Authors: Christina George
“Merry Christmas, Mac.”
Mac turned to leave. Outside the snow was falling again. He would be alone tonight and he hated being alone. He’d planned this whole evening with Kate, something to lighten her mood, even if only slightly. Now someone else would be with her, maybe making her smile, making her feel better.
He hated that.
.
“What are you doing on Christmas?” Kate asked.
“Well, nothing.” Nick sipped his organic coffee, “I suppose going through Uncle’s apartment. I heard from the lawyer by the way, he has the will, we’ll go through it after Christmas.”
“Great, that’s great. Well, not really, I’d rather…”
Nick covered her hand with his, “I know.” The café they were seated at was bustling with crowds, mostly tourists. Christmas was always a popular time in New York.
Then it occurred to her, “I have an idea.”
Nick smiled, “What’s that?”
“Let’s spend Christmas like a tourist, which you are, sort of. We can do all of the things that visitors come here for. Rockefeller Center, Central Park, all of it. I haven’t done this stuff in years, it’ll be fun.”
“I’d love to, Kate.” And leaned over and kissed her. It was the first time they’d kissed since the other night. Kate wasn’t sure he was really interested or if the kiss had been a mistake. “But don’t you have family you’d rather spend it with?”
“Allan was the only family I had in the city, and some friends, my best friend Grace, but we can stop by there and you can meet her.”
On Christmas they spent the day wandering the city, walking under the bright sunshine. It was a perfect, cold day in New York and the streets were packed with tourists and locals. Sounds and sights of Christmas were everywhere. At some point during the day Mac sent her a Merry Christmas text, to which she responded right away. She missed him, though she loved spending time with Nick. Confused didn’t even begin to describe how she felt.
“So when do you head home?” she asked as they wandered through Central Park sipping their hot chocolate.
“End of next week, I have to get back to the stores. I’m still not sure what I’m going to do with Uncle Allan’s apartment. Rentals in this town are awful, I might just sell it.”
Kate nodded. Nick put his arm around her, “I know it’s hard.”
They walked together in silence.
“Kate, I hate to do this on Christmas but I need to drop by Uncle Allan’s apartment. Do you mind? I have some documents I need to grab and fax to the accountant so he can finish up some final paperwork before I send it to the attorney. He promised to look at this over the weekend.”
She nodded, “Sure.” She remembered they had planned to be there on Christmas with Allan. The thought made her sad.
Allan’s apartment was lonely and dark, she hated going there now. It reminded her of Allan’s lonely life. She wished she could have done more.
“I’ll be just a minute,” Nick said and vanished into his uncle’s office.
Kate sat at the large table, remembering other Christmases spent with Allan. She always asked him why he celebrated Christmas if he was Jewish. “I finally gave in to commercialism,” he would tell her, and she’d laugh.
Nick emerged from the room, looking a little flustered. He held something in his hand, a small, letter-sized box.
“Is everything okay, Nick?” she asked.
“Kate, I found this earlier. It’s got your name on it.”
He set the box down in front of her. Kate lifted the top of it. It was a stack of typed pages with an envelope on top, addressed to her. She opened it.
My dearest Katie,
If you’re reading this, then I’ve died and I want to say I miss you very much. You were a dear friend to me, I don’t know how I would have gotten through the lonely times without your love and caring.
I wanted to give you one last gift, a piece of me that no one else has. My final book. I wrote it, even though I said I wasn’t. I think it’s good, I think it will leave a solid legacy and, perhaps, give you that career boost you so deserve. I would ask one thing, don’t let my publisher get their hands on this book. They’ll ruin it. I know you’ll take good care of it. It is my gift to you, for all the times you cared for me, bought me food and made sure I was never lonely.
I love you, Katie. Be happy. Always, Allan
Kate started to cry and handed the note to Nick.
“I was going through another box,” he seemed to stumble over his sentence, not sure what he’d dug up.
Kate gently lifted the pages from the box and started reading, tears still falling from her eyes.
“Would you hand me that box of Kleenex?” she asked.
Kate couldn’t believe what she was reading. It was, indeed, brilliant. He’d done it. Allan had written a second book.
“Kate, let’s go. Let’s read this somewhere, somewhere else.” He was right, it was too sad for her to be reading Allan’s final words in his apartment.
“Ok, sure. Let’s go to my place, it’s just a few blocks from here.”
Nick covered the box with the lid, which had been marked with Kate’s name.
.
At her apartment, Kate poured them some wine and she kept reading, handing Nick pages as she finished.
“Nick, this is exquisite writing. I’ve never in my life read anything like this,” she said.
Nick frowned, “Why would he not tell anyone he did this?”
“It was so like your uncle, actually. He hated publishing, but loved to write. He couldn’t help himself; I should have known he’d never stop writing.”
Nick sipped his wine, “Kate, what are you going to do with this?”
“I don’t know, Allan’s not under contract with MD anymore….” Her words trailed off. “Allan, why?” she said, “Why did you do this?” Kate started crying again.
Nick took the sheet of paper from her hand and put it back in the box, “Come on, Kate, let’s get you something to eat. Enough of this for tonight.”
Kate looked up, “It’s snowing hard, let me just fix something here.”
“No, let me. You’ve done enough today.”
They ate a little while later. Unfortunately, Kate did not have much in the way of food but Nick managed to fashion together some cheesy scrambled eggs and turkey bacon. Eggs and red wine, it was an oddly perfect dinner. They sat down on her couch and ate in silence, finally Nick said:
“These eggs aren’t organic; you’re making me do bad things, Kate.” Nick winked at her.
She smiled, though her eyes never left the closed box on the coffee table in front of them. Nick watched her intently.
“Kate, I like you. A lot. But I’m going back to California soon.”
She nodded, “I know.”
“I want to explore this with you, maybe it’s a grief thing over my uncle, but I doubt it. I think we both know what this is.” Nick took the plate out of her hand, “Finished?” she nodded, her head felt light from the wine.
“I don’t know what I can promise you, Katie. My life and work is in LA and yours is here. Maybe I should just go now, but I don’t want to.”
Kate swallowed hard, she knew he was going to kiss her and when he did, she knew what was next, what he wanted. Did she want it, too? His lips found hers; there was an urgency that hadn’t been there before. Nick wrapped his arms around her, pulling her to him, “I want you, Kate.” He breathed into her ear.
She wanted him too, but at the same time she wanted to push him away.
Another man who would leave.
Her life was full of them. But his kisses felt perfect, the moment triggered by heat. Kate needed some distance; she pushed herself up off of the couch. “I-I need to, I’ll be right back.” Nick looked surprised, but didn’t say a word. Kate went to the bathroom and closed the door behind her. Sitting down on the edge of the tub, she contemplated what was going to happen if she didn’t send Nick home. Mac was becoming a bigger part of her life than she’d expected or intended. To be with Nick felt like cheating and yet, there was Mac, married and unyielding from his position. Kate sighed, she needed perspective, she needed something to balance herself out emotionally. She had fallen for Mac, a man with whom she had no future. Her feelings were so jumbled she wasn’t even certain. Nick was here, single and wanting her. They could have a future, something that would never be afforded her if she allowed herself to continue to become so entwined with Mac’s life. Kate emerged from the bathroom. Nick was standing up, reaching for his coat.
“Stay,” she said almost in a whisper.
Nick walked over to her and kissed her neck and then held her face as his lips consumed her mouth.
“Let me make love to you,” he breathed into her skin. Any doubts she had faded into the night. She couldn’t refuse him.
They made love. Nick’s passion was fueled and tender. He wanted her over and over, when Kate fell asleep, he was wrapped around her. As she drifted off, she wondered what Mac was doing right now, in Connecticut.
.
It was a cardinal rule that Mac never spent a single holiday with any of his lovers. It was a rule he’d never break. Until now.
It was New Year’s Eve. Mac pulled his jacket tightly around him.
He left early because all he could think about was Kate and that she was alone and he wanted to be there for her. Though admittedly, part of him worried that she wasn’t alone, that she was with Nick.
It was six o’clock. He made his way to Kate’s apartment.
His rule. He never broke it.
So why now?
He couldn’t answer that. All he knew is that he needed to see Kate and he needed to see her tonight.
.
The first workday after the holiday break was always tough but this day in particular was harder than most. MD had been closed on Monday, leaving Mac to his own devices. He did not call Kate or attempt to see her again after his botched New Year’s Eve surprise.
Mac sat back in his chair, remembering the scene as he came upon her apartment. There she was with Allan’s nephew in hot, passionate kiss. Then, she took his hand and took him upstairs. He was certain he knew what happened next.
He had no right and he knew it but that didn’t stop him from wanting to break down her door and drag him out of there. He didn’t though; instead he went home and watched the ball drop in Times Square.