The Destroyer Book 3 (16 page)

“I guessed it then.” My mother sneered and blood dripped out of the corner of her lip. “You want the kingdom for yourself. You were always jealous of him and our marriage. Will you force yourself on me like you will rape Nia?” She let out a mocking laugh.

“No, Otrila. You are the ugliest woman I have ever met, and the idea of laying with you makes my mouth taste of vomit. I never envied my brother. I was allowed to marry the woman that I loved and make a beautiful child with her. He was forced to spend his life joined to you. I never wanted to be king. I only wanted to raise my family in peace.” My mother’s eyes grew large at his words and she frowned. I had never seen my mother cry, but it seemed that Beltor’s statement hit a nerve with the mean woman.

“I serve our kingdom. My brother is dead. Your son is a traitor for having made an alliance with our enemy. There is only one rightful ruler of our land.” He nodded at me and smiled. The grin made my heart ache to see my father again. My uncle's hair was a few shades darker than my father's, but they shared the same smile.

“I’ll agree with that.” Greykin looked at me and grunted.

“Me?” I gasped and my mother snorted.

“Yes, Jessmei. Our armies will follow you. Our people will follow you. We’ll just need to secure you somewhere safe for a few months, until our main force can return from the North. The Elvens and Loshers cannot stand against our army. We outnumber them too greatly."

“But they hold the castle. How will we fight them?” It was the only idea I could grasp as the significance of his words swirled around in my head.

“Let us worry about that. You’ll have generals, advisors, Greykin and me to guide you. It is your birthright and we need you to claim it.” He nodded and smiled reassuringly at me.

My mother drew in a sharp intake of breath and Beltor shot her an angry look that cut her voice off like a muted harp string.

“First, we will get Queen Jessmei to safety.” Greykin got up and stretched his massive shoulders.

“Girl.” Greykin pointed at Tira. The poor girl’s face turned white at his attention. “When Jessmei is crowned she will ask you to come to the castle and visit with her. There will be banquets, dancers, musicians, and a circus. Would that interest you?” Tira’s eyes grew wide and she nodded eagerly, all fear forgotten with the thought of circuses. “Excellent. But she needs your help to get clothes together for her trip. Can you take her to your room and find clothes?” Tira was still about six winters younger than me and the tattered dress I wore was probably the only garment in the home that would fit me.

“I have clothes she can take,” Greta said. It was the first she had spoken since Greykin and Beltor dragged Jiure into the home and explained to his parents what he had tried to do to me, and who I actually was.

“Good. We will also need you to prepare food for us. Quickly.” Greta got up from her chair and nodded. She pulled her daughter close and gave her instructions on what clothes to get for me.

“Boy, come here.” Beltor pointed at Jiure. My attacker’s face was covered in dried tears, dirt, and blood. He crawled on his hands and knees and knelt before my uncle. His forehead touched the ground and he trembled like a leaf in the wind. The boy looked so small and insignificant. I should have felt happy to see him reduced to such a state after he tried to force himself on me. But all I felt was sadness and regret. I did not want him to be killed.

“I have decided not to execute you. I will give you a chance to redeem yourself.” Rayat and Greta gasped. “Do you wish for redemption boy?” my uncle asked

“Y-y-y-y-yes. Forgive me, my lord,” the boy stuttered. His breath whistled through the missing teeth and I felt a bit of satisfaction that I had done that to him. I did not want him to die, but he deserved the wounds I had inflicted and I was still surprised I had been able to fight him off at all.

“I am not the one to bestow forgiveness upon you.” He gestured to me.

“I am sorry, my queen. So sorry. Please forgive me.” Jiure looked up at me from the ground. Fresh tears streamed down his face and mixed with the dried blood.

“I forgive you,” I choked on the words. My mother snorted, crossed her arms, and turned her face away from me. I probably should have said something different to the boy. My hand clutched my stomach and I remembered where he had hit me. I asked my grandmother to protect us and felt warmth spread through my body.

“Get to your feet. Wash your face. I need you to walk out of the house and track the comings and goings of the Ancients. If it looks like the four of us can make a break for our horses, come get us.” Jiure nodded gratefully until my uncle gestured toward the door. The boy dashed out like the home was on fire.

“I’ll fetch you some more clothes. Can you come with me?” Tira’s voice was but a whisper and she clutched delicately at my hand. She probably didn’t understand exactly what had transpired. Or maybe she did. Children had a way of knowing what was real. Perhaps she suspected who I was this whole time. I let the girl drag me into the back room where Rayat and Greta slept. I heard my uncle, Greykin, Greta, and Rayat whispering. Then Tira asked me what it was like to be a queen and I had to focus on her questions.

After a few minutes, she gathered two of Greta’s summer dresses that would fit me. They were probably too thin for the current weather, but the winter was turning and Greykin’s cloak would keep me warm for whatever journey we had ahead of us.

I changed into one of the dresses. It was rough cotton dyed dark blue. It felt smooth against my skin compared to the cloak and I was grateful to discard the tattered garment I had been wearing. I realized that Kaiyer had left a supply pack in the room I shared with Tira. It contained a cooking set, bedroll, and spare clothes that we had altered to fit me. I grabbed it on the way back to the family room.

“I am ready.” As soon as the words left my mouth I realized that I would miss Tira and Greta immensely.

I would miss how much being here reminded me of Kaiyer. Other than the cave we had lived in for a few weeks, our time here was the closest we had come to living as a joined couple. Though Jiure and the Ancients had spoiled the place, I still felt sad about leaving.

Nadea’s father took some of the gold coins out of the pouch and gave them to Rayat. The rancher nodded and seemed grateful for the amount Beltor had given him. “Here is most of our jerked beef and cheese.” Greta looked exhausted and her voice confirmed her stress. Greykin took the large bag from Rayat’s wife and carefully put it into a thick leather backpack.

“Say your goodbyes, Jessmei,” Beltor said before he paced over to the window to look through the curtains again.

“I am so ashamed, my queen.” Rayat kneeled on the dirty wood floor in front of me. My stomach flipped and I started to feel sick. His wife and daughter quickly followed and threw themselves on the floor before me.

“No. No. No,” I stuttered. “Stand please. Thank you for caring for me.” I reached down and tried to pull Greta up but she resisted me. Tira sobbed loudly and Rayat put his hand over her mouth to quiet her.

The door opened suddenly. Greykin and Beltor reached for their weapons.

“They have moved to the Yerling’s property. I don’t see any of them near us.” Jiure's eyes were wide and fearful.

“Very well. Thank you, boy,” Beltor said. I sensed a nervous tension in his voice. He nodded to Greykin and my protector touched me on my back. I gently removed my hands from Rayat’s shoulders.

My mother took a deep breath, but the words caught in her mouth when Nadea’s father shot her an angry look. Then she sighed and rose gracefully from the chair.

The rest was a blur of tears and a painful, sick feeling of fear in my stomach. I had been so happy here with Kaiyer, and then everything changed. I didn’t blame Jiure. Maybe I had looked at him inappropriately. Maybe I had not spoken of Kaiyer enough.

All I wanted was a new life, one where I might have been happy with my lover, raised a simple family, and found contentment. I had run away from home and chased after Nadea because I wanted to taste some of the adventure that she loved. But now I knew I didn’t want adventure. I didn’t want my mother’s life either. I had never fully realized the danger of being married to a king until my father’s death.

My rescuers had four horses hidden a hundred yards into the forest south of Rayat’s home. Greykin helped me climb into the saddle of the steed carrying most of the supplies. It wasn’t a lady’s saddle, so I had to spread my legs on each side of the horse instead of over one side. The riding position made my new dress squeeze my thighs painfully. We needed to escape and I could ride faster sitting as a man, so I didn't complain. My foot still throbbed from the thorn I had stepped on, but Tira had cleaned and bandaged the wound, and Greta had inspected it and assured me it was shallow and would heal nicely. I looked back and my mother and the look of horror on her face confirmed my assumption that she would be protesting if it weren’t for my uncle’s stern admonitions earlier.

“Westward. To the coast.” Beltor led the way and Greykin trailed behind my mother. Dusk was settling and the trees were not dense enough to protect us from the cool late winter breeze.

“Why west?” I whispered to Nadea’s father.

“Your idea for the boat was good, but I did not want the peasants to know our intentions. The Ancients will return there and extract our plans from them.”

I felt a surprising surge of pleasure and pride as I realized we were doing what I had suggested. I stifled a smile and simply nodded at his response. Maybe I was smart enough to make decisions for Nia. Or I could be, in time.

“Will they be safe? The Ancients won’t hurt them, will they? The two that came to the door gave us money for the cattle. I thought they would just kill us and take everything.” I pulled my horse up next to his so I might whisper. My mother would not approve of my concern for Rayat and his family.

“I don’t know, Jess.” Beltor shook his head and looked at me. There was enough light from the setting sun to see the worry in his eyes. “I am surprised as well. The two Ancients that bought the cattle differed greatly from the ones that interrupted the banquet. Like us, I suppose they are all unique." I nodded again at his words and we rode in silence for a few more minutes. The sky turned a darker shade of purple and I hoped the deeper night would prevent the Ancients from following us.

"Should I have punished Jiure, uncle?" I asked. I already guessed what my mother thought, but Beltor was wise and knew what advice my father would have given.

"Being a leader of a kingdom involves making decisions that most might not agree with." He looked backward toward Otrila, but she rode many horse lengths behind us and would not hear his words. "Justice is important, but so is forgiveness. The kingdom had little to gain if you were to execute the lad. Rayat seems to be a leader in his community and while this village is on the outskirts of Nia, you never know when you will need support. I think you made the right choice. His intent was horrible, but he did not actually execute those intentions, and he is no danger to you any longer."

"Because you and Greykin stopped him. If you had not been there I might have been . . ." My words trailed off and I thought about the blow I took to my stomach. A new wave of guilt flowed through me as I realized another possibility. “Leaving him,” I hesitated, “leaving him unpunished, he may act this way again. He may hurt another woman. I could have prevented this if . . .”

"Aye, Jess. We can only rule on the present. We cannot treat someone's intent as if it is the same as actually committing a crime. We cannot judge their future actions and prevent all evil through unjust punishment. I believe he will remember his fear, and your compassion, and have a greater respect for others going forward. You made the right choice." He reached across the gap that separated our horses and squeezed my shoulder gently. His hand was warm and made me feel at ease.

He smiled again and gave a light chuckle that reminded me of my father. Thoughts of him filled me with sadness that I knew might never leave me. He had been a great man and a wonderful father. The exact opposite of my mother. I wanted to talk to him again, to hug him, to kiss him, to tell him about Kaiyer and our love. But I never could. He had been taken from me forever.

"Uncle. I need to tell you something." I wiped the tears from my eyes. If I couldn't tell my father, then his brother would be my next choice. He looked over at me and raised an eyebrow that was hard to see in the approaching darkness.

I leaned over the saddle across the gap to whisper in his ear and winced as the dress pinched into my legs. Soon nothing would fit me and I would be in more pain.

Pain was worth this love.

"I am with child," I said.