The Four Horsemen (The Light Series) (9 page)

“When the Lamb opened the
third seal, I heard the third living creature say, "Come and see!" I
looked, and there before me was a black horse! Its rider was holding a pair of scales
in his hand. Then I heard what sounded like a voice among the four living
creatures, saying, "A quart of wheat for a day's wages, and three quarts
of barley for a day's wages, and do not damage the oil and the wine!"

Revelations

We
crawl up the slippery, slime-coated rocks of the English coastline. I look back
at the nixie. They have become lights in the ocean and nothing more. I’m soaked
and frozen. I look at
Wyatt,
“I’ll fly us up. I can’t
scale that wall.”

He
nods, shivering too. I jump into the air, bursting my wings from my back and
fly upward. I flap, lowering, “Grab my foot.”

He
laughs, “I’m fucking cold, Rayne. My fingers are cramping.”

I
nod, “Mine too. Just grab on and we’ll be in a hot shower in like five
minutes.”

I
feel his strong grip attach to my ankle. I flap harder, pushing us up into the
air.

I
struggle against the cold wind and hateful English winter weather.

“Say
something funny. Make me happy. Make me smile.”

“I
have a serious case of blue balls, and the entire swim this damned painting
smacked me in the head.”

I
start to laugh and he becomes lighter. My exhaustion is insane and my feeble
brain decides that his statement, about his balls, is the funniest thing I have
ever heard. I drop him down into the courtyard of the castle and almost fall
into his arms.

He
gives me a pained expression, “You think it’s funny that I’m suffering?”

I
laugh harder, “I’m so-
sor
-sorry.” I can actually
imagine the painting hitting him in the head.

He
carries me to the house. Marie opens the door, “Miss Ellie, you alright?”

I
nod. “My skin is blue and I’m exhausted, but I’m all right. Just cold.” When we
get inside, I moan, “Drafty, stupid castle.”

“RAYNE!”

My
eyes pop open. I step back into Wyatt. He wraps his arms around me.

Stella
comes stomping down the hallway. Her eyes are black and the blue veins she gets
when she feeds are there. She points, “What did you do to Constantine?”

I
shake my head, “Nothing? I had to leave, that’s all.”

She
sneers, “You had to kill my brother?”

My
jaw drops open, “What? Oh my God! Is he…?”

“He
could be.” She grabs my
shoulders,
“He went crazy when
you left. What did you do?”

I
swallow hard, taking a breath. “Oh my God. You scared me.”

Her
eyes narrow and she leans in, looking at my finger where the ring sits. She
whispers, “Oh God, why? Why would you marry him? You have broken my brother’s
heart.” She hovers and I’m scared of what she will do. I shake my head,
“Stella, I had no choice. The dead wanted it, and it was the right choice, I
don’t know why.”

She
steps back, stumbling a little. Her face breaks my heart even more. Her voice
is hollow and emotionless “You have to leave. Take that Mona with you. I can’t
have her here. I almost ate her earlier. You have to leave.” Her eyes dart to
Wyatt and the rage starts, “Take your family and get the FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!”
Her fangs are there and her eyes are black, almost red. Her screams echo and
bring the wind with them. The dead sparkle around me, making a barrier.

She
is trembling and laughing bitterly suddenly, “Would you threaten me with the
dead, Ellie?”

I
shake my head, “Never.” I can feel them there, waiting for me to ask them to
fight. I whisper, “I love you.”

She
rages, “YOU LOVE NO ONE! YOU ARE TRULY THE DAUGHTER OF LUCIFER AND LILLITH!”

Tears
stream my cheeks. I know I’m heartbroken, but I can’t feel it. I am close to
losing my mind. I drop to my knees and grab the dagger I know Maria keeps on
her ankle under her dress. She flinches when I pull it. Stella’s eyes are wide.
I grab the blade, looking Stella in the eyes and turn it. I close my eyes,
tears slipping down my cheeks, and drive the blade into my stomach. I gag and
buckle forward. I cannot scream. I thought it would bring a scream, but it has
stolen my voice. The pain is intense. I sob but it sounds like a sheep. Maria
cries out and I feel Wyatt tense behind me.

I
drop to my knees. Stella is there instantly, at my side. “What are you doing?”

I
shake my head and speak in my sheep voice, “I feel nothing. I have no heart
anymore. I have to feel the betrayal that I have committed and blood is the
only way.” The words are not mine. They are Ellie’s and the others. “I have no
love in my heart.”

With
a trembling hand, she reaches for the blade, pulling it from my stomach. Blood
seeps out, spilling onto the floor.”

She
sobs with me, “Why?”

I
shake my head, “I think I am not meant to feel this time, sister. I think I am
meant to die. In the end, I am still meant to die.”

She
shakes her head, “Don’t leave me again.”

I
curl into her. She looks up at Wyatt who has not moved, not even a little. “You
did this.”

I
shake my head, “It was me.”

She
holds me until the blood stops flowing. Wyatt drops down onto the floor behind
me. His body is no longer cold. It is warm, hot even. He presses against me and
I feel something wet. I reach behind me, touching his wet stomach. When I bring
my hand forward I cry out. My hand is coated in blood.

He
whispers into my neck, “What happens to
you,
happens
to me.”

I
shake my head as more tears fall. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know. I just needed to feel
the pain I have caused.”

Stella
laughs, “You always were so dramatic.” She hugs me to her, but I know she is
looking at Wyatt when she says, “Someone just guaranteed his ass would always
be saved.”

Wyatt
scoffs, “You know nothing about me, fanged devil.”

Stella
laughs, “I’m just relieved you don’t have her sense of humor now.” She gets up,
lifting me with her. Maria is pressed against the wall of the hallway, stunned
and scared. I smile at her, passing her back her dagger. She takes it, shaking
her head and whispering a prayer.

As
we hobble to the great room, I ask softly, “Where did he go?”

She
shakes her head, “I can only assume after the horsemen. He wants this to end so
he can be with you forever.”

My
eyes lift to meet her pained ones, “I don’t have forever, Stella. I have until
I finish.”

She
shakes her head, “How do you know?”

I
shrug, “Just a feeling.”

Wyatt
looks back at me, “You’re wrong.” He wishes I were, but I know he can feel it
too.

Mona
comes running over when we get to the fire, “Where did you guys go?”

I
shake my head, “Boston. Just quick.”

Her
eyes are hopeful. I close my eyes, “I’m sorry.”

Her
hands slip to her mouth, “Oh God.” I wrap my arms around her, holding her to
me. She sobs into my already-wet and stinking over-sized shirt. Wyatt gives me
a look. I hate this. I hate everything. I can’t feel the hate, and I can’t be
angry or sad for my friend. But I know I do. I know I hate it all.

Stella sits on the
couch next to Michelle who looks up and takes her headphones off. “Hey guys!
Where did you go?”

Wyatt speaks in the
same tone he always uses for Michelle, “Boston.”

She nods, “Cool.” She
looks at Stella, “Wanna go for a walk?”

Stella smiles at her,
“No. Constantine told me you were never to leave the castle. No matter what.”
She tilts her head and plays with Michelle’s blonde hair. Michelle frowns,
“Why?”

Wyatt gives her a
disgusted look, “Because you sold your soul to the devil and we don’t want him
tracking you. Constantine puts a guard on his houses. Can’t you feel it in the
air?”

She looks down
instantly, “Oh.”

Mona pulls away from
me and leaves the room. I don’t have what she needs. I don’t have compassion. I
don’t have anything. I am a void, an empty void.

I hear the others
inside of me, muttering and speaking in low tones. They are panicking. They
sense him. I spin, seeing the most tragic thing I have ever seen, walking into
the room. Constantine laughs bitterly, undoing his blue dress shirt. His eyes
land on the ring on my finger. I see hatred burning on his face. His dark hair is
wet from the rain and mist. He looks tragic and beautiful as he crosses the
room to me. I see Wyatt’s eyes on me. Constantine opens his shirt. There on his
chest is my other
name,
Ellie appears just like the
witch said it would. It is exactly like Wyatt’s.

My lips are open but
nothing comes out. I don’t recall it. Ellie is sobbing inside of me. She is
trying to take control and run to him. But I stand there frozen. He turns his
face to Wyatt, “Don’t get too excited. She gets one of these every couple centuries.
It’s less of a big deal to her.”

Ellie’s pain becomes
mine and I feel it. We share the agony. Me and Ellie and the others, we hurt
the same for once.

I can’t look at Wyatt.
I turn and leave the room, following after Mona. I feel the shame and the hurt
and the hatred of myself. I feel it, and though it burns, it is bittersweet. I
am grateful for a feeling.

Mona is on the bed,
curled up in a ball. She is dialing on her cellphone over and over, listening
to her voicemail messages from her mother.
Her mother wishing
her merry Christmas and happy New Year.
Her mother panicking that she
hasn’t heard from her. Her mother wondering if she has found somewhere safe to
go.

Mona is a wreck,
obviously.

She
dials and presses speakerphone.
Her mother’s voice
fills the room. “Oh,
uhm
hi, sweetie. I am so sorry
for everything. I watched the news today and with everything that’s happening,
I’m scared that you are dead. If you get this, please call me. I have prayed
for forgiveness, in case we don’t speak before one of us is gone. I love you.
Stay safe.”

I curl around Mona but
before I can help her, the dead take me.

The dream is instant.
I swear my eyes have only just closed.

“Rayne, where are we?”

I turn to see Mona.
Her eyes are puffy and her face is tired. She looks like she did on the bed.
How is she here? Is she here? “My dream.”

She nods, “Oh.
Creepy.”

I look around. We are
in a blanket of mist. I take her hand in mine and start to walk. It feels like
we are not moving, the mist is so thick.

“Do you think my mom
knows I love her?”

I nod, “She knows.
Willow said she is with God. She is safe.”

“Good.” She sighs, “I
just realized, I need to find my dad.”

My eyes dart at her.
She starts to cry again, “Really? Both of them?”

I nod, “Your dad is
with your mom. He went to her and they were together when they passed.”

She smiles through her
tears, “I guess that’s something. At least they had each other and they weren’t
alone.”

I wrap my arm around
her, “And we have each other.”

She sniffles and
points, “Do you see that?”

I look and there
before us is a huge gate. It is silver with a greenish hint to it. We walk up
to it. It opens slowly, as if a ghost opened it.

Mona takes my hand and
pulls me through. When we are inside, the gate closes again. I hear it click
and the mist clears up. Before us is a massive forest. There are birds,
butterflies, and flowers everywhere. I smile, “This is the garden.”

She takes a deep
breath of the warm air, “It’s sweet.”

I nod. It is like
breathing honey-scented air. It is summer but lusher than any garden I’ve been
in, in the summer.

There is a subtle path
in the long green grass. It doesn’t look like it’s carved out but maybe walked
a lot. We start down it, still holding hands.

“Your mother should be
in here.”

“Yup.”

She looks back at me,
“She might be a total bitch.”

I nod, “Yup.”

She makes a face. I
can feel the dead around me though. They are there, sparkling. The grass
tickles against me. This is the first time someone else has come into my dream,
except my mother and Willow. I hope it doesn’t mean Mona is going to die. My
mom is and Willow is already dead. I can live without Michelle. It’s a terrible
thought, but I know it’s a truth. I can live without Stella. I don’t want to,
but I know in my heart of hearts I can. I can’t live without Mona. She is in my
heart and she has worked her way into the rest of the people inside of me. Mona
is the real sister none of us have ever had. Stella would have turned me away,
had I not demonstrated my love for her with the blade. Mona never would have
abandoned me, no matter what I had done.

She is solid. Her
being in the garden proves she is pure of heart and soul.

And sometimes I catch
myself just staring at her glossy lips, not in a way that means I want to date
her. It’s not totally a lesbian stare; it’s more like how we all agree Ryan
Gosling is hot. Men and women alike agree
,
he is a
sexy man. Mona’s lips are like that. Men and women alike stare. I have seen
them. Not just because she looks so much like Blair from Gossip Girl either.