The Liberator (A Dante Walker Novel) (Entangled Teen) (22 page)

“Because they didn’t care. Because my parents didn’t give a
damn.
They said they loved me but where were they?
Where?!
They didn’t want to be around me. That’s how I know I’m bad, motherfucker, because even my parents didn’t want to touch my ass.”

There it is.

My darkness.

It’s something I’ve carried around inside me since I was a child. Something I didn’t dare talk about. My temples are wet with something. Tears, maybe. I don’t know. All I do know is that I have to get out of here, or I’ll suffocate. I throw my leg up and bring it right into Kraven’s jewels. He falls off me and lands on his side, groaning

I get up and head toward the door. This time Kraven doesn’t stop me. I feel the weight of what I just said sitting on my shoulders like a gorilla. All the memories I keep of my parents are the good ones. The time my dad finally took me on a trip with him. The time my mom made me meat loaf because I told her I liked it. But what about the others?

What about when my dad forgot my birthday year after year? What about when my mom forgot to pick me up from school when she promised she would? And I mistakenly believed her…again. I never stopped wanting them to pay attention, to notice me. And I hate myself for that. I
hate
it. I didn’t want to love them. I didn’t want to care what they thought.

But I did.

I believe they loved me. From a distance. When they had time. I try to tell myself that my dad cares now. He came to see me when I got cuffed as a liberator. And he left the ivory pendants for me and Charlie. That’s something, right?

Whatever. It doesn’t matter. Not anymore. I guess in the end, I returned their affection accordingly. After all, I made my father a corpse and my mother a widow.

You’re welcome, Mom.

You’re welcome, Dad.

Do you see what a good son I am?

I throw my fist into the wall beside me. The pain feels good, reminds me that I have pain all over—in my muscles, my bones, my eyes. But still the memories sit on my shoulders. They press me down until I can hardly walk. Press, press, press.

But I suddenly realize something, and when I do, I stop cold.

The weight isn’t inside of me anymore.

31

You Speak of War

As I make my way back to my room, the pain becomes unbearable. Instead of focusing on it, I think about why Kraven took me outside. The answer comes easily: to show me how much I need my wings. And that staying here until I can summon them is worth the wait.

I take another step, and my ankle rolls. Another one, and my knee buckles.

I’m falling.

Hours later, my eyes flutter open. The Mute Chicks stand over me. Their hands knead my muscles, and their touch feels like a unicorn’s vagina. I groan deep in my throat, and one of the girls smiles. Her cheeks redden, and I know I’ve embarrassed her, but I don’t care as long as she keeps doing whatever she’s doing.

But they stop soon enough and move away, shuffling out the door like they’re eighty years old, even though one is probably in their late twenties and the other is younger than me.

I pull myself up in bed and realize the hurt is mostly gone. I have no idea how the Mute Chicks—who I’ll henceforth call the Quiet Ones, because it’s a cooler name and I’m thankful and all—did this to me. But it’s like I didn’t almost die this morning, more like I just got kicked in the face by a Clydesdale.

The Quiet Ones reappear through the doorway with Charlie between them. One of the girls strokes Charlie’s hair while the other wraps her arm around her shoulders. Charlie seems comforted by their presence, and I suddenly understand why some liberators would choose to be
this
for her versus becoming a protector.

When Charlie is safely deposited in a chair near my bed, the women leave. Then it’s just me and my girl.

“I can’t believe he did this to you.” Charlie’s eyes are swimming with tears, but her mouth is pressed together in a tight line. She looks like she’s ready to fight Kraven herself.

I realize she thinks every injury I have is from Kraven’s hand. I measure my words carefully. “I’m learning how to better protect you.”

Her entire body flinches. I said the wrong thing.

“I’m tired of people getting hurt because of me,” she says. I expect her to repeat some version of this until she feels her point is made. But instead, she smooths her hair back and takes my hand. “But I know it’s necessary. He needs me to be strong. This isn’t about me. It’s about mankind as a whole.” Her eyes close. “And that means I’m going to have to think about everyone versus individuals I love.”

Her eyes flash back open. “You may be hurt, Dante Walker. But I won’t have you treating me the way you did this morning. You don’t make decisions for me and Blue. And you don’t make decisions for yourself that affect us, either. Do you understand?”

I’m almost as wary of upsetting Charlie as I am of Kraven’s bottled-up rage. So I nod.

“Good.” She leans over and touches her mouth to mine. The ivory pendant dangles from her necklace and tickles my chest as her hands explore the length of muscles in my back. A shiver races across my skin. Her lips hover over my ear, and she murmurs, “Valery is waiting outside.”

My head falls back, and I sigh.

Charlie laughs and moves toward the door. “I’ll be back. Don’t go getting knocked around while I’m gone.” She glances at me from over her shoulder. “The Silent Sisters are awesome, huh? They were putting all kinds of crap on you.”

“I think you mean the Quiet Ones.”

“Silent Sisters,” she repeats with a grin.

That grin is so damn stunning.

As soon as Charlie steps outside, Valery bursts into the room all business and breasts.

“Nice cleavage,” I tell her. “Looks like you’re really trying to make things easier on Max.”

She ignores my comment and sits down. Her forehead is coated in a thin film of sweat, which I know can’t be right, because girls like Valery would rather cut off their right arm than be caught perspiring.

“What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong?” Valery says, her brow wrinkling. “What’s
wrong
? Kraven never should have taken you”—she glances at the doorway— “
outside
. You could have been killed.”

Understanding pours over me. Red was worried about me. I should hug her. I should get all serious and tell her I care about her, too.

But I just don’t have it in me.

“You were scared I was going to get hurt,” I say. “You love me. I mean, you are obsessed with me. Does Max know? Oh, man. I’m the reason you and Max aren’t together right now. How did I never see it before now?”

Valery starts to get up but I grab her hand. My face softens. “Thank you, Red.” I swallow and find that small function more difficult than normal. “Thanks for caring. If it had been you instead of me, I would have shattered Kraven’s spine.”

She smiles and shakes her head. It’s the closest we’ll come to admitting we like each other.

Outside the open door, I can hear Aspen and Charlie talking. They seem to be playing some sort of game. One will start a sentence, and the other will finish it. Then they’ll laugh. I recognize Charlie’s chiming laugh over Aspen’s slightly deeper one.

“What are they doing?” I ask.

Valery rolls her eyes. “They’ve been doing it all morning. They can finish each other’s sentences almost every time. It’s pretty funny, actually.”

I try to focus on what the two girls are saying, but Valery touches my arm, bringing me back to her. Her lips press together until they’re nearly white, and then she stands and moves toward the lounge area.

“Hey, I need to talk to Dante without you guys here,” she says to whoever is out there.

“Oh, so secretive,” Annabelle says through a laugh.

Blue must make an offensive gesture because Valery yells at him and Annabelle laughs harder.

“Out, all of you,” Red orders.

There’s a shuffling of feet, and then Charlie’s voice rings out. “I’ll be back in a few minutes, babe. Want something to eat?”

A grin sweeps across my face. “How about a piece of my baby?”

“Disgusting,” Blue says, though I’m surprised to hear the word isn’t tinged with jealousy.

Valery watches them leave, then shuts the bedroom door. She sits back down. “What was he thinking? Do you know?”

I know she’s talking about Kraven. “I wanted him to teach me how to summon my wings quickly, so that I could leave sooner.”

Her eyes widen. “And did he?”

“No.” I don’t tell Red I went looking for the scroll. I’m sure she knows it’s hidden at the Hive and that there’s a decoy. I wonder how many liberators went searching for it and are walking around thinking they’re the Secret Carrier.

Valery folds her hands in her lap like a Southern belle. “Dante, I’ve been meaning to ask. Do you know how to return to hell?”

My stomach drops. “Of course I do. I worked for hell for two years, didn’t I?”

“So, how do you get there?”

Every muscle in my body tightens, reminding me there are still injuries to be healed. “That’s not something you need to know.”

Valery frowns.

“I don’t want you anywhere near there,” I clarify.

“I want to go with you.”

Her announcement is like being submerged in icy water. “Out of the question. I’m going alone.”

“But—”

“But nothing. I need you to stay here and help Kraven protect Charlie. This is my quest, Valery.” What I don’t tell her is how much it means to me that she’s willing to come along. She has to know how dangerous it would be.

Red sits back in the chair. “Kraven said there were more sirens out there this morning than there were a few days ago.”

My pulse quickens. “That isn’t good.” As Valery squirms, I decide to ask the question that’s haunted me ever since I found out sirens existed. “Do you think the sirens will try and kill her themselves? Before, they were trying to get her to harm herself, but what about now?”

Valery’s chest rises, and her boobs nearly make a full appearance. “I think Lucille is beginning to take more risks.”

I smile at her continued use of Max’s and my nickname for our ex–Boss Man. Maybe everyone will adopt the name. I’ll be famous. Hashtag Lucille.

“I think he understands that harming an innocent human will trigger war on earth between heaven and hell,” she continues. “But I also think he’s gained confidence. He already has her soul. And if he can collect her body, too—the body of Big Guy’s ordained human—then he may be ready to face the outcome.”

“So you think Lucille sees Charlie as a symbol,” I say, “and that by taking her body and soul, he’s welcoming war? Like he’s using her as an opening ceremony or something?” It’s a thought I’ve had before, but speaking it aloud invites a wave of nausea.

“It’s a war I think Big Guy would quickly accept.” Valery rubs a hand along her neck. “I heard he was tempted to declare war after Rector killed Blue. But I guess ultimately his death was ruled an accident by Big Guy.”

I think back and remember the surprise in Rector’s eyes when the gun fired. But I don’t believe his surprise meant he was remorseful. Not even for a second.

“And what about Aspen?” I ask. “Why is she so important? If you know, you need to tell me.”

Red pulls on her earlobe. “I don’t know, exactly, but I was told that liberating her soul was important to Charlie’s plight.”

“But how important?” I ask. “In a big way, or in a trivial way only Big Guy finds significant?”

“That I don’t know.” Valery meets my gaze and holds it, changes the subject. “Kraven wants three more days to train you. If he has really agreed to teach you how to summon your wings, it could be the difference between rescuing Charlie’s soul and being captured.”

Red wants the same thing I do, for Charlie to be safe, for me to liberate Aspen’s soul, so I know she wouldn’t push this if she didn’t think the extra three days would truly help our cause. Reluctantly, I nod. “Three days. But then I descend into hell and steal back her soul, and nothing, and no one, will stop me.”

A shadow appears from beneath the doorway seconds before it is flung open.

Valery gasps and releases my hand.

Aspen stands before us, green eyes blazing. She looks directly at me. “Take me with you.”