CHAPTER ONE
I woke early, while the sky was still dark and the streets outside the window silent. Sleep eluded me most of the night, after I learned that I had a son and that he was dying from leukemia—likely because of the genes I unknowingly passed on to him. Filled with nervous energy mixed with dread, I wanted to start the testing process and any preparations for treatment as soon as possible. I could only hope and pray that I was a match for Liam and could help to save his life.
Kate was fast asleep beside me, her hand tucked beneath her chin, the covers almost over her head. I felt such warmth for her while I watched her sleep. She’d been there for me from the moment I learned about Liam and had stood up to Chris when he was rude to her and said bad things about me. I really wanted to go and punch the bastard out but that would do no one any good.
What was needed was calm patience. I’d have to work really hard for both.
I slipped out of bed without waking Kate and went to the bathroom to get ready. While I passed my chest of drawers, I checked my cell for messages and sure enough, there was a text from Liam’s oncologist who wanted me to come in as soon as possible for the test. I felt relieved that things were in place and would move quickly. Being a doctor really helped grease the wheels when you had a medical issue.
I went to the bathroom and began my morning routine with a shower. Then, as I brushed my teeth, I heard Kate yawning in the bedroom and I peeked at her. She looked ravishing with her messy hair and sleepy eyes. As much as I would have liked to climb back under the covers with her and snuggle down onto the bed for some morning sex, I had to keep moving. If I thought too much, I knew I could become upset very easily.
"You're up early," she called from the bed.
I rinsed my mouth and went to the side of the bed.
"You were sleeping like a baby. You tossed and turned until pretty late, so I figured I'd let you sleep in."
I leaned down and kissed her as she lay under the thick coverlet.
"Are you coming back to bed?" she asked as she brushed a strand of damp hair from my eyes.
"No can do. The oncologist called and left me a message. I have to get my test today. What are your plans?" I said as I started to dress after I selected a shirt and tie from the closet.
"I have absolutely nothing to do." She stretched her arms out and smiled.
"Don’t forget to take your meds,” I said. “Even though we might not be going for a while, you should build up your levels. Text me so I know you're okay. Malarone can have side effects, especially for people who've had previous periods of clinical depression."
She nodded and smiled. "Always the doctor."
"You know it." I leaned down and kissed her once more.
"I'll miss you."
“I’ll miss you.” I smiled at her and pulled on my pants. "I'm not used to having a woman in my bed. I think I should have woken you for a quickie. You look very delicious, lying there all warm and naked under my covers, Ms. Bennet."
"You should have. I might just have to look at dirty pictures on the web and do myself." She grinned mischievously.
"You'll do no such thing, you
tease
," I said as I fastened my belt. "You are
not
allowed to masturbate unless I'm watching."
"What you don't know will please me," she said, biting her lip.
I frowned and leaned back down again, bending over her. "No, Kate. I'm serious. When you're mine, I own
all
your orgasms. No masturbation unless I'm watching. Do you understand?"
She frowned. "I can't masturbate unless I'm with you?"
I nodded, because I needed her to understand how possessive I was about her pleasure. "I thought you understood. You're
mine
sexually. Would you like it if I was to masturbate when we're apart or would you prefer that I save it all up for you?"
She shook her head. "No. I understand. I was kidding."
I exhaled. "I don't want to be overly possessive, Kate. But this is important. I'm very jealous and want every orgasm you have to be mine."
"I understand. I was making a joke, teasing."
I nodded and buttoned my cuffs. "In a D/s relationship, there can be no hiding things from your Dom. Anything to do with sex, with our relationship, you have to be completely honest and open with me. You have to trust me and I have to trust you or this won’t work. That means, as hard as it may be at times, complete honesty."
She exhaled. "I'm sorry. I'll try to be as honest and open as I can."
I leaned down closer. "I love you, Kate." I kissed her once more but was unable to get back into a playful mood.
"I love
you
," she said, and I thought I could finally see her take what I said seriously. "I wish you could stay."
"You know I want you,” I said, truly regretting that I had to leave, “but we'll have to hold that thought."
She slipped her arms around my neck. "I understand."
"This won't take long. They'll take some blood and then we'll meet in his office. I expect he'll run through the procedures in case I'm a match."
"I hope you
are
a match."
I nodded, but the chance was slim. Often, parents weren’t a good match. "Liam has a very rare mutation. I probably passed it to him. If we're a good-enough match, he'll have the best chance at survival without as many problems with rejection."
"How long before you know?"
I sighed, thinking of the usual time it took to process the tests. "We'll try to speed up the process. I know a technician and can probably pay him to stay late and run the test. I wouldn't bump anyone out of line. Physicians have these ins with technicians that we can sometimes use when we need fast results."
"If it was me, I'd do the same thing."
"Money talks."
She nodded and slipped her arms around my shoulders as she stroked me affectionately. "A parent will do anything for their child."
I harrumphed at that. "Not all of them."
"
You
will."
"I
will
." I would. I was determined to be the opposite of my father. "It may be the only thing I
can
do for him." I pulled her more tightly against me. "I'm sorry to be dragging you into all this. I'm sure you didn’t expect a lot of drama when you signed the agreement, but that's what you've got."
"I signed up to be with
you
—because I wanted you. I love you, remember?
This
," she said and kissed me. "This
drama
comes with the territory."
"I love
you
." I lifted her up and out of the bed, pressing my face in her neck as my emotions overwhelmed me. I knew how lucky I was to have her. I kissed her once more, passionately, and then let her slide down my body so that her feet were on the floor. "Sweet
sweet
Ms. Bennet with the overly-big heart."
"Sweet sweet Drake who can't keep his potatoes from mixing with the gravy." She smiled up at me and brushed a hank of my too-long hair from my face. "I wish you didn’t have to leave." She ran her hands up my chest and down to my waist.
I turned and went to the kitchen, took my coffee cup in hand and drank down the last drops. Kate followed me and threaded her arms around my waist from behind. "I look forward to our morning surprises."
"Here at Morgan Enterprises, we aim to please, Ms. Bennet," I said and chuckled as I pressed my ass into her. "But I just can't offer my services this morning."
"So you
did
you read those books," she said with mock surprise.
"What books?" I feigned innocence and turned to face her again. "You mean, Dale Carnegie on how to win friends and influence people?"
"You know very well what books."
"The first one,” I said. I was curious as hell about the books and how they portrayed BDSM. “I think pretty much every Dom I know read some, to see what the public might learn about the lifestyle."
"And?"
"I claim the Fifth," I said, for I didn’t want to insult her, but I was more of a thriller reader. "Romance isn't my thing. But I will say I have several things in common with the hero."
"Such as?"
"Well, for starters," I said and put down my coffee cup before pulling her into my arms once more. "One
very
inquisitive sub who asks a lot of questions and who makes him lose control of scenes because of her impertinence..."
"
Impertinence
," she said and kissed my shoulder.
"But I'm an old man compared to him, and not a self-made boy genius billionaire so you must be disappointed."
"Oh,
terribly
," she said and kissed me, but I knew she was joking. We kissed once more, unable to get enough of each other. My body responded to the feel of her warmth against me, her breasts pressing against my chest, the soft swell of her buttocks under my hands. I stroked up her back under her baggy t-shirt and only then did I realize that she wasn’t naked as I demanded.
"What's with the shirt? I thought I made it clear that I wanted you to always be naked when we were alone here."
She laughed. "In case you didn't notice, what with your incredible hotness and all, it's cold in your apartment. But you'll keep me warm," she said and pulled me against her firmly, grinding herself against my semi-erect cock.
"You'll make me late if you keep that up," I said playfully.
"That's the idea…"
"If I had time, I'd say yes," I said. "Making you all hot and bothered is my greatest desire, but I can't this morning."
"How long will you be?"
I rocked her in my arms for a moment, trying to think about what I still had on my business agenda. "It should take about an hour. Then I have to go to the Foundation and do some paperwork, and
then
I have to drop in at the business office to sign some papers. If the meeting this morning doesn't take too long, I should be back for dinner. Then I want us to meet back here." She was still standing in the kitchen as I got my coat and boots and left the apartment.
I drove to the hospital and parked in my usual spot, although I’d soon lose it when my contract expired. I walked to the medical offices wing and went in to see Jim Kerrigan, Liam’s oncologist. A portly man with a shock of white hair and southern charm, Kerrigan stood up and shook my hand when his receptionist escorted me into his office.
We sat down and discussed Liam’s case, how he had gone through every chemo protocol and after an initial response, had come out of remission due to a particularly aggressive form of leukemia.
“Bone marrow transplantation is his last hope at this point. We’re really hoping you’re a match, but if not, we can still look at our national databases. Liam’s young and very sick and so he’ll be on the priority list.”
I nodded, a sick feeling in my gut at the prospect I wouldn’t be a match, for I knew how hard it was to find tissue matches in time, especially with such an aggressive form of leukemia.
I shook Jim’s hand once more and then went to the lab where my blood samples would be taken in preparation for the test. I went back to my office once the technician was finished and got a fresh coffee. Then I sat down and sorted through my contacts in the hospital to call in some markers and get the test done as quickly as possible. Finally, I found a tech with whom I had a good relationship and offered to pay him to stay after hours to run the tests.
He agreed and I relaxed a bit. If it was going to be bad news, I wanted it fast.
Once I finished a last check on my remaining patients for the day, I headed to the Foundation. As I drove down the streets of Manhattan, I wondered if I’d be able to go to Nairobi after all. If Liam was going to die, I couldn’t imagine leaving and not being around for the funeral. It was a terrible position to be in—to only recently discover I was a father to a dying son, and I might only see him a few times before watching as he was lowered into the ground.
In my career as a surgeon, I’d seen a lot of death. Losing patients was hard, but you had to mourn briefly and then shut it off. How could I shut off the loss of a son?
Even if I never had a relationship with him, knowing he was alive and then dead all too soon was something I just couldn’t turn off the way I could with my own patients.
I was once again so glad that I had Kate. What would I do without her? How would I get through this?
I pushed that thought out of my mind, for it was far too unpleasant to even consider.
After going over some paperwork at the Foundation, Dave Mills and I had lunch at one of our favorite delis a few blocks away from the office.
We sat at the table in the window, and dove into heaping piles of pastrami on rye.
“So, you’re taking Kate with you? That’s a shock. I never see you with women. What happened to you?”
I laughed and chewed my sandwich for a while, thinking. What did happen? Kate was different. She was… the kind of woman I had always wanted.
Intelligent, well-bred, beautiful, sensitive, submissive…
“She’s the one,” I said, but didn't want to be any more specific, considering Dave had designs on her at one point.
“She must be,” Dave said, and made a face of surprise. “You’re a lucky man, Drake. You know I had a thing for her a few years ago but she was pretty immune to my masculine attractions.”
“Go figure,” I said and laughed.
“Yeah, who can understand women?”
He said nothing more, obviously getting a clue for once.
We spoke about Liam and the tests and how I would donate my stem cells in the hopes his new bone marrow would cure his leukemia. He asked about any change in plans for the trip to Nairobi because he had lined up a few hospital visits for me. I reviewed them and asked him to put everything on hold until I learned more about Liam.
“Makes sense,” he said, although I knew he’d put a lot of work into the trip and those involved in the hospitals would be disappointed. My family, such as it was, came first.
I wouldn't make the same mistakes my father did and put career above everything else.