The Loner (16 page)

Kissing her jaw, her throat, he blazed a path down to one straining nipple and took it between his lips.

She cried out, lacing her fingers in his hair.

Pleased, he licked and sucked, switching from one breast to the other until the soft and needful sounds she made broke on a sob. He loved that she was so responsive. Hearing her pleasure tightened his body and fired his blood even more.

God, what sort of noise would she make if his lips traveled even lower?

With a sharp intake of breath, Logan pressed his forehead against hers. He needed to gain a measure of control and thinking about tasting her... Whoa. He swallowed hard; the image was more than he could bear.
Get hold of yourself, Grey, before you lose it here and now.
They'd wasted too many years for this to end too soon.

He levered himself away from her, standing just long enough to strip off his pants and pull the medallion over his head, before joining her again in their bed. In their marriage bed.

It was heaven on earth, the feel of her. The heat. The magic. With moonlight spilling across the bed, the desperate urgency of two souls reconnecting filled the air. Looking down at her shining eyes, Logan let himself fall into her abyss.

"I need you, Caroline," he said in a low, breathless tone. He nuzzled her ear. "I have to have all of you."

"I'm yours," she whispered. Tracing a hand over his face, she let her finger run over his bottom lip. "All these lost years, I've always been yours."

"Mine." He grinned, slowly, wickedly. "Am I a lucky man, or what?"

Caroline laughed at the smug satisfaction in his tone. She couldn't help it. Joy sizzled along her nerves as heady as desire. When he caught her finger in his mouth and sucked hard, the heat coiling within her nearly burst. "Make love to me, Logan Grey."

And so he did.

His hot mouth covered her breast again, making her moan and arch and beg as his hand eased down, touching her where she ached the most. With light fingers, he brought her to the very brink of madness, only to leave her there.

Bereft when he drew back his hand, she protested, "Logan."

"I know, sweetheart. Let me give you what you need. What we both need."

He positioned her beneath him, lying between the cradle of her thighs. Instantly, the solid tip of him probed at her wetness, seeking an entrance she was helpless to deny. Above her, his jade eyes were hooded in the lamplight as he pushed inside.

He caught her cry with his mouth. It had been such a long, long time. The pressure of his body sinking fully into hers was deliciously illicit, and Caroline wanted more. Blindly, she reached around and gripped his back, pulling him closer. Wanting him deeper. Wanting to lose herself in him. But he remained still, as if trying to savor the moment.

"My God," he mumbled against her mouth. "You feel so good, Caro. So very good."

She couldn't respond. It was all she could do to breathe. The feeling, the sensation of where they were joined overwhelmed her. She didn't want to talk. Didn't want to think. All she wanted was to feel.

Moving ever so slightly, she tilted her hips and spread her legs a notch farther. It was his turn to gasp, and feminine power coursed through Caroline. Encouraged, she lifted her body, taking more of him inside.

The look of exquisite pleasure that crossed Logan's face would be burned upon her memory for the rest of her life.

He'd closed his eyes, but his hands moved over her, holding her, pulling her closer. He couldn't seem to get enough of her, and again Caroline felt the unaccustomed well of tears. Resting her cheek against his shoulder, she hid her brimming eyes.

They moved together as if they'd never been apart. He whispered to her.. .mindless words of praise and encouragement. He told her she was beautiful, that no woman had ever made him feel like this. He said other things, too. Erotic things. Forbidden things.

During all this, he kissed her with such passion that for one moment in time, Caroline let herself believe in the impossible.

He said everything a woman wanted to hear from her man. Words that meant something. Words that mattered. Maybe that was part of it, Caroline thought as she returned his kiss. All her life, she'd wanted to matter. And right now, to Logan, she did.

She moved with him, matching his tempo and reveling in his deep-throated groan when she wrapped her legs around him. He knew how to touch, how to tantalize, when to slow, when to quicken. The swells of pleasure between them built higher as his thrusts increased.

It was the sweetest torture Caroline had ever known. Had it been this good before? she wondered. Had she been too young and too foolish to realize? How could she have lived without this for so many years?

How would she live without it after tonight?

Not wanting to think about tomorrow, Caroline banished her musings. She wanted more. She wanted him. She wanted to forget everything but the here and now.

Urging Logan with her hands and lips, the first ripple threatened and on its heels, the wave. The intensity she'd almost forgotten washed over her, the sharp, unmistakable pang of need pulled her under. Her mind empty of everything but Logan, the hard tremor snatched her breath and rocked her from head to toe.

Her last bit of control forsaken, she sobbed out her release, hearing him call out her name as he followed.

When their bodies cooled, Logan turned and settled her against him in a heartbreaking embrace.

She couldn't stop trembling. Their encounter had been so passionate, so.. .amazing. The way he'd touched her, the things he'd said. For long minutes, she tried to calm herself, but the myriad of emotions ran far too high.

He seemed to sense her distress and gently kissed her temple. Rubbing his cheek against her hair, he asked quietly, "You all right?"

She could only nod.

"Good. Because I'm certainly all right. More than all right. Caroline, that was wonderful. You're wonderful. I can't think of a better ending to a totally lousy day."

"Logan.. .I want... I need..."

After a moment's hesitation, he chuckled softly. "Again? Ah, sunshine, I'm right there with you, but I'm afraid I'm not eighteen anymore. After the day I've had, I'm gonna need a few minutes to get my oats back." Curling his arm around her again, he smiled. "Until then, I'll just hold you."

She closed her eyes against the pain and the shame and the guilt. "I'd like that."

Within minutes, he was asleep.

Caroline lay awake and miserable. She didn't deserve this, to lie here with him, cradled in his arms as if she were someone special. As if she were someone he could care about.

She didn't deserve his intimacy or his concern. She'd lied to him, played the part of a terrified mother to appeal to his sympathy and heartstrings and it had all worked like a charm. Better than she could have ever hoped.

An image of Cade flashed through her mind. Look what her lies had cost him. Logan would never forgive her.

He will hate me. Come morning, he '11 walk away and never look back.

Self-loathing ripped through her, stealing her breath and freezing her blood. Why? Why had she asked him to make love to her? Why had she allowed it? Why had she clung to him, practically begging him to make it all go away? Had she lost her mind?

She could tell herself it was insanity. Or even the human need to reconnect after the tragedy they'd experienced at the crash site. But deep down, Caroline knew it was far more than that. She'd needed to feel again what he'd made her feel all those years ago. Wanted. Cherished. Desired.

Loved.

She kept her head on his chest, counting his heartbeats, knowing the steady rise and fall of his breathing indicated the deep sleep of a sated man. Her man. If only for this one night.

Wishing morning would never come, Caroline lay in her husband's arms and cried silent tears of loss.

A beam of morning sunshine streamed through a gap in the window curtains and woke Logan from a dreamless sleep. His first thought was of the warm bundle of woman in his arms. Dammit, he'd fallen asleep without a second go-round. He must have been even more exhausted than he'd realized.

But damn, hadn't the first been fine.

He opened his eyes, a satisfied smile stretching across his face as he contemplated waking her up with lovemaking. That would be another first for her. He'd discovered he liked the idea of introducing her to a whole lot of firsts.

He propped his head on his elbow and stared at her, his smile going tender. Such beauty. Such strength. What a soldier she'd been yesterday in the wake of disaster.

Disaster. The events of yesterday intruded on his peace and worries came roaring back. He thought of Cade and the other injured passengers. He imagined Will moseying up to outlaws. With those two realities lodged in his mind, duty dimmed his desire.

He'd slept later than he'd intended, and he had a lot to do before they boarded the stage that would take them to the rail stop where they could continue their trip west. He'd better get over to the telegraph office and see what replies to the telegrams he sent yesterday awaited him. Among other things, he'd asked the young Fort Worth doctor who'd been such a help when Dair MacRae was ill to make himself available to Cade. Logan needed to know Dr. Peter Daggett's reply as soon as possible in case he needed to clear the way of any obstacles that might prevent the doctor from assisting his friend.

He hated being pulled in two directions like this— fear for his son and for his friend, as well. Despite the reassurances he'd given Caroline last night, he felt the same guilt as she had over Cade's injuries. Under any other circumstances, he'd be hightailing it back to the scene of the wreck right this very moment, but Will had to be his first priority right now, and Logan knew Cade wouldn't want it any other way.

Black Shadow Canyon. Its very name gave him the sweats. Though he tried hard to hide it from Caroline, Logan was worried sick about their son. He knew that hellhole and the villains who called it home. Killers without conscience. Men who thought nothing of murder, rape and rampage. Imagining his boy in the midst of their evil scared Logan to the bone and made him curse every hour of this delay.

He reached for a curl of Caroline's sunburst-colored hair and twirled it around his index finger. His son. His wife. These new responsibilities weighed upon his soul. Talk about firsts. This was the first time he'd woken up with a woman, thinking about more than his own wants and desires. It changed a man. For the better. Despite all the worries and concerns, it filled an empty spot inside him he hadn't even known existed.

I'II find him, Caro. If it's the last thing I do, I'll bring our boy home to you.

With that, he decided to let her sleep. They had another hard day of travel before them, and the more rest she had ahead of it, the better. He placed a gentle kiss against her bare shoulder, then eased from the bed. Ten minutes later, washed and dressed and ready to face the rigors of the day, he exited the hotel.

It was a fine spring morning, and Parkerville bustled with activity even at the early hour. Logan tipped his hat to a woman who'd assisted Caroline the night before, then detoured toward the church where volunteers were gathering for the trip to the spot of the train wreck. He approached a slim, balding man who carried a clipboard and checked items off a list as they were loaded into a wagon. "How's it going, Reverend Marshall?"

"Good. We'll be ready to pull out in twenty minutes or so, I suspect."

"Any word from the railroad?"

"Yes, and it's not good. That storm threw off a half dozen or more twisters yesterday and it tore up chunks of track over a wide area. What's good for your group is that track to the east of your accident was easily repaired. A crew out of Fort Worth should be reaching them soon. Of course, our first wagonload will have arrived by now, and this next load of supplies should set everybody up just fine until we can get folks out of there and on their way."

The news lifted Logan's spirits and he continued toward the telegraph office with lighter steps.

The bells of a door chime announced his presence when he opened the door and stepped inside. The office was a single room divided by a wooden railing with two desks behind the railing, and a table and chairs where customers could sit and compose their messages.

The operator sat behind the railing at his desk munching on crisp bacon while he pored over the morning newspaper. "We don't open until eight," he said without looking up. "A man has the right to have his breakfast in peace."

"I can't argue with that." Logan took a bill from his wallet, leaned over the railing and tossed it onto the table. "Although I am a man who appreciates extra service."

"Oh, Mr. Grey." The operator swallowed his bacon, snatched the bill and stood. "I thought you were another one of the fairgoers. Folks are driving me crazy because I'm head livestock judge and there was a problem with the pig panel yesterday."

"Sorry to hear that. Do you have anything for me?"

"Sure do. A whole stack. My overnight help had them ready when I came in this morning. He was worried that we didn't deliver them, but I told him you'd said you and the missus needed your sleep." He grabbed a pile of envelopes off his desk and handed them over. "He put 'em all in individual envelopes for you."

"Thanks, I appreciate it." Logan flipped through the envelopes, noting the senders. Dair. The doctor. His banker. Tom Addison. Wilhemina Peters. He opened the doctor's telegram first.

Excellent. Dr. Daggett promised to make Cade his number one priority.

It took Logan about ten minutes to read and respond to all his messages. He settled his bill, then turned to leave when the operator said, "Oh, I almost forgot. Your wife has a reply waiting, too. Do you want to take it to her?"

A telegram? Logan's sense of foreboding leaped to life. "Caroline sent a telegram? Last night?"

"Sure did. Came back not long after the two of you left here. Since you said to hold the others, we held it, too."

Logan recalled that she'd gone off with some women last night to help gather supplies. Must have done it then. "Sure, I'll take it to her."