The Nurse's Newborn Gift (14 page)

“What?”

“My place isn't set up very well for entertaining men.”

In the process of towel drying his head, he stopped and looked at her. “Good.”

“Whoa.” She held up both hands. “Down boy. I only meant, I have a twin-sized bed in a bedroom that I share with my baby. My couch doesn't open into a sleeper—” He started to speak. She held up a finger to stop him and kept talking, “which in hindsight may have been a mistake. Yes I probably should have listened to you. What I was trying to say, before you went jealous male on me,” which she kind of liked, “is that I don't have any place where we can lie down together. Comfortably.” To cuddle.

Spencer pulled her into his arms. “From now on, we'll use my place. I've got a nice big bed. We can get one of those portable cribs and set it up in the living room for J.J.”

“Always thinking.” She smiled. “I like that.”

“As for tonight.” He kissed the top of her head. “The couch is fine. When I get tired I'll head back to my place.”

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

O
VER
THE
NEXT
few weeks, Krissy began spending more nights in Spencer's bed than in her own. His orderly apartment had turned disorderly. Baby stuff cluttered his living room, dishes sat in his sink, unwashed, and dirty clothes and towels seemed to materialize out of nowhere, draped on his couch, balled on his bathroom floor, and piled in the corner of his bedroom. And he didn't mind one bit.

It amazed him how quickly he'd transitioned from happily single bachelor to contented family man, how easily he'd fallen into the role of dad for J.J., and how much he'd grown to care for Krissy, in such a short time. She didn't nag, or complain, or question where he'd been or where he was going. She didn't call him throughout the day, didn't demand his attention, and really didn't seem to expect anything from him. She was smart and sexy, fun and most importantly, independent. She was the perfect woman.

He recalled a snippet from Jarrod's letter.

Look at her. Really look. Past her pretty face and hot body, beyond her flirty behavior and sarcasm, deeper, to the sweet, thoughtful, special woman she is inside.

In the last few weeks, Spencer had done just that. And it hadn't taken him long to realize how lucky he was to have Krissy in his life. He looked to the corner of his sofa where he had J.J. propped up beside him. “What do you think of the game, buddy?” Spencer pointed to his laptop screen where ‘they' were watching NYC United play the Arizona Wolfpack, in Arizona.

J.J. smiled at the attention and shook his rattle.

During halftime Spencer called to Krissy who was in the kitchen preparing a lasagna for dinner. “How are you feeling about Patti and Bart's big news?” Their plans to relocate up to White Plains to be closer to Krissy and J.J.

“I'm actually looking forward to it.” She walked out of the kitchen, drying her hands on a towel, and came to sit beside him on the couch. “I'm anxious to get back to work. With Patti willing to babysit J.J., it's the perfect situation for me. I think having them close will be good for all of us.”

Spencer thought so, too, couldn't wait to have access to local babysitters he trusted so he could take Krissy out on dates and they could spend more time doing ‘couple' things. “My friend Steve asked if we'd like to go out for dinner with him and his wife on Wednesday. She's six months pregnant, and they're fine with us bringing J.J.” It'd be their first time taking J.J. out to a restaurant. Heck, it'd be Spencer's first time taking Krissy out to a restaurant.

“Wednesday doesn't work for me.”

What? What did she mean Wednesday didn't work for her? He waited for her to explain. She didn't. So he asked, “You have other plans?” With who?

She stared back at him but said nothing.

“With J.J.?”

“Nah, I think I'll leave the kid home alone. He can't walk or crawl yet, what trouble can he get into?” J.J. started to fuss so Krissy walked over to pick him up. “Of course, with J.J. I'm breastfeeding. I do everything with J.J. I go everywhere with J.J. He is always with me, twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week!”

“I'm sorry. Of course you'll be with J.J. Stupid question.” Spencer moved the laptop from his lap to the coffee table. “So where are you going?” As long as Spencer wasn't traveling they spent every evening and most nights together. Exactly what plans did Krissy have that didn't include him?

She swayed on her feet, rocking J.J. while rubbing his back, appearing not at all eager to tell him.

Which made him want to know even more. “What's the big secret? Why won't you tell me where you're going on Wednesday?”

“It's no big deal and I don't want you worrying that—” She stopped mid-sentence.

“Don't want me worrying about what?” He sat up straighter.

“I knew you'd make a big deal about it, so I didn't plan to tell you until after I did it.”

“Did what?”

Never one to back down, her eyes met his. “Introduce J.J. to my mom.”

Her brain-injured mother who Spencer hadn't seen since her injury, but who he'd heard plenty of stories about back in the day. “Your mother? Who has violent outbursts?” At least she used to. “Who doesn't even know who you are? Why would you put J.J. at risk to meet a woman who doesn't even know who you are?”

“Wow. That was a jerky thing to say.” Krissy walked over to J.J.'s diaper bag, picked it up and set it on the recliner. Then she started walking around the living room collecting J.J.'s things one handed. “Regardless of whether she remembers who I am or not, she's still my mother.” Krissy wouldn't look at him. “
I
remember her the way she used to be, before the brain injury turned her into a different person.
I
want to introduce her to
my
son, not because it will mean something to her, but because it'll mean something to
me
.”

He'd hurt her feelings, the very last thing he'd wanted to do. “I'm sorry.”

“You should be sorry.” She bent down to pick up J.J.'s blanket from the portable crib, balancing J.J. on her hip at the same time.

“Let me help you.”

Before he could reach her, she whipped up the blanket, nearly toppling the crib over. “I don't need your help.”

“Stop.” He grabbed her by the shoulders, turning her around so she had to look at him. “I'm sorry. Of course you should take J.J. to meet your mother. I'll go with you.” To ensure his godson's safety.

Krissy looked mortified at the thought. “You can't.”

He can't? “Oh, yes, I can,” Spencer said. “And to keep J.J. safe, I will.”

Krissy looked ready to lash out at him, but she didn't. Instead she inhaled then exhaled and said, “I'm going to ignore your overbearing statement, because I know you said it with J.J.'s best interest at heart. But to clarify,
no
, you
can't
go with us. We won't be alone. Kira and Derrick will be there. We'll all make sure J.J. is safe.”

“You'd rather have Kira and Derrick there than me? I have no say? After all I've done for you?”

Krissy went rigid. “After all you've done for me?”

“Taking you to Lamaze class.”

“You mean forcing me to go to Lamaze class.”

He ignored that comment. They both knew she had to go. “Being with you in the delivery room, buying you things.” He ticked the items off on his fingers, one by one. “Bringing you dinner, helping you with J.J., spending all of my free time with you, changing my whole life for you.” The moment the last word left his mouth, Spencer knew he'd gone too far.

“Well. Tell me how you really feel,” Krissy said calmly, way too calmly. He would have preferred it if she'd blown up at him.

“Right or wrong, that
is
how I feel,” Spencer said. “We're close enough and I do enough for you that I feel I deserve a say in you bringing J.J. into an unsafe situation. And if I want to be there, I believe I have earned the right to be there.”

“You believe you have earned the right?” Krissy glared at him. “Let's get something straight,” she said her stance rigid and ready for battle. “J.J. is
my
son.
Mine
, not yours. If I want to take him to meet my mother, I will take him to meet my mother. While I appreciate everything you have done for me, I didn't realize you were under the mistaken impression your actions entitled you to certain rights where
my
son is concerned.” She shoved J.J.'s rattle, a burping cloth, and a stuffy into the diaper bag.

“Out of respect and appreciation,” she snapped, in a tone that didn't sound respectful or appreciative, “I will explain that since my mother's attack she has developed a severe fear of men. All men. Age, hair color, ethnicity, none of it matters. If a male comes near her she reacts. If she feels threatened, she flies into a rage and goes on the attack. Other times, like if she hears a male voice, it could even be on the television if she's not right in front of the screen, she'll bang her head on the closest hard surface until it bleeds. Or she'll stab herself with a sharp object, over and over until we can get it away from her. It's not something I talk about. Now you know. The reason you
can't
come with me to visit my mother, is because you're a man. It's not safe for you and it's not safe for her.”

“So why does Derrick get to go?” Jeez. Even to his own ears he sounded like a spoiled child.

“Because he dresses like a woman, that's why.”

“He dresses like a woman? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.”

Krissy glared at him, again. “Yes. He dresses like a woman, so he can spend time with Kira while she's taking care of my mom, so he can help her and provide medical evaluation and treatment when Mom needs it.” She pointed her finger in his direction. “If you tell anyone or tease him or say one unkind word to him about it, I will never forgive you. He's a great guy.” Apparently talking about Derrick calmed her down. “He loves Kira, would do anything for her. She is blessed to have a man like him in her life.” She hefted the diaper bag and slung the strap over her shoulder.

“Don't go,” he tried.

“I don't want to intrude on your free time,” Krissy said. “Your dinner is in the oven. Timer is set.”

“Krissy...”

She reached for her pocketbook which hung on the back of a kitchen chair. The heavy diaper bag slid down her arm, throwing her off balance.

“Let me help you.” Spencer reached for the diaper bag.

“Don't.” She twisted out of reach. “Now that I know your help comes with expectations, I won't be so willing to accept it in the future.” She turned to walk toward the door. “I knew you were like Kira, I just didn't recognize how much until today.”

She said it like it was a bad thing. “What's that supposed to mean?”

“It means you do things for me, things I don't ask for, then, when you get mad at me, you throw them back in my face. If you didn't want to spend so much time with me, you shouldn't have. If you didn't want to buy things for me and J.J., you shouldn't have. If you didn't want to attend J.J.'s birth or drive us to Patti and Bart's, you shouldn't have.” She opened the door then turned to look at him. “And for the record, no one asked you to change your life for me.”

In the heat of the moment, “That's not exactly true,” shot out of his mouth.

Krissy turned, slowly. “What did you say?”

Spencer regretted his words instantly and did not want to repeat them.

Krissy stood there, staring laser beams of rage in his direction.

Everything inside of him screamed now was not the time to tell her, that he should wait to explain after they'd both had a chance to calm down.

“Tell me,” Krissy demanded. “You've got something to say, say it. Let's get everything out in the open, right here, right now.”

At this point he'd do anything to be done with this fight, so they could talk it out and move on. So he told her the truth. “In his letter,” Spencer explained. “Jarrod asked me to help you with J.J. To help you raise J.J.”

Her eyes met his. “Jarrod didn't trust me to do it on my own?” Anger turned to hurt. She curled a protective arm around J.J. “He didn't think I'd be a good mother? That's the only reason you...” Anger flared back to life. “That's the only reason you've been so nice to me? To worm your way into my life, so you can help raise J.J., because Jarrod asked you to?”

“No—”

“How could I have been so stupid to think you actually cared about me?”

“Krissy—”

“Well at least you got some great sex out of it, right? If you have to change your life for a woman you hate, and pretend to like her and care for her baby, because your dead friend asked you to, at the very least you deserve lots of great sex...as payment for all you've sacrificed.”

“I didn't—”

“Don't you dare say you didn't enjoy it,” she yelled. “I am one hundred percent certain you were at least happy to have me in your bed, and that you enjoyed yourself as much and as often as I did.” Her eyes met his, full of challenge. “If you say otherwise you're a liar.”

Spencer's nosy neighbor across the hall opened her door and stuck her head out.

“Come back inside,” Spencer said calmly as he walked toward Krissy. “Let me explain.”

“There's nothing to explain. Jarrod trusted me to give birth to his baby but not to raise it. So he sicced
you
on me, and you took full advantage of that.” J.J. started to cry. Krissy bounced him in her arms as she fired off her parting shots. “As of today I am officially done with you. Stay away from me. Don't try to talk to me. Don't look in my direction. Don't even think about me. As of this very second, you are as dead to me as Jarrod is.”

With that she turned and stormed away.

Spencer let her go. He had no choice. She was so upset, there was no way they could have a rational conversation. With a nod to his neighbor he closed his door. He'd give Krissy a few hours to calm down. Then he'd go to her apartment to apologize...and tell her the whole truth.