The Ghost (24 page)

The jeweler bought the necklace from her very quickly. He had a client for it, and knew that if he didn't sell it in Boston at once, he could sell it in New York. And the money he paid her for it went directly into her account at the bank. By the end of November, she had a handsome sum there, and was surprised herself by how many people she knew in town now. Everyone had been wonderful to her, inviting her to luncheons, and in spite of her caution not to do so, she had caused quite a stir among the more distinguished people in town the few times she ventured out. It was impossible not to see how aristocratic she was, nor to realize how unusual, and her beauty was rapidly becoming a topic of constant conversation among all the prosperous, eligible men in Boston, many of whom gathered at the Royal Exchange Tavern, where more than a few mentioned Sarah. Almost overnight, Sarah Ferguson had become the object of everyone's attention, and more than ever, it made her anxious to go away and live quietly, before reports of her whereabouts crossed the Atlantic and reached Edward. Even at such a great distance, she feared the long reach of his arm.

She shared the Thanksgiving celebration with the Blakes, and two days later was invited by the illustrious Bowdoins for a dinner party, which was a sign of her acceptance into the first circles of Boston. She wasn't even going to accept the invitation at first, she had no real interest in entering the elite social circles, and making herself conspicuous to all concerned. But Belinda was so upset when she said she wasn't going to go, that in the end, after considerable badgering from the Blakes, she agreed to go.

How will you ever get married again? Belinda scolded afterward, she treated Sarah like one of her daughters. And Sarah only shook her head with a wistful smile. There was so much she would never be able to tell her.

I don't intend to marry again, she said firmly, and there was something in her eyes that told Belinda how irreversibly she meant it.

I know you feel that way now, Belinda comforted her with a gentle hand on her arm, and I'm sure Mr. Ferguson was a lovely, kind man. Sarah's stomach almost turned over as she thought of Edward. There had never been anything lovely or kind about him, not even in the beginning. He had been a wise match, at best, and nothing more than that. And in time he had become a monster. But I'm sure that one day you'll find someone quite as fine as he was. You must marry again, Sarah, dear. You're far too young. You can't stay alone forever, and perhaps you'll be fortunate enough this time to have several children. But at that, something died in Sarah's eyes and Belinda saw it.

I'm not able to bear children, she said stiffly, and Belinda would never have dared to ask her how she knew that to be the case.

That may well not be true, Belinda said gently, taking Sarah's hand in her own, I had a cousin who was barren for many years, and at forty-one, she discovered that she was expecting. She had twins, Belinda beamed at her, and both lived. She was the happiest woman on earth, and you're far younger than she was. You must not despair. You will have a whole new life here. It was what she had come to America for, a whole new life, but certainly not marriage, or babies. Much to her chagrin, she'd already had one terrifying union. And she would never have misled anyone into responding to her supposedly being single. She was careful not to flirt with the men, or lead anyone on. At the dinner parties where she went, she conversed mainly with the other women. But the men spoke of her constantly anyway, and even Sarah had to admit, she often found them more intelligent to speak to. But her interest in them was only in learning a little more about business, discussing their land with them, or trying to learn more about farming. It only made her more fascinating to them. The other women only spoke of each other's clothes and their own children. And her refusal to lure the men closer to her only made her that much more appealing. She was a constant challenge to them. In fact, several men had come to call on her at Ingersoll's. They had left flowers and cards, enormous baskets of fruit when it could be found, and even a slim book of poetry reached her hand. It was the gift of a young lieutenant she had met at the Arbucks'. But she refused to see all of them, no matter how generous their gifts, or how lavish the flowers they left her. She had no interest whatsoever in pursuing, or being pursued by them, although Lieutenant Parker was particularly persistent, and she accidentally ran into him several times waiting around for her in the parlor. He was hoping to lend her his protection in any way he could, carry her packages for her if she was going in or out, or escort her to whatever public place she planned to visit. He was twenty-five years old, had come to Boston from Virginia the year before, and he was head-over-heels in love with Sarah. And in spite of his endless kindnesses to her, she found him exasperating each time she saw him. She was always falling over him like a large, panting dog, aching to play, and only succeeding in making himself an intolerable nuisance. She only wished he would fix his affections on someone else, and find a more eligible young woman to play with. She had already told him that she was in mourning for her late husband, and had no intention of ever remarrying, but it was evident he didn't believe her, or care how old she was.

You have no idea how you will feel about it six months or a year from now, he said firmly, but she always shook her head and tried to make herself clear to him as she rebuffed him.

Yes, I do know how I'll feel a year from now ' or two ' or ten' . Unless Edward died, she would be feeling very married. And even if he did, she had no desire to marry again. Her years with Edward had soured her on the experience forever. She knew without a doubt that she would never again expose herself to being the object of a man's violence, or a possession to be used and battered. She couldn't even imagine how other people stood it. And she knew that many husbands were kind men, but she had no desire to take another gamble. She would be very content to stay alone forever, although young Lieutenant Parker remained to be convinced, as did the other men she had met in Boston.

You should be grateful you have so many suitors, instead of complaining about them! Belinda Blake always scolded when Sarah grew annoyed about them.

I don't want suitors. I'm a married woman! she said one day without thinking, and then realized what she'd said almost as quickly as she'd said it. Or I was ' it's just that I know better than all this nonsense, she said demurely.

I'm sure you do. Marriage is such a blessing, it makes mere courtship seem like crumbs at a feast. Still ' you can't have one without the other. It was hopeless to explain it to her, and Sarah gave up eventually. It was useless.

It was in early December that she met Amelia Stockbridge, and subsequently her husband. Colonel Stockbridge was the commander of the Deerfield garrison, and the string of forts all along the Connecticut River, and Sarah found him fascinating to talk to. She questioned him extensively about the area, and he enjoyed sharing what he knew of it with her. She was particularly intrigued by the Indian tribes, and surprised when he told her that most of them were very peaceful.

We only have a few of the Nonotucks and Wampanoags there now, and they haven't caused any trouble in a long time. There's the occasional problem of course, too much firewater, or an argument over some land, but most of them don't cause any problems. In fact, he sounded as though he liked them, and Sarah commented that everyone had warned her that the outlying areas were too dangerous, because of the Indians, and other problems.

That's true of course, he said, smiling at her, surprised that she had any interest in the subject at all. We see some Iroquois in the spring when the salmon run. And there's always the danger of a band of renegades or a Mohawk war party coming down from the north. They've been known to make trouble for the settlers. They'd had an entire family murdered the year before, husband and wife, and seven children, just north of Deerfield, but he didn't tell her that, and generally it was quite rare now. But on the whole, the really dangerous ones are in the West. The worry of course is that the problems with the Shawnees and the Miamis will spread east, but I can't imagine they'll come as far east as Massachusetts. They could though. They've certainly been causing enough trouble out there. The president is very upset about it, he thinks we've spent enough money on Indian wars, and he's very sympathetic about the land they've lost. But they can't just continue to go around killing settlers constantly because they're angry. They're giving our people a devil of a time at the moment. She had heard about it, but it was far more exciting hearing about it firsthand, and her eyes shone as she listened.

The colonel was in Boston for the Christmas holidays. The Stockbridges had a house in town, where the colonel's wife stayed most of the time. She hated living at the garrison in Deerfield, and the colonel visited her whenever he could get away. But it wasn't very often, as Deerfield was a four-day journey.

A few days later they invited her to a small Christmas party they were giving for their friends and a few of the colonel's men who were on leave in Boston, and she happily accepted. It was a congenial group, and everyone sang while Amelia Stockbridge played the pianoforte.

Sarah enjoyed the evening thoroughly, and the only difficulty for her was that they had also invited Lieutenant Parker. He hung around her like a puppy much of the time, and Sarah did everything she possibly could to avoid him. She was far more interested in talking to the colonel, and she was fortunate enough to have a few minutes alone with him toward the end of the evening, and he was somewhat shocked by what she asked him.

I suppose it's possible, he said, frowning as he looked at her. It's quite a trip, particularly in the snow at this time of year. You couldn't come alone, you'd have to hire a guide or two, it's a good four- or five-day journey. And then he smiled ruefully. Even my wife won't do it. Several of the younger men have wives in the area, or at the garrison, and the settlers are all around us. We're quite civilized, but it's not very comfortable. I very seriously doubt that you'd like it, even for a visit. He really felt an obligation to discourage her, but it was obvious to the colonel from the questions Sarah asked that she was determined to go to Deerfield, and see it. Have you friends out there? He couldn't think of any other reason for her to leave the comforts of Boston. It was so pleasant here, and she looked far too delicate and too elegant to undertake such a journey. And yet he knew that she had come to America on a small, dismally uncomfortable ship, without so much as a companion to escort her. Sarah Ferguson was obviously a great deal tougher than she looked, and he couldn't help but respect that. I'd like to pick your guides for you, if you do decide to go. I wouldn't want you in the hands of some ruffians who'd get lost on the road, or get drunk. Let me know when you'd like to go, and I'll find some men for you. You should bring two guides, and a driver. You'll need all of them, and a good sturdy carriage. I doubt if you'll enjoy the trip, but at least you'll get there safely.

Thank you, Colonel, she said with a light in her eyes he had never seen before, and it was obvious to him then that nothing he could have said would have stopped her. He tried to explain that to his wife, when he told her about the exchange and she scolded him soundly.

How can you even think of letting a girl like that go to Deerfield? It's far too rough a place, she has no idea what it's like. She could get injured, or lost, or ill from the long journey. She thought his allowing her to go, and even offering to find guides for her, was an outrage.

She came here, all the way from England, on a very small ship, all alone. I don't think Sarah Ferguson is the little drawing-room flower you think she is, my dear. In fact, after talking to her tonight, I'm quite sure she isn't. I think there's a great deal more to that girl than any of us has guessed, or than she's told us. He was a wise man, and he could see in Sarah's eyes that she had come far over a long, hard road, and as long as she could do anything about it, nothing was going to stop her. She had the kind of determination he'd seen in the people who'd gone west, to eke their living out of the land, and face the unknown, and even fight the Indians. The ones who had survived it had been just like Sarah. She'll be fine. I'm quite sure of it, or I wouldn't have told her I'd help her.

You're an old fool, Amelia growled at him, and then a little while later, she went to bed and kissed him, but she still thought he was mistaken about Sarah, and that her plan to go to Deerfield was completely crazy. She only hoped that Sarah would meet someone in town and forget all about it.

But Sarah came to see the colonel again the next day. She had thought about what he'd said all night. In fact, she had been so excited she couldn't sleep. And she wanted to accept his very kind offer, and ask him to help her find guides to bring her to Deerfield. She asked when he was going back, and he said in another week. He was going right after the New Year, and this time he planned to stay until spring. Amelia was going to be busy enough without him, as their oldest daughter was expecting a baby any minute.

I'd come along with you, Colonel Stockbridge said thoughtfully. But I'm going with some of my men, we're going to ride hard, and cover the ground a little more quickly. You'll be more comfortable if you come at your own pace. And then he smiled at her, and made a suggestion. I could leave Lieutenant Parker to go with you, if you like. But Sarah was quick to decline his suggestion.

Td much rather you didn't, she said softly. I'd prefer just hiring guides, as you suggested last night. Would you be able to find some? she asked cautiously, and he nodded.

Of course. Would you like to go in the next month? he asked as he mentally wandered over a list of men he would have trusted to go with her.

I'd love that, she said, and they exchanged a long, warm smile. None of his daughters had ever offered to go and see him. They went once every few years, with their families, under great duress, and considered it a remarkable adventure. This girl on the other hand acted as though it were the opportunity of a lifetime. And to Sarah, it was. It was all she wanted.