The Psy-Changeling Collection (309 page)

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Authors: Nalini Singh

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BOOK: The Psy-Changeling Collection
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“He was more careful after that. Bilar died on the third day.” He’d convulsed in front of her and Lin, and they could do nothing to help, their hands and feet tied behind their backs, their mouths taped shut. Sophia had dared the monster’s anger and reached out with her telepathy, refusing to let Bilar die alone. His screams had echoed inside her mind for hours.

Max’s hands tightened on hers. “Why didn’t your parents, the watchers in your PsyNet, sense his deviancy?”

“Don’t you see, Max?” Her voice shook. “He was the perfect Psy.” Silence didn’t differentiate between those who had been conditioned and those who simply
did not feel
.

“Is he dead?” A quiet question asked in a voice that made the other half of her, the scared broken child, go motionless, wondering . . .

“Yes.” When he didn’t say anything else, she continued. “Lin and I, we were the last two left. He was nine, I was eight.” She felt her heart begin to speed up, her spine to knot. “The monster didn’t want to break us too fast, so he was careful. But one day he did something to me, and I
didn’t respond like he wanted. I didn’t scream. So he threw me headfirst through the large glass window at the front of the cabin.” Pain, blood, the glitter of glass in the sun, she’d never forget any part of it.

“Enough, Sophie.” Max’s entire body was so hard, so unmoving, she’d have thought him stone but for the furious beat of his heart.

“I want you to know.
Please
.”

“You never have to beg me for anything.” A harsh order.

“Lin saved me,” she said, clasping his words to her soul. “While the monster was outside, checking to see if I’d survived, he somehow managed to get to the comm panel, input the emergency code.” And then Lin, the sweet, talented telepath who might’ve been her friend in another life, had died, his internal injuries too massive. “Everyone’s forgotten them. Carrie, Bilar, and Lin, but I remember. Someone should
remember
.”

This time, Max did move. Pulling away, he turned. She went into his arms, ready for the heat, the almost violent pleasure-pain. “People talk about how the Psy are starting to break,” he said in a fierce whisper, “but nobody ever speaks about the victims.”

He understood, she thought, he
understood
. “We’re as dirty a secret as the monsters. Those of us who survive are damaged goods, never quite the same. My parents wrote me off, turned me over to the state. I heard them in the hospital. . . . talking about whether it would be better to just put me down.”

CHAPTER 24

Your request to have Sophia Russo, minor, age 8, removed from your official family history has been granted. The state will pay the costs of her care and education until she reaches her majority. You are no longer considered bound to her or responsible for her in any way.


Final decision of the Council Subcommittee on
Genetic Inheritance, November 2060

Max’s embrace tightened
until it almost hurt. But she needed it, craved it. The lost, indelibly fractured half of her clung to him, realizing it was being accepted, no matter the extent of its flaws. “The anchor thing,” he said. “That’s what saved you. Because it’s a rare ability.”

She nodded. “When the monster threw me through the window, he didn’t just scar my face. He also broke my mind.” She’d been a terrified child who’d finally realized that no help would come, that she’d soon be buried in an unmarked grave beside Carrie and Bilar. “But my brain didn’t give up. It ‘rerouted’ itself directly into the fabric of the Net, the only thing big enough to hold together what remained of my psyche.”

“I am so damn proud of you,” he said, his voice low and husky.

She wanted to grab onto the commitment, the promise, implicit in his words. “I’m really broken, Max.” It was the
final secret, the final truth. “I can pretend to be normal, but I’m not. I never will be.”

“You survived—how you’ve done it doesn’t matter. The fact that you have? It’s better revenge on that bastard and the ones that allowed him to do what he did than anything else.”

Shuddering at the unflinching acceptance in his tone, she moved one hand lightly over his back. His muscles shifted beneath her touch, as if in response. Growing bolder, she pressed harder, felt his abdomen grow taut against her. It was instinct to spread out her hand, run her fingernails over the fabric in sensual exploration.

Swearing low under his breath, Max moved back a step, gripping her arms at the elbows. “Aren’t you going too fast?”

“No.” She could feel her nerves, ragged and frayed, close to overload, but still she wanted more, wanted to fill herself to the brim with him, until she had enough for a lifetime. “Don’t stop, Max. The touch keeps me here.” Not in the past.

Max groaned. “Drink. And behave.” He put the hot chocolate in her hands and picking up his coffee, headed to the couch.

Left with no choice, she followed a second later. Putting her drink beside his on the coffee table, she turned her body sideways on the couch, terrified she’d scared him with the voracious depth of her need . . . but not ready to accept his decree. He’d told her she’d never have to beg. He’d accepted her. He was hers. “I’m not misbehav—”

Max had his mouth on Sophia’s before he could think about the consequences, his hand tangled in her hair. God, he was so angry over what had been done to her, so fucking pissed at the parents who’d rejected her when they should’ve stood by her. And because he’d die before he hurt her, his anger had nowhere to go—except into a raging protectiveness. Running his tongue along the seam of her lips, he urged her to part for him. And when she did, he swept in without hesitation, taking, tasting, claiming.

Her hands fell to rest on his thigh, excruciatingly close to his cock. Releasing his grip on her, he picked up those delicate gloved hands and put them on his shoulders. She clenched her fingers on him, her nails biting just enough through the thin gloves and the material of his T-shirt to make him want to strip it all off and tell her to use those nails on his flesh.
Hell
. Breaking the kiss, he put his hands on her waist. “Straddle me.”

She was all huge eyes and kiss-bruised mouth, but she did as he asked, her curvy body coming down on his thighs even as she leaned in and took his mouth. He hadn’t expected that, hadn’t expected her to seize the reins. But he was more than willing to let her have her way.

Her kiss was inexperienced, hesitant, and so arousing, he had to lock his muscles to keep from pushing up that primly buttoned cardigan and cupping a sweet, plump breast in his palm even as he took her mouth in a much more sexual fashion. Instead, he let her sip at him, let her stroke and taste and lick. The last made his fingers clench on her hips. She did it again.

Sophia Russo was a quick study.

Feeling his lips curve in a smile that was more than a little feral, he sucked at her upper lip, bit down on the lower. She jerked, then pressed into him, her arms weaving around his neck. Taking that as a yes, he repeated the caress, moving his hands down her hips and over the taut length of her thighs at the same time. A shuddering moan before she finally tore away her mouth.

Her eyes were awash in black, a sea of purest midnight. He’d been ready for that. But he wasn’t ready for the fever in her cheeks, the thumping beat of the pulse in her neck, the way her body turned all loose and limber, as if she was drunk. Alarm spiked. “Sophie, talk to me.”

“Mmm?” Dropping her head to his shoulder, she rubbed her cheek against his T-shirt, a lazy kitten. “I think you blew my circuits.”

The dazed comment made him want to laugh in spite of the savagery of his emotions—but worry cut the impulse
midthought. Maybe this was as close as they’d ever come, him and his Sophie. “Are you in pain?”

Another lazy rub against him, her hand clenching and unclenching on his other shoulder. “I never realized men and women were so different . . . not really.” Her breath blew hot on the skin of his neck as she spoke, her body a warm, luscious weight against his aroused form. “It’s quite extraordinary.”

“Baby, you can’t avoid the question.” Brushing her hair very carefully off her face, he looked down to find her eyes closed. “Are you in pain?”

“Have you ever had your foot fall asleep after a period of inactivity?”

“Yes.”

“And the sharp stabs afterward when you try to use it?” A smile flirted with her lips. “That’s what it feels like.” Her eyes opened. “I’m waking up, Max. A little pain won’t make me take a step backward.”

Protectiveness and pride smashed up against each other. “No more tonight.”

“No, Max.” She moved slightly across his body, an erotic stroke and a stubborn will. “No, please.”

He let her kiss him again, let her convince him. But when her skin flushed fever hot, when her muscles began to quiver, he broke the contact, lifting her off his body and onto the couch. No matter how much he wanted to claim her in every way a man could claim a woman, he wouldn’t do it if it would destroy her. “No more, Sophie. You can’t process everything at once.”

“But—”

He placed a finger against her lips. “That foot that falls asleep? It doesn’t wake up all at once.”

She stared at him for long moments, but he got a nod at last. Leaving her to repair her shields as much as she could—and it was a fucking fist in his heart that their touching hurt her on any level—he got up, splashed ice water on his face, then returned with the case files. “Ready?”

“Yes.” Taking a sip of the hot chocolate he’d made her,
she met his gaze, those eerie eyes of endless black impenetrable, unreadable. “Max?”

“Yes?”

“Will you remember me?”

His heart broke into a thousand pieces. “Always.”

Early the next
morning found Sascha sitting across from Nikita in a conference room at DarkRiver’s business HQ. “I didn’t think you’d come.”

Nikita’s response was pragmatic. “DarkRiver is an important business partner.”

“This isn’t a business meeting,” Sascha said, refusing to let her mother ignore the truth. “I thought I made that clear in my request. I’m sorry if you were misled.”

Nikita remained an ice sculpture on the other side of the table. “Every contact with you is business. If you weren’t part of DarkRiver, there’d be no need for contact at all.”

It hurt, yeah, it hurt. But Sascha was stronger now. And she had the strength of the pack behind her. She could feel their wild protectiveness on the other side of the door that enclosed her in this room with Nikita. But most of all, she could feel the love of her panther. “I wanted to tell you—”

“You’re pregnant,” Nikita said without ceremony. “It’s difficult to miss.”

But so many people had, Sascha thought, trying not to read in Nikita’s keen eyes any kind of an emotional meaning. “I’m about five months along.”

“You must be able to feel the fetus move.”

Sascha curled her hand into a fist under the table, trying to keep her emotions in check. “Yes. The baby is rather feisty, especially at three a.m.”

A pause. “You were the same.”

And there, in that instant, Sascha knew she didn’t understand her mother as well as she thought she did, that Councilor Nikita Duncan had secrets even an empath couldn’t plumb.

Nikita spoke again before Sascha could. “I’ve heard rumors that the leopards isolate their pregnant mates during the final months of their pregnancies.”

Sascha rolled her eyes. “The tabloids made that up after one of the women in the pack was prescribed bed rest because of complications—you must know how they sensationalize everything.” Her panther, overprotective as he was, would never try to keep her apart from those she considered hers—both in the pack and outside of it. But that wasn’t what she’d asked her mother here to discuss. “Why did you send me the book by Alice Eldridge?”

“You’re a cardinal with the strength to control tens of thousands,” Nikita answered, picking up her organizer. “Having an individual of your strength in my corner would be an asset—the benefit would outweigh any cost associated with your flaw.”

Once, that would’ve cut Sascha to the quick. Now . . . now she wondered just how many lies Nikita had told her over her lifetime.

Sophia woke from
the most sleepless of nights, her body aching from the inside out, her skin too tight, her nerves shredded. Everything was “off.” Irritation burned inside her, and it had no target, no focus.

Showering helped calm her body a fraction, and so did an intense ten-minute meditation. Feeling slightly more in control, she dressed in a black pantsuit paired with a white shirt, dried then plaited her hair—baring a violence-touched face Max didn’t seem to find the least objectionable—and forced herself to eat a nutrition bar for breakfast. Her cop, she thought, would not approve.

Strange twisting sensations in her abdomen, the renewed prickling of her skin. Heat was just starting to spot her cheeks when the doorbell rang. Throwing the wrapper of the nutrition bar in the recycler, she walked over and opened the door.

It was his scent that hit her first. Exotic and familiar,
male in a way she couldn’t explain. But she knew she’d be able to distinguish it from a million others. “Max.”

His eyes narrowed as he entered, closing the door behind himself. “You’re flushed. What’s wrong?”

She rubbed gloved hands over her arms. “I don’t know. I feel . . . edgy. My skin, my body—”

The worry disappeared from his face, to be replaced by something darker and full of a quiet masculine amusement. “It’s called frustration, sweetheart.”

Frustration: synonymous with aggravation, irritation, dissatisfaction
.

Yes
, she thought.
That’s the word
.

“I’d have more sympathy for you except that I spent the night with a permanent hard-on.”

Her eyes dropped to his groin. He groaned even as his body reacted rather spectacularly.

Sophia wanted to touch. “Fix it,” she ordered. “You know how to end my frustration and yours, and I’m no longer as overwrought as I was last night.”

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