The First Assistant (20 page)

“Jesus, Lizzie, are you okay? I was just coming up to make sure you weren’t too upset at that bitch’s outburst.” He was examining the road rash on my leg, as I tried to explain, but my hiccuping sobs seemed to

get in the way of polite conversation. “You must have been going damn fast to get that scrape. All for no crusts?”

I started to laugh as the rain continued to drench us both. “My an-kle,” I said half-laughing and half-crying.

Chris took it gently in his hand and looked at it. “Think you broke it, babes. I’m going to call and get Dr. Pen and a golf cart. I can’t take you on my bike. It’s too wet and I wouldn’t want you to fall again and do more damage.” I nodded like a pathetic little girl.

Chris got on his walkie-talkie and within seconds there was a golf cart with Dr. Pen and his black medical bag. Chris lifted me carefully into the back of the golf cart and held me tightly as we bumped along back to base camp.

I wasn’t sure if I was more terrified of my broken ankle or Dr. Pen. He was an ongoing joke on the set. He’d been brought on specially by Fred and was a psychiatrist. Apparently they’d been friends since college and they’d done many an acid trip together in the guise of exploring the hidden depths of the psyche. And now Dr. Pen was a favorite among the movie crowd, as he felt perfectly comfortable prescribing everything from Vicodin to Ambien or any other prescription med one felt the need for. At least I was certain I wouldn’t be feeling any pain.

Twelve

Hollywood is loneliness beside the swimming pool.

—Liv Ullman

They’d rushed me to a local Phuket hospital and Kathy kindly came along to hold my hand. We swapped war stories about nightmare Hollywood nut cases while we waited for the results of the X rays. Thank God she was there to distract me as the one-room hospital with its thatched roof and dirt floor wasn’t very reassuring. I was pleasantly surprised to see they had electricity and even more shocked when they wheeled me into a room with a brand new X-ray machine. The nurse explained that one of the Hollywood studios had donated it. There had been so many accidents on the set of their last movie they’d decided it was cheaper to donate the machine than to send people back and forth by private jet to Bangkok.

I was pleased to see that Hollywood was bringing something positive to the community after all. There was such gross inequity in the lavish lifestyle Emerald and I were living and the poverty all around us. I made a mental note to convince Emerald, if I ever spoke to her again, to do-nate some money to the community to put a floor in the hospital, and maybe a door! At least my tenure as assistant to one of the highest-paid actresses in the world wouldn’t be a total waste after all.

Two hours later we were still waiting. Though they had the machinery, they apparently didn’t have the film. Kathy was on her phone and I was anxiously watching the space where the door should have been for the driver with the X-ray film. I’d counted all the burst blood vessels on my swollen ankle and was moving on to the freckles when Emerald

burst into the room in a flurry of guilty excitement. She came toward me at such speed she ran right into my propped-up ankle. I winced in pain as she covered me with kisses and apologies while Kathy hung up the phone and looked on in amusement.

“I’m so sorry, Lizzie. Please forgive me. I’m a terrible person. You’re my best friend in the whole world. If you hated me I’d die.”

I looked at her face and knew that she genuinely meant every word she’d just said. She was so lost I found it difficult to stay mad at her. Being unable to hold a grudge was a major flaw in my character, but no matter how hard and twisted I felt, I always ended up forgiving everyone in the end. And when she carefully laid a velvet box in my lap I momentarily forgot why I was mad at her in the first place.

“This is just to say sorry and thank you for doing such a good job in the last month. You’ve been a saint.” I didn’t even open the box, just stroked the velvet, let out a big sigh and then handed it back.

“Thanks, Em. But no thanks. I can’t be bought.” Sometimes it was really hard to do the right thing. I couldn’t help but remember what had happened the last time I’d refused diamonds.

But Emerald wasn’t so easily put off. She opened the box for me and took out the most beautiful art deco diamond bracelet I’d ever seen in my life. I saw Kathy involuntarily step forward. Emerald rolled it around in her hand, letting it catch the sunlight.

“Lizzie, you have to take it. It’s a friendship bracelet. And if you don’t accept it, I’ll think you don’t want to be my friend.”

Now, this was twisted logic, but I felt myself caving.

“Em, I will definitely not accept it if you try to manipulate me.” But she could hear the cracks in my resolve. It was clearly bad luck to reject such generosity.

“Okay,” she said with a pout. “Fine. But why do you have to be so cynical? I’m just trying to give you a present. I’ve already said sorry, and you’ve already accepted my apology, so this bracelet is just a reward for work well done.”

“The girl has a point,” Kathy said with a smile as she ripped the bracelet out of Emerald’s hand and caressed it once before snapping it onto my wrist.

But I still wasn’t sure.

“Look. If you had as much cash as I do, you’d buy people diamonds all the time too,” Emerald said with a smile as she played with the bracelet on my wrist. “And if you feel the guilt is too overwhelming or end up hating me, you can give it to charity.”

“Okay,” I said slowly. “City of Hope does do good work. But before I forgive you and then thank you profusely, you have to give a hundred thousand dollars to the hospital.”

Her eyes went wide at the amount, but not as wide as the nurse’s. But then Emerald looked around, as if for the first time, at the uncomfortable bed and chicken running by. She shrugged and then started laughing.

“Okay. I guess I can donate my per diem to a good cause. Actually, I’ll give them two hundred grand and then they can name the hospital af-ter me.” She looked happier than she had in weeks. “Kathy, can you arrange that? Now.”

“Sure, Em, after I make sure Elizabeth is all right, okay?” Emerald turned on Kathy.

“I’m here now. Lizzie doesn’t need you,” she said with such venom that both Kathy and I paled. Emerald noticed and changed her tone. “I’m a nurse, after all, and I just want to make sure I get a chance to make it up to Lizzie. That’s okay with you right, Lizzie?” She turned to me pleadingly. “Just the two of us?”

Kathy raised an eyebrow at me behind Emerald’s back and I gave her an “I guess so” nod.

“Well, it looks like you girls have it handled. I’ll be getting back to the set and work on your donation.” She gave a wave, but Emerald had already forgotten about her. She was too busy trying to convince the nurse to let her give me the shot of painkiller when it was needed.

I had to fight Emerald off for the rest of the afternoon, reminding her again and again that she wasn’t a real nurse but was only
playing
a nurse. She waved off my protests, but luckily the brilliant Thai nurse gave me the injection before Em and I finished our discussion on method acting. When the doctor finally came back with my X rays, I was pleased to hear that nothing was broken. Luckily, I’d escaped with a bad sprain. I’d have to wear an Ace bandage and stay off my feet for the next few weeks, but Emerald didn’t seem to mind. She said she’d get me my own assistant to make life easier.

As Emerald and Tensin bundled me into the car I felt slightly on edge, which was a surprise considering I’d been dosed with painkillers. Maybe they’d only given me a local anesthetic or the dosage was too low. The Thai people were a lot smaller than I was, after all. As we drove along, I remembered Dr. Pen’s promise, and hoped that the extra large bottle of Vicodin would be waiting in my hut. The day’s events had left me wound unusually tight, and I still wanted to enjoy the party tonight. I wondered if taking painkillers and then going to a party would be considered recreational drug use. I reminded myself that I was injured and that they were necessary for medical reasons. I’d never tried Vicodin, but Scott swore by it.

“Lizzie, has Chris called you?” Emerald said innocently enough as we bumped along back to the hotel.

Then it hit me. The anxiety wasn’t related to my ankle but to Emerald. I knew there had to be more to the 180-degree turn in her behavior than just my injury. She seemed oddly ebullient as she chattered on about tonight’s party the entire ride home. Maybe it was simply a case of cabin fever. Emerald had gone from party monster to party pooper. The girl just probably needed a few cocktails and smooch. Obviously, the threesome had sated her overactive libido and now her tanks were empty.

To both Emerald’s and my excitement Dr. Pen had dropped off the Vicodin. I made her swear she wouldn’t take any, but when I hobbled back from the bathroom, she had “thief ” written all over her face. Knowing her penchant for excess, I later counted them to make sure she had only taken one. Three were missing, but that was restraint in Emerald’s book. We ordered champagne and got dressed together. She couldn’t have been more of a delight. We laughed and danced around the villa to Madonna. She even insisted I tell her about Chris and the kiss. The Vicodin was obviously kicking in, since all my anxiety disappeared along with the sharp throb in my ankle. I even confided in her about Luke’s flower delivery. She said that I shouldn’t forgive him so quickly but make him earn it. At the time I liked her thinking, and she seemed to have totally gotten over the Chris thing. We were both dressed for the party and I was feeling no pain. The Vicodin was heaven. I felt completely myself but totally free of all pain and anxiety. No wonder Scott had had to go to Arizona to kick the habit. I popped another pill and off we went.

We were both giggling like excited schoolgirls when we arrived at the crew hotel. I felt like the guest of honor as everybody made a big fuss over my bandaged ankle and crutches. The set designers had done a brilliant job creating a Mexican Fiesta in Thailand. The hope, they said, was that we’d feel a bit less homesick. It was working for me, or maybe that was the pills. There were little red pepper fairy lights strung on every available surface and a bar set up with four blenders and the best tequila money could buy. Emerald and I headed straight for the bar and ordered fresh blended strawberry margaritas. Emerald suddenly grabbed my hand in shock and pointed to the other end of the pool.

“Look, Lizzie, they have me hanging from a tree.”

And true enough, there was an effigy of Emerald hanging from a branch. The likeness was remarkable. But quickly I realized that she wasn’t alone. On various branches and doorframes were life-size dolls of all the lead actors as well as Ken, Kathy, and Fred.

“Emerald, they’re piñatas.” I started to laugh, then turned to look at her reaction.

There was no way this wasn’t going to cause a serious temper tantrum.

“You mean they’re going to beat me until candy comes out?” Emerald said, stupefied.

“It looks like it.” I was biting my lip so hard, trying to hold back the laughter, that I think I could taste a bit of blood on my tongue.

“Oh. So basically it’s just a reenactment of my life,” she said drily. Emerald never failed to surprise me. Which was why I was still standing there by her side sipping margaritas and wasn’t back in LA sorting out my future.

She turned to me with a wicked glint in her eyes. “I’d love to take a shot at the Carmen piñata. Think anyone would notice if I was the first to have a whack?”

“Nope. But I think if you waited for the girl with the tequila holster and canastas to finish her rounds, you might get some people to join you.” Emerald nodded her head in agreement as we watched the scantily clad Thai girl in hot pants and a shooters holster pour tequila down a

gaffer’s throat.

We propped up the bar chatting with the wardrobe assistant and the head painter and drained two more cocktails. I probably should have read the warning label on my industrial-strength bottle of Vicodin, but I pretty much knew what it said—
no alcohol.
But it was a party, and Emerald and I both really needed to have a good time.

Emerald took off with the script supervisor to go and try to break Carmen, the piñata that is, and I found myself a chair a bit out of the way. Just as the waiter delivered a fresh drink, Chris appeared by my side. He was clean-shaven and his thick black hair was still wet. His tan was set against a white oxford and he looked the picture of surfer-boy good looks.

“It took you long enough,” I said.

“I was waiting for Emerald to leave. I didn’t want to cause you any more problems.” He nodded toward my foot. “In the end I had to bribe the script supervisor to distract her.” He noticed the diamond bracelet on my wrist. “Looks like you guys made up anyway.” I blushed, hating Chris to think I was that kind of girl.

“I’m going to donate it to charity when I get home,” I explained feebly. “I wish I could buy you diamonds,” he said wistfully. I couldn’t quite believe what I was hearing. He was obviously feeling an even stronger connection than I was. A little thrill ran through my body as Chris pulled up a chair next to mine. Thoughts of Luke flitted through my head, but I dismissed them and focused on Emerald beating the shit

out of the paper Carmen.

Carmen had just arrived and had taken no time grabbing a bat and was now going after the Emerald piñata. Both girls were sweating and the party had divided into two different camps cheering the girls on. I think I even saw someone taking odds. The poor Thai staff looked terrified. I imagined that beating effigies was probably not something Buddha encouraged. But the substances coursing through my veins were giving me an overall feeling of well-being, so when Chris hooked his foot under my chair and pulled me close, nothing around me seemed to matter much.

“Do you want to tell me where it hurts?” he whispered in my ear.

I touched my lips and he kissed me softly. Then I touched my head

and he leaned over and kissed that too. Just as I was about to point to something too obscene to mention, Emerald came waltzing over with an entire armload of candy.