The Hindi-Bindi Club (26 page)

18 January

Dear Kiran,

How are you? I’m still wearing a smile from our phone conversation yesterday. It was wonderful to share the latest twists and turns of your roller coaster! As I told you, ups and downs are to be expected. I’m proud of how you’re handling them. I’m VERY proud of you for getting on, and staying on, this crazy ride!

Selfishly speaking, it’s been such a joy for Mom to hold her baby’s hand again, even if my baby’s a big girl and doesn’t need Mom’s hand-holding. More so, actually. Somehow, it means that much more to me because it’s your CHOICE. You don’t NEED me…but you WANT me. (Another of God’s late revelations!!)

While I was disappointed to hear Mr. Pediatrician declined our contact, it’s his loss. Forget him. Same with the others. Don’t try to second-guess their reasons. Move on. Dwelling on the negative gets us nowhere. Focus on the positive. You have plenty of it!

I was glad to hear you and Mr. Architect clicked in email. I can’t wait to hear how it goes on your first “phone date”!
(Do NOT use that term with Aji or Ajoba! Or any Indians of my generation and up! Phone INTERVIEW. You’re INTERVIEWING each other.
)

Saroj Auntie phoned this morning. She’s been busy!
She has an ever-growing list of “leads” she’s going to email to me. I’ll forward the list to you when I get it, and we can discuss. Saroj Auntie volunteered to prescreen/make introductions, but don’t feel pressured. These are only options, not obligations.

It’s funny…The more I write, the more I want to write. I can go a long time without talking to someone, but once I do, I’m itching to talk again soon afterward. It’s like breaking a fast. Once you eat, you hunger for more. Is that how you felt (feel?) about cigarettes?

Yes, I know. Are you surprised? You weren’t as good of a storyteller as you thought. But then, your mother comes from a land of storytellers.

I knew you smoked, not just your friends whom you blamed for your smelly clothes and hair when I noticed. I might not have caught you red-handed, or found hard evidence (though I looked), but moms know these things. You’ll find that out for yourself when you have children. (If they’re anything like you, I’m in for quite a show as the Aji who gets to sit back and watch!
)

Now, while we’re on the topic of smoking…Yes, here comes Mom’s lecture, and you’d better read every word—there WILL be a quiz!

As a doctor, you know the dangers, the health risks of this filthy habit. Specifically, the correlation between smoking and cancer. But for some reason I’ve never understood, you doctors can be the worst offenders! So I urge you: Please do NOT gamble with stakes this high. We now have a documented case of breast cancer in our family. Take it from me, the temporary pleasure you might get from a cigarette isn’t worth permanently cutting off your breasts, or cutting short your life.

Okay, end of lecture. For now. I reserve the right to resume at will.

It rained in the mountains yesterday, starting late in the afternoon and pouring all through the night. The soothing patter of raindrops lulled me into the most heavenly sleep, but I awoke to a miserable cold dampness and had a terrible time getting out of bed. We turned on the single space heater in the living room, which toasted us up nicely, but I’m going out this afternoon to buy one for every room. If I tell Ajoba, he will protest that it’s wasteful to have so many when they’re hardly ever used, so I’m following Aji’s example of saying nothing and quietly doing what I want. Ha, ha.

That reminds me…You might get a kick out of this…

I had an incident with Aji this morning. You know I’ve always worn saris in India. This trip, I’ve taken to wearing salwar-kameezes—better camouflage for my chest. Aji noticed this change but accepted it easily enough (so far). It’s not that drastic, still within reason. Today, however, it’s cold, and thinking only of warmth and comfort, I dressed in jeans and sweatshirt. Aji was horrified! “What’s this??? You can’t go out dressed like that! Go change your clothes right away!”

Women my age don’t wear jeans. It would be like wearing a miniskirt. People would snicker, “Look, the old bat’s dressed like a college girl, doesn’t feel any shame!”

Funnier than Aji’s reaction, though, was MINE…Before, I would have been thoroughly embarrassed at my lapse in judgment and dashed off to change without hesitation. Today, I thought: So what? Frankly, I don’t give a damn. I’m too old, and I’ve been through too much this year to care about people’s judgments. Let them laugh at me. My physical comfort’s more important than their stupid opinions. Then, ZAP!!! In that instant, something hit me like a lightning bolt! I thought: My God, I’m Kiran, and Aji’s me!!!
It was a FREAKY FRIDAY moment!!!
Of course, I returned to my own body shortly thereafter and changed clothes. It doesn’t matter to me, but it does to Aji, and she matters to me, so that’s that.