The Last Thing (6 page)

I rubbed my eyes with my hands and tried to blink back the
tears that were threatening to pour out.

“No, you don’t understand. I don’t
have
any because I
haven’t bought any since I moved in. I haven’t had my period in ohhh…I’m almost
3 weeks overdue.” Realization dawned over my cousin’s face. She put her hands
on her hips as if to scold me.

“That means….Quinn? Who?”

I didn’t want to tell her. I didn’t even want to think about
it. No one knew about my little adventure, the night I let it all go. Wasn’t
this what I deserved? She narrowed her eyes in on me when I didn’t answer.

“Quinn…who did you sleep with? As far as I’m aware of, you
haven’t dated anyone.”

 She was right. I tried to stay away from the male
population. A few guys from work had asked me out, but I wasn't ready for a
relationship.

“Chase,” I mumbled.

“Who?”

“Chase!” I said louder.

“Chase Crowley? You mean that night at the party?  You dirty,
dirty girl.”

 Ginger stood up and gave me a sly grin before hitting me in
the shoulder.

“Hey, you can’t hit a pregnant person. I’m pretty sure it’s
illegal.”

“Don’t dodge my questions.”

I slowly nodded my head in shame. “One time, one night, and
it was a huge mistake. I didn’t want a relationship. You know I’m not ready,
but he kept calling afterwards. He mentioned wanting to hook up again, so I
gave him my number. It just felt like the polite thing to do?”

Ginger slapped her hand over her mouth to cover a chuckle.
“You used him, and you are worried about being polite?”

“I didn’t know what the correct protocol was!”

“He obviously likes you.”

“So? He’s a womanizer. You told me so yourself.”

“First off, I only told you what I heard.”

Ginger took my hand and led me toward the staircase. “Secondly,
no use getting worked up over what could be nothing. Let’s take a test. I have
a few upstairs.”

I followed behind her, and kept my mouth shut as to why she
kept pregnancy tests in her room.

Once inside her large master suite, she asked me to pee in a
cup. Numbness. That was the only thing I felt.  When I was finished, I changed
into an old t-shirt and plopped down on her bed. I stared at the dozens of
stars Ginger had glued to her ceiling. I hadn’t allowed myself to process the
reality of what was happening. I was screwed up. I would make a horrible mom. When
Ginger walked out of the bathroom, I sat up and tried to gage her expression.

“Well?” I asked her. “What did it say?”

“Pregnant,” she confirmed. I groaned and fell back on the
bed. It was expected, a curse for a moment of happiness. My luck in life was shitty.

“Whatcha gonna do?” she asked me. I rolled over on to my
stomach.

“I guess I should speak to Chase,” I told her.  Ginger opened
her mouth but quickly shut it.

“What? Is that a bad idea?” 

She grabbed my hand between hers. “Honey, Chase isn’t
boyfriend material, plus I saw him trying to hook up with an intern today. I
don’t know how good of a father he’d make.”

“I’m scared,” I told her. My mind still refused to wrap
around this new discovery.

“It will be okay, I promise. He did say he had been trying to
call you back. Why
did
you blow him off?”

“I didn’t want a relationship. I just wanted to feel
something.” And I had. That night with him had stirred emotions inside of me
that I’d locked away.

“Oh you felt something alright. And in a few months you’re
gonna feel a world of pain coming right out of your va-jay-jay.”

I crossed my legs uncomfortably and made a face. “Ew, gross.
Do you really have to remind me?”

“It’s not that bad anymore. Most of the girls I know have
early C-sections. No stretch marks and you can plan your pregnancy around a
movie shoot.”

That sounded utterly ridiculous. I fought the urge to roll my
eyes. I didn’t understand why anyone would risk her and the child’s safety just
to avoid stretch marks.

“I’m not a celebrity,” I reminded her.

“So? Your baby daddy is. That will make you tabloid fodder!”

Thinking about my face on the front of those horrid magazines
made my stomach queasy. Ginger was right though.  If people found out who the
father of my child was, they would never leave me alone.  I didn’t want to be
in the spotlight like that, not like before.

“This is so weird! I can’t believe you’re pregnant,”

She was more excited than I was. 

“This isn’t exciting news, Ginger. This is bad, very bad.
Chase and I aren’t together. Who wants to raise a child with a stranger?”

“He doesn’t have to be a stranger.  I
suppose
you can
always try to date,” she told me. My heart fluttered when he touched me. There had
been a spark there, but I’d chosen not to pursue it. Was it too late to give it
another go? I squeezed my eyes shut and struggled to control my breathing.  I
was supposed to get married and have children with Bash. Not some stranger. My
life wasn’t supposed to end up like this.

 I took a deep breath. Slowly in and slowly out. The rushing
in my ears began to calm, and slowly the closed-in feeling subsided. I leaned
against her shoulder and began to cry. Ginger grabbed my hand. By now, she was
able to recognize the signs when I had a panic attack.

“Shhh….breathe with me. Just relax. It was only a suggestion.
You don’t have to marry Chase. Did you guys use protection?”

I shook my head. “I wasn’t thinking clearly, I’d had way too
much to drink. I’m on the pill. I figured we were safe. I may have missed a few
pills here or there, but I didn’t think anything of it. Things were hectic. ”

“Stupid move, Quinn.”

“It was a stupid, stupid mistake.”

“Do you like him?”

“Doesn’t matter. I’m not ready,” I told her. I put my hands
to my temples as I tried not to think about what was growing inside of me.

“You’ll never know if you don’t try.”

“No, love was never in the cards for me. I don’t think I can
do this.”

She bit her lip as if she were trying to hold something back.
“Well…you know you don’t have to keep the baby… ”

I picked up my pillow and tossed it at her head.

“Shut-up, Ginger! That isn’t an option.” Adoption and
abortion were both out of the picture. No matter what my situation, I couldn’t
give up my child. I wanted children, but not this soon.

“By the way, put something else on.” Ginger walked to her
drawers and pulled out a pink nightgown. I stared down at the old Grateful Dead
t-shirt that hit my knees.

“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?”

“For one, you’re pregnant with another man’s baby. I
recognize that shirt. You can’t wear Bash’s clothes anymore.”

I scowled at her before pulling the large shirt over my head.
I snatched the nightgown from her hand and put it on.

“Happy?”

“Yes.”

 She gave me a sly look before continuing. “Go to the doctor
first, make sure,
and then
call him.” What she said was the most
rational thing to do. But like a coward, I wanted to hide. I was so close to
getting a normal life. I had a job and a few friends.  I couldn’t hide anymore.

Quinn

“Please?” Ginger begged. I can’t believe she had lured me to
the studio with the promise of food.

“I’m not going to do it.”

“Come on, I already told them you would. You can’t leave me
hanging like this.”

“That was a shitty move, so fix it yourself.”

“Pretty please? With a cherry on top?”

“No way.”

“I’ll love you forever.” She grabbed on to my arm and tugged.

“I’m freakin’ tired, Ginger. I couldn’t sleep a wink last
night.”

“Everything okay?” Her blue eyes widened in concern.

“No.” I rubbed my hands down my face. “They started back up
again.”

“The nightmares?”

“Yeah, and it’s kept me up for the past week. Ever since I
went to the baby doctor.”

I shuddered and thought back to my visit. The numbness as the
doctor confirmed my pregnancy. Even now, I felt nothing.

“Honey, it’s just stress. You need to relax.”

“How can I when every time I close my eyes I see Bash’s
face?”

“Is it the exact same dream?”

I closed my eyes as the scene flashed before my eyes. Me.
Bash. The water. I’d gone without the dream for a few months. I thought that it
was over.

“Yes.”

“Maybe you should start seeing someone again.”

“They’ll just make me talk, and I’m sick of talking about it.
I just wanna get on with my life.”

“I’m sorry. Let’s just forget about the makeup job, okay?
I’ll tell them you can’t do it.” She grabbed my hand and squeezed it tight.

“Thanks, but you still owe me dinner.”

“Sure let me grab my bag in my dressing room. Just follow
me.”

We left the parking lot as she led me into the studio.

I stopped in my tracks as my eyes landed on Chase.

 He stood in the corner of the studio drinking a bottle of
water, laughing with a few of the other actors. Though I hadn’t seen him in a
month and a half, the mere sight of him instantly turned me on.  His brown eyes
lit up as he laughed along with the other guys. His hair fell flat around his
ears today, and even from where I stood, I could pick out the dimple in his
right cheek when he smiled. My eyes followed him with a magnetic pull. I’d been
avoiding him like the plague since I found out I was pregnant, and now I
remembered why. The moment I let him in, everything would change for me. I
didn’t want anything to do with him.

 
Too late, Quinn. Should have thought about that before
you had unprotected sex with him
.

I ran my hand across my flat stomach. He wouldn’t be able to
tell, but it still scared me half to death. Then the dreaded moment came, when
we locked eyes. He had caught me staring at him.  His expression told me he was
shocked to see me, but after a few seconds he broke our contact and went right
back to talking with his friends. It was as if he didn’t give me a second
thought.

 Anger boiled deep inside of me, and my hands tightened into
fists at my side.  He was ignoring me. I wanted to go over there and give him a
piece of my mind, something I wouldn’t normally do, but these hormones had me
acting crazy. Ginger put a hand on my shoulder to calm me down.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know he’d be here,” she told me. Somehow,
I seriously doubted that.

“You tricked me,” I accused. “There wasn’t any makeup job.”

 She gave me a sly look.

“You both need to talk, and there
was
a job.”

“No.”

“Oh come off it. You knew he worked on
Timelines
!
There was a possibility he’d be here, and you came anyway.”

Had I really?

  I tried to pretend his cold shoulder hadn’t affected me. I
was glad I’d taken the time to make myself look presentable.  My makeup was
immaculate and my hair sat in a no fuss high ponytail. I smoothed out my blouse;
my boobs had already increased at least one cup size. At least there was one reward
to being pregnant, that plus being constantly horny all the damn time.  Wait,
that wasn’t a reward when I didn’t have anyone to have sex with me.

“Has he tried calling you again?” she asked me, I shook my
head.

“Not recently.”

Barrett walked up from behind Ginger and put his arm around
her.  “My beautiful ladies, I have died and gone to heaven.”

Ginger laughed and wiggled out from under his arm, which only
prompted him to put his arm around me instead.

“You wanna hang out tonight, Quinn? I can show you the LA
nightlife.”

“We’re busy, Barrett. Go away,” I told him. This only caused
him to flirt with me some more.

“One of these days, you’re gonna give it up and join me and
Ginger for a threesome.”

“Gross,” Ginger and I both cried out at the same time.

Barrett gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before walking off.
Ginger moved closer to me.

“Go talk to him,” she urged again. She pushed me forward. Stumbling,
I almost fell onto a stage light. I turned and scowled at her. This moment had
to come, but seeing him had brought back too many feelings. Feelings I assumed
were long gone. I walked over to Chase, who was alone now, drinking that same
bottle of water while texting someone on his phone. When I was only a few feet
away, his eyes shot up and met mine. He smirked and put his phone in his pants
pocket. His style was carefree and comfortable. I let my eyes skim over his
plain white t-shirt that accented his tan.