The Perfect Rake (47 page)

He was getting the hang of this vow thing, he realized. It wasn’t nearly as difficult as he’d imagined. Not when Prudence was involved.

“I’d like a bath now, before I go to bed,” Prudence declared as Sir Oswald’s carriage disappeared into the night.

Gideon stared. “Do you mean you wish to stay the night here, at this inn?”

“Yes.”

“But don’t you want to return to Bath? You have no chaperone, now that Sir Oswald has left with your grandfather.”

“No,” she agreed. “But I have done quite enough traveling for one day, so here I shall stay. You may arrange a bedchamber with the landlord while I arrange a bath.” And off she went to find the landlady.

Shrugging, Gideon went downstairs to bespeak a couple of private bedchambers. Luckily there were two, one on either side of the private sitting room where the late events had taken place. He ordered fires be lit in both chambers and a brandy to be brought for himself and sat down to mull over the events of the night.

Some time later, Prudence appeared at the door. She was dressed in a garish, flowered dressing gown much too large for her. Her skin glowed from her bath, and her hair curled in damp, flame-colored corkscrews around her face. She looked fresh and wholesome, and when she smiled shyly at him, Gideon had never seen anything more beautiful in his life.

“I thought you would be in bed by now,” he said. “How do you feel?”

She smiled. “Much better, thank you. The landlady had some herbal salve that was wonderfully efficacious. That, and the bath have made a new woman of me.”

“Are you thirsty? Hungry? Shall I order—”

“No, thank you. All I need is to speak to you.” She pulled a chair up opposite him and sat down. She folded her hands in her lap, wiped the palms, then folded them again. “When I was first tossed into the coach, I was very frightened and confused.”

“I don’t think I will ever forgive mys—”

“Please, just listen.” He subsided, so she continued. “When I realized it was Grandpapa, and that he was in as black a mood as I’d ever experienced…well…” She took a breath and blurted it out. “I thought I might die before this night was through. He nearly killed me once before…”

The time she lost the baby, thought Gideon. “My poor—”

“No, please.” She held up a hand to stop him. “I want to say this. I need to explain. At first, all I could think of was that I would die. And then I thought of you. My thoughts of you made me feel better. Stronger.” Her eyes were misty as she said softly, “I know you blame yourself for not protecting me, Gideon, but no one is to blame except Grandpapa for the kidnapping. And you did protect me, in a way. I could have been lost in terror, but I wasn’t. I knew you’d come. That gave me strength, and hope, and because of it, I was able to escape the coach and reach help in the inn.”

Gideon felt immensely humbled. He would probably go to his grave regretting that he let her walk home alone, but her forgiveness touched him deeply.

“While I was trapped in the coach, I thought, what if I die without ever making love with him?”

He made a small, choked sound, but she continued. “What if I never get the chance to tell him how much I love him?” Her eyes were luminous with unshed tears. “I will waste no more of the time I have on this earth, and I want to tell you now that I love you with all my heart, and all my soul, and all my body. And tonight I want to lie in your arms. If you’ll have me.”

If he’d have her?
Didn’t she know he’d give his life for her?

He swallowed. “Are you sure of this?”

She nodded. “Quite, quite sure.”

The look in her eyes drove every coherent thought from his mind. He could say not a word, for fear that he would weep. It took him a moment to gather himself.

After all she had been through tonight—Otterbury’s public betrayal and then her grandfather’s violent kidnapping—she wanted him. Prudence wanted Gideon. Trusted
him
to love and comfort her.
Tonight I want to lie in your arms.

Slowly, Gideon stood. He remained still and silent, looking down at her, this small, beautiful, gallant lady who had come to mean all the world to him. He could not speak, could only feel.

And slowly, slowly, he held out his hand to her in a gesture old as time. It trembled a little. Without hesitation she placed her hand in his, her smile unshadowed, trusting, full of more love than he had ever dreamed of, or deserved.

And so, his heart thick with love and pride and humility, Gideon led his Prudence to the bedchamber.

Chapter Twenty-one

“And we shall all the pleasures prove.”

A
NDREW
M
ARVELL

T
HE BEDCHAMBER WAS SMALL AND SPARE AND SIMPLE.
T
HERE WAS
one bed covered with a simple blue counterpane, a few rag rugs, a dresser, and a chair. There was a faint scent of camphor in the air. The room was spotlessly clean, and a fire crackled merrily in the grate. Two brass candlesticks gleamed in the firelight; one on the dresser, which had been lit, and one beside the bed, which had not.

Wind tossed the nearby trees about and rattled the panes of the small windows, but the candles in their room glowed with a sure and steady light, undisturbed by any draft. They were well protected from the world outside.

Prudence dropped his hand, hurried over, and turned back the bed in a housewifely manner. She took the unlit candles and carefully lit them from the ones on the dresser, then turned and looked at him, her eyes huge in a pale face. She smiled briefly, licked her lips, then tried it again, a brave little smile.

She was nervous. Of course she was. Despite Otterbury, despite the pregnancy, she was still very much an innocent. He tried to think of what he could say to reassure her. He could think of not a word.

“I’m not afraid,” she said, though she was shaking like a leaf. “Just a little bit cold.” Her hands gripped the landlady’s dressing gown convulsively, crushing it to her in bunches of anxiety.

“I know.” He took her hand and untangled it from the bunch and drew her closer. The scent of camphor was all around him. His fingers were trembling, too, he noted wryly. He raised first one cold, little hand, then the other, and kissed each reverently. “Cold hands, warm heart,” he said, aware even as he said it of the inanity. All his address had deserted him.

“I want this, I really do.” She smiled tremulously, moved closer, and lifted her arms to wrap them around his neck.

“I know.” And suddenly they were kissing, and all his hesitation dissolved. His mouth was gentle, teasing, coaxing, reassuring. She tasted of warmth and sweetness and Prudence, and he could not get enough of her. He had all the time in the world, he told himself, though his body was rigid with desire and trembling with want, but this night was for Prudence. Her satisfaction and pleasure were all he desired.

He reached for the tie on her dressing gown. He undid it, slid the sleeves down her arms, and tossed it over the chair. And one small mystery was solved.

Underneath the landlady’s voluminous flowered dressing gown, Prudence was wearing the landlady’s equally voluminous best linen nightgown. Gideon knew it was her best nightgown not only by the lace and satin ribbons that adorned it so lavishly, but by the faint odor of camphor that clung to the garment. This was a nightgown that had been put away for years, saved for a special occasion, and brought out now, very slightly yellowed but still perfect, starched and unworn.

A bridal nightgown.

He might wrinkle his nose at the scent, but he had no quarrel with the landlady’s sense of occasion. This was the most important night of his life. His bridal night. Gideon swallowed thickly.

He undid the first button of the nightgown. The buttons were small, mother-of-pearl, and the buttonholes tight. His hands were clumsy and shaking, as if he had never unbuttoned a woman in his life. But this was Prudence.

He undid another button and something lodged in his chest as he saw the mark. A long, dark red blotch across her neck, marring the porcelain perfection of her skin.

He swore under his breath, leaned forward, and blew on it gently. “Poor little love. Is it very painful?”

She shook her head. “Don’t worry about it.” She reached for him again, but instead he caught her hands in his.

“A moment.” Something else had caught his eye. He lifted a curl and found another dark mark beneath her left ear.

Gideon stared at the marks, appalled. Suddenly he was disgusted with himself. He should not for one moment have even thought about taking Prudence to bed. He had been selfish, thoughtless. His little love had been humiliated, kidnapped, jolted across the country in a carriage and beaten by a madman.

She must be utterly exhausted and in pain, yet all her thoughts were for him. He was not worthy of such a woman.

But he would learn to be.

They would not make love tonight. Not the way he’d so stupidly anticipated. She would be too sore, too tired.
Tonight I want to lie in your arms
took on new meaning. Protection, security, comfort. That’s what she really wanted tonight, not a thoughtless, randy rake in her bed. She needed him to hold her gently and chastely while she slept. Enough men had made demands on his Prudence today. She needed Gideon’s tender care and protection, and he vowed she would get it.

He looked at the dark bruises on her skin and tried to swallow his rage. “There are more of these?”

“A few,” she admitted reluctantly. “Mostly on my left side. He was very angry. But truly, you need not worry, the herbal salve and the bath has made me forget my bruises.”

“I let you down, Imp. I should have killed him.”

“Hush! You did not let me down. You saved me. I was never so glad in all my life as when you walked in that door. As I knew you would.” She kissed him, her mouth soft and sweet. “And I am glad you did not kill him.” She stroked one finger down the line of his jaw in a loving gesture. “If you had, the shadow would have hung over us both forever. Forget him, forget what has happened. It’s in the past, and to rue the past is to dwell there in shadows.” She cupped his face in soft palms. Her eyes implored him. “Right here, right now, you and I are alive in this room together. Let us celebrate that.”

He took her hands in his, and lifted first one, then the other to his mouth and kissed them. “Wise as well as beautiful. How did I ever deserve to win you, Imp?”

She bit her lip, helplessly. Whenever he called her beautiful it robbed her mind of any semblance of sense. She knew it was not so, but when he said it, she felt beautiful.

He smoothed back her hair and traced her cheekbones with his thumbs. “You, my little love, are exhausted. I think you have been through quite enough this day. What you need now is not another man making demands on you, but a good, long sleep. Let us leave our celebration until tomorrow. You will feel better then. We have plenty of time, after all. Climb into bed and go to sleep. I will hold you, and keep you safe through the night.” He bent and kissed her mouth softly. “I’ll not leave you, Imp.”

Prudence thought about it. Outside, the wind was picking up. Raindrops spattered in gusts against the windows. She was tired and her bruises ached. She did want to sleep, but more than that, more than anything, she wanted to lie with Gideon, to be possessed by him and to possess him back. Her world had been shaken to its foundations today and she needed to make it right again, to put an end to her old life and begin a new life now, with Gideon. That would heal her more than any amount of sleep. He started to withdraw his hands and she clutched them firmly.

“I know I am tired and I will sleep later. But I want you, Gideon. I need to lie with you. I don’t mean just lie down on the bed. I need to
know
you.” She shook her head in frustration. “Oh, I don’t know the word for it! Why are girls kept so ignorant? It is positively gothic!”

She tried again to explain how she felt. “Everyone wants something of me but nobody ever asks me what I want. Well, I want you! Now, tonight! I want to give myself to you. I want you to possess me in the way a man possesses a woman. I want to take you into my body.”

Her cheeks suddenly flamed and she looked away, flustered by the strength of her desire. “I’m sorry, that sounds completely shameless, I know.” She looked back up at him. “But that’s how I feel.” The sudden burst of feminine self-confidence drained abruptly away. “If you would like to, that is,” she added in a small voice.

His dark eyes devoured her. He said in a low, ragged voice, “Imp, you have unmanned me with such a declaration.
If I would like to?
” He tried to smile and failed. “I’ve never wanted anything more in my life. I’ve wanted to make love to you ever since I first met you. The hardest struggle of my existence has been to keep my hands off you.”

“So you will lie with me tonight?”

“I will.” His voice was husky with emotion. He cradled her in his arms, barely holding her, and yet she felt wrapped within his embrace. His body touched lightly against the full length of hers, hard, masculine, and gentle. She shivered in his arms and pressed closer, reveling in his heat, in his strength. This was what she’d promised herself in her darkest hour, this was what she needed now: Gideon.

He lowered his mouth to hers. His lips were so gentle. She marveled dazedly at his effect on her. That the touch, the caress of his mouth on hers could set other parts of her body to such aching…craving…yearning. She made a small sound deep in her throat, and he pulled back instantly until he barely touched her. His mouth gentled, and he covered her cheek, her jawbone, her eyelids with soft butterfly kisses.

He was being careful of her. She didn’t want to be treated like an invalid. She wanted passion. Possession.

She reached up and wound her arms around his neck, pulling him closer, pressing herself against him, and immediately he deepened the kiss. She tasted him and gloried in the sensation. It was this she craved, the unique, intoxicating flavor of Gideon and desire.

His kiss was slow, intense, and drugging. It reached deep into her, body and soul.