The P.J. Stone Gates Trilogy (#1-3) (68 page)

I slipped around the back of the building not bothering to pretend I was hiding any longer. With the current government issued security cameras on almost every corner in the United States, I knew my prey was already well aware of my presence. I could have just popped in dragon style to see him, but I guess somewhere along the line I had developed a slight taste for the dramatics when it came to dealing out my revenge. I wanted him to see me coming, and to know that there was nothing he could do to stop me. I hoped Riders could feel fear in the manner humans did, and I wanted to see that fear in the eyes of the Rider who inhabited Bryn’s father’s body just before I killed him. The image wouldn’t keep me warm at night, but it might stop the endless loop of Bryn’s death scene from playing in my mind.

I burst through the back door and came face to face with Bryn’s father. He stood there, waiting for me, horror and expectation shining from the Rider’s features within him. I smiled to myself … he knew why I was there … and that there was nothing he could do to stop me. I raked a hateful gaze over him. I used to think Bryn and his father’s face held the same features, but now I saw that I had been wrong. They had shared the same large build, and black hair, but that was where the similarities began and ended. For the millionth time I wondered who Bryn’s real parents were, and how he had ended up being raised by those we all thought were his real family. Not that I would probably ever find out. Unless one day I finally gained full control of my Queenly dragon powers … so yeah … I’d probably never know.

“Been waiting for me I see.” I smirked at Bryn’s father as I raised my hands up to hip level while letting my dragon fire magic rise into my palms.

His gaze briefly flicked down to the means of his eminent demise before he met my eyes. “I knew you were looking for me, and I knew you would find me.”

“So you know that I’ve come to kill you then? Good to know I don’t have to explain it to you first.” I raised my hands and was about to set him ablaze when Khol stepped in behind me to whisper in my ear.

“Think about this. Please.”

“I have thought about it, and I’m done thinking, Khol.” I grated as I let my fire erupt from my palms and engulf the man that raised Bryn for his own. He screamed as the white-hot flames appeared to hover over his skin, kissing it gently at first, before curling its unyielding fingers into his tender flesh. It blackened quickly, and the Rider inside screamed along with its host, trapped and dying inside the prison of burning skin.

I watched with grim fascination as Bryn’s murderer burned alive. The scene was almost macabre, and yet the smell of charred flesh and his agonizing screams, instead of acting like balm to my pain as I had expected, caused me to suddenly feel sick. A wave of nausea slammed into me, and sweat trickled down my spine, but I forced myself to remain facing the scene until Bryn’s father’s body dropped to the ground still on fire. He was dead, and so was the Rider inside of him. Satisfaction was fleeting as guilt settled in its place. Maybe I could have saved Bryn’s father.
Collateral damage
, I told myself.
He had to die
.

“There’s no one else in the building.” Khol stated neutrally when I finally turned away from the blackened ashes that used to hold not one, but two lives. “They must have hoped that once you killed him you would be satisfied. They clearly sent him to his death.”

“And he went like a good little soldier? Just like that? That must mean they finally realize what a threat we really are, and they gave us what we wanted hoping to appease me.”

“Or they just don’t want to be bothered anymore.” Khol wrapped me in his arms and shifted us out of the building just as a thick black smoke began to pour from the ceiling.

I blinked a patch of woods into focus as the familiar feeling of weightlessness passed. “What the hell just happened?”

“It was a trap.” Khol said as he ran his hands up and down my arms as if to reassure himself that I was still in one piece.

I chuckled darkly. “Not a very good one.”

Khol bent his head down, his breath hot on my neck. “A few more moments and we both would have been dead. That smoke was highly toxic, even to a Dragon such as myself. If I hadn’t gotten a faint whiff of the fumes before we inhaled them, then it would have done its job and paralyzed us leaving me unable to shift us away before they blew up the building. I smelled the accelerant mixed in with the poison. But I’m merely guessing.”

“Oh.”

Khol whirled me around in his arms and I was forced to meet his angry fire backlit eyes. “I just tell you we were moments away from death and all you can manage is an
Oh
?” His face softened as he studied me, the flames in his eyes fading to their normal iridescent dragon green. “I know you still hurt, my little Queen. But you can’t afford to be so reckless with your health—with your son’s health.”

Bringing up the safety of my unborn son never failed to hit me straight through the heart. I brought my hands up to protectively cover the bump in my belly. “Sometimes I don’t know who I am anymore.” I whispered, wishing I could take the words back even as I said them. I had worked hard these last few months since Bryn’s death to cultivate a hard outer shell. I didn’t want anyone … not even Khol to know how soft my insides still were.

Khol ran his large heated hands through my hair and let them fall onto my shoulders and then roam down my back. “I’m here for you.” His magic slid into me, igniting desires in my body that my shattered heart despised I still had. He brought his lips down slowly, giving me a chance to back away, before he captured mine and slid his tongue in to fully sample my mouth. His raw spicy flavor washed over my taste buds, and I moaned as he pulled me closer to him, the hard expanses of his body surrounding me with magic and heat. I sunk briefly into the pleasure he offered me, or really the escape, but as his hands began to more boldly roam my body, I remembered myself.

I wrenched out of Khol’s heated embrace and slapped him across the face with as much force as I could muster. He barely batted an eyelash. “What do you think you’re doing? Have you forgotten yourself?”

He took a step back from me, his gaze not shying away from my glare. “No …” His eyes held a fathomless sadness that I’d never seen in their depths before. “I didn’t forget myself, I was merely trying to help you remember who you are.”

My face muscles twitched with tension. “That part of me died along with Bryn.”

Khol crowded in close to me again as he took me by the shoulders and shook me slightly. “Not one part of you died with Bryn, except his claim as your
Anam Cara
. I need you to stop pretending that you lost all your emotions when he died. Come back to me … please.”

I closed my eyes and turned my head. “I was never yours … I chose him.”

Khol’s voice dropped an octave with his apparent frustration. “And now he’s dead. You’re a female dragon … full blooded. If I had followed the dragon ways, the minute he was dead I would have claimed you for my own, no matter your thoughts on the matter. You would not have felt the grief that has been drowning you—”

My eyes snapped open and I stared at Khol in horror. “You would even dare to suggest that I simply bond with you and forget all I had with Bryn? He was the love of my life!” My voice was beginning to climb octaves with my distress.

“The love of your old life. But he is dead, and you have been reborn as only the second ever dragon Queen … I would never ask you to forget him … just to move on. You can’t keep going on like this—this empty shell of your former self. I’ll say it again—come back to me.” Khol’s eyes pleaded with me. But I couldn’t accept what he was saying … I just couldn’t.

I closed my eyes again and shook my head slowly. “I’m sorry. I can’t.” My voice came out a barely audible squeak.

Khol leaned into me, his voice a low inhuman rumble. “I won’t wait forever.” And before I could open my eyes I sensed that he was gone.

I dropped to my knees and swallowed over and over in an attempt to combat the sudden dryness in my throat. What did he mean by he wouldn’t wait forever? Did he mean that he would claim me for his regardless if I wanted it or not? Or did he mean to leave me? Panic slowly started to shimmy up my spine and spread throughout my system. The real question was could I stand to live with either option? I needed Khol, even I could see that in my current state, but what if he would only stay with me as his
Anam Cara
? Did Khol really expect me to move on with him after everything that happened with Bryn? How could he even still want me? He knew I had chosen Bryn … how could he truly accept me as his
Anam Cara
knowing he was my second choice? But then again … love makes us all do stupid things sometimes … even us dragons.

Bryn loomed over me, naked and ready to finally give me what I needed ... him.

But he paused, despite the raw hunger I saw in his eyes as he looked down at me. “Peej—we shouldn’t—why won’t you just—”

“Let you go?” I snarled at him. “Never. I’ll never let you go. You promised always and I’m here to collect.”

Bryn’s pupils noticeably dilated further and he stared at me with wonder. “Always,” he murmured, and as the word left his mouth, I could almost see the acceptance wash over his features. He finally understood ... he finally realized that he belonged to me and when he promised always, there would never be any going back. We didn’t need to be bonded as dragons for that to be the truth between us. Being
Anam Cara
to him would merely be an added bonus. He brought his lips back down to mine in another onslaught of need, and in one quick motion he came to find his home ... inside me. I cried out as the pleasure of feeling him again rippled through my system. “I love you Peej ... always.” Bryn’s voice was a guttural sob as he began to build a blistering pace.

And that’s when I felt it ... my magic ... my new stronger magic flowing up to wrap around us like a protective cocoon. I just instinctively knew that this time, our
Anam Cara
bond would be complete ... the real deal. No words were needed between us like when Khol had claimed me; Bryn’s soul and mine were linked together on a much deeper level. I cried out at the pure joy of knowing he was finally and completely mine.

I sat up gasping for air, the heaviness in my chest caused by the crushing knowledge that my dream … a bittersweet memory of one of the last times Bryn and I had been together … would only live on inside my mind. I would never again see Bryn anywhere beyond memories I valued more than my need to breath. He was only a memory now, no matter what else I told myself.

I slipped from my sweat-drenched sheets into the cool night air, and padded across my small room to sit at the old desk that sat haphazardly in the corner. I reached up and switched a reading lamp on that was perched on the desk. The soft glow of the light illuminated a scattering of newspaper clippings and articles. Sitting among them were the sapphire earrings Bryn had given me for my birthday, which seemed like so many years ago. I couldn’t stand to wear them … I hated them because they reminded me of how I would never again receive a gift of any kind from Bryn. Their glittering blue surface were pale reminders of the deep emotion-filled depths of his eyes. Eyes that I would never again gaze into. I pushed them under some of the clippings on my desk, and then let my gaze scan over the articles, my mind taking in bits and pieces of phrases and titles. “Senator Bill Wexington to be sworn into office as President today … New laws passed to mandate … Our Leader speaks out against claims he’s going against the constitution by passing … Shooting at Movie Theater, 20 Dead, Stronger Gun Control Needed … Micro chipping people for their own safety? … ” It went on and on and my head began to swim.

A light knock on my door drew my attention as it slowly creaked open. Jeremy’s sleep tousled hair stood up at odd angles, which if I was in any other mood might have made me laugh. “Hey, I saw your light on from under the door. Can’t sleep either, I see.” He gave me a tentative smile as he moved further into the room.

I blinked wide eyes up at him. “My God, we’ve stepped right into an Orson Welles novel, haven’t we? Why didn’t I see it before?” I motioned at the mess of papers on my desk. “Have we already lost?” Much to my horror, my face crumpled up and I started to babble. “We have, haven’t we? I mean our families are all dead … Bryn is dead … Jenna has a Rider in her … the Riders are controlling the world and no one even seems to care.” A guttural sob wrenched from my chest. “Even if we manage to beat them … what happens if there’s ever another threat? I mean how are we supposed to perpetuate our lines now?” I hadn’t really allowed myself to think about the very real fact that even if we won this battle we were destined to lose the war. Our world would be left vulnerable after the span of Jenna and Jeremy’s lifetime. We could make do without Guardians because dragons would suffice, and I was still a Seer, even though I wasn’t human … but we wouldn’t have another Gatekeeper or Speaker after Jeremy and Jenna died, their lines would be completely wiped out. How would we manage then? And even if we all lived forever … how could just one team keep the entire world safe? I dropped my face into my hands, “It’s hopeless … completely hopeless.” I suddenly felt like a small child seeing the severities of the real world for the very first time.