The Last American Cowboy (8 page)

Chapter Seventeen

Lily wanted to go to the park when Blake and I collected her from my parents’ Sunday night. He was heading back to Montana early the next morning, but for now we sat on a bench in the playground, watching my little girl go down the slide with another child she’d made friends with ten minutes earlier.

“She has lots of energy. Don’t you ever get worn out, working and looking after her?” he asked me.

“I do, but I couldn’t do any of it without my parents.”

“Yeah, my dad’s always been a big help to me, too. My stepmom as well.”

“How long has he been married to her?”

“Twenty years. He was convinced he’d stay a widower the rest of his life, and then Jenine came along.”

“They didn’t have any kids together?”

“Jenine couldn’t have any…something wrong with her fallopian tubes or something.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Yeah, I guess it would have been nice to have half-brothers and sisters.”

“Mommy—and Blake, too—watch me, okay?” shouted Lily.

“We will, but this slide down has to be the last, because you need to take a bath then go to bed to be ready for school tomorrow.”

“Two more,” she shouted back.

I held up one finger to her.

“I bet it’s hard to say no to her,” said Blake.

“It is, but you have to,” I told him.

Lily attempted to go back on the slide despite me saying no, so I marched over to her and got hold of her hand. She threw a tantrum and cried. I dragged her toward Blake, who’d been holding Montana while she’d played.

“Do you want Blake to go home thinking you’re a spoiled little girl and never wanting to come back to see us again?” I asked her.

She continued to cry and began stomping her foot on the ground.

“I think someone’s up way past their bedtime and getting irritable,” I said.

She wiped her eyes and made a whimpering sound now. I sensed she was playing it up, hoping Blake would side with her. I prayed he wouldn’t.

“How about I show you how we carry little girls home in Montana?” asked Blake.

She stopped crying and nodded.
Blake to the rescue.
He handed me the doll then lifted her onto his shoulders. She grabbed a tuft of his hair and held onto it as we walked home.

Blake even got roped into reading her a bedtime story and, when she was fast asleep, we sat on the couch and drank wine.

“How about you and Lily come to visit me soon?”

“That would be fun.”

“She can ride a horse and get to see all the animals.”

“She’d love it. Maybe we should do it while she’s on summer vacation.”

“Okay, let’s plan on that.”

* * * * *

Just when you think things are going smoothly, life always throws something at you. Two weeks after Blake’s visit with us, I was sitting at my desk and checking what assignments were due. I looked at the oversized calendar in front of me and realized my period had been due five days ago. I slid back in my chair. I’d been so busy with work that I hadn’t paid any attention to the little fact that I’d had none of my usual
I’m about to get my period
symptoms. No bloating, no sore boobs, no craving for chocolate. I crossed my fingers, saying a silent prayer that I wasn’t pregnant. Blake and I had used a condom every time we’d had sex while he was visiting. No, it had to be a false alarm, because I didn’t even feel the same way I did when I was pregnant with Lily. I ran my hand over my head. Having another baby was the last thing I wanted. Sure, I might want that to happen one day, but I didn’t relish being a single mom to two children, especially right now.

* * * * *

I peed on the home-pregnancy-kit stick I’d picked up at the grocery store on my way home. Here I was, sitting on the countertop in the bathroom and waiting for the result. I had another couple of minutes and couldn’t bear to look at it.

“Mommy.”

It was Lily. She was trying to open the bathroom door I’d locked just in case she strolled in and asked what the stick was for.

“What is it, honey?”

“I need to tinkle.”

“Can you wait a few more minutes?”

“No, I got to go bad.”

“Okay, honey, just hang on.”

I picked up the stick, slid it into my pants pocket, and headed into the hallway, where poor Lily was holding her crotch and jigging up and down.

“All yours.”

She rushed inside, and I went to my bedroom and sat on the bed. Two minutes had definitely passed now. I pulled the stick out of my pocket, still afraid to look down, but I had to know.

I placed it on the bed and glanced down, feeling suddenly lightheaded when I saw the test was positive. I put my hand to my mouth and felt bile rising up, remembering what Blake had said in the shed during the rainstorm the first day we’d met.
I’d hate to get you pregnant…. Well, sorry to say you have, cowboy.

“Mommy.”

Lily’s voice startled me, and I shoved the stick under my thigh.

“I did a poopy, too.”

I couldn’t help but smile at her complete honesty. “I guess we should think about getting something to eat.”

“Chicken fingers.”

“Okay, chicken fingers it is. And come here, honey.”

She walked into my room, and I sat her on my lap, hugged her, and kissed the top of her head. How was I going to deal with having a baby I hadn’t planned for?

Chapter Eighteen

“You’re what?” asked my mother when I broke the news to her several days later.

“Yes, you heard correctly. I’m having a baby.”

“Fiona, haven’t you heard of birth control?”

“We used condoms.”

“You should have gone on the Pill if you knew sleeping with this cowboy was going to be a regular thing.” My mother handed me a cup of coffee, which I didn’t think I should be drinking anymore.

“I know, I know.”

“So how does he feel about it?”

“I haven’t told him yet.”

“You think he’ll want to marry you?”

“Mom, I’m not a teenager and, these days, people don’t get married just because they’re having a baby.”

“You want to marry him?”

“I don’t know.”

“You love him?”

I nodded. I’d fallen in love with him big time when he’d spent the weekend with us, and I’d seen what a great guy he’d been with my daughter.

“And then there’s Lily to think about,” I said, deciding to take my chances and drink the coffee.

My mother patted my hand. “There are other options these days. Adoption… You could even consider an abortion, Fiona.”

I shook my head. “No, I’ve already decided I want to keep this baby.”

My father chose that particular moment to walk into the kitchen after his early-morning stroll. “What baby?” he asked.

“The cowboy you thought was very charming has gotten your daughter in the family way,” said my mother.

“Does that mean I have to get out my shotgun?” asked my father.

I hugged him, loving my dad for his sense of humor and making fun of the whole awful situation.

* * * * *

I couldn’t spare the time to fly to Montana to break the news to Blake in person, but I hated the thought of telling him about his impending fatherhood over the phone, and e-mail was definitely not the way to do it either.

I picked up the phone and pressed the area code for Montana but then put it down again. How did you even begin to tell a guy you’d only known for three months that you were having his baby? Shit, the two of us weren’t even really dating.

I bit my nails and thought I’d just get it over and done with. I stabbed at the numbers, my heart beating faster as I heard the ringtone.

“Hello, this is Blake.”

I closed my eyes, hoping the words would come out. “Hi, Blake, it’s Fiona.”

“Hey, city girl. What’s happening in Boston?”

“Not much. It’s raining today—windy, too.”

“So how are you and Lily doing?”

“We’re great. Blake, there’s something really important I need to tell you. I know I should do it in person but…”

“Hey, this sounds like something I need to sit down to hear.”

“I think you should. Are you ready?”

“Sure, I am.”

“I’m pregnant.” Had I heard him fall to the ground? There was just silence at the other end of the phone now. “Blake, are you still there?”

“Sure, I am. I hope it’s my baby.”

“Yep, definitely yours.”

“You’re right. I do need to sit down.” I heard what sounded like a chair being dragged over the floor. “Guess we shouldn’t have relied on just condoms.”

“I’m really sorry.”

“Baby, it’s not your fault. We both took part in making this little one. You know when you’re due?”

“Yes, I went to see the doctor this morning, and he said some day around February 24.” There was silence again. “Blake.”

“Yeah, I’m still here. You want me to be there with you…I mean, when you deliver?”

“That would be great. I’ve opted to have the baby in the same hospital I had Lily.”

I heard some men’s voices in the background and someone calling Blake’s name.

“Fiona, I’ve got to go sort out a problem here, but I’m going to call you right back, and we can talk some more, okay?”

“Sure. I’ll be waiting.”

Chapter Nineteen

Blake never called me back, and here I was at work, sitting at my desk in tears. I’d be facing having this baby all by myself. I rubbed my belly, wondering if it was a boy or a girl and how I was going to tell Lily she’d be sharing her mommy with another sibling.

I leaned back in my chair, suddenly regretting giving in to my sexual urges. If I hadn’t slept with the cowboy, none of this would have happened. I’d been so adamant about protecting Lily from any hurt, and because I couldn’t keep my carnal passions under control, I’d affected her life, too.

I wanted to leave work early. I’d had my first round of morning sickness that day and was starting to feel sick again.

* * * * *

Later that evening, I looked at Lily, lying on her stomach in front of the TV and scribbling on an art pad my mother had given her. I’d have to tell her soon, and how was she going to react?

I took a deep breath, thinking now might be a good time to ease into the subject. The doorbell rang just as I was heading in to sit with her. When I opened it, a man in his mid-fifties with a beer gut stood there, holding a cell phone in his hand.

“Fiona Spencer?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said.

“This is for you,” he said, handing me the cell phone.

I was puzzled until I heard Blake’s voice calling my name through the phone. I lifted it to my ear.

“Guess you’re wondering what this is all about?”

“Yeah, I have a guy I’ve never seen before standing on my doorstep, and now you’re talking to me on his cell phone.”

“I tried to get a flight to Boston after we spoke.” My heart beat double time. So he hadn’t just abandoned me. “But I’ve got so much going on here, and I can’t leave right now. So I’ve spent all afternoon trying to arrange for you to come to me tonight.”

“Tonight…Blake, I can’t. I mean, I have work. I have to take Lily to my parents and—”

“It’s all arranged. I spoke with your boss, and don’t worry. Lily’s coming, too. She can spare some time away from school.”

“But…”

“But nothing. Go pack some stuff for the both of you, and this man is going to drive you to the airport. My dad, who, I should tell you, is over the moon that his only son has finally knocked up a woman, has arranged for you to fly here in his friend’s private plane.”

“Blake…”

“Go on, city girl. Don’t you argue with me. I’ll see you later tonight.”

He was gone before I could plead my case with him. I handed the man back his phone. “I guess you’re driving us to the airport. You want to come in and wait while I pack a few things?”

Chapter Twenty

If anything good came out of this mistake Blake and I had made, it was watching Lily’s face as we flew over the mountains in western Montana. She held onto her teddy bear, which she’d insisted come along for the journey, and looked out the window. Her mouth was wide open as she took in the sun, setting over a mountain peak.

“What do you think of Montana?” I asked her.

“It’s big.”

It was dark by the time the plane landed on a private runway close to Blake’s ranch. He was standing by his truck and waiting for us, his hat pushed back on his head, smiling as the man helped us down from the plane. Another man took our bags to Blake’s vehicle.

“Hello, Lily,” he said.

She was shy once again and hid behind me until I coaxed her out from behind my legs. “Can you say hello to Blake?”

“Hi.”

Blake pulled me into his arms and kissed me. “You ready to go to the ranch?”

I nodded. “It’s almost midnight where we’ve come from, and I’d really like to get Lily to bed.”