The Fix Up (First Impressions #1) (11 page)

Ben felt the first spasm grip him and he groaned, hoping like hell they were the only ones in the building. Her eyes flew open, those pale orbs locking with his as the pleasure knocked him back on his heels. His fingers tangled in her hair as the next wave hit him, then another and another and another until he was mindless and spent and so full of pleasure he couldn’t see straight. He let his eyes close as Holly slowed to a gentle rhythm.

When he finally opened his eyes, she was grinning up at him. “Well,” she said, wiping the back of her hand against the corner of her mouth. “I’d say you aced your first round of public speaking class. Well done.”

“Jesus Christ.” Ben shook his head, then unwound his fingers from her hair and held out his palm. She placed her hand in his, and he lifted her to her feet so he could cradle her against his body. “That was fucking amazing.”

“Tsk-tsk,” she said, squeezing him tight as she breathed against the front of his shirt. “No cursing in a presentation. The audience will find you crass and unimaginative.”

“Fuck the audience.”

Holly grinned. “You kinda just did.”

L
ucky for Ben, the real audience was every bit as receptive as Holly had been, though perhaps not in quite the same way.

“Great job, Ben,” said the Kleinberger CEO as he made his way out of the boardroom on Friday afternoon. “You really killed it in there.”

“I loved the insight into all the engineering innovations you’ve got going here at Langley,” the CFO added. “I was fascinated by the details of stimulated emissions.”

“Thanks,” Ben said, his brain flashing on an image of Holly writhing at the conference table. “We did a lot of hands-on work with that.”

“Yeah,” Ben’s dad said, clapping him on the shoulder hard enough to knock him sideways if he hadn’t been braced for it, but he was, and his dad’s hand seemed to bounce off his shoulder. “Too bad you forgot to mention the fact that we can put a copper finish on that tank so it matches their other equipment.”

“I didn’t forget, Dad, I just chose not to use it. My presentation, my bullet points.”

“Well I say you did an outstanding job.” Kleinberger’s VP of cost analysis smiled at him. “You’ll have our decision soon.”

The executive team filed out of the room one by one, chattering amongst themselves as they went. The instant the door closed behind the last three-piece suit, Lyle turned to Ben.

“That wasn’t too bad, boy.”

“Thanks,” Ben said. It wasn’t the most enthusiastic praise he’d ever received, though it might have been the best he’d gotten from his dad. How many chess trophies had been brought home, or academic scholarships had he won without his dad uttering a single word of approval?

“Won’t do you much good when it’s time to run the company,”
his dad had said so often that Ben stopped bringing home awards from the science fair.

Now, his father was staring at him with something that almost looked like approval. “You want to go grab a drink and celebrate?” Lyle asked.

Ben hesitated. He almost said no, but something about his father’s expression told him this was one of those rare opportunities for father/son bonding that he shouldn’t pass up. “Sure. Just let me shut down my office. Want to meet across the street at Bailey’s in ten minutes?”

“I’ll grab a booth at the back.”

Ben nodded and hustled back to his office, pulling his phone out of his pocket as he went. He set it on his desk and went through the motions of shutting down his computer, grabbing his jacket, waiting impatiently for his phone to power on.

He hadn’t talked to Holly all week, not since she’d walked him to the door after the mother of all speech coaching sessions.

“Thanks for coming by, Ben,” she’d said as she hesitated at the front door of First Impressions, all business once they had their clothes back on. Her hair had even been tucked back up in its neat little bun, and Ben had ached to undo it again. “I hope the speech coaching was helpful.”

“Helpful doesn’t even begin to describe what just happened in there.”

She’d smiled and blushed and looked down at her hands. “I guess I got a little carried away.”

“You can get carried away anytime with me.”

She’d sighed and looked up at him again, her expression troubled. “Look, Ben—”

“I know, I know—you’re going to tell me you don’t normally do this and that it can’t happen again?”

“Right. Something like that.” She bit her lip. “I’ve just got a lot going on in my life right now. I really need to focus on my career and revenue and—well, business.”

“Business,” Ben repeated. “We’re on the same page there. At the moment, I need to be eating, sleeping, and dreaming of nothing but business.”

A dark light had flashed in Holly’s eyes, but Ben wasn’t sure what to make of it. He was still trying to think of something to say when she’d taken a step back from him.

“Let’s just do our best to keep it professional, Ben. It feels like things are sorta even now, right?”

“Even?”

“You know. What happened at your place and then just now—”

“You make it sound like a business merger instead of the best damn blowjob of my life.”

She’d laughed, giving him a playful swat as she stepped away. “Call me if you need any more public speaking tips between now and Friday. I’m sure you’ll do great.”

They were the last words she’d spoken to him, at least for now. He’d done his best not to call her, not even for a last-minute pep talk before the presentation.

But now that the presentation was over, surely it was okay to at least let her know? She was still his PR consultant, after all. There was no reason not to contact her.

He picked up his phone and typed out a quick text message.

Presentation went great. Thanks for all the tips! Couldn’t have done it without you.

Then he shrugged into his jacket and jogged to the elevator, not wanting to keep his dad waiting.

By the time he sat down at the table, Lyle was already halfway through his glass of Laphroig. Ben slid into the booth across from him, not sure whether to be annoyed or grateful his dad had ordered one for him, too.

“Cheers, boy!” Lyle said as he held up his glass. “Let’s hope the Kleinberger team makes the right decision.”

“Cheers,” Ben echoed, and picked up his own glass. He clinked it against his father’s, then took a sip of the smoky brew. God, he’d probably never get used to it. For his father’s sake, he wanted to like it, but he couldn’t help but think he’d rather swill drain cleaner.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, and Ben put his hand on it.

Holly.

His stupid pulse started to gallop, but Ben left his phone where it was. He wasn’t going to be that guy who checked messages while having a conversation with someone else. He owed his dad some undivided attention for at least the time it took to down a glass of Laphroig.

Ben looked down at his glass and scowled. It could be a while.

“Gotta love a good Irish whiskey,” Lyle said. “This is the fifteen-year, of course.”

Ben nodded and looked up at his dad. “Of course.”

“Sure as hell wish they’d get the eighteen-year-old stuff here, or even the twenty-five, but at least it’s not the ten.”

“Thank God for small blessings.”

He took another sip, relieved this one went down a little easier. He wondered if this was how normal fathers and sons interacted. Ben had no idea. His mom had died when he was at the age most boys were getting their driver’s license. Instead, Ben had been heading off to college. He thought he’d been well past the age when he urgently needed a mother’s snuggles or homemade cookies, but he’d craved those things anyway.

Lyle hadn’t been up for any of that, save the stiff, one-armed hug he’d given at the funeral.

“Buck up, boy,” Lyle had told him. “It’s just you and me, now.”

And it had been, for half of Ben’s life.

Ben took another sip of whiskey and looked at his father across the table. “So do you think we’ll get the Kleinberger deal?”

Lyle’s eyes lit up the way they always did when anyone brought up business deals. “Yeah, I think we stand a good chance.”

“And you think the presentation went well?”

Okay, fine, he was fishing. Was it so wrong to want approval from his father? Lyle leaned back against his seat and swirled the smoky liquid in his glass, staring down at it like it held the meaning of life. “It was good. ’Course, there’s something missing.”

“From the presentation? I covered all the bases. I thought the cost analysis was thorough without being overwhelming, and the—”

“No, not all that mumbo jumbo. I’m talking about you as the CEO.”

“What about me?”

“Folks want to see a CEO with a little more charisma. A guy who can get out there and golf with the boys, then charm all the ladies at the company party.”

Ben raised an eyebrow at his father and gripped his glass a little tighter. “Are you suggesting I hire professional escorts to pose as purveyors of my charms?”

“Oh, don’t get all pissy. I’m talking your personal life. In the business world, folks like to follow the lead of a man all the women want. Now’s the time for you to play the field a little, really show the ladies what you’ve got.”

“I see,” Ben said tightly. “And that’s the secret to your success?”

“I have the advantage of being a widower. That’s even better.”

“Being widowed is a business asset?”

“Sure. It shows I’m grounded enough to get married and have a family in the first place, but not tied down by having to spend time with them.”

Ben frowned down at his drink, more than a little annoyed to be lumped together with his dead mother as a professional advantage. Spending time with him or with Ben’s mom had never been a priority for Lyle, not even when Judy was sick as a dog with the chemo.

Part of Ben still blamed his dad for all of that. For the sadness in his mom’s eyes as she sat lonely and waiting for Lyle to come home from a business trip. For the science fairs Lyle never attended because he was off flirting with secretaries. For the missed chance at early diagnosis of the cancer that claimed Judy’s life.

For all of it and then some.

But hell, at least his dad was trying to connect with him on some level now. Maybe that’s what mattered. Maybe learning something from his father was his best shot at becoming the sort of CEO he needed to be to take the company to the next level.

Ben swirled the liquid in his glass, relieved to see there was a lot less of it now than there had been. “If we get the Kleinberger deal, the company would be well-positioned for a potential merger of—”

“How serious are you about that Honey girl?” Lyle asked, snapping his fingers. “The one you brought to the event.”

“Holly?”

“Yeah, that’s the one. Take her, for instance.”

“Take her where?”

Lyle ignored him. “She’s a pretty girl, but not someone you’re planning to have a relationship with, right?”

Ben stared at his father, not sure if he was more annoyed by the old man’s line of questioning, or by the fact that Holly had made it clear she had no interest in a relationship with him.

Why did that bother him so much?

Because you’re starting to fall for her. Because you wouldn’t mind a relationship one bit, but that’s the last thing she wants.

“You’ve gotta play the field, boy,” Lyle said. “That Hayley—”

“Holly.”

“That Holly girl has to be getting up there in years. What is she, thirty?”

“I have no idea. And since when is thirty considered ‘up there?’”

“Women have a clock, boy. They can’t dick around for years building a career the way you and I can. They’ve gotta start squeezing out babies, making a home, all those things women want. And that’s not what you want right now. You’ve gotta sow some oats.”

Ben felt himself bristling at the notion that his father would have any idea what he wanted, much less what Holly wanted.
Especially
Holly. He opened his mouth to protest, but his dad was still talking.

“Holly’s fine for now, but you’ve gotta think bigger picture.”

“Bigger picture,” Ben repeated, not entirely sure he and his father were speaking the same language.

“Now’s not the time to be settling down. Now’s the time for relationships that’ll further your career in the long run.”

Ben put his drink down. Is that what Holly was to him? A stepping stone in his career path?

He stood up, suddenly overcome by a need to talk with her, to prove to himself that’s not how things were. That Holly could be more to him than a surface relationship crafted to get him ahead in the business world.

“Where are you going, boy?”

Ben was already out of his seat with his phone gripped in his hand. “I think I need to call someone.”

“Is this someone who can get us ahead with the Kleinberger guys?”

“I suppose so.”

His dad beamed his approval. “Then get to it.”

Chapter Ten

“S
o let me get this straight,” Miriam said, stretching her long legs out beside Holly’s kitchen table and displaying an impressive pair of red leather Manolo Blahniks. “Ben went down on you at his place, then you sucked him off in our conference room, but you’re totally not breaking your no-sex-with-a-client rule because he hasn’t actually penetrated your vagina with his penis?”

Holly winced and gripped the stem of her wineglass a little tighter. “I know it sounds terrible—”

“No, it sounds like some sort of weird afterschool special.” Miriam took a sip of her own wine, then reached out and put a hand over Holly’s. “Honey, you think maybe you’re trying a little too hard to stick to these weird, arbitrary rules you’ve invented?”

“I don’t know. Hell, I don’t know anything anymore.” Holly shook her head and grabbed a potato chip out of the bowl at the center of the table. “I thought I found commanding and take-charge men a turnoff, and then I dropped to my knees in front of one.”

“Not all take-charge guys are pigs, you know.”

“I don’t even know if Ben
is
a take-charge guy. Maybe I’m bringing out the worst in him.”

“A guy who can get you off with his tongue or get you on your knees with his science vocabulary doesn’t sound like the worst to me.”

Holly sighed and took another sip of wine. “The thing is, I pegged him as more of a beta guy, which I kinda liked after being with an alpha guy for all those years. So why the hell am I turned on by the alpha version of him?”

“Old habits die hard?”

Holly shook her head. “I don’t think so. He couldn’t be more opposite of Chase if they were a different species.”

“Thank God for that. Speaking of King Asshole, what’s the latest from the bank?”

Holly sighed. “Not much. Obviously, I have to complete the job for Ben Langley before we’re paid in full. The first check helped, but it’s not the full amount I need to refinance the loan so it’s solely in my name.”

“And Chase isn’t budging on his timeline?”

“I haven’t been able to reach him. He’s handling everything through his lawyers, just peppering me with legal documents about how I have until the end of next month to either sell or get his name off the loan.”

“Does he know refinancing a loan when it’s underwater is about as likely as the possibility he’ll spontaneously combust?” Miriam’s eyes lit up. “Hey, there’s an idea.”

“I don’t think he cares.” Holly bit her lip. “Miriam, I’m so sorry. I know it seemed like a good idea when we started out to buy the building. Real estate prices were so low, and having my husband co-sign the loan didn’t seem like such a dumb move at the time. If I’d had any idea—”

“Don’t,” Miriam said. “You can’t blame yourself. Hell, I wasn’t in a position to get any sort of loan at all. My credit was in shambles back then or I would have helped. This isn’t anyone’s fault.” She cocked her head to one side. “Well, it might be Chase’s fault a little.”

“God, I can’t believe I married a guy who thought my career was his rival.”

“I wouldn’t have
let
you marry him if he’d acted like that at the start. It wasn’t until he started climbing the corporate ladder at his firm that it all seemed to go to his head.”

Holly nodded as her thoughts strayed to Ben. How would the CEO position change him? Polishing his social skills and confidence was one thing, but were there other things about him that might change?

“So back to Ben,” Miriam said, reading her thoughts. “You said he’s showing signs of being a more take-charge guy?”

“Yes.” Holly pressed her lips together and tried to keep her thoughts professional instead of letting them stray to the other ways Ben could take charge. “I’ve been working with him on it, of course, but honestly, I think just being in a position of power is bringing it out in him.”

“That’s probably not the only position that’s bringing out his inner alpha male.” Miriam grinned. “Who knew hooking up with your client was exactly what you needed to bring out his inner beast?”

“Right,” Holly said, grabbing another chip. “So whatever’s been happening between us is just a technique to take his career to the next level. There’s nothing more to it.”

“You keep telling yourself that.”

“Come on, Miriam. My job is to further this guy’s career. I’m being paid well to do that right now, but there’s sure as hell no future in a relationship with that dynamic. Been there, done that,
divorced
that. End of story.”

“I don’t think that’s it, hon. Maybe there could be more if you wanted it.”

“I don’t want it,” Holly insisted, pretty sure that was true. “I should probably stop falling into bed with the guy, though.”

“Technically, you haven’t fallen into bed with anyone. There’s been a living room floor, a conference room floor—”

“I can’t believe I keep falling onto the floor for this guy.”

Miriam sipped her wine, considering. “That doesn’t have the same ring to it.”

Holly buried her head in her hands, knowing she should probably feel guiltier than she did. She’d get to the guilt in a minute, but right now she couldn’t stop thinking about the feel of him in her mouth, the way he gripped her hair and groaned her name as he came.

“I have to stop this,” she said. “With Chase and the bank breathing down my neck, it’s completely stupid for me to go risking the most lucrative client I have right now.”

“Are you sure Ben’s not becoming more than a client?”

“What do you mean?”

“I see the look in your eye. You’re smitten with the guy.”

“I can’t be.”

“Whatever you say.” Miriam gave her a knowing look, then picked up her wineglass and drained the last of it before glancing at her watch. “Look, sweetie, I have to get home and feed Phuzeei. Not that my cat is more important than your needs right now, but—”

“No, it’s fine. I’ve been whining to you long enough.”

“It’s not whining. It’s never whining when there are orgasms involved.” Miriam stood up and Holly followed suit. “You’ll be fine, hon. Besides, he’s obviously happy with your professional services. Blowjobs aside, he likes what you’re doing for him.”

“I’m glad his presentation went well.”

“And the rest of this rebrand will go well, too. As for the loan—” Miriam trailed off, looking a bit less confident. “Well, if worse comes to worst, we can run the business out of a cardboard box and brand the whole concept as the hot new minimalist trend.”

“Ugh. I’m going to be fretting about it all weekend, you know. Like what if the money doesn’t come through for some reason?”

“Try not to think about it. There’s nothing else you can do right now anyway, and worrying will just make you sick.” Miriam strode toward the door, Prada handbag looped over one arm as Holly followed behind her. “Are you in for the night?”

“I think so. I’m exhausted from all the stress about money. I’m just going to put on some pajamas and crawl into bed.”

Miriam grinned. “Put on the cashmere ones he bought you. Besides being luxurious, they’re probably dripping with his pheromones.”

“There’s a nice mental picture.”

“Good night.” Miriam bent down and gave her a hug. “Have a good weekend.”

Holly hugged back, then closed the door behind Miriam, not feeling a whole lot better than she had when her friend had stopped by an hour ago after the event. Then again, she didn’t feel worse.

She glanced at her phone, wondering if she’d hear from him again. After he’d texted to let her know the presentation had gone well, she’d texted back a brief message congratulating him. She hadn’t heard from him since.

Holly trudged to the bedroom to put on her pajamas. Okay, fine—she put on the ones she’d gotten from Ben. Was that so wrong? They were comfortable, and they were new.

The shirt still smelled like his aftershave, and Holly resisted the urge to hold it up to her nose and breathe in his scent before pulling it over her head. Her whole body did a happy little swoon at the memory of what she’d been doing the last time she’d worn this top.

Outfitted in her comfy attire, she wandered into the kitchen, her mind still drifting to Ben’s presentation. Had her speech coaching tips made a difference for him in the presentation? She hoped she’d managed to impart at least a few helpful hints before getting derailed by chemistry or lust or whatever the hell kept seizing control of her brain and making her do crazy things.

God, why was she taking so many risks lately? Langley Enterprises was a huge client—the biggest First Impressions had ever landed. Between Ben’s rebranding work and the potential for more Langley business, this was her best shot at earning enough to refinance the loan. She was chancing a lot by fooling around with Ben. Jeopardizing her whole career for what?

For a man. You swore you’d never do that.

Holly sighed and yanked open her freezer door, determined to drown her sorrows in something sinfully sweet. She spotted a gallon of vanilla ice cream and thought about the ice cream floats Ben had made the other night.

“Bingo!” she said aloud as she pulled open the fridge to find a liter of strawberry seltzer Miriam had left behind. It wasn’t root beer, but it would do.

She set about making herself a float, wondering what Ben was up to. Was he celebrating? The thought of a celebration that included scantily clad women throwing themselves at a powerful man was enough to deepen her glum mood, so she put an extra big scoop of ice cream in her float.

She’d just shoved the ice cream back in the freezer when her phone rang. She picked it up with the ice cream scoop still clutched in her other hand. “Hello?”

“Hey, Holly. It’s Ben. Open your front door.”

A shudder of excitement ran through her, followed by a shudder of dread. She probably looked like she was having a seizure, which was hardly the condition she wanted to be in for having company. Besides, she was wearing the loungewear he’d bought her. The last thing she needed was Ben thinking she’d been pining away for him in her pajamas.

Then she imagined him standing there on her front porch, and her brain started to cloud with the thrill of spending an evening with him. “You want to come in?”

Her body was already moving toward the front of the house in defiance of her brain’s warning that it wasn’t a good idea. She had the ice cream scoop clutched in one hand and a stupid grin on her face, which she spotted in the mirror on her way to the door.

“I’m not at the door but something else is,” Ben said.

Holly stopped at the door, her hand on the knob. “Okay, this is starting to sound slightly creepy stalkery.”

“I thought you liked creepy stalkery. At least you did when I bought you pajamas.”

“That’s true.” She hesitated, her hand still on the door. “Apparently I’m turned on by creepy stalkers and dirty-talking science geeks. How did I never know this about myself until I hit thirty?”

“You’re thirty?”

“Yes, why?”

“That’s what my dad thought.”

“Why was your dad guessing my age? Never mind, how old are you?”

“Thirty-one. Did you open your door yet?”

“Hang on.” Holly set the ice cream scoop on the entry table and cracked open her front door. Sitting on the front stoop in the beam of her porch light was the biggest arrangement of wildflowers she’d ever seen.

“Ben, they’re beautiful!” Cradling the phone against her ear, she bent down to scoop up the basket. “Oh my God, did you bring these?”

“I had them delivered.”

“They’re gorgeous.” She carried the basket into the house, kicking the door shut behind her. “Thank you.”

“No, thank
you
. Without your coaching, I never could have nailed that presentation today.”

“I was just doing what you hired me to do.”

“You did a little more than that.”

Holly winced as she set the basket on the table, but before she could say anything about the fact that she didn’t usually suck off clients in her boardroom, Ben beat her to it.

“No—uh, I didn’t mean that. Well,
that
was nice, too, but it’s not what I’m talking about. You really lit a fire under me.”

“What?”

“The passion you were talking about making sure I infuse into my presentation. I nailed it.”

She grinned and moved the phone to her other ear, turning the flower arrangement from one side to the other to see which way looked best. “I’m so happy for you.”

“You should have seen me in there. I really took charge, really controlled the room and let my excitement take over.”

“I wish I could have been there.”

“Me, too. And I wish I could see you now.”

Holly bit her lip, wishing she could invite him over. Would it be the worst thing? Maybe they could just—

“No.” She startled herself by speaking aloud, but now that she’d said it, she knew it was the right thing. “I wish we could get together, Ben, but we both know how that would end up.”

“I know. I’m on board with that. Totally in agreement with not seeing each other. That’s why we’re going to have a movie night together.”

Holly clutched the phone tighter. “Did you miss the part where I said it would be a bad idea if we got together?”

“Nope, I heard you loud and clear. And I agree.”

“You do?”

“Yep. Open the card attached to the flowers.”

She hadn’t noticed the card before, but now that she saw it, she realized it was a lot bulkier than a normal envelope. It was square and thick and looked like it held more than a card. “What’s in there?”

“Open it.”

She plucked the envelope out of the sea of daisies and sunflowers, tearing into it with embarrassing enthusiasm. She stared at the packaging for a moment, then laughed. “You bought me a
Star Wars
DVD?”

“It’s the same one I have. The collectors’ edition. So I figure if we both put it in at the same time—”

“We’d avoid the temptation to put something else in.”

Ben laughed. “Pretty much. Are you game?”

“Definitely.”

“Good. Go grab a snack and put your jammies on.”

“Done and done.”

“Yeah? What’s your snack?”

“A strawberries and cream float. I just invented it.”