The Riches of Mercy (47 page)

Meredith teetered forward, burying her face in Natalie's chest. Natalie held her. When she could breathe again, she said, "All right. I'll trade food stamps for that."

Rebecca chuckled. "The next hour is going to be terrible, Meredith. But I promise you, you get through that hour, and every one after will be just a little bit easier. Instead of the other way around."

That was the fear deep inside of Meredith. She nodded.

"We're not going to talk about maybes. If you get a promotion, if Natalie gets a full time job again. If the custody arrangement with the Jameisons changes. No expectations. We're going to talk about what you have, right now. And what you can do with it."

"Can we get cable?" Natalie asked.

Meredith shifted closer, holding Natalie close, squeezing her eyes shut, as a stranger dissected her life.

#

The diner was in the heart of Tarpley, and though Natalie didn't know everyone else sitting in the dim dining room at lunchtime, she suspected they knew her.

"Do you really want to put the county through the expense of a trial? We're poor people here," Weinstead said.

"Really? You're going to appeal to my morality? I used to be a prosecutor too."

Weinstead nodded. "But surely you know you could never win."

"Maybe it's not about winning. Maybe it's about making money throughout a trial, rather than having the well dry up so fast."

"There will be plenty of other cases."

"Not if I don't get anything out of this one. Who would want to hire the woman who got the sheriff's son sent to jail? Shouldn't she have been able to pull strings? Something?"

"Not my problem."

She took a sip of iced tea and glared at him.

He didn't quake. "And the way I see it, it's not really your problem, either. Luis, he's your problem. You can't take this to trial, Ms. Ivans. Even he doesn't want it."

"It's Natalie, and what are you offering?"

"Aggravated felony death, ten years."

"The max? I could go to court and get the max."

"And ask the jury to split hairs? If we went to court I'd go for first degree murder."

Natalie leaned back and gave him an incredulous stare.

"Concurrent?" He asked.

"Darn right it'll be concurrent."

"I'm not letting him go with community service. I have to answer to the families."

"I have to answer to the sheriff."

"We all have to answer to the sheriff. I don't want to get a speeding ticket every time I go through Tarpley."

Natalie shook her head.

"What does Luis say?"

"Luis says he's innocent."

"Maybe in a karmic sense, but not according to the North Carolina General Assembly. Who do you think a jury will side with?"

"I know who a jury will side with." Natalie sighed.

"So, what do you want?"

To go home to my family and hold them close and shut out the world. All the charity in the world was better than this job. "Drop the aggravated, five years, concurrent."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"It's in line with sentencing guidelines. Maybe a part of me believes in the fluke theory. Every day millions of drunks drive home and arrive safely."

"And every day millions of girls make it to their families unscathed."

"So, we have an unfortunate intersection of fate. Luis Duarte was barely drunk--probably not drastically incapacitated--and those girls were speeding."

Natalie thought of her own police report. She couldn't remember the accident, she would never know if reality reflected the white-washed sheet going to her insurance company, or the demonizing tale the victims were concocting for Luis. "This isn't statistics. A family is ruined forever. Shouldn't Luis be, too?"

"That's not the way justice works."

Victims didn't control the process for a reason. Her own children's grandparents would never stop grieving. A family lost a lifetime of weddings, grandchildren, joking around at holidays and smiling and hugging. They wouldn't have more children. No grandchildren. Irreplaceable. Gone. She couldn't ever see it as meant to be.

"You're right," she said.

"About what, Ms. Ivans?"

"I don't like my job."

# #

Chapter Fifty-Six

"I can do that," Meredith said, as Natalie carried her dishes to the sink. She'd changed after the hospital into jeans and a Wolfpack sweatshirt. Natalie was still dressed in slacks and a blouse from her client meeting and Meredith hated the idea of her splashing the clothes.

"I've got it."

Meredith glanced at the boys, who were in the family room, playing checkers. She got up and went to Natalie. "You cooked."

"What did you think?"

"You're a taco master."

Natalie turned on the sink.

"Really," Meredith said, putting her hands on Natalie's shoulders. "I can do chores."

"You worked all day."

"I won't break."

Natalie stiffened against her.

Meredith bumped Natalie's shoulder with her chin. "Let me take care of this."

"It's--"

"Let me take care of you."

Natalie didn't say anything. She turned off the sink.

Meredith nuzzled her back. "I'm sure readjustment will take a while. But I've got help. I'm dealing."

"I'm dealing, too."

"You're waiting," Meredith said. She risked Natalie's anger. Natalie was tense and unmoving. She kissed Natalie's shoulder.

"I'm being patient," Natalie said.

Meredith attempted to slide her arms around Natalie's waist, but Natalie turned around, facing her.

"Everything's great." Meredith said.

"Impossible."

Meredith cupped Natalie's face in her hands.

Natalie leaned forward until her forehead touched Meredith's.

"Stop waiting," Meredith said.

She tilted her head up, just slightly, and Natalie's lips found hers. The kiss was chaste and sweet and they drew back to glance at the children.

Beau was thinking hard about his next move.

Merritt idly petted Hollingsworth while he waited, posing like a super villain.

Natalie pulled Meredith into the hallway, toward the foyer. Out of sight. She kissed Meredith again, and guided her until Meredith's back was against the wall. Meredith closed her eyes as Natalie kissed her again and again. She wanted this unrestrained passion waking her up, making her want to grind into Natalie's hips already. They'd made love before bed, intense and serious and somewhat tired, avowing their connection, and they'd had playful romps in the afternoon, between shifts, between reality's crashes. But she wanted something to blot out the universe, to make her feel like a sinner, like the first time she'd taken Natalie, against all odds and all common sense.

She worked her way under Natalie's shirt, stroking her back. Natalie's tongue invaded her mouth. Meredith groaned, wanting more. She sucked on Natalie's tongue, hungering for deeper kisses, demanding them. Her hands moved from Natalie's back to her ass, pulling her closer, until her thigh was between Natalie's and she was pinned between her lover and the door. Natalie pushed against her, breaking the kiss and panting deliriously in her ear.

"We should--" Meredith tried to say.

Natalie moved back, taking her wrist and pulling her toward the bedroom at the front of the house.

"The boys."

"We'll listen. We won't go too far."

She shut the bedroom door and resumed her position against Meredith's thigh. Different wall, same shuddering movements. Meredith rubbed Natalie's hips, urging her closer, urging hot kisses against her lips, her cheeks, her neck. When Natalie's teeth found her earlobe, Meredith escalated, pulling Natalie's shirt upward. Natalie complied, lifting her arms, and the shirt fell to the floor and Meredith was unclasping Natalie's bra and slipping her hands underneath. Natalie's lips worried her shoulder. Meredith found the tip of a breast. Natalie pressed the front of her jeans.

A thud sounded in the living room.

"They knocked over the board," Natalie said.

"They have to learn to fight their own battles."

Merritt let out a shrill scream.

Hollingsworth yowled.

"They might break something," Natalie said.

"The precious furniture." Meredith gave Natalie a little push, reaching down to get Natalie's shirt.

Natalie reluctantly opened the door. "Boys?"

"See?" Beau said. "Nat's gonna be pissed at you."

"At you!"

"You let them say 'pissed'?" Mereidth asked.

"They think we can't hear them." Natalie pulled on her shirt.

"My children are not very bright." Meredith went into the living room.

Merritt pointed. "Beau cheated."

Beau folded his arms. "You destroyed the proof."

"Well, since checkers is over, let's take a walk while it's still light outside," Natalie said, behind Meredith.

Beau scowled. "I want to play again."

"Are there fireflies?" Merritt asked.

"And frogs."

"And neighbors," Meredith said.

Natalie offered her hand to Beau. He took it.

"A walk, really?" Meredith asked.

"The world awaits."

#

By the time they made it outside, it was fully dark. They stuck to the sidewalk under the streetlamps. The boys were excited to be out past dark. They strolled to the main road and back, passing dog-walkers who nodded politely and ignored Meredith and Natalie hand-in-hand.

"Did you--" Natalie wasn't sure what she wanted to ask. She didn't know how much of this life was hers, and how much was Meredith's alone.

"Did I do this with Vince?" Meredith shook her head. "The boys were practically babies, Natalie. Everything's new."

Natalie winked.

Meredith pulled her closer. "It's cold out here. You're warm."

Natalie hugged her shoulders and brought her against her chest.

Beau tried to climb a street sign pole.

"We'll never get them to bed," Meredith said.

"Benedryl?"

"Not on your life."

Natalie kissed Meredith, rewarded when Meredith squeezed her waist.

"Let's go back," Merritt said.

Natalie nodded.

"Okay, boys, whoever gets there first gets to pick which book we read tonight."

Beau took off running.

Merritt threaded his fingers through Natalie's.

Meredith took her other hand and they walked leisurely back toward the house. "What do you think he's going to pick?"

Merritt shrugged.

"
Jack and the Beanstalk
. He likes triumph," Natalie said.

When they got to the house, Beau was already in bed under the covers, grinning smugly.

Natalie sat on his bed. "Breath test."

He breathed on her, showing white teeth.

"Minty. Did you pee?"

"I wanted to be first."

"You were. Go pee and then pick your story."

Beau climbed out of bed.

Meredith got Merritt ready, and then tapped the top of Natalie's head. "I'm starting to like the way you do things."

Natalie grinned.

Beau came back and rifled through his books and produced
Jack and the Beanstalk
.

"What do I win?" Natalie asked.

"You'll find out later."

#

As soon as they closed the door to the boys' room, Natalie wanted to push Meredith against a wall again. The rush of arousal reawakening made her see spots. She leaned against the door and asked, "Should I take a shower?"

"No." Meredith shook her head.

"I'm sweaty."

Meredith walked toward their bedroom, glancing over her shoulder. "You've been wearing that blouse ever since I got home. Almost."

Natalie nodded.

"I want to take it off you."

Meredith shut the door of their bedroom, and then locked it.

Natalie took her by the arms and pulled her into a kiss. Meredith stumbled, clutching her sides, trying to hold onto the touch of her lips. Instead of the wall they landed on the bed, Natalie over Meredith. She took kiss after kiss as her weight held Meredith down. Meredith squirmed until her leg was between Natalie's. She groaned and then pursued the kiss. Natalie's arms were by her head, holding her up, and she couldn't last for long.

"Sit up," Meredith said.

Natalie pushed herself up with her arms, glad of the relief straightening brought her muscles. She straddled Meredith's hips, ignoring the twinge in her thigh.

"Is this okay?" Meredith asked.

"I'm fine."

"Maybe you should take some ibuprofen before--"

"Before we have sex? Merry."

"I'm a nurse."

"I'm not waiting," Natalie said.

"You're impatient?" Meredith asked, reaching for the hem of Natalie's blouse.

"What do you think?"

Meredith slid her hands underneath the blouse. "We could make this go faster."

Natalie twisted her hips, pressing down on Meredith.

Meredith closed her eyes. Her hands stilled.

"Who's impatient now?"

"You can't do that."

Natalie kept moving. "Why not?"

"I want to--"

"What?"

Meredith pressed her fingers into Natalie's sides. "I want to focus."

Natalie stilled, but when Meredith's eyes fluttered open, offered a mock pout. "You told me I didn't have to be patient."

"Please?"

The word was so sweetly and simply offered Natalie didn't move. Meredith cupped Natalie's breasts, squeezing, feeling their weight, before drawing back to lift Natalie's blouse.

"Help."

Natalie pulled the blouse off. Sitting over Meredith gave her a strange sense of power. She felt almost weightless, but it was Meredith's hands, back on her breasts, Meredith's heat under her, holding her imprisoned. Meredith unclasped her bra and pulled the straps down her arms. Naked from the waist up, facing Meredith's intense gaze of lust and scrutiny, Natalie was paralyzed.

Meredith cupped her cheek. "Natalie."

"Like what you see?"

"You're all I'll ever see. For the rest of our lives." Meredith traced Natalie's lips.

Lightness overcame Natalie, even as the ache in her leg intensified. "I think we should switch positions," she said, just as Meredith's free hand settled on her pants.