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Authors: Kathryn Blair

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CHAPTER FOUR

I
n
time, the shattering moments of life invariably assume a kindly veil of unreality. Looking back, one wonders if one could have been so shocked or hurt or even so bewildered as one

s reactions had suggested, and whatever the disturbance, it has a hardening effect on the will. Never again, one says firmly; never again!

That was Lou

s decision, and she felt the calmer for it. She let the days slip by, saw Martin Craddock and his sister a few times, met Ross casually either in the bungalow or elsewhere. Peter Whyte, the A.D.C., lent her his small car, and she took Keith for short rides into the mountains. She saw the green abundance of the mountainsides veined with silver streams, and she found native footbridges and hidden mealie patches, thatched villages and the Chekwe Mission.

There came an afternoon when, on her way back from a drive down the Zomba road she sighted Ross Gilmore

s estate car pulling away from the Chekwe stores. He appeared to have an elderly woman passenger, but he shot ahead too quickly for Lou to be able to see the stranger clearly. Her hands tightened on the wheel but she drove
on steadily and took the turn to the plantation. As she passed the lane to the main house she looked along the garden. There were no signs of life, but then it was not unusual for a house to look dead in the middle of a grilling afternoon.

She went with Keith into the bungalow, thanked Ali for the tea he brought and turned over the couple of letters which must have been sent down while she was out. One of them was from her brother in answer to her own letter; she and John had grown up separately and somehow they had never been able to bridge the gap of those early years.

The other letter Lou turned over once or twice before finding the right sort of courage to open it
.
As she had guessed from the typed address, it was from Arnold Maskell. After a preliminary enquiry about her health, which he seemed to have expected to deteriorate rapidly in Africa, he said he had been scandalized by her sudden
departure and was alarmed by the few facts her letter had set out
.


You can

t possibly take on the guardianship of a child, Lou! Think of the future, when you

re much older and he is taken to be your own child and explanations sound a little far-fetched. You may have guessed that I hope eventually to marry you—you must know it, even though we have never discussed it—but how could we possibly marry with the shadow of this child so close to us? Just think it over from my angle; don

t be guided by the devotion you had for the boy

s mother
...”

There was quite a lot of it, all in the same vein. Lou folded the letter and slipped it back into the envelope; it seemed a ridiculous and stilted epistle. Arnold was pleasant and she had always enjoyed hav
i
ng
him
as an escort. She wouldn

t have been normal if she hadn

t occasionally wondered whether he would ever ask her to marry him, and what she would reply. But viewed subjectively, from the distance of several thousand miles, he was plainly a stuffed shirt.

She slipped the letters into the desk drawer and went through to the kitchen to decide what Keith would have for supper. The ice-cream needed a final whipping, but as she set it back in the fridge she noticed that everything was bedewed. She called Daniel from his quarters.


You haven

t filled the paraffin sump!

she told him.

The fridge is getting warm inside.

The black boy shrugged his shoulders.

Ali not tell.


Well, I

m telling you. It takes six hours to freeze, so we shan

t be able to use the ice-cream this evening. Please do it at once.

Daniel

s English was scanty; it was impossible to disturb him. He shuffled away, and Lou began to clean the paraffin unit herself, on a sheet of newspaper. Her hands were black and greasy when someone entered the living-room and the familiar

Anyone at home?

not only plucked at her heart but made her more cross. She wiped her hands hastily and ran through to the living-room, almost butting into Ross as he came into the corridor.

He steadied her.

Hey, what

s the rush? Good lord, you smell like a hardware store. What have you been doing?


Why don

t you have civilized refrigerators in these parts?


Because if they

re attended to regularly,

he said tersely,

the paraffin type are more reliable than electric ones. In summer storms the lighting plant might break down but our food is always fresh! Something happened to your fridge?


The boy forgot to fill it. He said that Ali didn

t tell him; it

s too bad. Keith loves ice-cream for his supper.


I

ll send some down. And don

t glare at me as if I

m at fault. Ali

s suddenly had to go off to his family because someone

s sick.


Oh, I

m sorry. It doesn

t matter about the ice-cream.

By now, they were back in the living-room and Lou suddenly saw the woman who was seated near the window; a woman nearing sixty, with fine clear features and well-kept grey hair that was tinged with blue. She wore a tailored blue linen suit and slim white shoes, and she smiled at Lou with surprise and delight.


My word, you
are
young, I thought Ross was piling it on!


I never pile it on,

he said.

This is Lou Prentice, auntie dear. My Aunt Maud, Mrs. Acland.

The older woman held out a hand, but Lou gestured apologetically.

I

m all paraffin, I

m afraid. I do wish I

d known you were coming—but I

m awfully glad to meet you.

Ross said,

Louise, go and wash your hands and come straight back.

Lou

s nerves tightened, but before she could answer Mrs. Acland said gently,

Don

t bridle when R
o
ss is highhanded; it can be wearing. I find it best to obey him when it

s no trouble and save my
ammunition fo
r when it can do most good.

Lou smiled.

I think you may be right.


There

s a smear on your cheek,

Ross put in negligently. Then, as she turned to leave them,

Is that Peter Whyte

s ear outside?


Yes, he lent it to me.


While he

s on tour? Where do you drive?


Around,

she said vaguely
.


What would you do if you had a flat tire or the engine stopped?


I

d hope someone would turn up to help.


Very sensible,

said Mrs. Acland firmly.

But Ross was not put off.

You

re not to drive outside the Chekwe district and you must stay on the main roads. I

ll get someone to come down and look over the car before you use it again.

Lou gave him a long, exasperated look and went out of the room. She washed, used a touch of coral lipstick and went back to the living-room, to find Mrs. Acland there alone.


Ross has gone to look at your fridge,

the older woman said.

Come and sit near me.

Her birdlike eyes scanned the flushed cheeks.

You

re pretty and you have an intelligent brow. Are you frightened of Ross?


Did I look frightened of him?


No, you looked militant, but then a sort of defiance is often a mask for uncertainty and apprehension. Did you know that he sent for me?

Lou shook her head.

He did say that you come here in the dry season.


It

s generally later than this. Ross asked me by cable to speed it up this year because he

s expecting a new manager and needs this bungalow. I actually arrived sooner than he thought, so that this house should be free for the man almost at once. Tell me, how do you feel about being responsible for little Keith?


Everyone asks that. I can only say that it seems natural that I should have charge of him.


It could change your whole life.


It

s changed it already, but I don

t
mind
because I love Keith.


Well, love is what he needs, of course. I don

t suppose he receives much outward affection from Rose. My nephew isn

t the type to squander his emotions. Those are his words—not mine!

Lou laughed a little.

I’
ve been here three weeks, but that

s quite long enough to be able to recognize Mr. Gilmore

s turn of phrase. I suppose you couldn

t persu
a
de
him
to give me sole possession of Keith?

Mrs. Acland surveyed her thoughtfully.

What do
you
think
?


I rather doubt it. But I really can

t understand why he

s so keen to cling to his rights.

She thought of Arnold

s
letter, and used one of its arguments.

The woman he marries may not want Keith at all, but the child is so young that he won

t be happy unless he

s loved. With me, he

ll have everything he needs. Besides, I

m his relative, and Ross isn

t
.
As far as I

m concerned it

s like history repeating itself. After my parents died Dorothy looked after me; what more natural than that I should take charge of Keith?

Mrs. Acland clasped her hands loosely in her lap; they were good hands and ringless except for a thin gold band.

I knew the Westons; they were a sterling couple and terribly fond of the boy. Dorothy was sober-minded, and it was probably her idea that they should make you and Ross joint guardians. The Wills, I believe, were made a couple of years ago, when you were too young to think seriously about marriage, and when Ross was often heard to say that he hadn

t time for it
.
It

s possible that if one of you had been married at that time, your cousin would have appointed that one as sole guardian. As it was, she gave Keith two chances. The proviso takes care of the rest.


But it doesn

t help me at the moment

Lou said frankly.

I have six weeks longer—only five weeks if you count travelling time and settling in England. I can

t just throw away my job; it

s a good one and I like it
.


What does Ross say about that?

Lou sighed.

He mocks. All any of the local men can advise is that I marry out here, and stay.


Well
...
why not?

Lou stared at the older woman.

I didn

t expect to hear that from you.


But it would simplify everything tremendously! Surely you

ve thought about it?


Not seriously. I believe in falling in love.

Mrs. Acland twinkled.

So do I. Why not fall in love with Martin Craddock?

Lou snapped her fingers.

Just like that?


You could try. He

s a fine solid man, has a high position and money. If he married you he

d be only too happy to accept Keith as a son and I

m sure he

d devote himself to making you happy.


Even if I wanted to, I couldn

t
make
him love me.


Fudge. This is Africa, where women are at a premium. A pretty girl could manage Martin

s slow-moving affe
ctions by crooking her little fi
nger
!
Make the attempt, my dear. He

s worth it.

Lou was startled. Mrs. Acland looked
modern
and graceful, but it was difficult to reconcile her advice with her age. She said slowly,

You speak as if there

s no such thing as real love springing up between two people, whether they like it or not
.


Of course there is, but a good many people are perfectly happy without it. Marriage, for a girl in your situation
...

She broke off as Ross came into the room, and asked him
bright
l
y
,

Isn

t it time you told Lou why we came down here within an hour of my arrival?


No hurry for a few minutes.

He leaned against the wall.

Go on with what you were saying as I came in.


What was I saying?

He glinted at her.

You know well enough. Advice to the young, and all that. It was interesting.

Mrs. Acland

s bright eyes met his, disarmingly.

Oh, yes. I was telling Lou that she should marry Martin Craddock. He understands how she

s placed, and he

s the sort of man to be grateful for having a woman in love with him. As District
C
ommissioner he

s highly successful, but somehow he

s missed the more human side of life, and I should say he

s the kind to need it.

Ross said, with sarcasm,

Maudie, you

re going maudlin. The man

s old enough to be her father. I have respect and admiration for Martin but I can

t see him happily married to
a
couple of children.


You needn

t try,

said Lou shortly.


I won

t give up hope,

stated Mrs. Acland cheerfully.

Both Lou and the boy need someone to look after them, and Martin would be ideal.

With a wave of her hand she dismissed the subject.

Where is Keith now? I expect he

s grown quite a bit since I last saw him.


He

s putting his things together in his room.

Ross turned to glance at Lou, plunged his hands deep into his pockets as he added casually,

You

re moving out this evening, little one. My new manager arrives tomorrow and as my aunt has managed to reach us in time we may as well have things straight from the start. Greg Allwyn can come here to the bungalow. You and Keith will have the rooms you had before, in my house.

Lou

s grey eyes widened.

You mean ... we live with you?


Wait a minute,

said Mrs. Acland.

Do I hear correctly? Has Miss Prentice already stayed at the house?


She spent a few hours in one of the rooms on her first night at Mulera,

replied Ross.

Make what you like of it
.


Don

t snap,

said his aunt
.

Knowing you, I

m quite sure there

s nothing at all to be made of it
.
You don

t philander on your own premises.


You
think
your years make you wise,

he cast at her. Then, with exasperation,

This meeting seems to be turning into a free-for-all. I didn

t come here to argue.


No, dear,

said Mrs. Acland,

but you do seem to be in an argumentative mood. Dictatorial, too. I think we should have invited Lou up to the house, not told her flatly that she has to go there.


I

m used to it
.

said Lou.

Women and five-year-old boys have to be told, not asked. Actually, it would be better if I took Keith to a hotel
...
perhaps in Zomba.


That

s out of the question,

said Ross brusquely.

Keith stays at Mulera, so you must stay, too. I got my aunt here so that we could all be under one roof to work things out.


I haven

t any choice then, have I?

Mrs. Acland said softly,

You know, you

re by no means ideal co-guardians. Ross is inflexible and you, my dear, are surprisingly stubborn. What happens when you disagree purely about the upbringing of the child?

Ross smiled, infuriatingly.

We take turns at giving in.


Have you had your turn yet?

He laughed. "Don

t worry it sweetie. The girl has a quick temper.


I hadn

t before
I
came here,

said Lou at once.


The climate,

he told her, understandingly.

You

ll get accustomed to it
.
Will it take you long to pack?


An hour or so.


Good. I

ll come down later and have all the odds and ends that now belong to Keith put together and stored.

He paused and regarded both women with mocking expansiveness.

Let

s welcome auntie with a drink, shall we?

“I’
m afraid there isn

t any,

said Lou.

He lifted a dark eyebrow.

Been tippling in secret? That

s bad. Never mind, we

ll wait till this evening, at the house. Want any help with packing, Louise?

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