The Game Changer (18 page)

“Why was it different with Cameron then?”

“I don’t know,” Olivia said, opening her eyes and meeting Melody’s gaze. “There’s just something about him. When he came up to us on the dance floor, he just seemed different than all the other guys who hit on me. This is probably going to sound stupid and cheesy, but when he looked at me, I felt like he
saw
me. Really saw me, the person underneath the designer clothes and makeup and all the other stuff I hide the real me under.”

Olivia’s words made Melody’s heart ache. She knew the real Olivia, always had, but she was one of the very few who did. Not many people knew that beneath that beautiful face and seemingly confident demeanor was a woman who had abandonment and self-worth issues.

“Then last night when we got to his place and he didn’t want to have sex, I felt…relieved, I guess,” Olivia admitted, her expression bemused. “I don’t know why. I just felt like I didn’t have to pretend with him because he saw who I really was. We talked for hours, Melody. I’ve never been able to talk to anyone like that except for you, and I never thought I’d
want
to.”

Melody had always hoped this would happen, but as the years passed she’d become more and more doubtful. She expected Olivia to fight it the way she always had, claiming she wasn’t interested in anything more than sex.
Cameron must really be something special
, she thought.

“So what now?” Melody asked.

“We’re going to date,” Olivia said, laughing delightedly. “Can you believe it?
Me
dating? I told him I wasn’t looking for a relationship, but he said maybe I’d change my mind, and he asked me to give him a chance.” She shook her head and stared across the room, her eyes dreamy and far away. “Part of me wanted to say no, but I just couldn’t. I’ve been making all these changes in my life, so it felt like a sign to meet Cameron right now, you know?”

Melody nodded. “I like seeing you like this,” she said, and Olivia regarded her quizzically. “Hopeful,” she clarified. “Excited about a guy.”

“It’s been a long time,” Olivia said. “You know I’ve never been the type of girl who waits around for a guy to fulfill her or make her happy, but…maybe sometimes that’s all it takes. Someone who really sees you and wants you anyway. Just the way you are.”

“Just the way you are,” Melody repeated softly. She wondered if she would ever have that.

*****

At work the next day, Melody was surprised to see her mother’s name and phone number show up on her call display. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d talked to her mom, because she’d been so busy getting Ava settled in.

“Hi Mom,” Melody said, balancing the phone between her ear and shoulder so she could finish the e-mail she was composing.

“Hi sweetheart,” Rita said. Melody could hear the smile in her voice, and her throat tightened with emotion. This was the longest she had gone without seeing or speaking to her mother since their brief falling out ten years before. “How are you doing?”

“Good, how are you? How’s Ava?”

“I think I can finally honestly say we’re good,” Rita replied. “Ava’s settling into school nicely, and she really likes the apartment. We still have difficult days, but the doctor said that’s to be expected.”

The last time Melody had spoken to her mother, Rita told her she was taking Ava to see a child psychologist to help her with all the changes in her life. Rita was worried about Ava because she didn’t speak much, and there were days when she hardly ate. Rita was concerned that Ava had been traumatized by whatever Melody’s sister had put her through over the years, and she wanted her to have a clean slate and a normal life now that she was living with her.

“That’s great, Mom, I’m glad things are going well,” Melody said. “Does that mean I can finally see you again?”

“That’s part of why I called, honey. I feel just awful about cutting you out for so long.” Her voice wavered, and Melody felt the threat of tears stinging her eyes. “I’d really love for you to come by for a visit. I think Ava’s ready to meet you.”

A very small part of Melody wondered if she was ready to meet Ava. The guilt her mother felt at not seeing Melody for a few weeks was nothing compared to the guilt Melody felt for only having seen Ava a few times in her entire life. She knew it wasn’t her fault, and that it couldn’t be helped—her sister lived three hours away and moved around frequently so that Melody was never exactly sure where she lived—but it didn’t stop the guilt that had gnawed at her over the last ten years.

“She knows…I mean…you’ve explained things to her, right? She knows we wanted to be part of her life, but Jackie…”

“Yes, she knows,” Rita said. “It was hard to explain it in a way that didn’t make her mother look even worse, but I think she understands.”

“Okay. I just worry that she resents us for not being there. For not rescuing her from a shitty mother.” Melody cringed and bit her lip. Without meaning for it to happen, her voice had risen, and even she could hear the anger and bitterness in it. For years, Jackie had been a sore spot between Melody and her mother, so she tried to avoid talking about her for that exact reason.

Rita sighed heavily on the other end of the line. “You’re not wrong, Melody,” she said wearily. “I know it’s horrible to say that about my own child, and I wish to god things were different, but Jackie
is
a shitty mother. She’s selfish and she’s always put her own needs above Ava’s. It’s a miracle this little girl isn’t damaged beyond repair.”

She paused, and Melody could hear her take a few deep breaths before continuing. “But Ava has a chance now to have the life she deserves. I’ll admit I’m scared I’m going to do something wrong or that she’s so emotionally damaged she’ll never live a normal life. But if I want to give her a chance at a normal life, I need your help.”

“My help?” Melody asked, surprised.

“Yes. I thought it was best to keep Ava…I don’t know, sequestered is the word that comes to mind. Just separate from everything until I knew what I was dealing with, you know? But she needs family, she needs happiness and laughter and normalcy.”

“And that’s where I come in? Because I’m so normal?” Melody asked, hoping to lighten the mood.

She was rewarded with a soft laugh from her mother. “Compared to certain other people, yes. I think you’d be a good influence. And once Ava’s used to you, I’d love for her to meet Olivia, too. Maybe she could spend some time with you girls.”

“We’d love that, Mom. I want to help any way I can.” Melody knew raising Ava on her own wouldn’t be easy for her mother. She had already raised two children—three, if you counted Olivia, which Melody did—and now she was doing it all over again, but this time she was much older, and doing it alone. Only she didn’t
have
to do it alone, and Melody was glad she’d finally realized that.

“Good. I think you and Liv would be a good influence on her. She can see what strong, independent women look like, and have someone to look up to.”

“Well, there’s no one better for that than you, Mom,” Melody said.

Rita sniffed. “I’ll be angry at you if you make me cry right now Melody Cartwright.”

Melody laughed. “Sorry, but it’s true. Just ask Olivia; she sings your praises even more than I do.”

Rita gave a teary-sounding chuckle. “I’ve missed you, Mel. I’m so sorry for cutting you out.”

“I understand, Mom,” Melody assured her. “You were doing what you thought was best for Ava, and I can’t fault you for that. But I
have
missed you. When can I see you?”

They made arrangements for Melody to come to dinner Wednesday night, and then Rita had to go so she could get to a meeting at Ava’s school.

Melody sighed and leaned forward to rest her head in her hands. She was looking forward to getting to know her niece, but she was worried about her mother and the toll it might take on her having to raise another child at her age. She realized that grandparents sometimes ended up raising their grandchildren for various reasons, and they made out fine, but it didn’t stop her from being concerned.

“You all right?”

Melody glanced up to find Angelica leaning against the wall of her cubicle.

“Yeah, I’m good.” Melody straightened in her chair and smiled at Angelica. “Just talking to my mom. And speaking of moms, how’s yours? Has she gone home yet?”

“No,” Angelica groaned, her shoulders slumping pitifully. “She won’t
leave
, Melody. Her weekend visit has now turned into a weeklong
plus
visit. I don’t know how much more I can take. My apartment is the size of a shoebox, so there’s no getting away from her. And what am I supposed to do, tell her to go home because she’s driving me crazy?”

Melody stifled a laugh. “I’m sorry,” she said, hoping she sounded appropriately sympathetic. “Why is she staying so long?”

“She hasn’t said. All she keeps saying is how much she likes it here and how much she misses me being so close by.”

“Well, if you ever need to escape, you can hang out at my apartment,” Melody offered. “We’re usually there in the evenings. Although, I don’t know if that’ll be the case with Olivia for long.”

“Ooh, I sense gossip.” Angelica’s demeanor switched from downtrodden to excited in the span of ten seconds. She stepped into Melody’s cubicle and propped her hip on the desk. “What’s going on with Olivia?”

“She met a guy the other night,” Melody told her.

“A guy?” Angelica said. “Like, as in a guy that’s more than just…a one nighter?”

Melody nodded, compressing her lips to keep from laughing.

“Wow. I didn’t think she was looking for anything more than that.”

“Neither did I,” Melody admitted. “Hell, neither did
she
. It just sort of…happened.”

Angelica sighed. “I wish it would just sort of happen for me.”

Melody smiled reassuringly. “I’m sure it will.”

Angelica stood from the desk and moved to the cubicle opening. “Not with my mother around, it won’t.” She waved over her shoulder and disappeared down the corridor.

Chuckling to herself, Melody swiveled around in her seat to face the computer screen. She was beginning to think everyone she knew had mother issues of some sort. Olivia’s had left, while Angelica’s refused to leave. She knew she was lucky to have such a great relationship with her own mother, even though they had their ups and downs. Now she just had to do everything in her power to make sure she made her mother’s life easier, and that she helped give Ava the best life possible.

“Piece of cake,” she muttered to herself.

*****

Melody raised her hand to knock on her mother’s door, then stopped. She smoothed down her hair, then her pants, and considered pulling out her compact one more time to look at herself. She knew she was being ridiculous, but she couldn’t seem to stop herself.

It was Wednesday night, and she had just arrived at her mother’s apartment for dinner. She’d let herself into the secure building with her key, and even though she had a key to her mother’s actual apartment—Rita had told her to keep it when she moved out—she rarely used it unless her mother was away and asked Melody to check the mail and water her plants.

Now she stood outside the door admiring the bright yellow sunflower wreath her grandmother had made several years before. She’d seen it a million times, but her mother had a wreath for each season, and the last time Melody visited, the blue, silver, and white snowflake wreath had still adorned the door.

She was embarrassed to admit, even to herself, that she was nervous. Nervous about meeting Ava, talking to her, trying to make her feel like a welcome part of the family. What if her niece hated her? What if they had nothing in common and couldn’t relate to each other or didn’t get along?

She was startled from her thoughts by Rita’s voice on the other side of the door. “Are you going to knock, or were you planning on standing there all night?”

The lock clicked, and her mother opened the door. She was smiling playfully, and Melody felt a surge of emotion the moment she saw her. Rita was a beautiful woman; her short, dark hair was shot through with strands of silver, her blue eyes were bright and warm, and she had what Melody and Olivia had always called killer skin—smooth and blemish free with naturally rosy cheeks. She was in her sixties, but she didn’t look much older than forty-five.

“How did you know I was out here?” Melody asked.