The Letter (20 page)

Victoria pulled the bed covers high up under her chin staring at him.

“
I am not ready for this yet,” she said, her voice barely a husky whisper.

“
Everything will be fine, love. I promise.”

“
No,” her voice was stronger as her heart pounded faster and faster with each passing second. “It does not have to be so soon.”

“
It is only natural to be afraid, therefore, it is better to put this part behind us, lest you build it up in your mind to dramatic and unrealistic proportions.”

“
I am not ready.”

“
Don’t fight me, Victoria, darling,” he soothed, coming slowly into the room. “I am certainly not going to force you. But it is what I want, and I know it is what you want too. From the moment we met it was inevitable.”

As he moved slowly to the bed, his eyes holding her motionless, Victoria swallowed hard feeling like a helpless moth caught in a silken web of a spider, unable to move.

Until panic overtook her.

She wasn’t ready for this. She knew what she wanted. It just wasn’t the time yet.

Victoria attempted to scramble out of the bed, but her legs got caught in the bed sheets.

“
Don’t, Victoria love,” he said in a quiet, coaxing voice. William stopped moving toward her, gravely disappointed that he had frightened her. “It will be okay, I promise you.”

“
Easy for you to say, you have done this before, I haven’t,” she said, pulling her legs free and swinging them over the side of the bed.

“
It is not easy, not easy at all!” he said harshly. “You make me hate myself. I had intended to wait until you were in your new home – give you more time – but damn, I never wanted a woman so much.”

Victoria hesitated, his words moving her.

“
I wanted to wait to see you in red.”

“
Please stop,” she said, closing her eyes.

He laughed softly. “I can’t stop, and if you were honest with me, you would tell me that you feel the same. It is just that you don’t know the full story of lovemaking as I do. Instead, you look as if you have been sentenced to death,” he said, as he watched her frantically kicking away the bed clothing in an attempt to scramble away from him.

“
Let me just sit next to you on the bed,” he said, slowly advancing to the bed.

Victoria watched William warily as he approached the bed, caught in his smoky gaze. Why was she suddenly so afraid? It was silly. She was a grown woman, she knew what was involved, she wanted this, and yet this panic would not leave her.

William sat down slowly on the opposite side of the bed and reached out his hand to her.

“
I am not going to force you, Victoria,” he said quietly. Victoria stared at his outstretched hand as if it were a poisonous snake.

She didn’t want to touch him, yet his long beautiful, masculine fingers tempted her to touch him.

She knew that touching him would end this silent, sensual battle and William would be the victor.

If she touched him, she was certain she would want him with the same desire that had consumed her the other times she was with him. Then, he would have power over her that no one before him had ever had.

It was because she loved him.

And that was also why, after a moment, Victoria reached out her small, trembling hand and placed it into William’s beckoning, tempting, outstretched hand.

Whatever the future had to offer, Victoria was going to take it.

When they touched, William’s warm hand sent a delightful shiver through Victoria’s arm and through her body. Victoria did not stop William when he pulled her to him, closing his strong arms around her shaking body.

Victoria took in his faint, musky, masculine scent. Her pulse quickened.

“
I wouldn’t hurt you, darling,” he murmured against her hair, his breath warm. He gently stroked her hair and back, calming her entire being.

“
I know I should just give you the money for the store and just let you go, that is what I should do, if I was a good man that is what I would do.

But I want you so badly, and by God, I will have you,” he whispered harshly into her ear. “But I will take care of you Victoria, that I promise.”

Tilting her head back, he looked deeply into her eyes before consuming her mouth .

Any fear she had dissipated into the air. His need called to her primitive instincts and she opened her mouth in invitation. Victoria was immediately lost in the fire that burned between them. First, William touched, explored and teased every inch of her body. His mouth tasted every inch of her, starting with her lips and face and moving down her neck to suckle her rose-tipped breasts that begged for his touch.

William stroked and tasted her in the most intimate places until Victoria was ready to come off of the satin sheets. Needing more, Victoria grasped his shoulders, digging her nails into his muscled back.

“
Please,” Victoria uttered unable to say anything else. Her fear had long since been replaced by consuming desire.

“
Hold tight darling,” William whispered into her ear. “This might hurt a little so I am going to go fast.”

William came between her legs and thrust inside of her. Victoria screamed in surprise and pain.

Suddenly, the burning desire that had consumed her was replaced by a searing, white hot pain.

“
Stop,” she gasped, trying to push him off of her.

Victoria felt so full, so vulnerable, so torn, and now, so disappointed. She struggled under his weight.

“
Darling, don’t,” he whispered, his voice soothing and gentle. “I know it hurts now, but it will be alright. I thought you knew about the first time.”

She choked on the angry words that flew to her lips.

“
Not like this, it isn’t supposed to be like this!” she said, her voice quivering. What an awful experience. “This isn’t a little burning that I heard about! This isn’t a little discomfort that I heard about! This is pain!” she hissed.

“
It will be alright,” he soothed. “I promise it will only be like this the first time.”

Caressing her hair, he continued to speak to her in low soothing tones.

And soon he was moving slowly inside of her again. And the pain was forgotten.

Everything Victoria had ever thought was forgotten. She only felt intense pleasure.

Before the night gave way to dawn, she had sobbed with pleasure. William left no part of her untouched or unexplored. They did things that Victoria never dreamed men and women did. Time and space ceased to meaning. Victoria surrendered to passion that burned like a wildfire on a dry prairie.

Williams’s hands were gentle, but urgent. His whispered words evoked intense feelings pulled from the core of her being.

Just when Victoria thought the pleasure had reached the highest possible pinnacle, William would softly whisper in her ear.

“
Give me more, darling, a little bit more.”

Then he would work the magic again and again, until tears ran down Victoria’s face from the sheer pleasure of the things he did to her.

William had wanted to go easy. He wanted to hold part of himself back, but nothing had prepared him for the absolutely consuming pleasure he had found with her.

Like no other sexual encounter, making love to Victoria was truly making love with the fullness of the word’s meaning. And William lost himself inside of her hot, inviting flesh more times than he should have.

It had taken every shred of self control to go easy on her the first time, to hold him back in the midst of his own blinding, hot need. But for the first time in his life, William’s body would not listen to the things his mind wanted him to do.

Like a man dying of thirst, William had returned again and again to quench his thirst. Even now as he watched her sleep, knowing she was tired and probably very sore, selfishly, all he could think of was having her again.

And her passion matched his. His back, with the hundreds of tiny nail marks, was proof of that. Victoria had matched him and responded with the same need that had driven him. Her cries of pleasure had only fed the feverish pitch of their lovemaking. And William knew that he may have enjoyed sexual encounters many times in his life, but he had never truly made love to another until tonight.

Now, as Victoria lay in the crook of his arm, her head snuggled on his shoulder, William knew he would never let her go. Possessiveness raged through him. He could not let her go.

Victoria’s dark lashes rested against her pale skin. Her breathing was gentle and silent. William couldn’t resist the urge to push back a lock of hair that lay across her cheek.

He would give her the world. She would be the wealthiest of mistresses. Victoria would have the finest of everything. And, of course, he would never let her go.

CHAPTER 17

“
Come to the office at half past 12:00,”
the note from William read. Two days following their intimate night together, Carter handed her the note as soon as she came down to breakfast.

“
I will call the carriage for you,” Carter said, then retreated.

She had not seen William since their night together and it hurt. She had awoken the next morning to find him already gone. He had left word with Carter that he would be keeping late evenings for the next few days. Victoria had not heard him stir in his room, let alone seen him.

She was to be moved to her new house over the next few days.

Despite the fact that she had experienced the most wondrous night of her life with William, she was reminded that she didn’t need his presence or his affection and both were detrimental to her. To squelch her longing, she recalled that he was a means to an end, nothing more.

William’s use of her had been clear, and her own use of him was clear as well. She could not allow her feelings to muddy the waters.

But now he was requesting …
no demanding
… her presence at his office and she could not stop the excited drummer of her heart. How dare he demand anything of her after his obvious neglect? But of course, he would dare. He would dare anything.

And she would go even while she wanted to refuse his demand. What choice was there after all? This was part of their agreement. Being a mistress meant pleasing her man....no matter how much it galled her. Now that she had given up her virtue, she had to follow through with her plan. There was no turning back now.

The worst shame was that she wanted to go.

Victoria gulped down her breakfast and ran back up to her room. She didn’t wait for Mina to come in and help her dress. Opening the wardrobe, Victoria located a peach satin gown and pared it with a wide brimmed bonnet trimmed in matching peach ribbon and a sprinkling of tiny white flowers.

When she had dressed, Victoria fled down the steps and out the door to the waiting carriage.

Exasperated by her hasty departure, which didn’t allow him an opportunity to open the door, Carter scowled at her while Chester helped her into the waiting carriage.

Laughing, Victoria waived to Carter from the window of the carriage as it pulled out into the street.

It was a short ride to William’s office in what was known as the bourgeoning financial district. Victoria marveled at the breathtaking view of the bay as the horses struggled to hold back the carriage down the steep hill.

When they arrived at the bank, Chester helped Victoria from the carriage and with a warm smile, escorted her up the steps, and opened the bank door for her.

“
That is all I will need Chester, you can go home if you would like,” Victoria told him, smiling warmly.

“
No ma’am, I’ll be wait’in for you to come out,” Chester replied.

“
I am not sure how long I will be.” Victoria blushed.

“
It doesn’t matter, I will be wait’in right outside here for you, just like Mr. Worthington ordered I do,” Chester insisted, closing the door behind her before she could protest further.

Victoria briskly marched up the stairs that led up to William’s office. A minute later she knocked at the heavy mahogany door at the end of the hall.

“
Come in.” William’s deep voice penetrated through the door to send a shiver of sensual awareness through her.

Turning the handle with a trembling hand, Victoria entered the room.

Victoria stood in the threshold, held immobile by his hot molten gaze that reached down to her soul and stole her breath.

The lush vivid memories of what happened the last time they were together stood starkly in front of them.

William’s gaze swept over her. “It has taken every ounce of my self-control to stay away from you for the last few days—you should know that.”

“
Oh,” she said.

“
I thought I had been too hasty and harsh the first time. I wanted to give you some time to recover.”

“
Oh no—truly—that is not so, it was just—wonderful,” she murmured, breathless.

“
All the same, I was too—urgent,” he said stiffly, forcing his reluctant admission of weakness.

“
I don’t know what to say, except thank you for your concern.”