The Road to Pemberley (30 page)

Yes, he had seen a petite, well-endowed blonde girl among the upper servants. She would do nicely. He'd entice her and then turn his attentions squarely to securing Kitty Bennet.

Kitty made her way up the stairs and headed directly to Elizabeth's bedchamber. She wanted to see if Lizzy was any better, and if she was, Kitty sorely needed her advice.

The past few days had been so confusing. After seeing the parish house from top to bottom, Kitty couldn't help but be, as Denton called it, enchanted. She suddenly felt that a house similar to Longbourn would suit her perfectly. An estate such as Pemberley was
nice to visit, but she had a feeling she would never truly feel comfortable in such a grand home.

Seeing how much pressure Darcy was constantly under also gave her pause. Did she truly wish to have a husband with so many demands on his time? She would not mind if she could be involved and work side-by-side with her husband one day, but Darcy's duties were carried out solely by him. These thoughts, however, went against her longstanding dream to marry a rich man…a man like Lord Chalmer.

But she knew nothing significant about Chalmer, save for information about his ancestral home, Eddenwall, which he spoke of often. Eddenwall and fashionable dress seemed to fill the man's head, so much so that Kitty suddenly realized he had never asked about her thoughts or her life. He knew naught of her, her background, or her family, yet professed to love her ardently.

Then there were these startling feelings in her stomach whenever she was near Mr. Denton. The man was so easy to speak to, and she knew his entire background and he knew hers. He was such a well-cut man in every way—other than his purse.

And that was that.

Kitty's dream required a wealthy man, and so, she told herself, she would just have to get over all her worries about the size of the home and the duties of such a husband.

In her slippers, she padded down the hallway and found Elizabeth's chamber door open, but what she saw stopped her in her tracks.

Mr. Darcy had his back to Kitty as he ran his hands over his wife's face. A deep, low, heart-wrenching sob broke from his lips, and he dropped onto the bed. Gathering his unresponsive wife in his arms tightly, he rocked back and forth, with her against him.

“Fight, Elizabeth,” He left a trail of kisses down the right side of her face. “Fight this for me. I cannot…I will never…”

His voice broke and he seemed to pull his wife even tighter against him. Kitty knew she should turn and walk away, knew that it was improper to view her brother's tortured moment of despair. But something held her there.

She gawked at his unkempt appearance. She had never seen a man so undone. His hair fell limp over his eyes, his neck was bare, and his shirttail only half tucked in. Darcy's shoulders heaved as he wept.

“I cannot live without you, Lizzy, you are my very life. Speak to me, dearest, and tell me how I can make you better. I will sacrifice anything to make you well. You are the very core of me. I love you. I love you. I love you.”

Finally able to break her trance, Kitty backed away from the doorway without a sound. What would it be like to be loved as Elizabeth was loved by Darcy? Kitty doubted she would ever know such devotion.

Shaken by what she had just witnessed—her sister unconscious and Darcy broken—and by her own thoughts about her life, Kitty padded down the hallway like a ghost. She was a breath away from the grand staircase when a flash of puce caught her eye. It disappeared quickly around a corner, near where the servants' stairs must be. Had not Lord Chalmer been wearing a puce waistcoat that morning?

There was no reason for Albert to be in that section of the home. But, although Darcy kept his servants in excellent dress, their uniforms were black. None of them would have been so fashionably dressed.

Curiosity pushed her onward. She rounded the corner and pushed aside the curtain that hid the servants' staircase from view, only to fall back against the wall, her hands coming up to cover the gasp escaping her lips.

There before her was Lord Chalmer, his body pressing Alice—Kitty's lady's maid at Pemberley—against the wall. His lips drank of Alice's mouth as if she were living water, and his hands inched up her skirt. Alice's hands intermittently caressed his back and raked through his hair as she moaned.

Regaining her composure, Kitty balled her fists at her sides. “Lord Chalmer, how dare you!” she cried.

Chalmer staggered back, as if physically hit, and Alice froze to the spot, her face white. Spinning, Chalmer glared at Kitty, and it made her insides roil. “How dare
I?
How dare
you!
” His voice was a growl. “You little vixen! You've no right to be sneaking about this area, and I find it entirely unrespectable of you to creep up on a gentleman.”

Kitty knew she was shaking, but didn't know if it was with rage or fright. “A gentleman? I seriously find little proof of that in your current pursuit.” She spat out the words and turned to retreat, but Albert grabbed her arm and pinned her against the wall.

His voice changed to a purr as he grabbed her chin between his fingers. “Listen here, my trifling hoyden, it's about time you grew up and realized what the world is like. Did you truly think you alone could satisfy a man? Ha! Did you think that after our wedding, I would keep to just you? Ridiculous child!”

Albert released Kitty and straightened his waistcoat. He glanced over his shoulder at Alice, who stood, seemingly rooted to the spot, wringing her hands. “Be off with you, chit. Have you nothing to employ yourself with?” he barked at the little maid, and she rushed down the stairs.

Turning his attention back to Kitty, he spoke as if he were a solicitor laying out a transaction. “I will secure a special license, and we shall wed by week's end. You will grow used to these…happenings…but I promise to pursue my dalliances in a way that will not
bring undue embarrassment to you as my wife. In fact, I could be persuaded to take but one main mistress, whom I would keep in a separate apartment, which would alleviate gossip.” He bowed his head, as if making a great concession.

“But sir, I cannot desire marriage with a man who, even before the establishment of it, wishes another woman.”

“You speak such feminine drivel. My dear Kitty, there is not a man alive who does not have a mistress. It does not negate a marriage—a wife is first in a husband's heart, and a mistress is first in his bed. It ends up being a comfortable arrangement for all. Besides the point, you are growing older, no man has sought you out. What options besides me are afforded you? We are comfortable together and you will gain a title. I know we could have a successful marriage.”

Kitty shook her head. “No. I cannot believe it as common as you say. Mr. Darcy, for one, does not keep a mistress; he loves my sister and her alone. My papa—”

Albert's guffaw cut her off. “Are you completely blind? This is the way things are. You are right to say Mr. Darcy does not keep a mistress. No, he probably keeps ten. And you must have looked the other way when your dear papa went off for company.”

He could not be right. Darcy—ten mistresses? Surely not. Lizzy could not love him so dearly if that were the case. And Kitty knew well that her papa's only other company was that of his books and a comfortable chair in his library.

Lord Chalmer must have mistaken her silence for consent, because he pressed his body close, his fingers tracing her neck. “Is it that you are jealous, Miss Bennet? Because you need not be. We can away to my chamber this minute and fully explore each other.”

Her senses tingling with alarm, she shoved against him and tore down the servants' stairs, all the way down through the kitchen,
and then erupted out the back doors. She took in two huge gulps of air before taking off at a run toward the wooded hills. Head down, she charged forward, stumbling as she went.

She needed to think, to breathe, and, most of all, to be away.

Suddenly, she terribly regretted her words to Lizzy more than a month past now—when she had told her sister smugly that she would rather have fine carriages than someone who truly adored her. After seeing Mr. Darcy with Lizzy, Kitty didn't think she could ever be satisfied with anything less than the same dedication. But was there such a man in all the world who could love
her
like that?

Lord Chalmer didn't care for her in that way, but he was right about his offer, no matter how distasteful, was still her best…her only…offer. She didn't want to end up a spinster, a burden to her relations. Certainly, a marriage without love would be preferable to no protection or home of her own. Wouldn't it?

“Miss Bennet!” a familiar voice called out to her. Kitty spun and spotted Mr. Denton picking his way over the field toward her. She took in his wide shoulders and sighed. He was such a well-cut man, although not quite as tall as Mr. Darcy.

Conrad's gut clenched while he watched sweet Miss Bennet palm her tear-streaked face and endeavor to smile in his direction. He would find out what had caused her unhappiness.

“Mr. Denton! How good it is to see you. I am out for a walk just now, but I promise you I will be on the alert for foxholes.”

He laughed. “Take my arm, Miss Bennet, and I will walk with you and protect your feet from any evil that might be lurking in this very field.” Kitty took Denton's arm as he winked at her.

He tucked his other hand over hers as she rested it in the crook of his arm. In a subdued tone, he said, “Unless my eyes deceive me,
Miss Bennet, you have been crying. Please unburden yourself and tell me as a friend what troubles you.”

Kitty heaved a sigh. “You have been a good friend to me, Mr. Denton, but I fear that you will grow weary of hearing all my dark thoughts.”

“Have no fear on that account; I could listen to you talk all day without tiring. Your voice has quickly become one of my favorite sounds.”

It was brazen of him to say such a thing, but he was rewarded by a brilliant light in her eyes and a small upturn of her rosebud lips.

“Oh! Mr. Denton, I believe I have made a right muddle of my life.”

“You know how I feel about muddles—speak on,” he encouraged her.

“I do not believe I will ever find a man who will cherish me as I am. You see, Lord Chalmer wishes to marry me speedily, but I have lately learned that he has no intention of remaining faithful to me as his wife. I do not believe another option is open to me, however. I forfeited all that in the folly of youth,” she said, drooping her head.

His fingers tightened around her hand as she spoke. Lord Chalmer was a right blackguard! What man could want the company of another woman when he had sworn before man and God to love just one with heart, body, and soul? Especially when that woman was Kitty Bennet? A man would have to be daft not to see what a treasure this woman was. Even burdened by terrible circumstances, she had chosen to smile at him and pretend she hadn't been crying. Miss Bennet had more strength than he had ever seen in a woman. His own sister, Phoebe, had needed constant encouragement when she was down, and getting her sister to open up with her thoughts had required hours of work. But Kitty, she didn't dance around the truth. Conrad asked a question and she answered him honestly. He loved that about her.