The Kissing Stars (20 page)

He turned his head away from her, staring out the window. “So how did you get by?”

“The first couple months were all right. I was careful with what I spent and the townspeople were kind. I took in some sewing and got by. Then the rumors started.”

“Rumors?”

Tess debated how much to tell him. On the one hand, he didn’t need to know all the details, but on the other…well…it might make the going easier if he knew just how much Doc had helped her. “Word got around town that I was whoring.”

“What?”

“My father made it known that he’d disowned me. Do you remember Lester Woods at the Rolling R? I’ve always believed he was the one who started the talk. He came by our cabin one day with a wicked glint in his eyes. I sent him on his way. Shortly after that, word got around that I was supposedly making my living on my back. Men took to coming around night and day. It became rather…ugly. Someone burned me out.”

Across the small bedroom, Gabe sucked in a harsh breath. “They burned our home?”

She nodded. The horror of those old memories washed over her, forcing her to collect herself before continuing the tale. “The following day the sheriff came around and suggested I move on to another town where I could make a fresh start. He gave me twenty dollars and a stage ticket west. I got lucky when we arrived at a stagecoach inn only to find the owner’s wife had traveled back East for a family visit and the cook had quit the day before. I got the job and that lasted for almost three months until the wife returned.”

Gabe lurched from his chair and started pacing, a panther on the prowl. Or a man trying desperately to run from the reality of the past.

“After that is when I had a run of bad luck. I took a job as a seamstress in San Antonio. One of the other employees resented me and…well…to make a long story short, I ended up in jail charged with theft.”

He braced both hands against a wall at shoulder level, his head hanging, one knee bent, his weight resting on the other leg. He gave the appearance of an animal in pain, and Tess hated to continue, but she knew she must. Better to cauterize a wound quickly. “They didn’t listen to me when I tried to explain what had happened. I was in jail for six weeks.”

Gabe reared back and put his fist through the plaster wall, his curses steady, low, and furious.

Tess shook her head at the sight of his scraped and bleeding knuckles. “Now what good did that do, might I ask?” she said, getting up to wet a cloth from the pitcher of water on her bedside table. She crossed over to him, intending to tend his hand, but he flinched away from her. “Don’t. Don’t bother.”

“But you need—”

He yanked the cloth away from her and wrapped his hand. “Finish it, Tess. Tell me everything.”

“Why?” she replied angrily. “So you can run off and break your leg next? I’m not doing this to hurt you, Gabe, and I won’t have you hurting yourself, either.”

He clenched his jaw and said, “Fine.”

She sighed heavily. “Don’t lock up on me now. I want you to listen hard to what I have to tell you next.”

“I’m listening.”

Like a man headed to the gallows
, she thought.
Fine, then. I’ll give him the noose and we’ll see what he does with it
.

“I was in jail when Doc found me. He’d been looking for me, trailing me across Texas. He convinced the other seamstress to confess to the theft, got me released from jail, then found a house to rent and a doctor to monitor my pregnancy.”

As she spoke, Tess watched him grow tense, his body going stiff like wet rawhide drying beneath the desert sun. But she was determined to mention every single thing Doc had done for her. Gabe needed to hear them.

She continued “Doc stayed with me, took care of me. When I went into labor, he went for the doctor. In those first few minutes following Rachel’s birth when she almost died and the doctor was busy saving my own life, Doc tended Rachel and pulled her through the crisis. He was there for me that night and the night she died. When I felt so sad afterward and wanted to give up and die myself, he reminded me of all the good things I had to live for. He wrote off and got me the fellowship with Dr. Pierce, then saw us safely to Europe. When it was time, he brought us home and found us a place to settle, a place to build a home.”

“What a paragon,” he drawled. “So what will he think to learn you’ve been bedding down with me, Tess? Do I need to watch my back?”

With a penetrating stare, Tess studied her husband. He was good at hiding his emotions, but when she looked past the gray glaciers that were his eyes she saw flickers of what he was feeling. Fury and jealousy. Shame and self-contempt. It was time to finish it. Time to finish so the healing could begin.

Her mouth as dry as the Chihuahuan in summer, she drew a deep breath and said, “He is a treasure. I never would have made it without Doc.”

“He took the place of your husband.”

“In a manner of speaking, he did. He filled in for you. For
you
, Gabe. Everything he did for me, he was doing for you.”

“Oh yeah? I can’t wait to hear how you’re gonna reason this one out.”

“You’ve never asked his last name.” She waited, watching, hoping he’d work his way to the truth himself. But from the set of his jaw and the steel in his stance, she realized he wasn’t thinking, simply absorbing. That and waiting for the next blow.

She hoped the last one wouldn’t fell him.

Tess licked her lips, then said, “Doc stood in for you like any good father would do. Like any good father and grandfather.”

His gaze jerked up to meet hers then, his eyes round and glittering. Like an animal caught in torchlight.

“Yes, Gabe,” she said. “Doc is the name we call Monty Cameron. Doc is your father.”

CHAPTER 11

FOR THREE DAYS TESS watched the canyon trail waiting for Gabe to come home. For three nights she studied the Kissing Stars, wishing she believed in their supernatural powers like her friends so she could ask them to lead her husband back to where he belonged. With her.

He’d left without a word once she told him the truth about Doc. He’d left, fled, before she could confess her last secret, the one that might have soothed some of his pain.

As the first day passed and then the second, she came to believe events had worked out for the best. As much as she loved him, if Gabe wanted to be part of her life, part of her family, then he must reconcile with Doc. She refused to turn her back on the man who’d walked with her through fire.

Then, too, she had her more selfish reason for keeping the last bit of news to herself. She loved her husband and she wanted his love in return. She wanted him to want her. And she needed to trust in the knowledge that he wanted her as much as he wanted what she could give him.

The fact that she had intended to tell him and was prevented from doing so by his flight assuaged any guilt she might have felt for deciding to keep her secret a little while longer. “Not that it makes any difference,” she grumbled “The man might never come back.”

Tess turned her attentions to her studies, once again using astronomy to distract her from the mess of her personal life. Early on the fourth afternoon as she left her star shed carrying the Birr Castle notebook containing her notes on stellar parallax, she noted the rider making his way down the trail into the canyon.

Her heartbeat sped up as anticipation swept over her. Then she identified the horseman and anticipation melted into disappointment. Captain Robards. Not Gabe.

Oh, well. Maybe he brought a letter from Will
.

The Ranger smiled broadly as he rode into town on a bay mare. Dismounting, he greeted the Aurorians and spent a few moments talking to Andrew, discussing a herd of wild horses he’d run across on his way down to the Big Bend He accepted Andrew’s offer to see to his mount, then he turned toward Tess, tipped his gray felt hat, and said, “Hello, honey.”

“Lionel.” She nodded and hoped her return smile didn’t look as letdown as it felt. “How was your trip? Did you find Doc and Will?”

He nodded. “I did. And I must admit, it took some doing. Thankfully, they camp outside the caves Doc is studying and I spotted their smoke. It’s a wicked land down there, Tess. I’d hate to get stranded there alone. Doc and the boy said to tell y’all they were fine and working hard. They send their hellos to everyone.”

“No letters?” Tess asked.

He snapped his fingers and delved into his saddlebags, withdrawing a pair of envelopes addressed to Tess. She grinned with delight and tucked them into her pocket, choosing to savor them later in privacy.

Amy invited him to stay for supper and promised to make her biscuits to go along with it. Andrew offered his extra bed and the Ranger accepted their hospitality with grace. Tess was anxious for more details about her loved ones, so when he invited her to take a walk with him, she readily agreed.

He asked to see her telescope, so they climbed up Lookout Peak. As they walked she inquired about Doc and Will, and listened attentively as he described what he’d found along with her family down near the Rio Grande.

“Spiders,” she repeated, shuddering. “For the most part, I truly love the desert. But I have to say tarantulas frighten me half to death. I’m not surprised to hear of Will’s collection, however. He’s always been fascinated by the creatures.”

As the path grew steeper, the lawman took the lead Tess couldn’t help but notice that Lionel Robards cut a fine figure. Broad of shoulder and slim of hip, he did the Texas Rangers proud. She felt a rush of gratitude that the people of Aurora Springs had such a man looking out for them. “How did you come to be a Ranger, Lionel?” she asked. “Did you always want to be a lawman?”

For just a moment, her question appeared to take him aback. Then he chuckled. “No, I didn’t. What I truly wanted was to grow up and play games.”

“Pardon me?”

“Chess, my dear. I’ve always wished a man could make a living playing chess. It was such a disappointment to learn as a boy that it couldn’t be done.”

Tess thought about that, then observed. “You must have an analytical mind, Lionel. I would think that serves you well with the Rangers.”

“It does.” He paused to take her hand, offering her balance as she stepped over a fallen log. “Tracking down criminals is often a case of out-thinking them. How about you? Did you always want to study the stars?”

She thought of those late night “stargazing” sessions with Gabe and shook her head. “No, I guess you could say I fell into it. But I love astronomy. It’s a beautiful, fascinating science that is peaceful, considering one is studying distant explosions.”

They reached the crest of the hill and Tess’s work station. There she showed him her new telescope and explained a little of how she tracked the Kissing Stars’ movements.

“The Kissing Stars. I must admit, Miss Tess, I like the sound of that much better than Ghost Lights, which is what I hear them called most.” The Ranger sent her a sidelong look then winked. “If a fella were up here watching the Kissing Stars with you, would he be allowed one or two himself?”

The blatant flirtation caught her by surprise and she didn’t know how she should react. Evading the question, she donned an act of dim-witted innocence and replied, “You’re welcome to use my telescope to look at the lights any time.”

The fact that her reply didn’t address his question apparently didn’t bother him. Nor did it do much more than buy her time to figure out how to react to him because she hadn’t discouraged him. To the contrary. Lionel’s remarks grew more suggestive and his pursuit more overt as the minutes ticked by.

This wasn’t at all like him. Lionel Robards had long pursued a mild flirtation with her, but it had remained just that. Mild. What in the world had gotten into him? What was different about today?

In an effort to change the direction of their conversation, Tess swivelled her telescope away from the flats and around toward Aurora Springs. She focused on Castor and Pollux as they chewed their cuds, then motioned for the Ranger to take a look.

“Not one of God’s prettiest creatures, is it?”

“Now don’t go maligning my animals, Lionel. I get enough of that from Gabe.”

“Gabe. Ah, yes. Whip Montana, the estimable Hero of Cottonwood Hollow. And where is the man? I didn’t notice him in town.”

“He left,” Tess told him simply.

“Did he go to Austin?”

“No,” Tess said, thinking of his guns. Gabe hadn’t packed a thing when he left her house that day. Along with his personal possessions, he’d left a pair of Colt revolvers behind. She’d taken comfort in that fact. Gabe might take off without taking his pants, but he’d never skip out on a fine pair of pistols. “He didn’t mention Austin when he left.”

She saw no reason to mention that he hadn’t spoken at all.

“Good,” the Ranger forcibly replied. “Glad to hear it.”

His reaction surprised her and it must have shown on her face. Robards explained, “I heard through the ranks that Governor Ross has asked Montana to come to Austin and revamp the Texas Rangers. The rumor is he wants to put all the Indian fighters out to pasture now that they succeeded in driving the Indians out of Texas. They say he’ll bring down the corps.”

Tess felt compelled to defend Gabe. “I don’t think he’s the type of man to recommend any action that isn’t warranted.”

Lionel wanted to argue—she could see it in his expression—but he chose not to. Instead he reached out and took her hand. “Enough about Whip Montana. I’m just glad he’s gone from here. I didn’t like the idea of him being around to spark my woman.”

Spark
his
woman? Tess’s unease escalated into full discomfort. Taking a step away from him, she reclaimed her hand “Lionel, please. I’ve told you in the past there can be nothing between us.”

He nodded “I understand, Tess. You are trying to protect the boy and everything.”

“No, you do not understand, Lionel,” Tess insisted. “I’m not trying to protect anyone. It’s the truth. I’m
married
.”

“Uh huh.” He grabbed her hand again. “This isn’t exactly how I wanted to get into this, but I can see it is time. I know there is no Mr. Cameron. You’ve no need to be ashamed of being a grass widow with me, Tess. I’ll be more than glad to make your make-believe husband a reality. I want you to marry me, my dear, and along with my proposal, I’m offering the promise to stay here in Aurora Springs. I will not ask you to move away from your home.”

Tess wanted to groan aloud hut she managed to stifle the impulse. A marriage proposal from Captain Lionel Robards of the Texas Rangers. Rather than being flattered, Tess was ashamed.

Though she had always presented herself as a married woman, she had to admit she’d enjoyed his attentions. She’d been alone a long time and his admiration had appealed to her femininity. It had been nice to be reminded she was still a woman. It had been nice to be shown a man could still want her. But today, under current circumstances, it wasn’t so nice after all.

Shame nipped at her like kitten’s teeth, and she began, “Lionel, please. You must—”

“Get down on my knee,” he interrupted dropping to one knee with a flourish. “Tess Cameron, would you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

Oh no, oh no, oh no
. Mortification heated Tess’s cheeks and she knew they must be as pink as Rosie’s tongue. She grabbed Lionel’s arm and tried to tug him to his feet. “Oh, I’m so sorry. Please Lionel. I’m so very sorry, but you’ve misunderstood. I truly
am
married.”

He frowned and finally rose to his feet, thank God. Surely he believed her now.

“No, you’re not married,” he answered, dashing her hope. “I know you’re not. I’ve asked around. No one has ever met your husband. You are just trying to protect your bastard.”

“What?” she shouted sharply, her guilt melting in a flash of anger. “I have no bastard.”

“The boy. Will. He’s your son. He calls you mama.”

“He does call me mama, but he also calls Twinkle mother and Amy mommy. It’s the way we do things here in Aurora Springs. We are all one big family.”

“Are you denying him?”

“The only thing I’m denying is my marital status. I’m married, Lionel. I’m sorry if you feel as if I’ve led you on, but the feet of the matter is, I am not free to marry. You have met my husband, Lionel. Last time you were here. It’s Gabe. I’m married to Gabe “Whip Montana” Cameron, and I have been for going on thirteen years. I told you from the first that I was married, and I’m sorry if my actions—innocent though they were—led you to think otherwise. I won’t blame you if you are angry, but I must insist on something. You won’t ever use that distasteful term in connection with our Will again.”

For a long moment, Lionel Robards stood completely still. Then he shook himself and gave her a sad little smile, and the tense moment was past. “I apologize, Tess. In my disappointment, I spoke out of turn. It’s true, you always told me you were married, and it was wrong of me to doubt it. I guess I simply didn’t want to believe you weren’t free to be mine.”

Honestly, Tess said, “You’ve been a special friend to me, Lionel, and I hope that won’t change. If things had been different…”

He leaned over and tenderly kissed her cheek. “Well, Tess, I have to tell you, I’m not giving up hope. Things can always change, can’t they? And while you might be married to him now, who’s to say what will happen in the future? After all, Whip Montana isn’t here, is he?”

Tess closed her eyes. Lionel was right. Gabe wasn’t here.

So what else was new?

GABE RETURNED to Aurora Springs at dusk. He’d timed it that way, hoping to find the spooklights shining and the place deserted. His next conversation with his wife would be better held in private.

He’d spent the first day of his exodus into the desert in a haze of grief and despair. The second and third day he raged in anger. The fourth he planned his revenge. Monty Cameron would finally get what he had coming. Because Gabe, unlike Tess, knew the extent of Monty Cameron’s sins.

Once a year for the past four years, Monty had tracked down Gabe for a visit. Never once during those tense, angry hours had he mentioned Tess or the fact that Gabe’s marriage was still valid or the detail that, for a short time anyway, Gabe had been a father.

For that alone, Gabe could kill the man.

That Monty had denied any knowledge of Tess on those occasions made him want to cut out Cameron’s tongue before doing him in.

After careful consideration, Gabe decided against patricide, mainly because he thought of something much better—or worse, to his daddy’s way of thinking. It was just that plan that led him back to Aurora Springs.

As he had hoped, the village was deserted. Good. Glancing up toward the setting sun, he figured he had time to scrape some of the dirt off, too. Even better. Smelling like a horse as he did at the moment likely wouldn’t help his cause, and he didn’t want to give Tess any excuse to say no.

Because one way or another, by fair means or foul, trickery or truth, he intended to win her away from her damned precious Doc.

Tess was his wife, his responsibility. His joy. Monty Cameron had stolen that joy away from Gabe for years. He couldn’t have her any longer.

At the house, Gabe bathed, shaved, and donned fresh clothes. Then, suitably armored both mentally and physically, he headed for Lookout Peak.

Total darkness came slowly in this part of the world, and although the sun had dipped below the horizon, fingers of brilliant red and gold light stretched from the horizon into the sky, lighting his way up the hill. He found Tess seated on a thin, multi-colored quilt near her observation point overlooking the flats. She was alone, none of the other Aurorians in sight. Her telescope stood abandoned while she sat with her arms wrapped around her knees. Her manner was that of someone lost in thought rather than study, and Gabe wondered if the spooklights were not glowing tonight after all.