The Price of Love (A Price Novel Book 1) (15 page)

We ate deli sandwiches on croissants, fresh fruit, and the best little pastries I had ever tasted. We enjoyed lying under the shade trees, watching everyone in the park. I really loved being with him, and that still made me nervous sometimes. He lay down and put his head in my lap. “When we get back home, are you really still going to want to go out with me?” he asked.

When he said stuff like that, it really confused me. Surely he knew no girl in her right mind would say no to that, but he acted like he didn’t realize that. “That’s the plan, isn’t it? I thought we already discussed this on the way to Italy.”

“That’s my plan. It’s yours I want to be solid on.”

“I guess it depends,” I said.

“On what?”

“If you’re really coming back.”

He sat up and looked at me. “Do you think I’m lying? Do you think I’m spending all this time with you to entertain myself?”

“I don’t know. Maybe I’m being silly.”

“Yeah, you are. Now answer my question. Will you go out with me in LA?”

“Slayde, I mean, I guess that depends on what happens between now and then.”

He got a strange look on his face and paused a minute before he said, “I have no idea why I haven’t asked you this before now. Do you have a boyfriend back home?” I started laughing, but he was being serious. “Why are you laughing? That’s a serious question.”

“No, I don’t have a boyfriend back home,” I assured him.

He smiled and lay back in my lap. “Then what’s the problem?”

“Who knows, you may have a girlfriend between now and then.”

He smiled. “I do — you.”

I didn’t know what to say, but I knew I was blushing. I took my eyes off his face and noticed some girls walking in the park — and one of them was Kinley. I felt sick. Slayde obviously saw them too, because he said, “You ready to head back? It looks like it may rain.” I did think it could rain, but the way her presence changed his attitude bothered me.

“What’s the deal with her?” I asked. I’d danced around this subject before and never gotten a real answer.

“Kinley? No deal — she’s just a real pain, and she drives me crazy.”

“You don’t like her?”

“Not really. I tolerate her for photo shoots and stuff, but that’s it.” He was looking down, getting everything together.

Something about her really bothered me, but I didn’t know what it could be other than the fact that she was beautiful and I thought she had a thing for Slayde. He didn’t pay any more attention to her, even after the women sat about twenty feet away from us. He smiled at me and grabbed the basket in one hand and my hand in the other.

“How about a nap?” he asked and smiled as we walked back.

It started to rain as soon as we got back to his building. “Perfect timing,” I said.

“That’s all life really is, isn’t it?”

I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. When we got upstairs, we opened the balcony doors so we could listen to the rain as we snuggled up in the bed for the rest of the afternoon. I couldn’t have thought of any better way to end the day than that.

*****

I hadn’t seen or spoken to Kenedy since our conflict. But a few days before I was going to leave, I was heading out to go into town for a few things when Kenedy met me in the hall. She had this crazy look on her face. I didn’t know what was going on, but I knew it wasn’t good.

“Arden, we need to talk. Let’s go back into Slayde’s apartment. I don’t want to talk about this out here.”

As soon as she shut the door behind us, I asked, “What’s wrong?” For a minute, I thought something was wrong with our mom or one of our other sisters.

“I don’t know how to tell you this, but you’re going to find out one way or the other. I would rather you heard it from me.”

“What are you talking about?” My stomach was in knots, and my armpits were starting to sweat. I knew whatever she was about to tell me was going to hurt.

“It’s Kinley — she’s pregnant,” she said.

“And what does this have to do with me?”

“Arden, the baby is Slayde’s.” I couldn’t tell if it was a look of concern or pleasure on her face, but I knew she was serious.

“What? Kenedy, that isn’t possible. You’re making this up,” I shouted. “You’re such a bitch. You’re really a hateful bitch.” I grabbed my purse and ran out of the apartment.

I knew Slayde had said he had a photo shoot, but I couldn’t wait. I had to talk to him right away. I knew where I thought he would be. He had shown me where they took some of their indoor photos.

I didn’t have to look that far before I found him — but he wasn’t at a photo shoot. He was with Kinley, sitting down, talking at a table in a courtyard. I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but she was crying, and he was consoling her. My stomach turned, and I was afraid I was literally about to be sick, right there in front of everyone.

I couldn’t believe this was happening. I had woken up that morning the happiest I had ever been in my whole life, and within hours, my whole world was destroyed. I felt more pain than I had ever felt in my life.

I couldn’t wait around for him to come back. There was nothing he could say that I wanted to hear. Going back to his place, I grabbed everything I could put my hands on and threw it in my bag and headed for the airport.

I had a few hours to kill before my flight. I tried to read a book to keep my mind occupied, but nothing helped. I was miserable and trying not cry. This was going to be a long flight. I decided I needed a drink.

I was sitting at the bar, minding my own business, when Robert, the Swedish guy Holly had dated, sat down next to me. “Well, hello there. Are you on your way home?” he asked.

I really wasn’t in the mood for this, but I had never been one to be rude. “Yes, I’m going home.” I tried to force a smile.

“Can I buy you a drink?”

“I’ve already ordered one, but thank you,” I said. I really didn’t want to have to carry on a conversation with anybody at that point, so I couldn’t let him buy me a drink.

“You look upset. Are you OK?” he asked.

“I’m just nervous about the long flight I have ahead of me,” I lied, but I sure wasn’t about to go into my problems with him.

“I have something that can help you with that.” He pulled a small tin out of his pocket and handed me two little blue pills.

“Oh no, I don’t take pills.”

“It will help you relax. I take them all of the time when I fly. It will make your flight smooth and easy.” He handed them to me and got up. “You have a safe flight, pretty lady.” He kissed my hand and walked away.

Once I got on the plane, it all really hit me. I was nauseated and full of anxiety. How could Slayde have done this to me? How could he sit there and lie to my face all summer long? How did I not realize what was really going on? It was right in front of me the whole time, but I didn’t want to see it.

I started crying uncontrollably. I had to get up and go to the bathroom to try and pull myself together. I wasn’t going to cry over this. I wasn’t going to cry over
him
. He didn’t deserve my tears.

Once I got back to my seat, I decided it wouldn’t hurt to take one of the pills Robert had given me.
What do I have to lose at this point?
I went ahead and took them both. Before long, I could feel the effects. I felt relaxed and like everything was going to be OK. I closed my eyes and went to sleep. They must have done the trick, because before I knew it, the plane was landing. I couldn’t believe I had slept that long. Maybe Robert was onto something.

I went to grab my phone to call Milly to come pick me up, but I couldn’t find it. I must have left it in Slayde’s apartment during my mad dash out of there. So, I had to get a cab back to school.

I was strangely happy to be home. As upset as I was, I felt some comfort from seeing my dorm room exactly the same as it had been the day I left for Paris. I sure wished I could say the same for me.

A
few weeks had passed since my return from Paris. The new semester had started, and I was keeping myself busy to keep from losing my mind. I hadn’t talked to Slayde or Kenedy since I had gotten back. I guessed it was a good thing I left my phone, because I was able to get a new one with a new number, so Slayde had no way to contact me. I noticed that Kenedy had sent me a few emails in the last few days, but I couldn’t bring myself to read them. I did send her and my mother my new cell number for safety reasons. I just hoped that, in time, I would find some relief for the gaping hole I felt in my chest.

I was sitting on the floor with my study notes when Eric poked his head in. “Study group in your room tonight?” he asked.

“That’s the plan,” I said, getting up off the floor. “Who else is coming?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t said anything to anyone else. So, I guess it’s just me and you.” He smiled at me. I knew he was just trying to get me alone.

“Well, the more brains the better. I’m sure Milly will join us, and I’ll see if Josh and Karen want to come. We can order pizza or something. It’s going to be a long night.” I could tell he was disappointed. We had been playing this same game for three years, and today was no different.

I shut the door behind him and collapsed on my bed. I saw there were six messages on the answering machine, but I didn’t really care. I didn’t want to talk to anyone. I just wanted to hide in my room alone for an hour in peace before I had to go to lab.

I couldn’t believe the summer that I’d had. In my gut, I had known from the beginning that I would get hurt if I let myself fall for Slayde, but I had never dreamed it would feel like this. Tears filled my eyes, and I tried stopping them, but I just couldn’t. I needed to cry, but I was so afraid that if I let myself start, I might never stop. I hadn’t spoken about Slayde to anyone, not even my best friend, Milly. She would be furious that I had kept this from her, but I just hadn’t dared open up about it. I lay there a few minutes and let myself cry while I had some privacy.

Milly and I had met our sophomore year in college when we lived on the same floor in the dorms and we both had terrible roommates. We ended up spending most of our nights passed out in each other’s rooms after studying. Our roommates eventually decided we should room together, and they moved Milly’s stuff into my room and my roommate’s stuff into hers. I guess they were sick of us. This had happened unbeknownst to us, but we were more than happy when we discovered their arrangement. We had lived together ever since, and she had been the most important person in my life for years.

Milly had beautiful, long, curly auburn hair and soft-blue eyes. She was originally from Texas and still had a bit of a Southern drawl, but it was cute. She was loud and blunt and living life completely without a filter, but she was the most secure person I had ever met. She knew who she was and what she wanted, and she didn’t let anybody get under her skin. In other words, she was everything I wished I were. Milly didn’t date much, but she seemed to think it was her life’s mission to find me a man.

I had obviously dozed off, because the next thing I knew, Milly was shaking me. “What are you doing? Are you OK? Arden Simms is skipping class … I am so proud of you.” She gave me a little clap and a silent “Yay!”

“What time is it?” I looked at my watch. I had been asleep for three hours; I had missed class.

“Arden, you look like shit. What is going on? You’ve been a zombie since you got back from France, and jet lag doesn’t last for weeks. Tell me what’s really going on with you. Is this about a guy?” She looked at me with raised eyebrows.
She’d love to know the truth. The juicy details would just make her day … all but the part where I was left completely heartbroken.

I just stared at her. “No, Mills, this isn’t about a guy. I know you would love to believe something like that, but it’s not.” I just couldn’t bring myself to even say his name. I felt my throat get tight. I was going to cry again.

Luckily, she had turned away to leaf through the mail, and she started oohing and aahing over some guy in the new Calvin Klein underwear ad. She was always making such a fuss over the guys in these magazine ads. I never paid her any attention anymore.

“Arden, I have your solution right here. I bet he could help you get that stick out of your ass.” She laughed wildly as she held up the magazine so I could see him, but I didn’t give her the satisfaction of looking at what hot fantasy guy she’d found for me this time.

Getting up, I looked in the mirror and barely recognized myself. I had huge circles under my eyes. I knew I had lost weight, and my clothes now hung off my body. Milly was right. I looked like shit. What would Slayde Price think if he saw me now?
I guess he’d think he’d made the right choice — Kinley.
And the tears were back. I had to pull myself together. I had to get him out of my head.

Would I ever feel OK again? Was this what heartbreak felt like? Because I think I would rather have all of my bones broken than feel like this for one more second. I didn’t remember feeling this way when Brady and I broke up. Maybe I had, and I just forgot.
No, I didn’t.
I could never have forgotten a feeling like this.

Noticing my sniffles, Milly put down the magazine and came over to me. “Sweetie, what’s wrong?” She wrapped her arms around me and let me cry. “What happened in Paris, honey? You have been a wreck since you got home. I can’t help you if you don’t tell me.”

I knew she was right, but I lied anyway. “It’s not Paris. It’s Mom and Kenedy and just a bunch of family crap. Do you know my mom didn’t call me or email me one time while I was gone? Who goes months without talking to her child?”

Milly looked confused. “Why is that bothering you now? She’s always been that way. Why are you crying over it today? Are you on your period?”

She’s right — shit!
I was such a bad liar. I guessed I’d have to give her something true. “I also found out that Kenedy slept with Brady while we were dating. Can you believe that? Who does that? Do you know what it feels like to know that almost no one on this earth gives a shit about you?” There was a lot of truth behind that statement. I couldn’t name one other than Milly. Well, and maybe Eric.