The Primal Blueprint (53 page)

You may have noticed in the tips throughout the book that I emphasize the long-term approach and the enjoyment of the
process
of healthy lifestyle change. In discussing weight loss, I take great pains to position this eventuality as a
by-product
of healthy eating, exercise, and lifestyle habits. We must reflect on the importance of this distinction because we are so conditioned to approaching lifestyle goals with a short-term, results-oriented approach.

Bookstore shelves are stocked with a dizzying array of self-help, financial success, and weight-loss titles; the sum total of the exhortations to do this and do that to be happy are truly overwhelming. Ditto for the level of negative cultural programming I have been exposed to working with my personal training clients. We have essentially been programmed to attach our happiness to our achievements, possessions, personal appearance, position of influence in career or community, and other superficial factors. I contend that setting and pursuing goals is screwing us up more than it’s helping. That’s right, I’m going to suggest you lay down what you might think is the most important weapon in your arsenal to “succeed” with lifestyle change—the determination and pursuit of specific and quantifiable goals.

We live in a superficial world where everything we do is measured and judged, and success (and often happiness) is thus defined by what we accomplish and accumulate, rather than what kind of character we have. For athletes, the world hits us with, “How far did you run?” “What was your time?” “What place did you take in the race?” “Did you beat your previous time or your opponent?” All these interrogations typically come before the only relevant question we ever need to ask ourselves or anyone else about a workout or race: “Did you have fun?”

We use computer technology to provide objective data about whether we are reaching our goals—or failing. We use elaborate training logs to record every possible bit of information about our workouts (such as time, distance, strength-training reps, calories burned—even “shoe mileage!” Me, I used to determine my useful shoe life by noticing when the sole started to peel off…). We strain, struggle, and suffer to obtain predetermined times, paces, and distances of our workouts, thinking that our bodies and spirits will actually appreciate a robotic approach to fitness.

Throw it all out the window. Take it from me, because I have been a long, long way down the road, and it leads nowhere. My fervent desire to achieve my athletic goals—run in the Olympic trials, average 100-mile weeks, beat my training partners—ruined my physical health and my running career. When I returned to competition as a triathlete, I had a more relaxed attitude. I enjoyed the challenge of a new sport and pushing the limits of human endurance, just for the heck of it. Gun-shy from my injury history, I adopted a more relaxed approach. I listened to the signals from my body and backed
off when energy levels declined or aches and pains crept up. I enjoyed longer, slower bike rides into the mountains, connecting with nature and enjoying a sense of adventure in exploring new routes. I built my fitness in a comfortable manner and felt refreshed, energized, and inspired about my training—a far cry from the out-and-out suffering I endured from recurring intense running sessions with a fit pack of training partners.

Lo and behold, with my casual approach I became the fourth fastest Hawaii Ironman triathlete in the world one year, avoided injuries, and had a great time. After retiring from professional racing and pursuing a “real” career, I continued competing just for kicks on the amateur level, well into my late 30s. I had no goals, structured training program or logbook. I was just having fun, inspiring my personal training clients, and mixing with the professional athletes that I coached at the time, but I was ranked among the top racers in the world in my age group. Often I would see the “game faces” worn by others on race morning—tense, anxious, snapping at their loved ones, looking like they weren’t having much fun. I’ll never forget American swimmer Rick Carey, visibly distraught as he stood on the podium listening to the national anthem after winning the gold medal in the 1984 Olympics—because he failed to break the world record en route to his gold (he later apologized).

It’s simply no fun to predicate your happiness on whether you reach your goals. Failing to reach your goals will lead to disappointment and dwindling motivation levels. Even reaching your goals can lead to a dead end and a flawed mentality. Many “winners”—in sports or other competitive arenas, such as business—develop a distorted sense of self-worth, leaving them vulnerable to up-and-coming opponents or negligent in behaving themselves in ordinary society because of our twisted hero-worshipping of winners and the wealthy.

There is a phenomenon in endurance sports known as the post-marathon blues (or post-ironman blues for triathletes)—so common that it’s been discussed in psychological journals. It seems on the occasion of the glorious achievement for which they’ve trained diligently for months or even years, many athletes get that “now what?” feeling that leads to a profound sense of letdown. Ideally, we would use our physical accomplishments as catalysts for continued growth (including perhaps moving on to less extreme fitness pursuits), exploration, and challenge, not an excuse to get depressed and pig out on jelly beans in the weeks after the big event.

We must take a close look at the goal-setting process to avoid these common pitfalls and bring a relaxed, fun-first approach to our diet, fitness, body composition, career, and other lifestyle pursuits. The primary reason for switching to a
Primal Blueprint
eating style should be enjoyment—eating foods that taste great, stabilize your energy levels, optimize the function of all the systems in your body, provide long-lasting satisfaction, and alleviate the psychological stress of regimentation and deprivation that
accompany many diets. Yes, you will look better, become stronger, have more energy, avoid illness, disease, and obesity, and enjoy other quantifiable results, but these motivators pale in comparison to the instant gratification you get at every single meal from eating the foods that your body was meant to eat. The primary reason for your exercise should be for enjoyment as well—with the typical goals of weight management or competitive aspirations coming as a by-product. That’s right, even a world champion athlete such as Tiger Woods competes primarily because it’s fun, not because he’s driven by money or glory. If the latter were true, he would have quit, or at least lost a little of his legendary focus, early in his career, when fame and fortune were assured.

If you have any psychological stress about your diet, reject it flat out and start eating foods and meals that make you happy, drawing upon the long list of foods and minimal logistical restrictions of the
Primal Blueprint
eating style. Do whatever you need to do to enjoy your life, including indulging once in a while with a clear conscience and a big smile. If you are not having fun with your current workout regimen, junk it and figure out other endeavors that will turn you on. Instead of struggling and suffering to keep pace (with your peppy group exercise instructor or your training partners), adopt the
Primal Blueprint
suggestions to make your sustained workouts comfortable and energizing so they become fun again. Throw in some fun fast stuff occasionally to get you excited about pushing your physical limits and enjoying tangible breakthroughs including weight loss, more energy, and peak performance. Play once in a while. Forget the notion of consistency in this context and align your exercise program comfortably with your energy level, mood, and life responsibilities. Push yourself when you are rested and motivated and rest when you are tired.

“
It’s certainly okay to aspire to specific results, but you must never lose sight of the concept that the rewards come from the chase, not from reaching the finish line
.”

When you discard unnecessary goals that are mentally and emotionally stressful, you can focus your attention on process-oriented goals. Goals such as having fun, aligning workout choices with energy levels, and tackling new endeavors should define your exercise mentality. That said, great champions like Tiger Woods have an esteemed ability to blend a process-oriented approach with a strong competitive drive to achieve measurable results. It’s certainly okay to aspire to specific results (e.g., losing 10 pounds or completing a 10k, marathon, or triathlon), but you must never lose sight of the concept that the rewards come from the chase, not from reaching the finish line. You can lose 10 pounds very quickly via any number of ill-advised methods (remember that skeletal guy at the Boston Marathon?). The true joy from changing your physique comes not from a surgeon’s knife, a brutal calorie-restriction diet coupled with an exhaustive workout routine, nor even accolades
from the cocktail party crowd. The most lasting rewards come from the positive, fun lifestyle changes you implemented to make it happen.

This is essentially what I did by accident as a triathlete. I was still the same driven, competitive athlete that had once run himself into the ground; I had simply reframed my perspective to approach competition with a more enlightened attitude. Believe me, it still hurt just as much to swim 2.4 miles, bike 112 miles, and run 26.2 miles through the steamy lava fields, but my purpose was grander than the uptight athletes who have their self-esteem attached to their finish time or place.

It is time for you to accept the grand purpose of the
Primal Blueprint
and reject other motivators that are confusing, petty, or contradictory to your health and well-being. To get more connected with the ideal represented by Grok, we have to pare down, not accumulate. The power and the magic are in the simplicity—a refreshing break from the complexity of modern life, the sordid influence of the ego on your endeavors and emotional state, and the dizzying admonitions on the bookstore shelves that can easily make you feel like a loser if you aren’t as tight as the beautiful person on the cover. Grok did not traffic in any of this nonsense. Granted, he was preoccupied with survival, and we surely don’t need to regress to that point to adjust our mentalities. What we
can
do is leverage the
Primal Blueprint
laws in our daily lives to become healthier, fitter, happier, and more connected with our basic nature as human beings. Make it your goal to honor your genes and your destiny to make the most of your life on earth, without attachment to any outcome.

What are you waiting for? Let’s get Primal!