His eyes got watery. Then his mom did something she hadn’t done in a long time. She swiveled him around, pulled him to her chest and wrapped her arms around his neck. He held on tight.
When he composed himself, he drew back.
She smiled down at him. “Want to go out with me tonight and talk?”
“Yeah, but can it not be about anything serious?”
“Absolutely.” She cocked her head. “Here’s the deal. We’ll go to Bill Grayson’s and get a hot dog and some of their spicy fries. We won’t even mention Jamie or Dad or Luke.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
She walked to the door.
“Mom?” She looked back. “I love you.”
“I love you, too, buddy.”
*
The day after her dinner with Brian, Maggie followed through on one of the hardest decisions she’d ever had to make in her life. But Luke’s suicide attempt had sobered her and she knew she couldn’t let the strife in her extended family go on. There was only one way she could think of to fix it. So she climbed the steps and knocked on the heavy wooden door of the rectory. When Father Pete opened it, he smiled. “Hello, Maggie. Come in.”
She stepped into what she’d always referred to as the inner sanctum. She’d been there before, of course, but today the house seemed bigger, darker, maybe even holier with its high ceilings, ornate wood trim, and hushed atmosphere. Father Pete led her to his office, which complemented the hallway décor. “Sit down, please.”
Maggie took a chair. Father Peter didn’t circle the desk but sat next to her instead. “I was surprised to get your call. You said this wasn’t about Jamie and Mike, though.”
“No, it’s not. It’s about my mother.”
“I’ve been praying for her. And you.”
“You said if you could ever help me with my mother to call you.”
“I meant that. What is it you think I can do?”
Though it galled her to ask, she’d beg on her knees if she had to. So much was clearer lately. “I was wondering if you could visit her at Sara’s house.”
He cocked his head. “And?”
“Tell her it’s all right to forgive Caroline.”
“Everyone should forgive, Maggie. I can do that easily. But I can’t tell her what Caroline did in marrying a divorced man was acceptable to the church.”
“I figured that, but I don’t think it matters. All I want is for her to see Caroline, get to know her and her family, to let my sister back into our lives. I think if you give her permission to do that, she will.”
He waited a long time, and Maggie was afraid she’d made a mistake to come here. “I truly believe that’s what God would want her to do.”
Tears filled Maggie’s eyes.
“I can see you’re surprised. Did you think I’d punish you for not agreeing with me about Jamie?”
“That’s the Catholic Church I know, Father.”
“It’s not what I preach or believe in.” He checked his calendar on the desk. “I can go tomorrow, if it’s all right with your family.”
“I’m sure it will be. I’ll call Sara and let her know.”
He faced her again. “How will we do this?”
“I’m hoping Mike will drive you over.”
“Not you?”
“She won’t see me.”
“Hmm, maybe I can help with that, too.”
“Thank you so much, Father Pete.”
His smile was serene when he gazed down at her. “God would want this, Maggie. And I’m simply here to do His work.”
*
Melissa Fairchild returned from Greece and Maggie set up an appointment with her as soon as possible. When she entered the office, they hugged. Melissa drew back and studied Maggie. “I wish you’d agreed to the phone sessions. You look worse for the wear, I’m afraid.”
“I probably should have.” They sat in their usual spots and Maggie was glad for the sun streaming in the window and warming her.
“Tell me what’s going on. Last time I saw you, Caroline had come into your life again and right afterward, Jamie told you he’s gay. What’s happened since then?”
“We’ve been dancing in the dark, fumbling our way through Jamie coming out.”
“What’s happened?”
Where to start? She told her therapist about Jamie’s boyfriend and how that relationship had developed. “Luke tried to commit suicide, Melissa.”
“Oh, no. Is he all right?”
For a half hour, Maggie filled Melissa in on the school incidents and Lucas Crane’s actions that led to Luke’s attempted suicide.
“Dear Lord. I hope the boy’s getting some help.”
“He is. Jamie, too.”
When Maggie didn’t continue, Melissa took the lead. “What about Mike?”
Maggie started to cry as she described what had happened in her marriage since the counselor left. Melissa passed her the Kleenex box. “Things between us are better now. But it’s been a real mess.”
When Maggie confided what almost happened with Damien Kane and Laura Simpson, Melissa said, “Close call. But I think the operative word is
almost
.”
“Maybe. Mike and I are coasting. I’ve mentioned counseling. He’s thinking about it. No decision as of yet. It’s making me crazy but I’m trying not to push him.”
“Which is hard for you but probably for the best.”
“He’s really put himself out for my extended family. I asked Father Pete to go over and see my mother and Mike took him.”
“That’s a huge step for you to turn to the Catholic Church for help.”
“These days I’ll do anything if it eases the strife in my family.”
“How’d it go?”
She told Melissa of Mike’s visit…
Maggie had been waiting nervously in the kitchen for Mike to return. When he came through the door, he said, “It went well, Maggie. Father Pete told your mother the church, God, would want her to forgive Caroline for her sins—his phrase—and that a real Christian woman would take her family back into the fold.” He rolled his eyes. “It was all that religious and biblical language that he knew your mother would like.”
“W-what did she say?”
“That she’d do whatever Father Pete suggested. Truthfully, I felt sorry for her. She seemed relieved. Like somewhere in her heart she wanted to do this all along.”
“Mike, will she see me, too?”
“Yes, honey, she’ll see you…”
“What did Caroline say about all this?” Melissa asked when Maggie had finished.
“That she’d go along with it. She told me no one ever really gets over their need to please a parent and she’s willing to swallow a lot to make some kind of peace.”
“Has that happened yet?”
“No.”
“Not to put a damper on the good news, but don’t expect it to be smooth sailing with Gertrude, even now.”
“I know, but it’s a start.”
“Will you tell her Jamie’s gay?”
“No, not now, anyway. She couldn’t handle it without causing more havoc, and I won’t do that to my son.” She thought of Lucas Crane, of Judy and Craig Johnson, of Julianne and Eric Cummings. “I’ve realized not everybody will accept our family as it is. I’m done trying to change all that.”
“I think—”
The doorbell downstairs rang. Melissa startled and glanced at the clock. “Who on earth would that be?” She whipped out her appointment book. “I didn’t schedule anyone else for the next hour. I’ve got you down for two.”
“Go check if you need to.”
“Sorry for the interruption.”
She left the room. Maggie could hear her footsteps on the stairs. The door open. A male voice. Melissa’s voice. Then noise on the steps again.
Melissa came through the doorway—with Mike behind her. “Look who’s here.”
“Mike? What are you doing?”
He stuck his hands in the pockets of his jeans. He wore a taupe blazer with a brown T-shirt beneath, a style she’d always loved. “I knew you had this appointment and it was two hours long. I waited outside in the car for an hour so you could talk to Melissa alone. Then I came in.”
“Why?”
“Because I took what you said to heart about marriage counseling.”
“Oh, Mike.”
His expression sheepish, he sat down and grasped her hand in his big, safe, comforting one. “We need help, honey. I know that.”
“Well,” Melissa said.
Maggie glanced over at her. It was the very first time she’d ever seen tears in her therapist’s eyes.
*
A week before the prom, Jamie and Luke sat in the back seat of his mom’s car on their way to the Gay Pride Parade and Festival in the city. He’d followed the event on the Internet for years and gone down last summer to stand with the crowd. Aunt Caroline and Terry and Chloe had planned to march, too, but Chloe and Terry got sick, so his aunt had stayed home with them. Still, they had the two most important women in their lives with them.
His mom glanced in the rearview mirror. “You guys doing all right back there?”
He and Luke exchanged an indulgent look. Both moms in the front seats were pretending to be casual about this, but he could tell they were nervous.
“Yeah, we are,” Jamie said.
She glanced at Erin. “Let’s enjoy ourselves.”
Every time his mom showed this kind of support, Jamie felt good inside. His dad was doing better, too, though he couldn’t quite bring himself to come today. Same for Brian. Jamie had decided to settle for their acceptance even if he couldn’t change their beliefs. His dad
had
surprised them all, though…
They were eating supper one night when he announced, “I went to see Shirley Lewis today.”
“Really, what for?” his mom asked.
“I tried to talk her into changing her mind about the pre-prom party.”
“What did she say?”
“No.” He sighed. “So I told her we were going to have a party of our own.”
Jamie stared open-mouthed at his father.
His mom stared open-mouthed at her husband.
His dad’s eyes narrowed on them. “I suppose I deserve those shocked expressions on your faces.” He’d addressed Jamie directly. “I’m working on my issues with the church, Jame, but in the meantime, I won’t sit on the sidelines while anyone discriminates against you.”
Jamie had stood, crossed to his father and hugged him. “Thanks Dad. I-I love you,” was Jamie’s response.
“I love you, too…”
Luke interrupted his thoughts. “I’ve read about this parade before. It gets political—there’ll be protestors here.”
“Ah, like the old days.” His mom smiled. In her college years, she’d fought for Roe vs. Wade, campaigned against the conservative candidates for the presidency, and picketed the spending of money on weapons of war.
Jamie chuckled. “My mom, the activist.”
Surprising them all, Mrs. Crane said, “Me, too.”
Luke’s jaw dropped. “Honest?”
His mother sniffed, faking insult. “Yes, Lucas, honest. When I was in college I protested against poverty. I even marched on Washington and worked on a small Democratic campaign in my hometown before I met your father.”
It was fun, listening to both mothers recount their younger days. Luke held Jamie’s hand and they smiled most of the way downtown.
They met people from their church at the designated site. They were all wearing the bright yellow UCC T-shirts and the organizer had brought extras, which Luke, Jamie, and their mothers donned. The church group was made up of both gay and straight people. There were kids ranging from fourteen to seventeen in the group, and an eighty-year-old man named Al and his wife Janet were set to follow the group in a truck, the outside of which sported UCC slogans. When Anabelle arrived, wearing her collar with tan shorts and sandals, he and Luke helped her get the big banner out of her van.
Someone handed their mothers buttons. His mom pinned hers to her shirt. Luke pretended not to notice his mom didn’t do the same with hers. He turned away to watch the float in front of them, which consisted of a gay men’s choir in drag. Jamie knew Luke’s father had shown no support at all for him, but he thought his mother was beginning to come around.
Jamie started toward him when he saw Erin Crane grab her son and turn him around. “Luke?”
“Yeah?” he said hoarsely.
His mother smiled. “I thought you could help me with this.”
Luke’s Adam’s apple bobbed. His hands were shaky as he pinned the same button on his mom as Jamie’s mother wore. It read
Proud mother of a gay son
.
“Ready, guys?” Anabelle asked.
“Yeah, we are,” Jamie answered.
Anabelle glanced at a woman approaching them.
“Lisel, there you are.” Anabelle slid her arm around her partner and kissed her on the mouth. Right out in the open. Luke smiled at them, his mother tried to hide her surprise and even Jamie’s own mom seemed a bit taken aback about the public display of affection.
They formed lines and got ready to march. Anabelle carried a sign that read PRIDE IN THE PULPIT. A pretty blond parishioner named Gwen, with her gay brother, Ron, took either side of a long banner announcing their church contingent. Another woman, Penny, who’d asked Jamie to be on a committee at church that needed a teenager, held up a sign that read OUR FAITH IS OVER 200 YEARS OLD, OUR THINKING IS NOT. The kids made up candy favors, attached to cards with the church’s information on them, and tossed them out to the scores of people who lined the streets. Others from the congregation held signs that read WE DON’T SING “COME SOME OF YE FAITHFUL and DIVERSITY WITHOUT DIVISION; UNITY WITHOUT UNIFORMITY.