The Phantom Diaries (12 page)

“My, that boy sure has it bad.”

“Bad?”

Roberta glanced at me with the wisdom of her years, but kept her lips sealed.

Aaron’s function that night turned out to be the stuffiest one yet. Women in elegant floor length gowns and men in tuxedos circled the room in hushed tones as they sipped from crystal champagne flutes and daintily nibbled an odd assortment of hors d’oeuvres. While Aaron had arranged an advance on my salary so that I could have a wardrobe to keep up with such events, I was hardly in keeping with the extravagance displayed tonight.

After making the rounds, Aaron brought me to a secluded corner for a well needed moment to breathe.

“I have to say, quite honestly, that I don’t get it,” I said. I stuffed an escargot topped canapé into my mouth and was surprised to find that I liked it. “These people have plenty of money to go out there and have fun, and this is the best they can do; walk around only for the purpose of being seen and only engaging in conversations that will impress everyone around them?”

“Well, you’re certainly a breath of fresh air in all this. I have to say that I’ve never found these functions as amusing as I have these past weeks with you.”

“You’re sweet.”

“Oh, I’m sweet now, am I?” He winked and raised his flute to clink against mine.

For someone so young, he certainly held his own in a crowd filled with so many accomplishments; so many successes. He seemed completely unfazed by the competitive nature of some of the men who set out to prove themselves bigger, better and richer.

He gazed across the room and gestured with his chin towards a large woman in blue chiffon. “See her?” he whispered. “She has three children, and six grandchildren. Except for the holidays, they never come up to see her. She thinks it’s because she refuses to share the millions she inherited when her husband died, but the truth is they never really liked her. She’s a tyrant.”

I took in her haughty gaze as she berated a waiter and had no trouble believing Aaron’s assessment of her.

“And that guy with the outdated mustache.” He nodded to a funny looking man by the entrance. “He was accused of embezzlement last year and everyone turned their backs on him as he faced losing everything. Then he was acquitted, though everyone knew he was guilty, and now, after rebuilding his empire and expanding it, they all hold him in high esteem.”

“That’s awful.”

“And behind you.”

I turned to see a blue-haired lady with a red satin dress that hung unflatteringly on her thin frame.

“People say her husband divorced her because she spent more time making out with her Bichon than she did with him.”

“Aaron,” I let out with disgust. “That’s gross.”

He put his arm around my shoulders and tugged me to his side. Together we watched the people moving around the room, talking quietly.

“I just want you to see how, underneath it all, they’re just people. I don’t ever want you to think that you’re beneath them. You deserve to have people look up to you and admire you. You’ve got more talent when you hit that high C than most people here have in their entire arsenal of feeble talents.”

Flustered, I nodded.

Thankful to see the evening come to an early close, I met with Eric to go over that complicated aria again. I sensed something was blocking me and I couldn’t understand what it was. The melody tripped my tongue and left me scrambling to get all the lyrics out.

Eric seemed annoyed. He was aware that I’d be rehearsing the song the following day and was intent on having me get it right before I attempted it before everyone.

“I think I’ve had enough for tonight,” I said after fifteen attempts.

“You almost have it. You’re just trying too hard. You’re thinking about it too much.”

“Well, of course I’m thinking about it. You have me doing the same thing over and over again and it’s never right.” While I tried to hide my anger towards him, I knew he sensed how agitated I was around him.

He, on the other hand, appeared cool and collected and completely unmoved by the events of that night in my bedroom. How infuriating it was to know that I still felt such a great attraction to him.

“This song is a joyous celebration,” he said.

“I know that,” I bitingly replied.

He ignored the grit in my voice and continued. “It is the culmination of heartache, pain, fear and worry that has been set free in order to allow the deepest love she’s ever known to take her heart.”

“I know.”

“Find the joy in your heart.”

Was he serious? For him, of all people, to tell me to find the joy in my heart when he very well knew that he held the key to that joy… He was mocking me. He had to be.

“Fine,” I said as I regained control of my emotions and determined to show him that there was indeed joy in my heart. “You’re right. I guess I hadn’t really thought of it that way.”

I waved for him to begin the intro, settled my heart into a happy place, and sang with the joy and celebration the song required. The intricate notes were happy and gay, the lyrics real and heartfelt and the finale had me expanding my arms out to invite the world to join in as my joy filled the air and echoed long after Eric had gingerly tapped out the last note.

Knowing I’d done well and proud of it, I smiled sweetly at him.

He nodded his appreciation of the song, but his gaze remained veiled with dismay. Had he not truly wanted me to feel the joy? Had he expected me to bathe in self-pity forever?

No, dear Eric, I thought. I will not sit and sulk while you try to make up your mind about what you feel towards me. I have a show to put on and I will put all my emotions into that, not into questioning you.

Chapter 14

December 16
^th
, 2009

Dear Diary,

Tonight is the night. I feel ready and look forward to sharing all I’ve been working on with the New York crowd. I know so much is riding on my performance and the responsibility of it all has left me with a few sleepless nights, but I know I’ll live up to the great expectations.

I’m off to hair, make up and wardrobe.

As nervous as I thought I would be, when that golden curtain cleared the way to reveal the full house, I was in a serene place I could barely understand. And when those first notes of that first song rang out, I was absolute calm and confidence. My first note reached to the most distant balcony and it was as clear and perfect as anyone could ask for.

The song came to an end as I was waltz off the stage by Adelle’s love interest. I had all of two minutes to change out of the heavy garment and into a summer frock that was whimsical and frilly. I had ten seconds to spare as I awaited my cue and took to the stage once again.

By intermission, I was riding on a cloud of glory. The show was going off with the perfection few opening nights of any show could boast of. When I sang the last note, I knew I had the hard to impress crowd impressed. I could see the emotion I was displaying reflect in the faces of the men and women in the first few rows.

The spontaneity with which everyone jumped to their feet was astonishing and I felt a sense of pride as I’d rarely felt before. My only regret was my mother who’d not be able to make it for the opening. I remained hopeful that she’d free herself some time soon.

Chace smiled at me, his happiness for me radiating throughout his beaming face. He stood, his eyes still on me as he began to applaud, but the crowd turned their attention to him and offered an ovation that soon had him blushing.

I bowed one last time, the curtain closed and I headed off towards my dressing room.

“Annette,” Chace called.

Though happy to see him, I longed to retreat to my private room in order to drink it all in. “Chace, what a night.” I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed his cheek.

“My parents made it after all and I wanted them to meet you.”

“Sure.” I glanced at the lovely woman and formally dressed man and smiled as Chace made the introductions.

After warm handshakes and a quick hug from his mother, Chace leaned in close to kiss my cheek and say, “I’ll go out and make sure they’re able to get a cab back to their hotel then I’ll come back in a bit to see you in your dressing room. I’ve missed you. These past weeks have been so hectic, I’ve only seen you when I peer at you from the depths of my pit and I look forward to spending some real time with you.”

“I know. It’s been crazy. I’m surprised I made it through it all.”

“I’ll see you in a bit.”

***

From the top balcony, Eric stood watching the opera house slowly empty of its satisfied spectators. Annette had been even more splendid than he’d hoped for and he’d not been able to tear his eyes off her the entire show.

The époque costumes suited her, flattered her and gave her the aristocratic air she deserved. Her expansive wardrobe also reminded Eric of the similarity between Kristine and Annette. He tried to deny it; tried to look past it. But it was there; in the shimmering locks of hair that dangled from her up do, the gentle blush on her high cheekbones and the daring gleam in her eye.

Every note that had rang out had been a painful reminder of the love he’d had for Kristine and a surprising degree of longing returned to bring back his heartache. But the longing he held was strongly aimed at Annette. The sudden need to be at her side, to share in her joy was undeniable. He needed to find himself in her midst.

With the crowd adequately dispersed, he headed down to the casts’ dressing rooms. The halls were clogged with fans and people eager to tell Annette of their appreciation of her performance. She was flushed by all the compliments and attention, but she carried herself well.

Polite and welcoming, she greeted everyone and even signed several autographs as dozen upon dozen of blood red roses were collected from her arms and set inside her dressing room.

A man stayed close to her side. It took a few moments for Eric to realize that this elegantly dressed man had his arm draped over Annette’s shoulder in a rather possessive manner. His smile was calculated and his handshakes to the many fans was practiced and read false.

But beyond all this, it was the man’s face that so disturbed Eric. Though he was dressed in modern clothes and his hair had a fashionable cut, his resemblance to Eric’s nemesis was difficult to overlook. The eyes, the lips; and when the man finally spoke, Eric knew he was not mistaken.

The tone, rich and self assured, was exactly the same as Rupert Aragon. There was no mistaken it. The impossibility was outrageous and he had to listen a few moments more to assure he was hearing right.

Here he was – New York City, 2009, the Metropolitan Opera House, yet he was facing Kristine and Rupert, just as surely as if it was 1881. The intensity of the jealousy he’d felt back then came back to fill him with rage. His fingers struggled to remain lax, despite the desperate desire to clench.

Annette glanced up and caught sight of him through the throngs. Her smile was reluctant, unsure and slow to come. But when it spread across her face, her eyes gleamed with pride and an eagerness to see him. She wiggled out of Aaron’s hold and pressed through the people to where he stood.

***

When I finally reached the spot where I’d seen Eric, he’d disappeared. I continued through the corridor a little further and could see no sign of him. He’d vanished as he seemed so apt to do. My success and victory was partially his and I wanted him to know it and to revel in all the accolades. Why would he run away during this moment of triumph?

“Annette,” Aaron called from behind me. I erased any concern I might have had about Eric’s disappearance from my face and turned to Aaron.

His eyes were veiled and perplexed, but he didn’t question my sudden departure from the crowd. “I have a few people here who would like to meet you.”

The crowd moved in unison as Aaron guided them all to the vast lobby. A large number of photos were taken; many of me alone, several with the cast and a few with Aaron.

When the rounds had been made and people started to sift away, I leaned into Aaron. “I’m going to head back to my dressing room to get out of this thing. I’ll meet you back here in a few minutes.”

“Wonderful,” he said with a sure smile. “I’ll be here.”

I found my dressing room overflowing with red roses. Taking a few moments to read the cards, I was pleased by the kind words of all who’d appreciated my performance. But the large majority of the flowers were from Aaron and I couldn’t help but smile at his romantic consideration. He always made the effort to show me just how much he thought of me and I couldn’t help but think that he was the sweetest man I’d ever met.