he had only to beckon to a woman to make her come running. He followed the customs of his marauding ancestors who had lived by rape and pillage. And I. had been his victim. I could not believe it. even now. “

I said: “Let me get out of here.”

“My dearest Kate, you will go at my pleasure.”

“At your pleasure! You are a monster.”

“I know,” he agreed.

“But in your heart you rather like this monster, Kate. I will have you recognized as a great artist. Just think what I have done for you already.”

“I can think of nothing but what you have just done to me.”

“Proud Kate, taken in a drunken stupor.”

“That wine was drugged. That woman …”

“Don’t blame her. She was obeying orders.”

“A sort of pander…”

“Hardly an apt description. What is done is done, Kate. You are a woman now. You and I have explored the realms of delight together ..

”

“Of degradation!” I said.

“You are cynical. You are laughing at me.

That is what I would expect of you. “

“Do you hate me still?”

“A thousand times more than I ever did.”

“Perhaps while you are here I can make you change your mind.”

“The more time I spent with you, the more I should hate you. What do you mean … while I am here?”

“You are detained … on my baronial pleasure.”

“You can’t mean you would keep me here.”

He nodded.

“I could,” he said.

“For what purpose?”

“I thought I had demonstrated that.”

“You’ve gone mad.”

“Mad with desire for you.”

I tried to rise but he was still holding me down, and when I lifted my head I felt dizzy.

“What is your purpose?” I demanded.

“First to turn a rather haughty self-possessed young lady into a warm and passionate woman.”

“I will never feel anything but hatred and contempt for you. And you say … first…”

“There is something else.”

“Well?”

“I think we will discuss it later when you are feeling a little refreshed.”

“I want to know now.”

“My dear Kate, it is I who make the rules here. Haven’t you learned that yet?”

“What am I supposed to be … a sort of slave?”

“A very favoured slave.”

I was silent, still trying to convince myself that I was not dreaming.

His voice was gentle in my ear.

“Try to be calm, Kate. Accept this.

You and I have been lovers all through this night. “

“Lovers! You are not a lover of mine and never will be.”

“Well, just say that last night you became my mistress. That’s rather important.”

I felt weak suddenly and very frightened. It seemed that my life had taken an abrupt turn into an entirely different world.

THE DEMON ai

“Sleep, dear Kate,” he said soothingly and he gathered me up in his arms as though I were a baby.

I must have slept, for when I awoke it was morning. My head had cleared and I sat up in bed and looked about me. I was alone. I realized that I was naked and when I saw the bars across the windows, the monstrous happenings of the previous night came flooding back to me.

I looked about the room. It was like a part of the castle-large, with a high vaulted roof supported by strong stone pillars. There was a great fireplace and the embers there showed that there had been a fire last night. The bed was large and had velvet curtains about it and there were carpets on the floor. In spite of this it was like a medieval stronghold.

I had undergone a change. I felt bruised and unclean. I had to face the truth. He had brought me up here; he had taken off my clothes, put me into this bed and committed rape.

I put my hands over my face as the hot flush spread there. Nothing would ever be the same again. Since I had come to France everything had changed. The cosy world ofFarring-don was slipping away from me and I had been plunged into intrigue . and rape . the sort of thing that had happened centuries ago.

And there was one man who was responsible for this. I could not get his face out of my mind. I realized I had been seeing it ever since I had left the castle. I had seen it in the gargoyles of Notre Dame. I had seen it in my dreams. I wondered briefly if he had some supernatural power-a gift passed on from those pirate forebears.

I had to be calm. I had to consider the position in which I found myself. I think I had always known that he had desired me. There was something in the way he had looked at me right from the beginning. I should have been warned, for when he desired a woman he thought he had the right to take her, whether she was willing or not. That was what the marauding Normans had done, and he lived up to the old traditions.

I should never feel the same again. I should never feel clean. He had defiled me and gloried in it. He thought that because he had humiliated me, he had made me his slave.

I had to get out of here quickly. Then I would think about revenge.

Nowadays no man should be allowed to act as he had done. It was all very well to make love to a woman if she consented. But to snare a virtuous woman and drug her and then take advantage of the situation, that was the way cowards and demons worked.

My hatred was so intense that I was shaking. I must get out of here.

That was the first thing. I would go down to the woman who had given me the wine. I would tell her that I was going to the police.

Could I? How? I imagined he controlled most things round here. He would say: “She spent the night with me willingly …” For he was capable of anything. Lies would be second nature to him.

I would dress immediately.

I stepped out of bed. I looked at the pillow still indented where his head had been. I punched it in sudden fury and was then ashamed of my childish gesture. It was an act of petulant folly and in spite of what happened I prided myself on being a sensible woman.

I had been betrayed. I had been raped. My attacker had been the one man in the world whom I hated most. But it was done. I had been violated. My body . my mind . my freedom to act had been taken into his control. I had been forced.

But now . the first thing was to get out of this place.

I looked for my clothes. I could not find them. They were all gone . my shoes . everything.

There was a counterpane on the bed and I wrapped this round me. Then I set out to explore. To my momentary delight the door was not locked. I was on a kind of landing and before me was a small flight of stone stairs the usual spiral kind cut out of the wall, wide at one end and narrowing by the post. I saw that there was one room in which there were toilet facilities. I caught sight of a mirror on a table and a wash basin and ewer. There were cupboards. I thought my clothes might be in one of them, so I opened them all. There were towels and such things, but no clothes.

I saw that there was another room. In this were a table and chairs. It might have been a dining-room. But there were no clothes.

Cautiously I descended the stairs. A big door was facing me. It had iron studs in it and looked very strong. I tried to open it. It was locked.

I looked about me. Barred windows everywhere, a heavy locked door, and no clothes. I was indeed the prisoner of the Baron’s pleasure.

I was suddenly frantic. My resolutions to be calm slipped away from me.

How long would he keep me here? Would he come again? I would refuse to drink more wine. Perhaps he would not care. He could easily overpower me. I had been aware of his immense strength last night.

Locked up here . within these stone walls with barred windows I should not have a chance.

I started to hammer on the door. Then I sat down on the stone step and gave way to my despair.

I heard a voice.

“All right. All right. I’m coming!”

I was alert and kept my eyes on the door. If it was the woman I had seen last night, I might be able to get past her. I might find my clothes. My baggage might be somewhere here. The man-Jacques Petit -he had brought it in from the carriage last night If I could get

dressed I could escape. This place was on the road-five miles or so from Cente

R

ville. I had an idea of the direction. I could only think of escape.

I heard a key turning in the lock. The door creaked open. I was waiting, tense.

The woman was carrying a copper jug of hot water. She came in and set it down. It was my chance and I took it. I dashed to the door. A man was standing there. He was tall and his arms were folded across his chest. He shook his head at me. I tried to elude him, but he caught me and lifting me up as though I were a child, he put me back behind the door.

Then he shut it.

“No use,” said the woman, looking as cosy as she had on the previous night.

“There are guards.”

I cried out: “What is this? Some medieval game?”

“Baron’s orders,” she answered.

She lifted the jug and went up the stairs to the room where I had seen the basin and ewer.

“Now,” she said briskly,” I brought the water first because I thought you’d be one of them ladies as like to wash first. Now I’ll bring your petit dejeuner. You’ll find everything you want. I’ll bring you something to put on. That bed coverlet is not ideal, is it? And your poor feet? These stone floors can be that cold don’t I know it.”

I followed her up and when she had put down the jug I caught her arm.

“You gave me drugged wine last night,” I said.

She lifted her shoulders.

“You deceived me … wickedly.”

“It was orders,” she said.

“Baron’s orders,” I repeated.

She was silent.

I went on: “Does he make a habit of this sort of thing?”

“You never know what he’s going to do. He’s had ladies here before . Most of them have come willingly, if you know what I mean.”

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“And the unwilling ones have to be drugged?”

“Well, we’ve not had any of those before… only them that had to be persuaded, like.”

“It’s like finding oneself back five hundred years. Bring my clothes . my own clothes.”

She shrugged her shoulders again.

I let her go and went into the toilet room. At least I should feel a little better if I washed. I felt emotional as I saw myself in the mirror. There were bruises on my body and I was glad of my long hair which covered me like a cloak. I felt better when I had thoroughly washed and by that time the woman came back with hot coffee and rolls with butter and preserves.

I resisted the impulse to run to the stairs because I knew that was futile.

She took the tray into the room which I had thought was a dining-room and set it on the table. Then she was gone but in a few moments she was back carrying a long fur-trimmed robe. It was greenish with a thread of gold in it and the fur edged the hem as well as the long wide sleeves. She carried three pairs of satin sandals.

“I wasn’t sure of the size,” she said comfortably.

“Oh my God, does he have victims of various sizes?”

“It’s for you to choose, Mademoiselle.”

Clothes were necessary for me if I was to plan some action so I selected a pair of the sandals and took the robe from her.

When she had gone I put it on. It was soft and silken and very comfortable. It was amazing what a difference washing and putting on clothes made to me.

I was surprised that I could eat anything, but I did and the coffee was good. As Soon as I had drunk it I thought I had been a fool to touch it. How could I know whether anything was drugged or not.

But why should he want to drug me now; he had done his evil work.

That reminded me afresh and I felt the bitter humiliation creeping over me. I wished that I could have remembered, and then I was glad that I had not. There had been moments of consciousness and later when I had been coming out of my drowsiness he had taken me . almost casually.

I hated him. How I hated him! My father used to say, “Envy is a negative emotion. It hurts the one who feels it more than the one against whom it is directed.” So with hatred.