The F-Word (31 page)

fuckability
noun

ability to be copulated with; (
specifically
) sexual attractiveness.

1969
Screw
(Sept. 1) 6/3: The
SCREW
sex laboratory must find the vibrating dildo limited in functionality and fuckability.
1992
M. Leyner
Et Tu, Babe
v. 126: I don’t think that those folks wrote to enhance their fuckability.
1999
Empire
(Nov.) 150/3: But the book is at its best when Figgis coaxes anecdotal material to back up the theories:…Ally Sheedy revealing she was told to “up her fuckability quotient” if she wanted to work.
2005
J. MacGregor
Sunday Money
iv. 118: For Cup drivers with talent and a good work ethic but a low mojo quotient (“deficient fuckability,” per Hollywood), there is applause but no hysteria.

fuckable
adjective

1
. sexually desirable.

1889
Capt. C. Devereaux
Venus in India
110: The poor man had at last outwitted his careful wife and obtained the much-longed-for fuckable cunt.
a
1890–93
J. S. Farmer & W. E. Henley
Slang & Its Analogues
III 80:
Fuckable
…Desirable.
1938
“Justinian”
Americana Sexualis
23:
Fuckable,
sexually desirable (of a female).
1971
J. F. Hunter
Gay Insider
xvii. 217: Youth is the
sine qua non
of desirability: males under twenty-five, butch and fuckable.
1974
J. Lahr
Hot to Trot
15: “I’d like to dip my wick into that.” “Fuckable.”
1973–77
J. Jones
Whistle
233: She was…eminently fuckable.
1978
L. Kramer
Faggots
28: If clothes make the man, what were they making?… And why was the same guy Hot and fuckable in a Pendleton and not in a Polo?
1986
R. Campbell
In La-La Land
3: Showing how brave, how manly, how fuckable he was.
1997
GQ
(Sept.) 258: Anne-Marie…is a blow-up doll—highly fuckable for her lack of will and personality.
2001
C. Whitehead
John Henry Days
iv. 323: They were all
there, from the eminently fuckable to the differently attractive, the not conventionally handsome and the walking airbrushed in complimentary [
sic
] pairs.
2004
H. Walsh
Brass
i. 21: A simple course of lazer treatment would kill the problem forever and thus transform her from an unfuckable attractive lady to a fuckable stunner.

2
. sexually available.

1889
Capt. C. Devereaux
Venus in India
142: I should never at any time object to so great a pleasure as having my prick and my balls handled by a very pretty girl, whom I knew to be fuckable.
1972
B. Rodgers
Queens’ Vernacular
25:
Available
open for sexual consideration.… Syn[onyms]:
catchable; fuckable;
[etc.].
1977
College student: What you do is, you just come right out and ask her, “How fuckable are you?”
1994
Guardian
(Sept. 17) (Weekend Suppl.) 5/3: Where are all the fuckable younger men for the older woman?
1995
Independent
(Jan. 28) 27/2: Because there is only one reason for women to exist in Updike’s world: to be fucked, or at least fuckable.
2004
S. Kandel
I Dreamed I Married Perry Mason
xxvi. 184: Thick wool legs at cocktail hour! What an affront!… Silk stockings mean you’re fuckable.

fuck-a-doodle-doo
interjection

(used to express ironic delight); “oh, wonderful”; “big deal.”

1976
J. F. Daly (book title): Fuck-a-doodle-doo.
1980
C. Garrison
Snakedoctor
186: Well, fuck-a-doodle-doo!
1990
N. Simon
Rumors
86:
ERNIE
.… (
Covering the phone.
) It’s a woman. For Glenn.
CLAIRE.
So?
ERNIE.
It sounds like Myrna.
COOKIE.
Oh, fuck-a-doodle-doo.
1994
Four Weddings & a Funeral
(film): Fuck-a-doodle-doo.
2004
Shaun of the Dead
(film): “I like having him around, he’s a laugh.” “Because he can impersonate an orangutan? Fuck-a-doodle-doo.”

fuckaholic
noun
[
FUCK
, verb
, definition 1a + -
aholic
]

a person who compulsively engages in promiscuous sexual intercourse.
Jocular
.

1981
D. Jenkins
Baja Oklahoma
246: He’s just a fuckaholic, is all he is.
1989
S. Chapple & D. Talbot
Burning Desires
294: Both were serious
fuckaholics.
1997
N. Kotker
Billy in Love
50: Every Tuesday morning. We had a regular date. Plus Marie twice a week. Plus Alice, whenever. That’s what I mean fuckaholic. I needed to have it.
2002
F. C. Wilson
Jaded Rose
v. 30: I’m still a fuckaholic and I enjoy it! Why the damn tears? More sex, more better, I always say.

fuck all
noun

1
. absolutely nothing;
FUCK
,
noun
, definitions 2a & b; (in negative constructions) anything at all; the least thing.—also as
adjective
.

1916
Record of the Trial of H. Farr
(Public Record Office: WO 71/509) f. 4: He then said, “You are a fucking coward & you will go to the trenches—I give fuck all for my life & I give fuck all for yours & I’ll get you fucking well shot.”
1918
Noyes
Slang Manuscript
(unpaged):
Fuck-all
.—(1) nothing. “There’s not a fuck-all to do this afternoon.”
1919
Athenaeum
(Aug. 1) 695: There is a very queer phrase denoting “nothing”—“—all!” No record of war slang is complete without it.
1929
F. Manning
Middle Parts of Fortune
130 [refers to 1916]: We all go over the top knowing sweet fuck-all of what we are supposed to be doing.
1939
A. C. Bessie
Men in Battle
133: Nobody’s seen fuck-all of ’em.
1941
in G. Legman
Limerick
(1954) 35: The cube of its weight…/Was four fifths of five eighths of fuck-all.
ca
1944
in A. Hopkins
Front & Rear
54: The officers they know fuck all.
ca
1950
in E. Cray
Erotic Muse
116: There was fuck-all else to do.
1965
S. Linakis
In Spring the War Ended
74: Didn’t mean fuck-all to the ones that busted you.
1967
J. Kornbluth
Notes from the New Underground
91: The
Daily Mirror
carried thirteen thousand inches of advertising—and fuck-all to read.
1976
P. Atlee
Last Domino Contract
160: They would have fuckall chance against us.
1978
L. K. Truscott
Dress Gray
45: Said the supe…didn’t know fuckall.
1979
L. Bangs in
Psychotic Reactions
(1987) 283: What have we got! Fuckall!
1984
J. Hughes
Breakfast Club
(final draft screenplay) 139: Brian.
apprehensive
What if he calls my mother?
A satisfied, fuck-all grin spreads across his face
. I’ll trash the bitch.
1994
Loaded
(Sept.) 41/2: My ambition is to go on the
Antiques Roadshow
and say to some old bag, “You’re thinking this old wardrobe is worth a million quid but it’s worth fuck all.”
1994
J. Kelman
How Late it Was
99: Sammy sniffed. There was fuck all to say. He wasnay even angry any longer.
1995
R. Williamson, folk singer, in concert in N.Y.C.: Shut up, Dad, you don’t know fuck-all!
1997
Harper’s
(Feb.) 68: I taught you nothing. I taught you fuck-all.
1997
A. Proulx in
New Yorker
(Oct. 13) 83: But fuck-all has worked the way I wanted.
2002
E. Hartmann
Truth About Fire
vi. 52: The local police aren’t doing fuck-all about the investigation. Another dead Injun, what’s the big deal.
2006
G. Malkani
Londonstani
ix. 100: There were other people with fuck all to do with the fight out by the track that afternoon.

2
. hell (as an expletive).

1938
E. Hemingway in
Selected Letters
(1981) 466: It’s been a fuckall of a six weeks. Nobody’s got any social standing at all now who hasn’t swum the Ebro at least once.
1958
L. F. Cooley
Run for Home
138 [refers to 1920s]: Who the fuck-all does he think he is?

3
. a damn; a fuck.

1958
L. F. Cooley
Run for Home
20 [refers to 1920s]: I don’t give a fuckall what you think!
1998
P. Biskind
Easy Riders, Raging Bulls
177: We didn’t give a fuck-all; we’d let anybody have a screening.
2007
L. Kleypas
Sugar Daddy
400: Honey, I don’t give a fuck-all if you believe me or not.

fuck-all
adverb

utterly; at all; absolutely.

1961
G. Forbes
Goodbye to Some
169 [refers to WWII]: Nothin’. Absolutely fuckall nothin’.
1961
E. Hemingway
Islands in the Stream
336: I feel fuck-all discouraged about things sometimes.
1961
E. Hemingway
Islands in the Stream
400: But I am not going to put Willie and Ara and Henry into one of those burp-gun massacres in the mangroves for fuck-all nothing.
1975
N. Dickens
Jack Nicholson
122: She was a guest of the company and we didn’t have to do fuck-all anything for her.
1991
O. Stone & Z. Sklar
JFK
(film): Don’t matter fuck-all.
1992
J. Wolcott in
Vanity Fair
(Sept.) 301: The flatulent influence of Foucault on sex, about which Foucault…knew fuck-all nothing.
1997
Esquire
May 64/1: Darrell Miers, big as a Buick with loose steering, possesses the fuck-all equanimity of a bail bondsman.
2005
J. Walter
Citizen Vince
177: You think the job is a certain thing and you can just go along, fuck-all blind.

fuck-all
interjection

=
FUCK
,
interjection
, definition 1.

1918
Noyes
Slang Manuscript
(unpaged):
Fuck-all
…(2) Also used as an expression of disgust. “Oh fuck-all!”
1963
H. S. Thompson
Letter
(Nov. 22) in
Proud Highway
(1997) 418: It hardly matters what you believe as long as you’re on top, and laughing. Fuck all.
1966
F. Reynolds & M. McClure
Freewheelin Frank
29: FUCK ALL! I GOT THE CLAP.
1993
G. F. Newman
Law & Order
2: I mean, what can you do about it anyway?… I mean, fuckall, they come back and nick you, can you? You can get up in court and scream about them fitting you.… But you’re up the steps before a wrong sort of judge, you see what good it does you.
2000–01
Ploughshares
(Winter) 174: Her voice is so slight, so worried-like, that, well, fuckall, I feel leaky, wrinkled, like an old birthday balloon.

fuck almighty
interjection

(used to express extreme pleasure, distress, disbelief, etc.;
FUCK
interjection
).

1977
M. Scott
Threeway Team
101: Fuck…shit, I’m coming! I’m coming, Don! Oh holy fuck almighty!
1985
S. Saladino
Erebus
7: “Fuck almighty,” Jay yelled, eyes bulging, a grin across his face.
1993
T. King
One on One
134: Two bodies flow and change and rise to meet each other, harder here, softer there, opening up and enclosing, tightening and releasing. So close. So close. Almost there. Oh Fuck Almighty.
2006
I. Welsh
Bedroom Secrets of Master Chefs
289: Jesus fuck almighty…I get a big shock as a stunningly beautiful girl of about nineteen, twenty, appears before me.

fuckaround
noun

contemptuous treatment; a disappointing situation. Also: a worthless person.

1965
H.S. Thompson
Letter
(Apr. 18) in
Proud Highway
(1997) 509: My good time badass fuckaround is going out of style.
1970
in H.S. Thompson
Great Shark Hunt
101: Well, to hell with it. You don’t need publicity and I sure as hell don’t need this kind of fuckaround.
1972
in H.S. Thompson
Great Shark Hunt
123: A gig that was a…fuckaround from start to finish.
1980
P. Conroy
Lords of Discipline
394: This is the last night we’re going to play fuck-around with that bunch.
1987
J. Ferrandino
Firefight
39: I’ll teach
you to play fuck around with me.
1996
D. McCumber
Playing off Rail
245: Just another fuckaround, waiting all night for no action.
1999
T. Corcoran
Gumbo Limbo
213: All these years, Rutledge has been a straight dealer, never a player, never a fuck-around.