The Proposal (20 page)

“No, I like it just the way it is.”

“Then I’ll shave. For you.”

Overwhelmed by her burning feelings for him and
still reeling from her sex dream, Emma leaned up and brought her lips to his.
Aidan immediately froze, and she felt like she was kissing a marble statue.
When her mouth opened to slide her tongue against his lips, he slowly started
to thaw. Her hand that had been caressing his cheek slipped into his hair. She
ran her fingers through the silky strands, tugging and pulling as she went just
like her teeth did to his bottom lip.

Aidan gave a low moan in the back of his throat as
he thrust his tongue into her mouth. God, she had missed the feel of his mouth
on hers—his tongue dancing tantalizingly along hers. Desire pooled below her
waist, and she knew she wanted him more than ever before.

He moved his hand from her shoulder to her breast,
kneading and cupping the sensitive flesh through her nightgown. She widened her
legs, allowing his hips to dip between them.

But when he started to lift the hem of her
nightgown, Emma’s eyes flew open as reality, rather than a dream, crashed over
her. “Wait, Aidan no!”

He pulled his head from her neck to stare at her
with eyes hazy and drunk with desire. “Please tell me this isn’t because you
don’t want to do this, but it’s because we’ve both just realized the doctor
said not to?”

She nodded. “I’m not even supposed to have an orgasm
because it can cause contractions.”

He smirked at her. “Then it was a good thing I woke
you from the sex dream, huh?”

Blushing, she gave a half-laugh. “I guess so.” As he
pulled himself off of her, she said, “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. We both got carried away.” He smiled as
he snuggled against her. “Besides, it may not be as physically gratifying just
to hold you all night, but there’s nothing I’d rather do.”

Emma groaned. “Why do you have to say things like
that?”

“What?”

She lowered her gaze. “You keep saying and doing all
these amazing things. It confuses me.”

“You want me to be an asshole or something?”

“No, of course not.”

“Oh I get it. You want me to be the old,
self-centered Aidan, so it’s easier for you not to feel what you do.”

“I didn’t say that.”

“But don’t you want me to change?”

“I fell in love with the old Aidan, remember?”

He growled in frustration. “But don’t you want me to
be a better man for you and for Noah?”

“Of course I do.”

“Then let me say and do what I want.”

“Fine.”

They lay in silence a few moments. “You’re really
never going to forgive me, are you?” Aidan asked.

“Wait, where did that come from?”

He rose up into a sitting position. “Everything I’ve
done for you in the past eight days, everything I’ve said, all the apologies,
trying to make it right…it hasn’t meant shit to you, has it?”

“That’s not true,” Emma argued.

“Obviously it is. If you were totally sold on us
getting back together, you wouldn’t let Pesh come over, even in a medical
capacity. You would have already said you wanted to be with me.”

“I said if it bothered you so much, I wouldn’t let
Pesh come over, and you were more than welcome to have stayed here—it’s your
house for goodness sake. You could have stayed and seen for yourself that nothing
romantic happened between Pesh and me. But you chose to leave.”

“So now you’re trying to act like I left so that
must mean I didn’t really care if Pesh tried to make a move?”

“No, that’s not it at all.”

“Once again, everything is all my fault, right?”

Emma rubbed her temples. “Can we please not argue
about this? I’m tired.”

“Yeah, well, so am I.” He flung the covers back and
stomped from the bed. Emma didn’t bother asking where he was going. The
pounding of his feet on the stairs told her everything she needed to know.

Using her fists, she ground the tears from her eyes.
Dammit, why didn’t she know what was the right thing to do? Why couldn’t it be
clear that she needed to be with Aidan, or she needed to tell him good-bye? Why
did she constantly feel like her emotions were yo-yoing back and forth?

At her weeping, Beau appeared and jumped into the
bed with her. “Oh Beau,” she sobbed, wrapping her arms around him. He lay stock
still, letting her get all of her emotions out. Finally, she fell into an
exhausted sleep.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

The atmosphere between Emma and Aidan was strained
for the last few days of her bed-rest. Although Aidan brought her everything
she needed, catered to her every whim, it wasn’t the same as before. He no
longer stayed and watched movies with her. And even with Beau beside her, the
bed was cold and empty without him at night.

Aidan was forcing her hand. He felt he had done
everything humanly possible to make her forgive him, and now he was done going
the extra mile. Whatever happened between them was now up to her. And she was
completely clueless on how to proceed.

When she went to see her OB, Dr. Middleton, she was
satisfied that everything looked great, and Emma could come off bed-rest and
return to work the following week. Although she should have been happier,
uncertainty still remained heavy. Did she leave that afternoon and go back to
her house? Did she stay and try to work things out with Aidan? Or did she
prepare to move to Ellijay to be with Grammy and Granddaddy like she had
originally planned?

After she and Aidan got into the car, a tense
silence hung around them. Finally after what felt like an eternity, Aidan
sighed. “Listen, Em, you’re probably not going to like what I’m about to say,
but I feel like I need to.”

“Okay,” she replied hesitantly.

“I know you’re officially off bed-rest, but I don’t
think you need to be doing anything really strenuous to start with. So if
you’re willing, I’d prefer if you kept staying at my house…at least a little
while longer.”

When she turned to stare at Aidan, she saw his jaw
clenching and unclenching. He was trying to keep his emotions in check. She
knew that meant he really wanted her to stay. That thought made her heart beat
a little faster. “Are you sure you wouldn’t mind?”

Aidan tore his glance away from the road to pin her
with his stare. “Of course I wouldn’t. Stay a couple more days or weeks.” Then
under his breath he murmured, “Stay forever.”

Her breath hitched at his allusion to commitment,
but she decided not to press it. “If you’re really sure, then I’d love to
stay.”

She gave him a bright smile, which caused a smirk to
curve on his lips. “Good. I’m glad to hear it. Now why don’t we celebrate by
letting me buy you dinner?”

“No, no, this one needs to be my treat. You’ve
already done enough.”

“Hmm, I don’t think I’ve ever let a woman pay for
dinner,” Aidan mused.

“Good. You can learn that there’s a first time for
everything.”

Aidan chuckled. “All right, Em. Since dinner is on
you, let me find the most expensive place possible!”

***

The following night Emma prepared for her non-date
to the opera with Pesh. After putting the final touches on her hair, she stood
back from the bathroom mirror and took in her image. With its empire waist and
wide spaghetti straps, the violet colored cocktail dress came just below her
knees. Her nose wrinkled a little at how her straining pregnancy cleavage
wanted to spill out of the top. It seemed like she had gone up a cup size in
the last few days. She would be sure when she wasn’t wearing her coat to wear
her drape.

She hadn’t been dressed up in so long, and she had
originally bought the dress to wear to Casey and Nate’s rehearsal dinner since
it promised to be a swanky affair. But she was glad to get more wear out of it
to the opera.

At the sound of the front door slamming, she
cringed. “Em?” Aidan’s voice called.

“I’m in the bathroom.” Like a true coward, she had
yet to mention her plans of going out with Pesh. She knew it would cause
unnecessary trouble. She had hoped to be able to sneak out before Aidan got
home. Leaving behind a note or text that she would be out would have been so
much easier than having to face him. But Aidan couldn’t seem to get it through
his head that there was nothing between her and Pesh, and at the same time, he
had yet to tell her the magic three words she had been longing to hear.

While in her mind she told herself that her opera
plans were innocent, her heart raged in fury at her. Deep down, she knew she
was hurting Aidan, and that regardless of what he had done to her, that made
her a horrible person. She should have told Pesh no the first time he broached
the subject of attending the opera, but instead, she gone against her better
judgment and agreed.

She was snapped out of her thoughts at the sound of
Aidan shuffling down the hall. “I picked up some Chinese on my way in. I
thought if you were feeling up to it, we might go to Percy’s swim meet tonight.
He really wants us to come. I swear, he’s called me like five times.”

Emma winced at the fact she would not only be
disappointing Percy but Aidan as well. He appeared in the bathroom door with a
half-eaten egg roll in his hand. He took one look at her, and his mouth gaped
open. “I think you’re going to be a little overdressed for the YMCA.”

Warmth flooded her cheeks. “Actually, I’m going to
the opera tonight.”

Aidan’s face fell. “With Pesh?”

She gnawed her bottom lip before responding. “He
asked me last week because he had an extra ticket. Another couple will be
there, so it’s not like we’ll be all alone. It’s a way of celebrating me being
off bed-rest.” At the hurt radiating in Aidan’s eyes, she quickly added, “It’s
just downtown at the Fox. I won’t be out late, and I promise to stay off my
feet as much as I can.”

His silence caused her chest to cave in. She knew
she had to get away from him. As she started to brush past him out the door,
she noticed a crumb of eggroll on his face. Raising up, she ran her thumb over
the corner of his lip, catching it.

He grabbed her arm, his blue eyes flashing with
desperation. “Em, don’t go. Please.”

She hoped he didn’t noticed how she had started
trembling. “Aidan, I’ve already told Pesh I would, and I’m dressed. Besides,
it’s not a date. I promise.”

He scowled at her. “Of course, it’s a date. You may
think it’s just as friends, but I’m sure he doesn’t. Or he at least wants you
to believe that lie while he’s moving in for the kill!”

Emma stared down at the bathroom tile. “Yes, it’s
true that Pesh would like us to be more, but I told him I didn’t know what I
wanted.”

“That’s not true. You want us. I know you do.” When
she refused to look at him, Aidan’s hand gripped her chin, forcing her to look
at him.  “Why do you keep fighting this? Fighting us?”

She tried pulling away, but he tightened his arms
around her. “I’m not fighting us. There isn’t really an
us
anymore, is
there? You made damn sure of that when you couldn’t tell me you loved me and
tried to screw another woman!”

He narrowed his eyes at her. “Oh hell yes there is!
There was before, and there still is.”

Emma shook her head as tears burned her eyes. “Will
you ever get it? You broke my heart, Aidan! You shattered me into jagged pieces
from which I’m not sure I can ever be whole again with you or any another man.”

His face contorted with agony. “And I said I was
sorry. I’ve begged and pleaded with you to forgive me. I’ve even tried to show
you in every way how very sorry I was. Because of the last ten days, what we
have is even stronger now, but dammit, you keep railing against it because
you’re afraid I’m going to fuck up again!”

Emma cheeks warmed from her anger. “And how do I
know you won’t? You said you wanted more with me last time and look where it
lead us. How do I know that you won’t put a ring on my finger and then freak
out and screw around on me?!” she demanded.

“Because I won’t. I swear to God and everything that
is holy that I
won’t
!”

“You can’t make a promise like that. You can’t be
sure what you’ll do tomorrow or five years down the road.”

“I
am
sure! I know in my heart that I’ve
never felt for anyone like I’ve felt for you. All I want is you.”

“Aidan—”

His response was to crush his lips to hers. That
familiar electricity popped and crackled around her. Physical need, along with
love, pulsed through her, and she thought she would die if she didn’t get
closer to him. She wanted to touch and taste every inch of him.

Aidan gave an agonized groan when her tongue brushed
against his lips. He widened his mouth, accepting her tongue and teasing it
with his. Almost instinctively, she wrapped her arms around his neck as his
went around her waist. They moved frantically against each other.