The Love Series Complete Box Set (198 page)

“What are you thinking about?” I ask as I move to sit next to him.

“My dad,” he says wistfully, but no with too much sadness.

“Anything in particular?” Lacing my hand with his, I give it a gentle squeeze of support.

On a deep sigh, he stretches his legs out. “Not really. Just times like these that I miss him.” He turns to me with a look of longing in his eyes.

“What do you mean ‘times like these’?” I twist to him in slight confusion.

“We were always really close. Not that I wasn’t close with my mom, but Dad and I were just different, you know.”

Nodding in understanding, I think about the relationship I have with my own father, how he was and still continues to always be there for me. Not many people are fortunate enough to have that kind of support and my heart hurts that it was taken away from Conner.

“One of my happiest memories with him was not much unlike this one. In scenery at least,” he laughs, popping a quick kiss to my lips. “I was in high school, a junior I think. We went for a run down some nature trail. He was always training with me. He said it kept him young. After a few miles, we sat on a log and talking about the upcoming wrestling season. That man was always my biggest fan,” a soft chuckle bubbles from his chest at the same time a sad smile appears on his face.

“What did you talk about that day?” I ask on a hunch that it was something important.

“That was the day I came out to him.”

From the stories I’ve heard, I know his family was openly supportive, but he’s never been this detailed. “What did he say?”

“He laughed,” Conner waves his hand at me, chasing away my confusion. “Not like that. He was laughing because he already knew. As cliché as it sounds, he told me he’d figured it out when I was twelve or thirteen, but knew that it was something
I
had to tell
him.
After that, he told me that he’d always be there for me, no matter what” his hand squeezes mine. The wistful memory quickly changes into one that carries a touch more sadness as he adds, “Just wish his time with me wasn’t cut so short. My dad was a good man and I miss him like crazy, but that was one of my happiest memories. I’d never felt so at peace with the world. I knew that as long as I had my dad on my side, I’d be all right.”

Conner’s eyes meet mine before I lean in to kiss him sweetly. After pulling away, he asks, “So tell me one of your happiest memories.”

Rubbing a hand over my jaw and through my hair, I pretend to have to think about it, which just earns me an elbow jab in the ribs. “Okay, okay,” I choke out through my laughter.

“It was the day Braden was born,” my tone of certainty causes Conner’s face to split into a wide smile.

“Yeah, that little bugger is pretty special huh?”

“I’ll never forget when I was introduced to him for the first time.”

Hearing Maddy and Reid talking quietly inside the room, I knocked on the door softly. Peeking my head into the slightly opened door, I braced myself for the worst. Boobs freaked me out—seeing my would-be-sister-in-law half naked was not something I was really looking forward to.

“Hey,” Reid stepped toward me, waving me into the room. We did the whole half backslap half hug thing, but this one was more meaningful, lasting just a second longer than usual.

“Who would’ve thought? You? A dad?” Clapping a hand on Reid’s shoulder, we walked toward Maddy who was propped up in bed, holding a peacefully-sleeping baby.

Looking down at his new, little family, Reid smiled and laughed. “Yeah, I know. Crazy, right?”

Maddy attempted to pull herself up from her half-slumped position and winced in pain. “Here, babe. Let me help.” Reid scooped the baby out of her arms, and, without a second thought, handed the swaddled bundle to me.

The room spun and I actually had to blink the disbelief away. Set like huge, round saucers in a pudgy face, cloudy, blue eyes stared back at me. Though they weren’t hazel like his, I couldn’t help but see a glimmer of Shane in the baby’s eyes—maybe it was that they were a touch darker around the rim, or that they seemed to connect with my own. Maybe it was the family resemblance, or the innocence there, but no matter what it was, I couldn’t help but feel like I’d been given back a piece of the family I had long since thought was lost to me.

“His name’s Braden,” Reid’s voice, filled with love, floated through my haze of disbelief.

“After my dad,” Maddy explained as she stood next to the bed, tying the belt of her robe.

Reid stood on one side of me and Maddy slowly moved to the other before Reid added, “His middle name is Shane.”

At the mention of his name, my throat closed, suddenly coated in thick emotion. After letting myself feel sad for a minute, a new feeling bathed over me.

One of happiness.

“The doctor said I should try walking again,” Maddy announced, looping her arm through Reid’s.

Fumbling for words, I watched them walk toward the door. “Wait,” I finally managed. “What about him?” I asked, looking back and forth between Braden and his parents.

With a smug look plastered to his face, Reid chuckled and said, “He just ate. You’ll be fine. Say hello to your nephew and we’ll be back before you know it.” And with that, they were gone, leaving me alone with the baby who carried the name of the only man I had ever loved and lost.

“Hey, buddy,” I said softly into the bundle of blankets. My voice was met with a slow squirm. After pulling his hands out of the blankets, I stroked my finger along his round, pink cheek, and traced it along his skinny forearm.

“Gotta work on these muscles, little man,” I joked, but my laughter was cut short when he gripped my single finger with his entire hand.

“I know your daddy will tell you all about him, but
I
won’t ever let you forget your uncle.” Shaking my head, I realized he could never forget a man he’d never met, but I also knew that I didn’t need to be so careful with my words around Braden.

“He’d love you. My God, he’d love you so much. I wish he could be here, but just know that I’ll try my damnedest to be the best uncle possible.” My words were met with a huge yawn. Taking my cue from Braden, I sank into the rocking chair tucked in the corner. He fell asleep quickly as I told him about how me and his Uncle Shane first met.

“How’d you make out?” Reid called from the door, his arm wrapped around Maddy’s shoulder.

“I didn’t break him. So, I’d say it was a success,” I joked and watched in awe as Reid helped Maddy back into bed.

Idly, I thought about how I wanted that one day. Someone to love. Someone to build a family with. Someone to spend the rest of my life with.

“That’s a sweet story, Dyl,” Conner leans in, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. As he brushes his lips sweetly across mine, everything becomes crystal clear.

“It’s you,” I mutter against his lips. Mirroring my confusion from earlier, Conner pulls away from me.

“Uh, yeah. It’s me,” he jokes, looking at me like I’m a fool. Standing up next to me, he looks out at the sun at is dips low in the horizon. After dusting the dirt from his shorts, he begins picking up the garbage from our make-shift picnic. “We better get started if we want to make it back down before dark,” he says as he’s turned away from me. When I offer no response, he turns around. What starts out as a frustrated look morphs into one of shock when he sees me bended on one knee.

“It’s you that I’m meant to spend the rest of my life with,” awe colors my words. Conner opens and closes his mouth a few times, unable to find any words. “I love you and I never thought I’d be lucky enough to have someone as incredible as you in my life. And now, you’ve become more important to me than anyone.”

Still searching for something to say, Conner wordlessly sinks to his knees with me. With hands locked together, I say the words I never thought I would.

“Conner, nothing would make me happier than to spend the rest of our lives together. Will you marry me?”

His kiss is the only response I need to know he feels the exact same way. “So is that a yes?” I ask, though it seems unnecessary.

“Yes,” he says against my lips, holding my face in his hands. “Yes, of course, yes,” his words grow in excitement as he pulls me to my feet.

Spinning me around in his arms, on top of a mountain, I feel weightless. I feel in love.

For the first time in the last eight years, I feel alive.

Acknowledgements

When I started writing this series, I had no clue where it would take me. I think that’s the thing that astounds me about this process—the crazy twists and turns, the vast unknown stories that are just waiting there to be found. That’s exactly how Dylan’s story came about. When I wrote
Let Love In,
Dylan didn’t exist. I knew Shane’s background and had his story settled in my brain, but it wasn’t until
Let Love Stay
and
Let Love Shine
that Dylan really came to life. Since Shane was such a huge part of Dylan’s story, I needed to include him. As heartbreaking as it is, it was a piece of the puzzle that needed to be told. Thank you so much for following me on this journey and for loving these characters as much as I do.

This book, and all of my others, would not have been possible without the following people:

To the countless blogs who help more ways than I can ever say, especially Jesey Newman at Schmexy Girl Book Blog, Ashley Griffieth at Reviewing Romance, Nasha Lama at Unknown Book Reviews, Mayas Sanders at Reading by the Book, Donna Montville at The Whispering Pages Book Blog, Tanya Sherman Vought at The Book Obsessed Momma, Megan Stietz at The Book Eclectic and Lisa and Milasy at The Rock Stars of Romance. I can’t thank you enough for your support. Without you ladies, readers wouldn’t even know who I am.

To Sommer—You are a supremely talented designer with whom I am so fortunate to work. Thank you for making my books as beautiful on the outside as they are on the inside.

To Tami—Your work is simply breathtaking. You are so incredibly easy to work with. Thank you for being dependable and reliable. It’s such a relief to know that my book is in safe hands with you.

To Becky, my editor—Even though you started this series after
Let Love In
was already out there, you have helped me fine-tune these stories with more precision and attention to detail than I ever expected to get out of a complete stranger. Your passion for what you do is so clearly evident in every comment and suggestion you make. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for helping me make this the best possible series I could have written.

To my fellow authors in both 101 Support and #WriteClub—I can’t imagine not being a part of these amazingly supportive groups. You ladies are so strong and so helpful. Thank you for your input, support, advice, and guidance.

To my street team—I love our little group and it’s because you ladies are the best readers and fans out there. Whether it’s sharing a teaser, or commenting on a post, your help is invaluable. I cherish the friendships we’ve created and I can’t wait to bring you more of my works.

To my beta readers—Jennifer Diaz, Pamela Schaeffer, Kristy Bruno, Ashley Griffieth, Christa Cervone, Carey Heywood, Jennifer Berg, Jen Gerschick (wow, that’s a lot of Jennifers)—Your feedback is invaluable. Kermit said it best when he said, “It’s not easy being green,” and the same holds true for a beta. I know it’s not always easy to critique someone else’s work, but you ladies do it with kindness and respect. For that, I will always be eternally grateful.

To Christa Cervone—We sat across from each other at the Stamford signing in 2013 and I had my first fangirl moment. I kept telling my husband, “Her book is really good. Look at that cover.” I thought it was the coolest thing that you were raffling off sex toys and tequila. I am so glad you read for me and calmed my nerves that what I had was actually good. Thank you not only for reading but for becoming my friend as well.

To J.L. Berg—I absolutely love you and your crazy goofball attitude. I am so thrilled that we’ve become friends. Talking to you on a daily basis helps ground me; it reminds me that I’m not in this alone.

To Carey Heywood—I can’t say it enough. I love you. You’ve talked me down from more ledges than I care to count. Your ability to tell a gorgeous love story nuanced with heartbreak and healing amazes me time and time again. I never thought I’d be lucky enough to have a friend like you, but apparently, I am, because you’re never getting rid of me.

To my family—thank you for letting me go live my dream and create this world. Mom, I know you’ve read all my other books (which makes me cringe and blush like you wouldn’t believe) but if you read this one, I may make you move away. Thank you for always being so supportive. To my sons, I hope that the lesson in this book, in this series, that anyone—gay, straight, man, woman, young, old—is capable and deserving of love is one that you see from me on a daily basis. I love you all to the moon and back.

To my husband—I would be nowhere without you. You have helped me transform what started as a hobby into a successful and thriving career. From your words of encouragement to your endless support, you continue to amaze me in your capacity for loving this part of my life.

There are some serious issues in this book—ones that I tried my best to present with realness and honesty. But, since I’m neither a gay man nor a person who suffered tremendous abuse, I can’t pretend that I know what it’s actually like to experience the topics that I present. If you or someone you know is suffering and in need of support, please take advantage of these support systems:

National Suicide Hotline:
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

GLBT National Help Center:
http://www.glnh.org/