The Oxford dictionary of modern quotations (80 page)

1874-1958

Ah! the clock is always slow;

It is later than you think.

Ballads of a Bohemian (1921) "It Is Later Than You Think"

When we, the Workers, all demand: "What are WE fighting for?."..

Then, then we'll end that stupid crime, that devil's madness--War.

Ballads of a Bohemian (1921) "Michael"

This is the law of the Yukon, that only the Strong shall thrive;

That surely the Weak shall perish, and only the Fit survive.

Dissolute, damned and despairful, crippled and palsied and slain,

This is the Will of the Yukon,--Lo, how she makes it plain!

Songs of a Sourdough (1907) "The Law of the Yukon"

A bunch of the boys were whooping it up in the Malamute saloon;

The kid that handles the music-box was hitting a jag-time tune;

Back of the bar, in a solo game, sat Dangerous Dan McGrew,

And watching his luck was his light-o'-love, the lady that's known as

Lou.

Songs of a Sourdough (1907) "Shootings of Dan McGrew"

A promise made is a debt unpaid, and the trail has its own stern code.

Songs of a Sourdough (1907) "Cremation of Sam McGee"

19.47 Anne Sexton =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

1928-1974

In a dream you are never eighty.

All My Pretty Ones (1962) "Old"

19.48 James Seymour and Rian James =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

1899-

You're going out a youngster but you've got to come back a star.

42nd Street (1933 film)

19.49 Peter Shaffer =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

1926-

All my wife has ever taken from the Mediterranean--from that whole vast

intuitive culture--are four bottles of Chianti to make into lamps, and two

china condiment donkeys labelled Sally and Peppy.

Equus (1973) act 1, sc. 18

Passion, you see, can be destroyed by a doctor. It cannot be created.

Equus (1973) act 2, sc. 35

19.50 Eileen Shanahan =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

The length of a meeting rises with the square of the number of people

present.

In New York Times Magazine 17 Mar. 1968

19.51 Bill Shankly =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

1914-1981

Some people think football is a matter of life and death. I don't like

that attitude. I can assure them it is much more serious than that.

In Sunday Times 4 Oct. 1981

19.52 Tom Sharpe =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

1928-

The South African police would leave no stone unturned to see that nothing

disturbed the even terror of their lives.

Indecent Exposure (1973) ch. 1

Skullion had little use for contraceptives at the best of times.

Unnatural, he called them, and placed them in the lower social category of

things along with elastic-sided boots and made-up bow ties. Not the sort

of attire for a gentleman.

Porterhouse Blue (1974) ch. 9

19.53 George Bernard Shaw =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

1856-1950

All great truths begin as blasphemies.

Annajanska (1919) p. 262

One man that has a mind and knows it can always beat ten men who havnt and

dont.

The Apple Cart (1930) act 1

What Englishman will give his mind to politics as long as he can afford to

keep a motor car?

The Apple Cart (1930) act 1

Breakages, Limited, the biggest industrial corporation in the country.

The Apple Cart (1930) act 1

I never resist temptation because I have found that things that are bad

for me do not tempt me.

The Apple Cart (1930) interlude

Arms and the man.

Title of play (1898). Cf. Virgil in Oxford Dictionary of Quotations (1979)

557:8

You can always tell an old soldier by the inside of his holsters and

cartridge boxes. The young ones carry pistols and cartridges; the old

ones, grub.

Arms and the Man (1898) act 1

Oh, you are a very poor soldier--a chocolate cream soldier!

Arms and the Man (1898) act 1

I never apologize!

Arms and the Man (1898) act 3

Youre not a man, youre a machine.

Arms and the Man (1898) act 3

You see things; and you say "Why?" But I dream things that never were; and

I say "Why not?"

Back to Methuselah (1921) pt. 1, act 1

Make me a beautiful word for doing things tomorrow; for that surely is

a great and blessed invention.

Back to Methuselah (1921) pt. 1, act 1

I enjoy convalescence. It is the part that makes illness worth while.

Back to Methuselah (1921) pt. 2

Silence is the most perfect expression of scorn.

Back to Methuselah (1921) pt. 5

Life is not meant to be easy, my child; but take courage: it can be

delightful.

Back to Methuselah (1921) pt. 5

A strange lady giving an address in Zurich wrote him [Shaw] a proposal,

thus: "You have the greatest brain in the world, and I have the most

beautiful body; so we ought to produce the most perfect child." Shaw

asked: "What if the child inherits my body and your brains?"

In Hesketh Pearson Bernard Shaw (1942) p. 310

He is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are

the laws of nature.

Caesar and Cleopatra (1901) act 2 (said by Caesar of his secretary,

a Briton)

When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares

that it is his duty.

Caesar and Cleopatra (1901) act 3

He who has never hoped can never despair.

Caesar and Cleopatra (1901) act 4

A man of great common sense and good taste, meaning thereby a man without

originality or moral courage.

Notes to Caesar and Cleopatra (1901) "Julius Caesar"

We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to

consume wealth without producing it.

Candida (1898) act 1

Do you think that the things people make fools of themselves about are any

less real and true than the things they behave sensibly about? They are

more true: they are the only things that are true.

Candida (1898) act 1

It is easy--terribly easy--to shake a man's faith in himself. To take

advantage of that to break a man's spirit is devil's work.

Candida (1898) act 1

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller.

Candida (1898) act 3

The worst sin towards our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be

indifferent to them: thats the essence of inhumanity.

The Devil's Disciple (1901) act 2

Martyrdom...is the only way in which a man can become famous without

ability.

The Devil's Disciple (1901) act 3

I never expect a soldier to think.

The Devil's Disciple (1901) act 3

swindon: "What will history say?"

burgoyne: "History, sir, will tell lies as usual."

The Devil's Disciple (1901) act 3

Your friend the British soldier can stand up to anything except the

British War Office.

The Devil's Disciple (1901) act 3

There is at bottom only one genuinely scientific treatment for all

diseases, and that is to stimulate the phagocytes.

The Doctor's Dilemma (1911) act 1

All professions are conspiracies against the laity.

The Doctor's Dilemma (1911) act 1

I don't believe in morality. I am a disciple of Bernard Shaw.

The Doctor's Dilemma (1911) act 3

I believe in Michael Angelo, Velasquez, and Rembrandt; in the might of

design, the mystery of colour, the redemption of all things by Beauty

everlasting, and the message of Art that has made these hands blessed.

Amen. Amen.

The Doctor's Dilemma (1911) act 4

Parentage is a very important profession, but no test of fitness for it is

ever imposed in the interest of the children.

Everybody's Political What's What? (1944) ch. 9

A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support

of Paul.

Everybody's Political What's What? (1944) ch. 30

It's all that the young can do for the old, to shock them and keep them up

to date.

Fanny's First Play (1914) "Induction"

You don't expect me to know what to say about a play when I don't know who

the author is, do you?

Fanny's First Play (1914) epilogue

If it's by a good author, it's a good play, naturally. That stands to

reason.

Fanny's First Play (1914) epilogue

Home life as we understand it is no more natural to us than a cage is

natural to a cockatoo.

Getting Married (1911) preface "Hearth and Home"

The one point on which all women are in furious secret rebellion against

the existing law is the saddling of the right to a child with the

obligation to become the servant of a man.

Getting Married (1911) preface "The Right to Motherhood"

Physically there is nothing to distinguish human society from the

farm-yard except that children are more troublesome and costly than

chickens and calves, and that men and women are not so completely enslaved

as farm stock.

Getting Married (1911) preface "The Personal Sentimental Basis of

Monogamy"

What God hath joined together no man ever shall put asunder: God will take

care of that.

Getting Married (1911) p. 216

Sam wanted to make a Goldwyn writer of George Bernard Shaw. They

discussed it over tea one day in London.... A version of the conversation

was cabled over to Howard Dietz, Goldwyn's publicity chief; he compressed

Shaw's words into: "The trouble, Mr Goldwyn, is that you are only

interested in art and I am only interested in money." This was cabled back

to London and released there. It added considerably to Shaw's reputation

as a wit.

Alva Johnson The Great Goldwyn (1937) ch. 3

I am a woman of the world, Hector; and I can assure you that if you will

only take the trouble always to do the perfectly correct thing, and to say

the perfectly correct thing, you can do just what you like.

Heartbreak House (1919) act 1

Go anywhere in England where there are natural, wholesome, contented, and

really nice English people; and what do you always find? That the stables

are the real centre of the household.

Heartbreak House (1919) act 3

The captain is in his bunk, drinking bottled ditch-water; and the crew is

gambling in the forecastle. She will strike and sink and split. Do you

think the laws of God will be suspended in favour of England because you

were born in it?

Heartbreak House (1919) act 3

Money is indeed the most important thing in the world; and all sound and

successful personal and national morality should have this fact for its

basis.

The Irrational Knot (1905) preface

Reminiscences make one feel so deliciously aged and sad.

The Irrational Knot (1905) ch. 14

A man who has no office to go to--I don't care who he is--is a trial of

which you can have no conception.

The Irrational Knot (1905) ch. 18

An Irishman's heart is nothing but his imagination.

John Bull's Other Island (1907) act 1

My way of joking is to tell the truth. Its the funniest joke in the world.

John Bull's Other Island (1907) act 2

What really flatters a man is that you think him worth flattering.

John Bull's Other Island (1907) act 4

There are only two qualities in the world: efficiency and inefficiency,

and only two sorts of people: the efficient and the inefficient.

John Bull's Other Island (1907) act 4

The greatest of evils and the worst of crimes is poverty. our first

duty--a duty to which every other consideration should be sacrificed--is

not to be poor.

Major Barbara (1907) preface

The universal regard for money is the one hopeful fact in our

civilization, the one sound spot in our social conscience. Money is the

most important thing in the world. It represents health, strength, honour,

generosity and beauty as conspicuously and undeniably as the want of it

represents illness, weakness, disgrace, meanness and ugliness. Not the

least of its virtues is that it destroys base people as certainly as it

fortifies and dignifies noble people.

Major Barbara (1907) preface

Cusins is a very nice fellow, certainly: nobody would ever guess that he

was born in Australia.

Major Barbara (1907) act 1

Nobody can say a word against Greek: it stamps a man at once as an

educated gentleman.

Major Barbara (1907) act 1

I am a Millionaire. That is my religion.

Major Barbara (1907) act 2

I can't talk religion to a man with bodily hunger in his eyes.

Major Barbara (1907) act 2

Wot prawce Selvytion nah?

Major Barbara (1907) act 2

Alcohol is a very necessary article... It makes life bearable to millions

of people who could not endure their existence if they were quite sober.

It enables Parliament to do things at eleven at night that no sane person

would do at eleven in the morning.

Major Barbara (1907) act 2

He knows nothing; and he thinks he knows everything. That points clearly

to a political career.