The Honor Trilogy: Books One, Two, and Three of the Honor Trilogy (49 page)

Many moments have passed before Storm and Shelby find us under the tree.

“You guys all right?” Storm asks, walking slowly toward us.

With Ethan still holding me, I feel kind of guilty, but I have a feeling Storm doesn’t mind. At least it doesn’t appear so on his face.

Then the thought hits me. “Does Shelby know?” I whisper to Ethan.

He nods. “Yeah.”

Why was I the last to know?

Wiping my face with my palms, I climb out of Ethan’s lap and stand. Ethan follows.

“Do you need more time?” Storm’s looking at me as if gauging my reaction.

Ethan shrugs. “I told her.”

“He can’t go,” I cry to Storm, as if he can do anything about it.

“It’s either him or you, Honor.” He shakes his head. “Ethan insists it’s him.”

“It’s all my fault,” I declare over the gigantic mass in my throat. “It
should
be me.”

“But you’re not an empath anymore, Honor,” Shelby says innocently.

“But…it’s just…”

“Honor,” Ethan puts his arm around me and pulls me to his side. “Stop. It’s something I
want
to do.” He pulls me away from Shelby and Storm. “I couldn’t live with myself if I declined them and they came after you. Empath or not, they know you healed more than a dozen people on the flight.”

I hiccup, trying to keep my crying to myself.

“They’re not going to just accept that you’re no longer an empath. And that’s another thing I don’t want to explain – you have to die and be brought back to life in order to lose your abilities? I dread it if they find that out. What they wouldn’t try, knowing that. For now they think it’s the heart transplant that did it.” He tilts his head and grazes my chin with his fingertips. “I led them to believe the abilities stem from the heart…one day they may find out the truth…but I’ll worry about it then.” He laughs, but not a real laugh. “If they don’t have another empath to heal me, I figure they won’t kill me, right?”

“Oh, Ethan.” He pulls me into his arms and I squeeze him tight.

“Uncle Tom and my brothers left this morning.”

I pull my head back. “What?”

“They’re going to start over somewhere else.” Ethan shakes his head. “We didn’t want the government looking into them. Right now they don’t know they exist…well, hopefully.”

“This is just horrible.” I close my eyes and sink into his chest. “I’m
gonna miss you so much.”

“Me too, angel.” His voice catches and I know he’s crying too. “But I’ll always be here.” He taps my heart. “You know that, don’t you? I will always be in your heart and you’ll always be in mine."

His words make me convulse in his arms. “Oh, Ethan.” My heart squeezes underneath my chest. Through the pain, I finally say, “You’ll always be in my heart. Always. Always.” Pausing to catch my breath, I try to inhale his scent and remember it always. “You were my first love, Ethan. I could never forget you. Ever.”

The top of my head feels damp. “You were mine too, angel. Thank you for opening up
my
heart. I…” He doesn’t finish, he’s crying too hard. “Oh my God, Honor…” His hand moves from my back, to his mouth. “Oh my God, I…I…”

I want to wrap him up and never let him go. “I’m so sorry. So.
Sorr…” Words just won’t come out, the pain hurts too much. This new heart is different than my old one. Its capacity to hurt is much greater than my own. My old one would have drained all my emotions and shut down. This one catches fire and ignites tiny embers throughout my entire body. There is no escaping this kind of hurt. Unlike before, my body doesn’t just drop to the floor and pass out. But right now I want to die. Because of me, a boy I love is sacrificing his life.

Then it occurs to me. Storm had sacrificed his life too.

I am a monster to allow this. To allow everyone I love to die for me. It’s…it’s…inexcusable.

Finally, I get out what I need to say. “No. You can’t go, Ethan. You can’t. Let them come after me. I don’t care. If it’s me they want, then it’s me they’ll get. I’m not worth this, Ethan.”

Holding me at arm’s length, he tilts his head and smiles.

“I’ve made my decision, Honor.” He wipes at his face. “And I’m okay with it. Aside from missing you, I’m really okay with it.”

Into his arms I fall again.

“No. This isn’t the life you chose. You shouldn’t have to…”

“Stop.” He interrupts me. “I can’t just not show up in Virginia, Honor. It’s too late to run. Too late to turn back now. But…” He kisses the top of my head and looks in my eyes again. “But I’ll always love you. Remember that. Please.”

One last hug and he steps away. “It’s time to go now, babe. I have a long drive tonight.” He swallows hard and looks down to the ground, turning silently and walking away.

Before the sight of him disappears behind my tears, Shelby runs to him, takes his hand, and walks with him the rest of the way.

Leaving me to watch, heartbroken, as the first boy I ever loved walks out of my life forever.

“Come on, sweetness,” Storm’s suddenly beside me, wrapping his strong arms around my shoulder. “Let’s get you home.”

Though I love Storm, and know I made the right choice, I can’t help but feel guilty that I also love Ethan so much. I hope Storm understands, because I will always love Ethan and he will always own a special place in my heart.

Hand in hand, Storm and I make our way back to my new red car, and I think how this moment should be such a happy one – my first day at college, my boyfriend at my side – yet it is tinged with a sadness I never expected – my new heart will forever be damaged by the scar left by Ethan’s leaving. And knowing he left to save me from the same captive fate he must lead doesn’t lessen the pain of his absence.

It makes it greater.

“I want to take you out tonight, princess,” Storm’s deep voice resonates through the tiny speaker of my cell phone, “so no studying tonight. You need a break.”

“But we have finals next week,” I whine.

“Yeah.
Next
week. Not
this
week. Plus you study every night. I’m sure you’re going to ace your exams.”

I remove the text book from my lap and stand from my bed to look in my closet for something to wear. “But I really want to get into Seton Hall so I can go to school with Tamlin next year.” I pull out a deep purple skater-style dress, hoping it’s perfect for wherever Storm is taking me.

“Babe, you’re going to get in. There’s no doubt. Stop worrying.”

“I just really miss her. And I really want to get into their psychology department.”

“Honor. You will. Now will you go out with me tonight?” Storm pleads.

I chuckle. “Yes, I’ll go out with you tonight.” I hang the dress on top of my closet so it’s all set for later. “It’s cold. We’re not going for one of your hikes through the woods are we?”

“Nah, though I do love walking behind you when you’re climbing those rocks.”

“Pervert.”

“Yeah, pervert. If I were a pervert, I’d have gotten past second base already.”

Thank goodness he’s on the other side of the phone, because I
know
I’m blushing. My cheeks actually feel hot when I touch them. It’s not that I haven’t
wanted
to go further with Storm, but I think he’s afraid to make the first move. It would be the first time for both of us, and even though he’s a guy, I know he’s just as afraid as I am.

“Did I make you blush, princess? I think I did.”

“Storm,” I whisper, because I
am
still blushing. And I can’t help thinking about what it would be like to finally be with Storm like that.

“Sorry, sweetness. I won’t make you blush anymore, at least not when I’m not there to enjoy seeing your face get cherry red.” His smirk is so big I can hear it over the phone.

I know he talks like that because he’s ready.

So am I.

My body gets tingly just thinking about it.

**

A limousine showing up in my driveway was certainly not what I had in mind when Storm said he was taking me out. From my front window, I see Storm step out of the shiny black car. His newly bleached blonde hair and thrice unbuttoned crisp white shirt are striking against his black leather sports coat and black slacks. When he reaches my front door, I open it, looking down. His new black Doc Martens meet my gaze before my eyes travel slowly up to the black leather gun metal warrior necklace he likes to wear. When my vision catches his mouth, I can’t help but keep my eyes locked on his lips.

His Adam’s apple bobs up and down as he swallows. His fingertips touch my chin, lifting my face to look him in the eyes. “You are so beautiful, princess.”

Though he’s used that term of endearment on me thousands of times, butterflies still insist on fluttering inside my stomach when he calls me princess.

“So. Do. You.” I need to breathe between each word. I’ve practically come undone right in front of him. There has never been a more gorgeous sight than the man standing at my front door.

“I’m beautiful?” he asks with a raised brow.

“Most definitely,” I say, licking my lips.

He laughs and takes my hand. “Your parents home?”

“No. They went out for the night.”

The guttural sound that comes out of his throat signals to me that he has second thoughts about going out tonight.

“We
gotta get outta here.”

Storm’s arm falls around my shoulders to slide me over to his side of the back seat. The limousine is so large that it’d take several steps just to knock on the partition window up by the driver. A rapid flapping of little wings swim around my insides as my limbs begin to quiver in anticipation of tonight.

My eyes involuntarily close when he runs his free hand up my thigh and without warning, I can’t breathe. When I lean my head on his shoulder, he leans forward and kisses my forehead, working slowly down my nose to my mouth. I open my eyes to see his deep purple eyes looking right into mine. “I love you, Honor. I love you
so
much.”

A combination of warm and cold chills runs up and down my legs and arms. “I love you too. More than you could imagine.”

He takes my face in both his large hands. “And I am so grateful for that, sweetness. Every day of my life, I am so grateful that you fell in love with me. For the rest of my life I want to earn that position, baby.” He swallows hard and brings his lower lip between his teeth. “I didn’t think I would ever be deserving of anyone’s love, never mind yours. When I think back to the man I used to be,” Storm’s thumb runs over the top of my ear, “it’s staggering. When I first met you, my world turned around. I found a reason to live. A reason to smile. A reason to be a better person.” My heart pounds listening to him. “Thank you, Honor. Thank you for making me who I am today.”

His hands fall to my legs at the same time he drops to one knee on the floor of the limo. “I realize we’re young, princess, and I intend for us to finish out college first, but,” he reaches into his jacket pocket as he takes my left hand in his and holds it tight, “I was just wondering if when we graduate, you wouldn’t mind becoming my wife.” He holds up a solitary square diamond ring set on a white gold band. “Will you marry me, Honor? When we graduate, will you be my wife? Will you…”

“Storm,” I interrupt. “You wanna give me a chance to answer?”

Sitting back on his leg, he nods once.

“Yes. YES,” I say louder, “I
will
marry you. I would
love
to be your wife.”

Sliding the ring on my left finger, Storm’s hand trembles, reminding me that he may be big and strong, but he’s sensitive and vulnerable too – the exact reasons I fell in love with him in the first place.

“Oh, baby,” he cries, squeezing me between his arms. “Thank you…thank you, thank you, thank you,” he says before kissing me on the mouth. Once I open my mouth just a little, his tongue claims mine and he tastes so good. A little sweet, a little salty. Just like him.

Just when Storm’s hand finds my skin beneath my shirt, the limousine comes to a complete stop. “I guess we’re here,” he mumbles into my mouth.

“Mmmm,” I utter back, unwilling to break our embrace.

“
Mmmm, I know it’s comfortable where we are.” His lips are a breath away from mine now. “But we have reservations.” He kisses me one more time. “We’ll pick up where we left off later.”

Looking into my eyes and tapping my nose with his finger, he says, “Come with me.”

We step out of the limousine into Manhattan. “New York City?” I ask.

Storm nods. “Hayden Planetarium.”

“Oh my gosh. I’ve never been here.” Looking up into this huge glass box with a big blue ball inside of it, I’m in awe. I never knew something like this ever existed.

“Look at you all bright-eyed,” Storm remarks, pulling me by the hand closer into him.

“It’s just so…so freaking awesome.”

“I knew you’d love it,” Storm says proudly. “I couldn’t resist bringing you here.”

“You’ve been here before?” I squeeze his hand and look up at him.

“Nope. I’ve only seen it online.” Excitedly, he pulls me up the stairs into the building. “I thought to myself,” he says, while he shows his identification to the hostess, “what would Honor like to see that she was never able to see before?”

I raise my eyebrows up at him.

“Yeah. Pretty much everything. So I thought I’d start by showing you the Universe.”

We settle inside the sphere to watch the most breathtaking images of the Universe I’ve ever seen. It’s like being outside at midnight, only better. Though we are not the only ones in the theater, it feels like Storm and I are the only two people in the entire galaxy. The night is perfect. With Storm holding my hand under the stars and planets, there is nowhere else I’d rather be.

Until later that night…