The Frog Princess (4 page)

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Authors: E. D. Baker

Tags: #Fiction, #Frogs, #Humorous Fiction, #Fairy Tales

BOOK: The Frog Princess
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I certainly didn't intend to remain a frog my entire life, but I needed to live until I could figure out how to go back to my old self. I gagged again and swallowed hard.
Maybe,
I thought,
it would be better if I didn't think
about it. Just do it and get it over with.

"How did you learn what to do?" I asked Frog. "You couldn't have known what a frog does the instant you became one."

"I watched other frogs," Frog said, shrugging. "It's amazing what you can pick up when you're as intelligent and observant as I am. Go ahead, see if you can catch another one."

"Then go away," I told him. "It really is easier if you're not here."

Frog wandered off to catch his own meal while I looked for the juiciest plum. When I found it, I focused on the biggest fly and flicked my tongue again. It uncurled with a soundless snap, missing the fly by inches. I coiled my tongue back into my mouth while the lucky insect buzzed angrily and flew off to another, less dangerous plum. I kept trying, but I didn't catch many flies. My eye-tongue coordination wasn't very good.

Frog's stomach was full long before mine, so he came over to give me tips on improving my aim. He also came over to brag. "You should have seen what I just did!" he said. "I found a really rotten plum so covered with flies that I couldn't see the fruit. It took a while, but I lined it up just right and caught eight flies with one flick of my tongue. Eight at once! Imagine that!"

His bragging was getting on my nerves. "I have a question for you," I said, wanting to change the subject. "It was all right to call you 'Frog' when you were the only frog I knew, but now I'm a frog, too, and it no longer seems right. What should I call you?"

"You could try calling me Eadric."

"You mean you really are Prince Eadric? That wasn't something you said just to get a kiss?"

"I really was Prince Eadric, back when I was human. I'm surprised you hadn't heard of me. I was quite famous, you know. However, now that I'm a frog, I'm just plain Eadric."

"In that case, I'm Emma. Princess Emeralda is much too formal for a frog."

"Huh!" grunted Eadric. "Okay, Emma, then how about trying for that fly over there?" He pointed to an insect buzzing angrily on the ground. "Even you can catch him. I think his wing is damaged."

I ignored his suggestion, as I wanted to tell him about my idea, one I'd come up with while I stalked my flies. "I've figured out how we can get out of this mess. All we have to do is go to my castle and wait for my aunt Grassina to get home. I don't know how long she'll be gone, so we may have to wait a while, but I'm sure she'll help us as soon as she gets back."

"It's not that easy," he said as if he were talking to a simpleton.

I tried not to let him provoke me, not after he'd been trying so hard to be helpful. "Sure it is," I said. "She's a very knowledgeable witch. I'm sure she'll know what to do."

"That's not what I mean. In the first place, waiting around a castle would be an invitation for disaster. Frogs aren't exactly welcome on castle grounds. Don't you think I would have gone home if I could have? I've seen too many frogs tortured by dogs, cats, and bored under-gardeners. It's something I'd rather not experience, thank you very much! And although I don't really know all that much about magic, even I understand that one witch can't undo spells cast by another. In fact, adding a second witch's magic would only make the spell that much harder to undo. Your aunt wouldn't be the one to see. We'd have to go to the witch who cast the spell in the first place. In cases like this, it's always best to go to the source."

"Then let's go see her!"

"I don't know where she lives."

"You aren't very encouraging," I said, trying not to show how discouraged I actually felt. "Maybe Grassina could help us find her—"

"Hold it right there. Didn't you hear a word I just said? I don't want to sit around your castle waiting for your aunt to show up! Anyway, I
am not
going to go talk to any strange witch. How do I know she won't cast another spell on me?"

"My aunt wouldn't do anything like that."

"Really? Then tell me, has she ever turned anyone into a frog? Be honest now."

"Well, yes, but—"

"Ah-hah! And you wanted me to go see her! It'll be a cold day in the swamp before I go see another spell-casting witch!"

"But she's not—"

"Forget it!" Eadric said, turning his back to me. "There's nothing you can say that would change my mind."

I sighed. I'd met stubborn people before, but none of them had been as aggravating as this frog!

"So what do we do now?" I asked, thinking fondly of my aunt Grassina's rooms, where I often headed at the end of the day.

"Let's go back to my pad," said Eadric. "I want to show you my collection."

"Your collection?" I wondered what a frog could possibly collect.

"My dragonfly wings, remember?"

"Oh, right," I said. He was the strangest prince I'd ever met. Of course, if I were to remain a frog for as long as he had, I might seem awfully strange, too. The thought was depressing, considering how many people already regarded me as odd. There was only one solution: I was going to have to get myself turned back as quickly as possible.

Six

D
aylight was fading as Eadric escorted me to his lily pad, which was tucked in a quiet backwater of the stream. It was a large, smooth pad, floating near the overhanging branches of a weeping willow. I tried to climb onto it, but it kept sagging under me, dumping me back into the water. After I'd tried three or four times, Eadric got impatient and shoved me onto it from behind. He pushed me so hard that I skidded across the pad, nearly sliding off the other side. When I tried to climb to my feet, the lousy thing dipped and swayed and I slipped helplessly.

"Isn't it great!" enthused Eadric as he strode to the middle of his pad. "That willow is so close that some days I don't even have to go anywhere to eat. It's almost always full of bugs and I can catch them without even trying. I can even do it lying down. See that spider dangling from the end of that leaf? Watch this!" Stretching out on his side, Eadric rested his chin in his hand and flicked out his tongue, plucking the spider from the leaf like an expert.

"How convenient," I said, certain that he couldn't get any lazier.

Nee deep! Nee deep!
We were interrupted by deep voices sounding from the undergrowth lining the stream bank.
Pa reep! Pa reep!
Higher-pitched voices from among the trees joined in the chorus.

"What is that?" I asked.

"Just some of my friends. They have concerts every night this time of year, as long as the weather is nice."

"You have friends among the common frogs? I'm happy to hear that you're not a snob like Jorge!"

Eadric scowled at me and shook his head. "There is no royalty in the animal kingdom. All frogs are created equal. My friends are a great bunch of guys. I'll introduce you to them after the concert. Let's go. I know where we can get good seats if we hurry."

We slipped off the lily pad into the water and swam side by side to the soft mud of the stream bank. Frogs of every size had already begun to gather at the edge of the water. "That's Bassey over there," Eadric said, pointing to a large frog whose deep voice resonated throughout the crowd. "And that little guy is Peepers. He's a soprano." The little frog saw Eadric and waved from his vantage point on a tree.

Eadric led me to a soft patch of grass, picking his way between the frogs who had already taken their seats. A few frogs greeted us while others smiled their welcome, making me feel comfortable from the start.

"This is nice," I said, settling down beside Eadric.

He bent down and spoke directly into my eardrum. "I'm glad you like it. So how about a kiss now?"

"Eadric!" I said so loudly that everyone turned to stare. There'd been a pause in the music, making my voice sound that much louder. Embarrassed, I waited until the music resumed. "I can't kiss you now! All your friends are watching!"

"It's all right," he said. "We'll close our eyes."

"No, thank you. I don't want to take any chances. No more kisses until we know why the first one went wrong!" I was too loud again, and the frogs seated closest to us turned around to shush me. Covering my face with my hands, I shrank into my seat, almost wishing we hadn't come.

More frogs arrived, joining in the chorus. I was surprised when Eadric began to sing, too. I liked his voice, which wasn't as deep as Bassey's or as high as Peeper's. /
could listen to this all night,
I thought, closing my eyes. The warm evening breeze felt good on my skin. The music was so beautiful that it gave me chills down my spine and frog bumps on my arms.

Nee deep, nee deep!
sang the big frogs like Bassey.
Pa
reep, pa reep!
sang the tiny frogs like Peepers.
Barbidy,
barbidy!
sang Eadric. I was nodding my head in time to the music when suddenly the night grew silent and I opened my eyes to see why. A grass snake as long as a human man's arm slithered out of the weeds edging the stream. Before anyone could move, the snake struck, sinking its fangs into a member of the audience. The poor frog was halfway down the snake's gullet in an instant. Its twitching legs stuck out of the snake's mouth, kicking and jerking as if the frog could still hop away and escape. It was horrible! I screamed and the snake swiveled its head to look directly into my eyes.

"Come on!" urged Eadric, squeezing my arm to get my attention. Mesmerized by the snake's eyes, I couldn't move. "I said, come on!" Eadric shouted again, yanking my arm until I turned away. "Jump!" he yelled as the snake slithered toward me.

I jumped, landing on the back of an old frog crawling through the shallow water. "Sorry!" I said. "I didn't

mean—"

"Hurry up!" shouted Eadric, from the middle of the stream. "You don't have time to apologize!"

"Sorry!" I said again, and pushed off from a slippery rock, sailing into the air and landing far out in the stream. "I can't do this!" I screamed, spluttering as I got a mouthful of water. "I can't live this way!"

"Don't think, swim!" he shouted, pulling me.

With Eadric at my side, I scissor-kicked as fast as I could until I was too tired to kick any longer. Eadric found a place to hide in a mud bank far downstream. Guiding me to the hole, he helped me climb inside.

I was terrified and couldn't stop shaking. Eadric patted my back consolingly. "It's all right," he said. "That snake can't find us here."

"But there are other snakes!" I whispered, my throat tight with fear. "Sooner or later one is going to get us! I can't live like this, Eadric. I was never afraid that I would be eaten when I was a princess. You must know someone who can help us!"

"There is one possibility," Eadric said reluctantly. "It's sort of a last resort, but we can try it if you really want to."

"What are you talking about?"

"We can go see the old witch who turned me into a frog. I don't know where she lives, but each month on the night of the full moon she goes to a certain spot to collect plants—or at least she used to. The full moon is only two nights away. We can reach it in time if we leave in the morning."

"Do you really think she'd help us?"

"She might. She said I just needed to be kissed by a princess to become a prince again. You're a princess and you kissed me, so why am I still a frog? The old witch cast the spell, so she's responsible for making sure it works. She should know how to fix it."

"Why didn't you tell me about this before? You knew I didn't want to be a frog!"

"Because it's risky. There's no telling if she'll help or not or even if she'll be there. Besides," he said, blushing a dark green, "if I have to remain a frog, it's kind of nice having another frog around who once was a human. I enjoy your company. But," he added briskly, "we'll do it if you really want to."

"Oh, believe me, I do! I don't think I could stand being a frog for much longer!"

I didn't know what to think of Eadric's confession. He could be rude and obnoxious, but underneath it all he was a nice frog and I liked him. Even so ... I went to sleep that night thinking about Eadric. Considerate and helpful, he treated me as if I were an important person worthy of his attention. And it was much more pleasant to think about him than it was to think about that horrid snake and the poor little frog that had been eaten.

I'd been asleep only a short time when something woke me. I looked around, but nothing had changed inside the hole and Eadric was snoring peacefully beside me. Then it came again, the mournful sound of a dog howling in the distance. Instead of frightening me, I felt sorry for the beast, since I felt like howling myself.
But it's
luckier than I am,
I thought.
At least it doesn't have to worry
about being eaten.
I shivered and moved closer to Eadric, safe for the moment in our muddy sanctuary.

Seven

E
adric and I woke long before the sun was up the next morning. Even though I wasn't hungry, Eadric insisted that we have our breakfast before setting out. It was still dark and there were plenty of mosquitoes around. I was surprised when I tasted my first one. It was salty, but extremely filling for such a skinny insect.

"We'll be traveling over land for the first part of our trip," explained Eadric between mosquitoes. "We'll be safe enough as long as we follow some rules. One, don't make any unnecessary noise. Two, eat while you hop—we're on a tight schedule. Three, keep your eyes and eardrums open at all times. If you hear anything suspicious, don't talk. Just signal me like this." Eadric flapped his arm and patted his head. "That should get my attention."

"Yours and that of every other creature around," I said. "What if I tap you on the shoulder instead?"

"Fine," Eadric said, nodding. "That should work, too."

Our trip began over swampy ground, but as the sun rose overhead, we reached higher, drier land. I stopped to admire a bedraggled patch of dandelions, having had little contact with flowers other than the crystalline blossoms in Grassina's room. Ordinary flowers were banned from the castle because both my mother and my aunt were allergic to them.

I continued on when Eadric harrumphed impatiently, and we soon found ourselves hopping across pebbled earth where little seemed to grow. It made us both nervous, for the rocky soil and occasional scraggly weeds gave us nothing to hide behind if a predator should come along. Eadric and I hurried across the open ground, anxious to reach the tall grass beyond it. Suddenly, a ladybug zipped past my nose and flew toward a short, squat rock. I remembered Eadric's advice to eat while we hopped and tried to do just that. I jumped, flicking out my tongue at the same time, but the target was smaller than I was used to and I missed, my tongue coming back empty. Since I'd been concentrating on my tongue, I hadn't been paying attention to my feet, so I tripped and fell flat on my face.
Thppt!
Someone else's tongue flicked out and caught the ladybug.

"Better luck next time," said a gravelly voice. I stared in disbelief. What looked like a rock blinked and shifted a lumpy foot.

"You're a toad!" I exclaimed, startled.

"And you're a lousy jumper!" replied the toad. "Just how old are you, anyway?"

"What does that have to do with anything?" I asked.

"I haven't seen such lousy jumping since my tadpoles first got their legs!" replied the toad. "You're going to have to work on your coordination if you're going to catch anything."

"She's been a frog only for a few days," said Eadric.

"What was she before that?" asked the toad.

"I can speak for myself, thank you." I said. "I was a princess!"

"That explains it. Never have seen a princess who could jump worth grasshopper spit. Whoa!" said the toad, looking behind me. "Look out, little lady. Here comes a big one."

I turned around, expecting to see a large insect. Instead, the same huge white dog that had once tried to eat me was trotting straight toward us. I couldn't take my eyes off it.

"You might want to sidle on out of the way," suggested the toad. "I can handle this one."

I scurried behind a scraggly clump of grass while the toad hopped boldly into the open. After one look at my face, the toad laughed. "Don't worry, little lady, I know how to take care of myself. Watch this!"

Three more hops set the toad directly in the dog's path. The dog's eyes lit up. "Hmmm!" it said, snuffling the toad from front to back before closing its great jaws around the lumpy, gray body. A strange look came over the dog's face and it dropped the toad as if it were hot. White foam dripped from between the dog's jaws. Whimpering pitifully, it pawed at its mouth.

"Yuck!" said the dog. "What
is
this stuff?" It shook its head and great flecks of foam splattered the dry soil. With a pained yelp, the dog ran back the way it had come.

"You poor thing! Are you all right?" I asked the toad.

"Fine as frog's hair. Thanks for asking."

"What did you do?" I asked. "I thought it had you!"

"Not me! Mother Nature gave us toads a little secret weapon." The toad lowered his voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "You frogs think you're so superior with your smooth skin and your pretty faces, but you don't have anything like this. You see back here behind my head? This gooey stuff isn't dog spit, no sirree! I make my own poison and I've been told it tastes downright nasty. Heh, heh, heh! That dog didn't stand a chance."

"That poison ... He isn't seriously hurt, is he?"

"Nah, nothing time won't cure. Might have learned a lesson, though, if he's lucky."

"I never would have guessed that you could do that."

"That's what makes it a secret weapon!" the toad said. He beamed at me before turning to Eadric. Eadric scowled back.

"We'd better be going," I said. "Thanks for your help!"

"My pleasure, little lady. Good luck with your hopping! Keep on practicing and you'll do just fine."

Eadric and I continued on, neither of us saying another word until we were concealed by a tall, rippling sea of grass. Once we were in its shade, I breathed a sigh of relief. "Now what was that all about?" I asked Eadric. "I think this was the first time I've seen you looking angry."

"He didn't have to do that!" grumbled Eadric.

"What do you mean?" I asked. "Who didn't have to do what?"

"That old toad. He didn't have to show off like that! Who does he think he is, your knight in warty armor? If anybody is going to rescue you, it will be me! We didn't need him! If he hadn't interfered, I would have done something about that dog."

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Something would have occurred to me, I'm sure. But I didn't need some old toad to protect you like that. Interfering old busybody!"

"Eadric, he was just trying to be helpful."

"We didn't need his help! Look at me! I'm big! I'm strong! I'm a superior example of froghood and capable of protecting us both!"

I gave up. From the furious scowl on Eadric's face, I was better off not saying anything.

Intent on maneuvering through the dense grass, I ignored my companion. Because there were few clear areas that allowed straightforward hopping, I had to develop my own crawl-hop-wiggle style that got me through the grass but left my muscles aching.

The stars were twinkling overhead when Eadric and I finally reached the edge of the grassy field and took shelter under a flowering thornbush.

The next morning, we entered a trembling copse of young saplings and heard the distant murmur of rushing water. With the sound as our guide, we detoured around boulders and old stumps, breathing a sigh of relief when the tangled underbrush bordering the stream came into sight. We had been out of the water for so long that my throat was parched and my skin was beginning to feel like old leather. Working my way through the maze of stems and branches, I leaped into the clear, sun-sparkled water only seconds ahead of Eadric.

The swim was easy and relaxing, because we were heading downstream. I swam beside Eadric, kicking now and then but mostly letting the current do the work. Around midday, fat black clouds gathered overhead. Rain peppered the water, landing on my head in oversized, heavy drops.
A little more water won't hurt us,
I thought, but at the first crack of thunder, I began to feel uneasy.

"How much farther is it?" I asked Eadric, who had been single-mindedly looking for landmarks.

"We're closer than I thought. Do you see that old oak over there?" Eadric pointed to a tree on the far side of the stream. "I tied my horse to the lowest branch the night I was turned into a frog. I wonder what became of him. His name was Bright Country and he was the best horse I'd ever had. I'd hate to think that something bad happened to the old fellow."

"I'm sure someone found him or he got himself loose. I don't see any old horse bones lying there. But why did you come here? You've never told me the story."

"It was no epic tale, believe me. I thought I was in love with a princess and hoped to win her favor by giving her some meadwort. I'd heard that if you picked it at midnight on the night of the full moon, then boiled the leaves, you could see your true love's face in the bottom of your cup. I was convinced that I was her true love and that it was my face she'd see."

"I've never heard so much garbage! Meadwort doesn't do anything like that. Who told you that it did?"

"My little brother," Eadric admitted.

"And you believed him? I don't know much about little brothers, but from what I've heard they are not the most reliable sources of information. It sounds like he pulled one over on you."

"I guess so."

Eadric's face looked so forlorn that I took pity on him. "I'm sure he wouldn't have done it if he'd known how it would end."

"Probably not," admitted Eadric. "He isn't a bad sort."

"I didn't know you were a romantic at heart."

"Romantic! Is that what you call it? I thought I was just having a run of bad luck. The really sad part is that a few months after I became a frog, I saw the princess. Her coach almost ran over me when I was crossing the road. It was decorated for a wedding, so it must have been her wedding day. My rival won by default, I guess. She'd been seeing a lot of him while I'd still been a human. That's why I'd even considered my brother's advice. I was getting desperate."

"You didn't finish your story. What happened when you came looking for the meadwort?"

"I never found it, but I did come across the old witch. She was out looking for plants that night, too. I stumbled across her in the dark, which was pretty unpleasant, believe me. She was wearing a filthy gown and smelled terrible. That's when I made a comment about her clothes and hygiene. She took offense and wham! The prince became a frog!"

"So how much farther is it?"

"It's right there," said Eadric. "We can wait under that blackberry bush. That's where I spent my first night as a frog. If there are any rotten berries on the ground, we should find plenty of insects."

Eadric and I climbed out of the water and made ourselves comfortable under the blackberry bush. To our disappointment, we found neither berries nor insects, although the leaves kept the cold rain off us. It had been a long, tiring trip and we hadn't slept well in days. With the soothing patter of rain on the leaves, it wasn't long before we were both asleep.

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