The Mercenary Knight (8 page)

“Just because the rest of my men and Reynard faun over you like you were some royal whore does not mean that every man wants you, Tanya.”

Despite his growing agitation, Conrad didn’t reply. He continued brushing his mare as if Tanya wasn’t there. He had fled to the stables to be on his own, precisely because he didn’t want to confront the pretty maid, and now she was here urging him to speak. Unexpectedly, Tanya was yanking at his arm, forcing him to look at her. Her eyes were on fire, and she held her hands to her sides in small fists.

Conrad laughed, anger feeding his words. “Jealous of what? Of taking a whore to bed? I can go to any brothel and pick any girl a thousand times prettier than you and fuck her all night long. She’ll probably be cheaper, too.”

Tanya’s eyes shot daggers at him and he knew that he had crossed a line.

“I did not ask you to rescue me. I did not ask for your food. I did not ask for your help. You offered it. When I told you I had no money because it had been stolen you offered to pay. You bought me that horse because you wanted to. I did not ask it. How dare you accuse me of being expensive?”

Conrad shrugged. He wasn’t sure what to say. Already he regretted his last words.

“You’re just like all the other knights, a self-righteous bastard. Don’t worry about me any longer, Conrad. On the morrow I’ll find an occupation in Hadford and you can be rid of me and my expenses.”

Tanya turned on her heels and stormed out. Conrad stared dumbly after her. He had seen the pain in her eyes and once again could not move to comfort her. He passed a hand through his hair. What had he done now, and how was he going to fix it?

Chapter
Eight

Tanya had had enough. She hurried across the distance from the stables to the inn, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill. She regretted going down to the stables. She knew she should have stayed at the common room with the men, but she had to talk to Conrad. She was hoping that by catching him alone she could have a quiet word with him, to understand why he had been evading her for the past week. Instead, she had lost her temper and somehow things had gotten out of hand. He didn’t want her there and she had pushed him to his limit.

She ran past the common room and sprinted up the stairs, taking two steps at a time. She had a need for Conrad that she had never felt for any man. She thought that after the vow he had made her during their trip to Wilton, there had been some sort of understanding between them. The trip to Hadford, however, had proven her wrong. Tanya’s heart ached thinking about it. Every time she had tried to approach Conrad, he’d scampered off.

Unable to stand the distance between them any longer, Tanya had gone to him in hopes that they could speak, wanting to understand if she had done something to irritate him. In the barn she had found a man that not only didn’t look her in the eye, but also lied to her. What kind of dimwitted girl did Conrad think she was? She could stand that he didn’t glance her way, but she wouldn’t tolerate a lie, not when it was so obvious. He told her that nothing was wrong but his aloof stance, his raw tone of voice and his rigid jaw betrayed him. Damn it, he had almost spit out those words at her and that had irked her to no end. Tanya just had to let her temper get the better of her and insist. The more he refused to answer, the more she knew something was amiss… until what had been gnawing at his insides burst out. Everything was clear now. The tears she had been holding back finally began to slip down her cheeks as she entered one of the rooms they had secured for the night. She threw herself upon the pallet and cried in earnest.

Conrad thought she was a whore. There was nothing wrong with the old profession, but Tanya herself was no prostitute. She only took to bed men she liked and wanted. If she had opened her legs to Wybert and Gregorii it had been because Conrad left her in such a state. Tanya shut her eyes tightly and grazed her lips with the pad of her thumb. He had barely brushed them but the sensation that coursed through her body and soul was hard to forget.

She choked back a sob. If Conrad had stayed in the room with her that night she would have given herself over willingly to him. Instead he left her with Gregorii and Wybert. He had brought it upon himself. Exasperated, she wiped away her tears and swiped back the stray strands of hair that had fallen from her braid. She’d had no idea that he had heard them, but if she had known… Tanya worried her lower lip. No. It still would have happened. As a free woman, she was free to bed whomever she pleased. Tanya clenched her fist. They didn’t have a relationship. Conrad had no claim over her. She was no object.

“But I want you. Damn you, Conrad.”

A new bout of tears began to fall as she realized her loss. Her heart ached. Why did she have to go and fall in love with a stupid knight? Love? Her heart hammered in her chest and a new sort of pain erupted inside her. She had lost him. Due to her lust, she had lost a man whose voice made butterflies dance in the pit of her stomach and whose eyes caused her insides to turn to mesh. Yes, she had gone and fallen in love with Conrad the mercenary knight. She barely knew anything about his past, but she knew what mattered. He was kind, loyal, fearless, courteous, generous, and willing to help anyone––even a poor tavern wench in the middle of a deserted road. Conrad had gone out of his way to help her, watching over her when she had bathed, protecting her from his own men. He had sworn to see her to safety and had brought her to Hadford, even buying her a horse. She smiled remembering how he had presented the beast to her.

“
Conrad!” Tanya called after him but he didn’t hear her. She had frozen in horror when he had abruptly opened the door to the bedroom. For the better part of the night she had delighted in finding satisfaction with Gregorii and Wybert but her mind never strayed far from Conrad. More than once she had murmured his name and imagined it was he touching her and pleasuring her. The harsh realization that he hadn’t even been close to her throughout the night appeared when he stood in the doorway to the bedroom. For a moment, as he stood there glaring at them, she had glimpsed his desire, but he had shut it out and replaced it with rage.

Tanya dressed as fast as she could, fastening her bodice as she hurried out into the hallway and outside. She rushed past the common room and into the stables. At the far end of the barn, she saw Conrad deep in conversation with the innkeeper. They stood next to a tawny horse, which Conrad was petting with an affectionate hand. The animal snorted and Conrad laughed. Her heart skipped a beat at the sound of his raspy laughter. She stood rooted to the spot, afraid to confront him. Unexpectedly, Conrad turned to face her and grinned like a little boy caught in some sort of mischief. Tanya couldn’t help smiling. He motioned with his hand for her to approach and her fear and worry evaporated at the sight of his warm reception.

“
Good day, my lady.” The innkeeper shook hands with Conrad and bowed his head to her as he departed, a chinking pouch in his hand.

“
What do you think?” Conrad asked her.

“
It’s beautiful,” she replied, patting the horse’s nuzzle.

“
It’s for you.”

Tanya gaped at Conrad. She knew her face must have held an expression of pure shock because suddenly he laughed with mirth.

“
For real?”

Conrad chuckled. “Yes, I convinced the innkeeper to sell her to me. He promised that it’s a serene beast and it won’t give you any trouble.”

“
You—you didn’t have to…” she stammered.

“
I wanted to.” His clear eyes spoke volumes to her and Tanya had to remember to breath. Suddenly, the moment was gone as footsteps and loud speech broke into the stables. Conrad swiveled around and his countenance became stony as Gregorii and Wybert came into view. Desperately, she tried to recapture the moment.

“
What’s her name?”

He glanced her way and she felt as if she’d been slapped, so accusatory were his eyes.

“
Dorada.”

Tanya sat up and wiped away her tears. She hesitated. She didn’t want to speak to anyone, but she felt rude denying entrance to one of the men that had been so kind to her.

“Come in.”

Johann walked into the room and softly shut the door behind him. He glanced at the stool in the corner and Tanya nodded, acquiescing that he could sit. The blond moved the chair to place it in front of her. He sat with a heavy sigh and crossed his left leg over his other knee. He leaned forward, elbows on knees and hands flexed before his face forming a triangle. His bright blue eyes studied her. Tanya stared at her fingernails waiting for him to say something.

“Personally, I think he was struck by you from the moment we found you in the forest. Even bruised you are a pretty striking girl.”

Tanya said nothing as she began to pace the small room. She felt Johann’s eyes trained on her, observing her for any kind of reaction.

“If he is so struck by me then why does he run away from me?” She spun around to face Johann.

He shrugged. “Like I said, throughout his life there hasn’t been much love. Conrad’s used to being in control and the feeling of losing it…is more than he can handle.”

Tanya shook her head and resumed pacing. She stopped and stared out the small window. The sun was slowly setting and the sky was alight with an impressive array of soft pastel colors. A flock of birds flew in the distance and she wished that she could fly away from all this turmoil. She sighed.

“It wasn’t love. It--“ she paused. “It could have been him in that room,” she said, her voice shaking. “He kissed me and ran off, leaving me with them. He didn’t want me.”

“Conrad’s afraid of his own feelings, Tanya. He’s a soldier, a captain, he’s used to being in command and when he’s around you he loses what little control he has.”

“I think you’re wrong.”

Johann lifted his shoulders, indicating he didn’t care what she thought.

“Maybe, maybe not. I’ve known the man for the past five years and before that there were rumors of his feats. He is an honorable man and his heart is in the right place.”

Tanya shook her head and stared out the window. She wrapped her arms around herself trying to shake of the feeling of desolation. There were a lot of able men in the Kingdom. It didn’t matter if he had honor or was a good man. What was important was if he had feelings for her, and after their argument, she felt that that was not the case.

“I think I would like to be alone for a while now, Johann.”

The tall man nodded in understanding. He stood up and came to her side. He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and squeezed lightly. “Don’t worry yourself, he’ll come around.”

Tanya remained quiet. She heard the soft click of the door as it closed but she didn’t move from her post next to the window. Deliberately, slowly, she began to undo her braided hair. No, Johann was mistaken. Conrad was a knight or at least had been a knight, and that sort of man brought nothing but trouble. Her mother had taught her that. She wouldn’t commit the same errors. Tomorrow morning she’d have a word with the innkeeper. Perhaps he could do with another maid. If not, she would check around Hadford. It was a big enough town and she was sure something would come up. Whatever happened, starting tomorrow she would part ways with the men, even if it broke her heart.

Chapter
Nine

“What?” Conrad glared at his horse. The animal seemed to be giving him an equally reproving stare.

He picked up the brush, which he had dropped at some point and began to comb the animal. Snippets of his conversation with Tanya intruded his mind, but the memory of the pain in her eyes caused him to groan. He leaned on Splendida’s neck.