The Purity of Blood: Volume I (41 page)

SARA

The
next week passed in much of a blur.
 
I spent my days in class and having lunch
with friends, and evenings held up in the library studying and spending every
available free moment with Daniel.
 
Our strange
little argument seemed to have cleared the air on some level.
 
I wasn’t sure what it was, but I felt more
relaxed around him than ever before.
 
It
was freeing that we could have an honest argument and know not only that our
relationship was strong enough to weather it, but also that he wouldn’t revert
into the monster right before my eyes.
 
I
know it was a relief to me.
 

I did come to
accept one thing as our days together progressed.
 
I think it finally sunk in that we were
indeed dating.
 
Of course the next
question was, was he my boyfriend?
  
Yes,
we spent our time together, but I wasn’t sure I was ready to assign him that
title quite yet.
 
It seemed to formal and
held too many implications I wasn’t ready to deal with.
 
In the end I was probably too much of a
coward to risk tempting fate in such a way.
 
I wanted him in my life.
 
I
needed
him in my life and I wasn’t about
to jeopardize that for anything.

Friday rolled
around all too quickly and after I finished my last class for the day, I went
back to my room to start packing for the weekend.
 
Tossing clothes in my duffle bag, I felt
guilty that I wasn’t looking forward to seeing my parents.
 
It wasn’t that I didn’t want to see them; it
was just the thought of not seeing Daniel for a few days was more than I wanted
to consider.
 
I wished he’d come with me,
and he would have had I asked him.
 
But I
knew our relationship was way too intense for my parents to handle with any
sense of grace.
 
No, this was a trip I
had to make alone.
 
My parent’s
overprotective natures where I was concerned could be very unpredictable.
 
Something told me, the intense way Daniel
tended to look at me would scare the hell out of my mother, and my father might
forbid me to see him ever again.

I promised
myself that I would at least mention Daniel to my parents when I was home.
 
I’d say he was a new friend, one that I was
getting to know better.
 
It seemed
prudent to start laying the ground work slowly, so that if they ever did meet
him one day, it wouldn’t seem so out of the blue.
  

I couldn’t help
but wonder what they might think of him as a potential son in law. – I couldn’t
help but wonder that myself.
 
After all,
where was our relationship ultimately headed?
 
My love for him felt more like a compulsion, an overwhelming need and it
scared me sometimes.
 
I’d also wondered,
what would it be like to be married to a creature that didn’t really age?
 
I’d be ancient on our fiftieth wedding
anniversary and he would look more or less the same.
 

Shoving some
socks into my duffle, I pushed these thoughts to the back of my mind not
wanting to deal with them any time soon.
 
I was jumping way ahead of things and I knew it.
 
But how could I not?
 
I couldn’t imagine a life without him
now.
 
Shaking it off, I zipped up my
bag.
 
I had enough on my plate just
dealing with my emotions on a daily basis, I couldn’t think about how I’d feel
fifty years from now.
      

As I picked up a
bag filled with dirty laundry, I heard a knock on the door.

“Come in.”

I didn’t have to
turn around, I knew Daniel’s knock.
 
Coming up behind me, he put his arms around my waist and pulled me
close.
 
I leaned back, taking a deep
breath as he pulled back my hair and kissed the side of my neck.
 
When I turned around in his embrace, I could
hear him sigh.

“What’s wrong?”

I followed his
gaze to my duffle bag on the floor.
 

“You’re leaving
tomorrow.”

“Only for the
night.
 
I think you’ll survive.”
 

I freed myself
from his arms to finish packing.
 
Taking
a seat at my desk, he watched me while we talked about how our days had
gone.
 

When I finished,
he took me to dinner at the restaurant at the top of the faculty tower where
we’d gone on our first date.
 
As he had
before, he watched with fascination as I ate my dinner while pretending to
nibble on my food when the waitress or anyone else happened by.
 
She was the same waitress we’d had last
time.
 
And just like last time, I could
tell she was wondering how an amazingly well-built guy like Daniel got that way
when he never seemed to eat anything.
 

While he watched
me eat and talked about what his job with the Professor entailed, it dawned on
me that pretending to be human must take a lot more effort than I’d first
thought.
 
As I watched him watching me, I
couldn’t help but wonder what other little human eccentricities he was faking
on a regular basis.

I’d learned that the good thing about going to dinner with
someone who doesn’t eat is that the burden of conversation is lifted from
you.
 
I listened to Daniel for well over
an hour as he told me stories of trips he’d taken to places we were studying in
class.
 
Unlike in his lectures, where he
had to edit much of it out for human consumption, I was fortunate enough to
hear the whole story.
 
In class he could
say he’d seen a painting in person and describe it in great detail, but
couldn’t reveal that he’d known the artist personally and had spent time with
him in his studio over seventy five years ago.
 
It was a shame that he had to live so much of his life in secret, his
perspective on history was fascinating.
 
As I lost myself in his voice, I remembered Tabitha once telling me how
Professor Walker had made history come alive for her, and I smiled when I
thought how she’d react if she only knew the real reason why.

After dinner, we strolled around
campus for a few hours, reluctant to part company knowing we wouldn’t see each other
again until Sunday evening.
 
When he
finally walked me back up to my room, I found a note Darcy had left while I was
gone saying she’d left for the weekend and wouldn’t be back until Sunday
night.
 
Daniel frowned as I read the note
aloud.
 
I could see in his expression he
was considering secretly spending the night in my room again.
 
My vampire bodyguard.
 

I still wasn’t
sure how I felt about that.
 
Comforted to
a certain extent, but conflicted as well.
 
I should be able to take care of myself.
 
If I wasn’t, than what was the point of it all?

I asked him what
he knew of this blood hunter but he quickly changed the subject.
 
From the look on his face and the
uncomfortable way in which he shifted his weight around I think he knew a lot
more about what was going on than he was telling me.
 
I only hoped it was because he didn’t want to
scare me.
 
I had to laugh
internally.
 
If only he knew the truth
about me.
 
I was sure I’d seen far worse
than this hunter even in my short human life.

I left my duffle
bags by the door and pulled out a few text books.
 
I needed to do a quick review since I knew I
would never get around to it over the weekend.
 
Daniel helped by quizzing me for a few hours.
 
I was finding it was very helpful to be
dating someone who held advanced degrees in a variety of subjects.
 
He’d be the perfect tutor if he wasn’t so
distracting.
 
The way he raised his
eyebrow when he waited for my answers was hot and made me feel a lot less pure
than my blood was.
 
He was a bit of a
task master though and didn’t let me get away with anything, making me review
anything he didn’t think I fully understood until he was satisfied that I
did.
 
If my parents
did
know about our relationship, they certainly would have no
reason to object based solely on my grades.
 
So far I was making straight A’s.
 

After a couple
of hours, I was sitting on the floor with my back against my bed while Daniel
stretched out on top of it, quizzing me chapter by chapter with my text book
open in front of him.
 
I tried to hide a
yawn in-between questions, but it was getting late.
 
Finally I stood up, stretched and sat down on
the bed, leaning up against him.

“No fair
cheating” he smiled as I looked over to see where he was in the book.
 

Feeling the pull
of sleep, I took a deep breath inhaling as much oxygen as possible.
 
My eye lids were starting to get heavy and
with every ounce of strength I could muster, I was fighting sleep.
 
I wanted to savor these last few hours before
I had to drive away from him.
 

He opened his
arm, inviting me to snuggle up beside him.
 
As I did, he continued to read my text book aloud to me, adding his own
commentary from time to time on how ineptly the book had been written and
explaining things in a way that made more sense.
 
My eyes were the first to betray me and
finally closed, but I was still listening to him.
 

“Are you still
awake?” I heard him whisper as his hand gently brushed the hair around my face.

I mumbled that I
was and heard his voice continue until I finally, and unwillingly drifted off
to sleep.

DANIEL

With
her head resting on my chest, I watched as she drifted off to
sleep and wondered what difference there could possibly be between heaven and
hell.
  
Here, with her in my arms, I was
in an agony of hell.
 
Oh, her scent – it
was the most alluring thing I’d ever experienced.
 

Just a drop
, it would whisper in my
weakest moments.
 
Just a little taste and you’ll be satisfied
, it lied with insincere
conviction.

With her in my
arms, so helpless, I had to concentrate every second to beat those desires back
into their cage.
 
From the farthest
recesses of my soul, I had to ignore their screams as they struggled to break
free of the chains I did my best to shackle them with.
 

And here she
was, peacefully asleep, exposed, trusting.
 
Without even trying, I could see the blood as it pulsated through the
veins in the graceful line of her neck.
 
That neck, that center of the constant tug of war battling inside
me.
 
I felt cursed.
 
What God or universe would condemn someone to
be hopelessly in love with someone they wanted to kill with almost an equal
passion?
 
To force them to dream of
caressing that soft skin, and also to dream of the pure blood just beneath its
surface.

She thought she
understood the danger I posed, but really she had no idea.
 
She’d been taken in by the facade I
purposefully projected for the world and ignored her better instincts.
 
I should leave her.
 
If I really loved her, wouldn’t I?

I could hear her
heart steadily beating inside my arms, see the blood as it coursed through the
veins of her pale skin and the beautiful waves of her curly red hair as they
fell across my chest.
 
Unable to resist,
I leaned down and gently kissed the top of her head.
 
She didn’t wake, but instead snuggled a
little closer to me.
 
This wasn’t the
first time I’d watched her sleep, but somehow this was different.
 
I guess it was because she was willingly in
my arms, trusting me with the most precious life on earth.

I don’t think
I’d ever forget how I’d felt the first time I’d seen her.
 
How her brown eyes glared back at mine.
 
There was fear there, yes, but not as much as
I’d have expected.
 
There was more of an assuredness
behind them, a fierceness that took me completely by surprise.
 

She’d turned out
to be nothing like what I’d expected.
 
At
first I’d resented her, resented that Randall would order me to keep watch over
one he knew could so easily be my undoing.
 
In over a hundred years, I’d never been so tempted to kill a human as I’d
been that first day I’d encountered her.
 
Randall must have known I would be tested beyond anything I’d ever
experienced, and yet he left me alone, abandoned me in my greatest hour of
need.
 
I still couldn’t wrap my mind
around that.
 

And where had he
gone?
 

What exactly was
it he was expecting to happen with the two of us?
 
Certainly not this I thought as I gently ran
my fingers through her silky red hair.
 

No, never this.
 

I sighed.
 

I knew there’d
be hell to pay when he finally returned.
 

That day she
shoved me in the bushes, the day I’d almost allowed her to be killed only a few
feet from me,
that
was the day
everything had changed.
 
Inside I felt
shackled by an overwhelming guilt about it.
 
It should never have happened and I blamed myself entirely.
 
If I wasn’t a vampire, none of this would
have happened.
 
She’d never have been put
in jeopardy by that crane and never would have found herself here, asleep in
the arms of a monster.

As it was
impossible for me to forget even the most minute details of any day I’d ever
experienced as a vampire, I remembered it all too clearly.
  
It was those idiotic girls playing
Frisbee.
 
I’d like to blame them, but I
know it wasn’t really their fault.
 
The
one had tripped.
 
She’d fallen on a rock
and cutting her knee wide open, she was bleeding badly.
 
So much fresh spilt blood.
 
Not that it had smelled half as appealing as
Sara behind me, but even from that distance I could see it so clearly.
 
The scent came to me instantly, forcibly
dragging all focus from Sara in order to control the urge to kill the weakened
prey I’d caught in my sights.
 
Her fresh
blood was screaming my name with such a deafening sound, it was no wonder I
hadn’t seen the beam coming straight for us.
 
In that one instant of distraction, my Sara could have been killed.
 

But she wasn’t,
thank God.
 
And indeed, I had thanked God
every day since.
 
In return for his
noblesse oblige, I felt as if he’d given me a sacred trust to watch over her, a
responsibility so much deeper than the one Randall had forced upon me.

I’d seen it out
of the corner of my eye.
 
She moved with
a speed and agility I’d never seen in a human, yet lying here in my arms, I
knew she was undeniably human.
 
When
she’d pushed me, tackled me really, it had been with such unexpected
force.
 
I hadn’t time to recover my
footing before I went over, carried by her slight weight into the bushes.
 
Had I, we might both have died.
 
Her for real, and I for pretend.
 

I remembered
lying there deep inside those bushes in shock, feeling the heat of her body on
top of mine as it radiated through her clothes.
 
I should have killed her in that unguarded moment, but I hadn’t and I
wasn’t entirely sure why.
 
I’d laid there
completely motionless under her soft body knowing that if I moved even one
muscle, the first thing I would do would be to roll over on top of her and sink
my teeth deep into her pale white flesh and taste her.
 
No, not taste her, devour her whole.
 
Even now, I had to close my eyes at just the
remembrance of how much I’d wanted her in that moment.

She should have
been injured.
 
I was positive she had
been.
 
But somehow when she got up out of
the bushes she was miraculously unharmed.
 
I still didn’t understand.
 
I’d
heard the bone snap, I know I had.
 
I was
positive of it.
 
The cracking of bone is
a distinctive sound.
 
I know I’d heard
it, heard her softly cry out in pain the moment it snapped, only to have her
walk away moments later, visibly shaken and confused, yet seemingly unharmed on
his
arm.
 

As I’d helped her
out of the bushes … that was the moment it had all changed for me.
 
Over the following hours and days I’d felt my
resentment change to curiosity.
 
My
curiosity slowly gave way to interest, and eventually to … Somehow it had all
ended with this, her fast asleep in my arms.
 

I’d warned her
it wouldn’t end well.
 
I’d tried to tell
her, but it had done no good.
  
In all
honesty, I hadn’t tried as hard as I should have to dissuade her of her growing
feelings.
 
It was wrong of me, very wrong
and I felt as if I’d done her a great disservice in my inaction.
 
But I’d been fighting my own burgeoning
feelings at the time.
 
I suppose I’d been
more concerned with fighting what was happening inside of myself.
 
I’d tried not to love her, but having never
been in love before; I wasn’t sure what was happening before it was too
late.
 
And it was most definitely too
late now.

What had she
done to me?
 
I felt as if I was under her
spell now, caught in her web.
 
Had she
intentionally ensnared me?
 
Probably not.
 
She was an innocent, or so I thought, as
innocent in the ways of human relationships as I was.
  
And yet, I felt a crushing responsibility
for the frail life curled up, softly breathing on my chest.

I knew when
Randall returned, everything would change.
  
Would she still want me?
 
I
sighed.
 
Perhaps it was best for both of
us if she didn’t.

I was in agony
that she was leaving me in the morning, that I would not know exactly where she
was every minute for over a day.
 
Merely
the prospect of it felt like excruciating torture, but maybe this would be a
good thing.
 
I had become too emotionally
attached to her.
 
Perhaps a little
distance would give us both the perspective we needed.
 
I loved her, of this there was no doubt, but
what did it all amount to if I continuously allowed her to endanger herself by
merely being around me?
 
Maybe if I gave
her some time, she’d fall out of love with me.
 
I shuddered as I felt a stab of pain in my heart.
 
It was more likely, given the weekend, she’d
realize she never really loved me at all.
 
After all, how could she?
 
I was
unlovable, a monster.

She’d been
asleep for over an hour now, stirring occasionally to reposition herself closer
to me.
 
Reaching around, I pulled a
blanket out from under me and gently draped it over her.
 
When she stirred she would sometimes, ever so
slowly, run her hand over my chest.
 
The
sensation of it was more than amazing.
 
I
couldn’t verbalize it even if I tried.
 
This was the effect Sara had on me.
 
She made me feel things inside my body I simply couldn’t understand, but
I wanted to understand.
 
I desperately
wanted something; I just wasn’t sure what that something was.
 
If she was doing anything, it was waking some
long forgotten part of my psyche.
 
What
she was doing was forcing me to remember I was not only a vampire, but a man.

I imagined how
her soft fingertips would feel against my bare skin instead of through the
barrier of fabric that dulled the intensity of their sensation.
 

This
was heaven,
watching the moonlight play in the waves of her hair, listening to her soft
rhythmic breathing.
 
This angel I didn’t
deserve, asleep in my arms.

Morning came all too soon.
 
When the first hint of dawn found its way
through the blinds, I knew it wouldn’t be long before I’d have to wake
her.
 
The sooner she left, the sooner she
would return, but it was poor consolation.
  
As concerned as I was for her safety, I knew the safest place for her
was away from the blood hunter that was stalking NPU … and away from me.

The time finally
came.
 
I reluctantly leaned down and,
pulling her hair back, whispered her name in her ear.
 
She gently stirred; breathing deeply and
smiled as if having a dream she was hesitant to wake from.
 
When she didn’t rouse further, I said her name
again, this time a little louder and softly nudged her arm.
 
Her eyes fluttered and then finally opened
under her thick red lashes.
 

“Daniel?” she
moaned softly.
 

I was completely
taken off guard.
 
If I was capable of
dreaming I was sure that was a sound I would have heard echoing in my dreams a
thousand times before.
 

Her eyes now
open, she lifted her head and looked up at me through sleepy eyes.
 

“You’re still
here,” she mumbled, trying to wake up.

“You fell asleep
on me.”

“Sorry about
that.
 
You should have woken me.
 
What time is it?”

“You have just
enough time to finish getting ready and get on the road,” I answered, trying to
sound more cheerful than I felt.

She leaned up,
sitting on the edge of the bed and stretched out her arms, rolling her shoulders.
 
I studied the shape of her back as she arched
it.
 
It was so gracefully delicate.
 
Reaching out, I traced its shape with my
fingertips causing her to turn around and smile at me sleepily.
  

If only I were human,
was all I could
think.
 
She could be mine.

She finished
packing, ate a bowl of cereal, then disappeared for a few minutes to change and
brush her teeth.
 
When she returned, she
was ready to go and grabbed her purse while I picked up her duffle bags.
 
Neither of us spoke as we headed down to her
car.
 
I had nothing to say except that I
wished she wasn’t going, but I didn’t want to make her feel guilty about seeing
her parents.
 
She should want to see
them, it was only natural.
 
Our
relationship was the one that was unnatural.