The Puzzle Lady vs. the Sudoku Lady (16 page)

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Authors: Parnell Hall

BOOK: The Puzzle Lady vs. the Sudoku Lady
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Irving Swartzman was at his sartorial best in yellow shirt, green tie, and pinstripe suit. He was all Rick Reed had been able to corral, what with Becky and her client not talking, and the flashy agent was doing his damndest to seize the moment.
“An author, a
famous
author, comes here from Japan to meet her public. And what happens? She is
arrested
, not
once
but
twice
, on the charge of
murder
. On the flimsiest evidence whatsoever. And the only reason she has not demonstrated her innocence and gone free—as she clearly is—is because of an antiquated legal system that punishes the innocent for any given remark and forces their lawyers to advise them to remain silent.
“Minami, the Sudoku Lady, has absolutely nothing to hide. Yet she is a foreigner. English is her second language. If she were to misstate, misconstrue, or misunderstand some English idiom,
some unscrupulous prosecutor could seize on such a statement and manipulate a credulous jury into believing that such an innocent error was an open indication of guilt.
“No, it is no wonder she is not talking. It
is
a wonder that the police are holding her. Anyone with half a brain could see what is happening here. The Sudoku Lady has a knack for solving crime. The killer, realizing she was his biggest threat, decided to frame her to get her off his back. Any idiot could see that. The Sudoku Lady did not come here to kill people.”
Irving Swartzman popped open his briefcase. “She came here to promote her book:
Solving Sudoku with the Sudoku Lady.
Available in the United States in a new English translation. That is the reason she's here, and that's the only reason she's here. And if you need any corroboration of that fact, go to Amazon.com. And check it out.”
Cora gaped at the television. “Son of a bitch!”
“Yeah,” Aaron said, “pretty sleazy.”
“Sleazy, hell! The woman didn't come to America to meet me. She came to promote a book! I'm her inroad to the American mainstream media. The Sudoku Lady meets the Puzzle Lady, swaps a few war stories, and whips out the English translation of her brand-spanking-new sudoku book. That didn't happen because we had a murder, and Minami decided she could get more mileage out of solving it, only she got arrested and can't say anything. Her agent finally got fed up with waiting. Which is actually a good move because her being in-jail-for-murder with a book out is better than her being a snoopy-old-woman-giving-the-police-a-hard-time with a book out.”
“And you know from whence you speak,” Sherry observed.
Cora wished activities upon her niece that are inappropriate for a newlywed.
Sherry didn't respond. She was busy typing on her laptop.
“What are you doing?”
“Got a wireless modem. I'm on the Internet.”
“In here?” Cora said. As usual, they were dining in the living room in front of the TV.
“Sherry can get on the Internet anywhere,” Aaron said.
“There,” Sherry said, “Amazon.com. And there it is.
Solving Sudoku with the Sudoku Lady
. Available for preorder. The pub date's the first of the month. At the moment it's sales rank is forty-seven thousand, five hundred twenty-two. Your Puzzle Lady book is two thousand seventy-one.”
“Two
thousand
?” Cora said.
“That's out of everything. Fiction, nonfiction, children's books, advice on how-to. In
Puzzle Books
you're fourteen.”
“Fourteen?”
“That's in
all
puzzle books. Including crosswords and KenKen. In sudoku, you're number three, just behind two titles from Will Shortz. Minami's new book is fifty-eight.”
“In sudoku? Are there that many books?”
“There are hundreds. Fifty-eight's pretty good for a book that isn't out yet.”
“And she's forty-seven thousand over all?”
“Something like that. Let me check.” Sherry punched in the title.
“Actually, she's up to thirty-three thousand.”
“Oh?”
“Which doesn't mean anything. When the numbers are that high, just a few books makes a huge difference. You, on the other hand, are hanging in around two thousand.”
Buddy went nuts. He sprang off the couch and raced from the room, yipping wildly.
“Someone must be here,” Aaron said.
“Or he didn't like my Amazon.com rating,” Cora said.
Sherry went to the front door and ushered in Michiko.
The teenager wasted no time with amenities. “I have to talk to you.”
“What's the problem?” Aaron said.
Her eyes flashed. “Not you. You work for the newspaper. I cannot talk to you.”
“He's married to
her
,” Cora said. “He doesn't work for the paper if she says he doesn't.”
Michiko frowned. “What?”
“When you're older, you'll understand. Maybe ‘understand' is the wrong word. But you'll know it's true. If she tells him not to write it, he won't write it.”
“Wait a minute,” Aaron said. “I'm getting third-hand off the record? She's telling you to tell her to tell me not to write it. Come on, have a heart.”
“Don't be silly, Aaron. No one's telling you what to write. If you'd like to preserve your journalistic integrity, you're free to go.”
“I
live
here.”
“See?” Cora said. “There
is
a boundary dispute. I keep thinking of this as my house. Really, us all living here isn't going to work.”
“For goodness' sake,” Sherry said, “will you two stop bickering. Look, she's all upset.”
Michiko clearly was distraught.
“Oh, hell, so she is. Look, Aaron, the girl can't deal with this. Are we off the record, or shall I take her somewhere else?”
“We're off the record, we're off the record! Look, Michiko, you have my word. Whatever you say, I won't write it. It will
not
be in my story. Go ahead, say whatever you want. You're not going to get into trouble.”
“It's that horrible man.”
“What horrible man?”
“The one she married. No, not you. The other one.”
“Dennis?” Aaron said. “What's he done?”
“He threatened me.”
Cora sprang from the couch, her eyes blazing. “He
threatened
you?”
Michiko put up her hands. “No. Not to hurt me. With the police.”
“He said he would go to the police?”
“Yes.”
“And tell them what?”
“Oh.”
“You don't want to tell us?”
“No.”
“I know. But you're going to. It'll be much easier if you just do it and get it over with. So, take your time. Take a deep breath. Relax. And tell us the thing you don't want to tell us.”
Michiko scrunched up her face. Then she sighed. “He said he would tell them she got a blackmail note.”
“How does he know that?”
“He doesn't. He is guessing.”
“Is he guessing right?”
Michiko said nothing.
“It wouldn't bother you if he wasn't. So your aunt got a blackmail note. Interesting. What did it say?”
“I have it here.”
Michiko reached into her purse. Took out a folded piece of paper. Passed it over.
Cora unfolded it. Her mouth fell open.
It was a crossword puzzle.
ACROSS
1 Attire
5 Prickly seed covers
9 Afrikaner
13 Spring zodiac sign
15 ___ arms (angry)
16 BBs and bullets
17 Horizontal row in sudoku
18 Message part 1
20 Where Easy Street is?
22 Seeing the sun rise, say
23 “Yo!”
24 Gone by
25 Message part 2
29 Number of numbers in numbered row
34 Messenger ___
35 Bridge pro Culbertson
36 Place for an ace?
37 Gentlemanly reply
40 Garden seasoner
41 Goes on stage
42 Fannie or Ginnie follower
43 All-purpose truck, briefly
44 Cook one's goose?
45 Message part 3
48 The big picture?
50 “Get my drift?”
51 Like a system with equal gains and losses
55 Popular chocolate bar
59 Message part 4
61 “Sayonara!”
62 Parisian pig meat
63 Lake, canal, or city
64 Palm tree or nut
65 Kind of terrier
66 Jet-setters' jets, once
67 Clear the leaves
DOWN
1 Iron fishhook with handle
2 Diva's delivery
3 Diplomacy breakdown
4 “You ___!” (“Right!”)
5 In use
6 Wire service inits.
7 Ceremony
8 Takes it from the top?
9 Lower California, familiarly
10 “Rubáiyát” poet
11 Olympic track champion Zatopek
12 ___-poly
14 Balks, as a horse
19 Rub the wrong way
21 Hyper, impatient ones
24 Practice a trade
25 Young chicken
26 Bridge bid, briefly
27 Jamaican in dreadlocks
28 With sudoku, address of house you went in
30 “ … sat down beside ___”
31 Show with a medley
32 Mrs. Peron
33 Angler of morays
36 “Aw, c'mon!”
38 Enero, por ejemplo
39 One who makes a scene?
40 Cleveland cager, briefly
42 Nation that celebrates Cinco de Mayo: Abbr.
45 New parents, usually
46 Betty Ford Clinic program, e.g.
47 Birdseed holder
49 Zaps the sound
51 Whizzes
52 “Return of the Jedi” creature
53 “Marco Polo” star Calhoun
54 Enough, for some
55 Bullfight bravos
56 Naldi of the Ziegfeld Follies
57 Stink
58 The season to be jolly
60 Burning
“It isn't solved. How do you know it's a blackmail note?”
“We made a copy. We solved it.”
“This is a copy?”
“This is the note. We solved the copy.”
“Where is the copy?”
“It's gone.”
“What did it say?”
“I don't remember. You'll have to solve it.”
Cora snorted in exasperation. “Oh, for Pete's sake!” She looked to Sherry for help.
“Oh, go ahead and solve it, Cora. But not the original. I'll make a copy.”
Sherry got up, took the puzzle, and went down the hall to her office.
Cora glared after her, then turned back to Michiko. “How'd your aunt get a blackmail note? She's in jail.”
“It came to the motel where we're staying.”
“You got a blackmail note at the motel?”
“It was under the door.”
“So you took it to your aunt?”
“I told you. I made a
copy
and took it to my aunt. In the jail. She solved it and we destroyed it.”
“In
general
, what did the puzzle say?”
“That someone knew what she did.”
“What did she do?”

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