The Fallen Woman (A Regency Romance) (18 page)

“Ah… Andrew Lamb! How fortuitous!” She lowered her parasol, which she used to shield her gorgeous face from the sun. “I’ve been so lonely lately! I can’t think of any man I’d want to see more!”

“And I can’t think of a woman I’d rather be with,” he answered, a bit solemnly. Why wasn’t he beside himself with joy at having been approached by three beautiful women in such a short time span? Isn’t this what he wanted? Andrew’s apathy was a crushing blow to his soul.

“I hate being lonely…” Her voice was like butter-coated velvet. “I feel so terrible lately. I know you could fix it, Mr. Lamb. You could fix my loneliness in an instant.”

“Mmm.” He wanted to sound amused, but he wasn’t. He couldn’t even muster false amusement.
What was wrong with him?!

“Would you think less of me if I outright asked you to visit me in my chambers tonight?” Lady Dudley asked. “I know it’s very forward of me, but I can’t help myself. I
need
you.”

“Of course I wouldn’t think less of you, my lady, but--”

She interrupted before he could finish. “You can use the servant’s entrance… no one will see you come in.”

“But I’m afraid I’ll have to decline your invitation.”

She scowled at him beneath her fire-red eyelashes. Judging from the look on her face, his refusal was the last thing she expected. “Why… Andrew! Why would you say such a thing? D-Don’t be silly!”

“As much as the offer tempts me, I’m afraid I won’t be staying in London much longer.”

“Why is that?” she gasped. “Surely you haven’t been in town too long?”

“To tell you the truth, I’ve been in town for less than a day,” he admitted with a sigh. “But I’m afraid there are some… pressing matters which force me to return to Randall Hall.”

* * *

When Andrew returned to Randall Hall, he had such a wild look in his eye, Dubois was almost reluctant to let him in.

“Mr. Lamb? How unexpected to see you back so soon. Should I tell his lordship you’ve returned?”

Andrew thrust his walking stick and hat toward the butler and, without a word, continued on his way. He wasn’t here to see Tristan, or Dubois, or Leona, or anyone but…

“Mary,” he uttered her name when he saw her. She was standing at the top of the grand staircase, making her way toward him. She hadn’t seen him yet.

“Mary.” He said her name louder this time, and their eyes met.

“Oh! Mister… Mister Lamb?!” She started to descend the stairs much more slowly after she saw him. “I thought you went back to London.”

“I did,” he answered. “As soon as I got there, I came back.”

When it started to look like Andrew wasn’t going to move from his spot at the end of the staircase, she crept down the stairs even slower, trying to avoid the moment when they would be standing on the same step “The air in London didn’t agree with you?”

“No, the women in London didn’t agree with me,” he answered swiftly. “They don’t interest me anymore.”

“I’m sorry to hear that, but I don’t think that’s information you should be sharing with me.”

“I think I should share it with you… because it concerns you.”

When she was three stairs above him, Mary stopped.

“It doesn’t concern me in the least.”

“Oh, but it does!” he protested. “I’m not interested in other women because I’m interested in
you
.”

With a roll of her eyes, Mary started down the stairs again. “You should save your breath, Mr. Lamb. I already know how you feel about me, remember? It’s not nice of you to tease me like that.”

He followed her down the steps. “But I’m being completely serious. No matter how many women approached me, I only had you on my mind. And believe me, it surprises me as much as it surprises you!”

“Am I supposed to be flattered by a comment that insinuates your admiration of me is a shock?” she asked. “This admiration which, in all likelihood, is completely false?”

“It’s not false. I really do admire you.”

“But for what reason?” she sighed. “I’m a maid, and I’m not a pretty one. You’ve been very honest about that.”

Andrew reached out and grabbed her arm, stopping her at the bottom on the staircase. “I regret those comments I made, because I no longer think they’re true. You’re almost handsome to me now!”

“
Almost
?” she sighed. “
Handsome
? Are those the half-hearted compliments that make other women swoon for you? If so, I’ll have no choice but to question the sense of upper-class women.”

“You’re so well-spoken, Mary. You’re much more intelligent than I thought you’d be.”

“Everything you’ve said to me is an insult, in some way or another,” she grumbled. “You should watch what you say.”

“But… how is that possible? I wouldn’t insult you! I think very highly of you! I came back to Randall Hall for
you
!”

Mary gently tugged her arm away from him. “If I say anything else, I’m afraid it would sound rude, and I don’t want to lose my position. Let's just leave it at that.”

“Mary…” Andrew moved toward her, and he kept moving toward her until her back was against the wall. When he had her where he wanted her, he boxed her in, with an arm on either side of her head. “You don’t think I’m handsome?”

“Yes. Of course you are. And you’re wasting your time.”

“No… never,” he whispered, his lips just inches away from hers. “To be near you would never be a waste of time.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say, Mr. Lamb. I have no idea what I can say to get you to… go on your way.” Mary took a deep breath. There was a time when his close proximity might have made her weak in the knees. Now that she knew more about him, her wits were in no danger of abandoning her. “You’re a very handsome man…
beautiful
, even. And I confess I was very taken with you when we first met. Any woman would be lucky to have you. There…
now
will you leave me alone? I don’t mean to be rude, but being trapped at the bottom of the stairs is a bit disquieting.”

“I want you to say one more thing.”

She tilted her head. “What?”

“Tell me you’ll be with me.” He was so close she could feel his breath on her forehead. “I want you in my bed.”
Mary ducked under his arm and dashed away from him. “No! Absolutely not!”

Andrew blinked at least a dozen times as he watched her flee. “What? Why? Are you serious?” If she was as resolute as she sounded, it would be the first time he had ever been rejected. Surely
he
wasn’t going to get rejected by a willowy, mousy maid with a funny nose, who always wore her hair in the tightest buns, and showed no signs of ever having a man in her life? The thought was just… preposterous!

“No, I would never share your bed with you, Mr. Lamb,” she scolded him over her shoulder. It didn’t seem right to call him a “mister” when he hadn’t conducted himself like a gentleman. “The fact that you proposed such a thing is unforgivable!”

“Unforgivable… why?” He spoke to himself, because she was no longer around to hear him. Women had thrown themselves at him all his life. Why did the one woman he wanted not want
him
?

And why
did
he want her, Andrew wondered? There was nothing special about her appearance, and she was obviously a spinster. Did he feel sorry for her? Was he intrigued by the challenge in her voice—or the fire in her eyes? Whatever the case, he would have to put more effort into his seduction.

And he would relish every second.

Chapter Twenty One

Leona sat in front of the looking glass as she combed her hair, studying herself closely with each brushstroke. Was it her imagination, or did she have new wrinkles under her eyes? She wondered if they were a symbol of lost youth, which was gone the moment she fell into Lord Wintergreen’s bed. Or maybe it was her innocence she lost? Either way, it had been a long time since she had been with him—nearly three months. If she didn’t hurry, her chances of convincing Tristan she was having his baby would be slim to none. He didn’t seem like the type of man who would be easily fooled.

She liked Tristan. Because she liked him, she hated the idea of fooling him. “Maybe that’s why I hesitate so much,” she said aloud, frowning at her reflection.

Well, she couldn’t hesitate anymore. Leona resolved herself to do one of two things: finish what her father started, or tell her husband the truth.

Her legs were shaking as she rose to her feet; her hands were trembling as she reached for the door. A few minutes later, when she was standing in front of his room, she almost lost her courage. That she managed to knock on his door was nothing short of a miracle.

He came to greet her, looking weary and disheveled. His shirt was open in the front, leaving little of his chest to the imagination. What would it be like to be in his arms, she wondered?

“Can I come in?”

“Oh. of course!” he exclaimed, stepping aside to let her in. “I’m surprised to see you so late.”

“Yes... I…” Leona walked in with slumped shoulders, like she was shrinking beneath his gaze. “I didn’t wake you, did I?”

“No. I was reading.”

“Oh.”

Leona sat on the edge of his bed. A few seconds later, she hopped to her feet again and started pacing around the room.

“You look troubled,” Tristan observed. “Don’t tell me… it isn’t Andrew again, is it?”

“Oh… no! Of course not!” she laughed. “By the way, did he tell you why he returned so soon? Not that I’m complaining.”

“I have no idea why his stay in London was so brief, but I plan to find out,” Tristan said. “More importantly, I plan to find out why you’re walking around my room like you’re chasing a chicken. Something tells me you didn’t come here for exercise.”

“No, not exactly. Um…” Leona tugged the sleeves of her nightgown. She thought about trying a more direct approach, such as stripping off her clothes. She wasn’t sure what method would make her more uncomfortable. “I care for you, Tristan.”

“I care for you, too,” he answered with a smile. His face showed no indication of knowing what his wife wanted. Was he really that dense?

“On the night of our wedding, do you remember what you said to me?” Leona said. “We didn’t consummate the marriage because you wanted me to care for you. Well… I’m telling you… now I
do.
”

Tristan stood in the middle of the room, keeping his eyes on her the entire time. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”

She nodded.

“Then come here.”

Her steps were uncertain as she made her way to Tristan. She was like a toddler, unsteady on her feet.

“Are you sure?” She answered his question with another nod. That gesture of affirmation was enough for Tristan, who put his hands on her shoulders. Very slowly, he started to ease the nightgown off her body, trailing kisses along her bare shoulders as he exposed her skin.

Leona closed her eyes and held her breath. It felt wonderful to have his lips on her body, but at the same time, she felt horrible. She didn’t know whether to hate herself or feel elated. A part of her wanted to giggle. The fact that Tristan wanted to be with her—and ravenously, at that—made her giddy.

He pushed the nightgown further down her arms, and his lips danced across her neck… across her collarbone.

“Kiss me,” Leona whispered, pointing to her lips.

Tristan, who had been crouching to kiss her collar, lifted his head to kiss her lips. He kissed her deeply and passionately. It was a much different kiss than the one they shared after the picnic. When he explored her mouth with his tongue, her knees were in danger in crumbling beneath her.

He brought his lips away from hers, kissing her forehead as he left. He laid both hands on the top of her head, gently stroking her hair. “I want you to know how much I care for you, Leona. I know we haven’t known each other long, but you mean the world to me.”

“Mmm.” She was fighting off tears again. She couldn’t let him see how upset she was! Not this time!

“You mean everything to me,” he whispered, caressing her, sifting his fingers through her silken hair. “I would do anything for you. Your presence is a light in this dreary life of mine.”

“Tristan…”

He reached for her nightgown again. He started to pull it further down, was on the verge of releasing her breasts from their confines, when Leona laid her hand on top of his and pushed it away.

“You’re… stopping me?” Tristan swallowed hard. His mind was in such a frenzied state. Did she have any idea how difficult it was for him to resist the urge to lift her off her feet, throw her on the bed, and ravish her a dozen times? To stop him was almost cruel.

“I can’t…” Leona’s voice was cracking as she spoke. “I can’t… do it.”

Tristan summoned all the strength in his body to force his lips into a smile. He pulled up her nightgown, covering her shoulders. “We don’t have to do it, Leona. I’d wait for you forever… however long that is.”

“Tristan…” Leona wanted to sob. She wanted to scream at the heavens and ask why she was being punished. Why did she have to care for him so much? Why did she have to disappoint him?

“Leona.” Tristan took her hand and gave it a squeeze. “Please don’t be upset. Even if you never want to be with me, I don’t care. Just having you here is enough.”