The Rose of the World (32 page)

They made an early start and reached Acquin as the sun was setting. Josse, as excited as a boy, pointed out to her the tall watchtowers and the strong wall that surrounded the house and the outbuildings. There was a note of pride in his voice. Even though he had left his ancestral property in the care of his brothers many years ago, she reflected, still the homecoming clearly meant a great deal to him.

She reined in her horse and let him ride ahead of her into the courtyard. He called out, ‘Halloa, the house!' and a round-faced, brown-haired man emerged from a door at the top of a short flight of steps.

Helewise recognized Yves, for he had once come to Hawkenlye to seek out his elder brother. She watched as Josse leapt off his horse and the two men embraced. But then, almost immediately, Josse broke away and, his hands on his brother's shoulders, said, ‘Where's Ninian?'

She knew, even before Yves spoke. She saw his face fall as he shook his head. He said something she did not catch.

‘How long?' Josse demanded and, when Yves muttered his answer, Josse spun away from him and violently punched his fist into his opposite palm.

He came to stand by her horse. ‘He's gone,' he said. ‘We missed him by just a few days.'

She felt his crushing disappointment as if it were a fever in him. She put out her hand and gently touched his face. ‘Josse, dearest Josse, we will go after him,' she said. ‘We will not give up. Not yet.'

Yves came over to them, greeting her with a low bow. Straightening up, he frowned in puzzlement. ‘My lady?' he said.

‘No longer an abbess, as you rightly surmise, I think.' She smiled down at him, and he held out his hand, helping her to dismount.

Yves was far too polite to question her, although she saw the interest and curiosity in his face. ‘Whatever your condition, lady, it is a pleasure to welcome you here,' he said.

Josse, clearly impatient with his brother's good manners, could contain himself no longer. ‘He was here, then? Ninian reached Acquin safely?'

Yves turned to him. ‘He did. He was here for a couple of days, and then something happened.' Briefly, he told them the stark details of how his own stable lad had sold information concerning Ninian to the man who had come looking for him. ‘We fully believed more men would follow, for if one knew to look for him at Acquin, others would surely do so too. I took steps to protect my family, for we had seen one death already. But nobody else came!' He raised his shoulders and spread his hands in a gesture of amazement. ‘We could not understand it.'

‘I believe I can,' Josse said grimly. He looked at Helewise. ‘We know that Olivier de Brionne is missing. Whoever it was who came here hunting for Ninian appears to have been alone. It is likely, I would suggest, that the man was Olivier.'

‘Why would he be hunting Ninian?' Helewise asked, very aware of Yves watching, his face screwed up in incomprehension.

‘He tried as hard as he could to make everyone believe that Ninian was responsible for Hugh's death,' Josse replied. ‘He must have realized that Ninian would protest his innocence and, all the time he was alive, there was always the chance that he would succeed. Then, as indeed has happened, we would look round to try to see who else might have killed Hugh.'

Helewise, horrified, whispered, ‘You think he has come here to kill Ninian?'

‘What better way is there of silencing a man?' Josse said bitterly. ‘We know why Ninian had to flee but, for someone trying to implicate him in a crime he did not commit, the fact of his flight could be used to argue his guilt. We must go—'

‘You will go nowhere this evening but into the great hall of Acquin, where we will do all we can to refresh and restore you,' Yves said firmly. ‘Yes, I know you want to turn round and set off right this instant, Josse, but it's getting dark and it will be a cold night.' He looked at Helewise, smiling. ‘You will persuade him, my lady, to be sensible?'

Despite everything, she laughed. ‘I have rarely been able to do that,' she said. ‘But I do think you are right, Yves. Josse?'

To her relief, he grunted his agreement.

Helewise was very impressed by the speed with which Josse's family made arrangements for a feast. Only a short time after their arrival, she and Josse found themselves the guests of honour in the great hall at Acquin, seated on sturdy chairs padded with cushions and set either side of Yves and his wife Marie at the top of the table. Dish after dish appeared, borne along the passage from the kitchens by a line of servants. The wine was French and a great improvement on anything that was available to all but the very wealthy back in England. It was a shame that neither she nor Josse felt much like eating. For the sake of these kind and generous people who were clearly so delighted to have the head of the family back with them, they accepted everything they were offered, but Helewise could see Josse did not really want to be there. He wanted to be off on the road, following Ninian.

Josse waited until the rest of the household had retired for the night and only Yves remained. The brothers were finishing the last of the wine. Josse turned to Yves and said, ‘Helewise and I will leave early in the morning. We will—'

But it became apparent that Yves was not going to pass up this chance of a private conversation. ‘When did she leave Hawkenlye?' he demanded. ‘And where does she live now?'

Josse sighed. He did not want to discuss the thorny question of Helewise but, on the other hand, his brother had a right to ask. ‘She has her own quarters in my household,' he said. ‘She left the abbey in the summer, although she was allowed to stand down as abbess some years before that. For her final years as a nun, she lived in a little cell and tended a chapel close to the abbey. And, before you ask, I'm not going to discuss exactly why she left, for I am not entirely sure I understand.'

‘She loves you,' Yves murmured. ‘And I know you love her, too.'

‘Aye,' Josse said heavily.

Yves, ever sensitive and tactful, thankfully did not press him further.

After a while Josse said, ‘Where has Ninian gone, Yves? We'll go to him, wherever he is, and take him home.'

Yves looked down at his hands, slowly turning the empty wine goblet. ‘He would not tell me. He said it was better for all of us if nobody here knew where he was heading.'

Josse nodded. ‘Aye, I can imagine why. But, Yves, surely he gave some hint?'

Now Yves looked slightly happier. ‘As a matter of fact, I was able to extract a clue from him. I asked him what I was to do if ever you came looking for him, and I pointed out that I should feel wretched if I could offer you no help in finding him.'

‘And he saw the sense of that?'

‘He did. He told me to tell you that he's going to the place you suggested. He said you'd know what he meant.'

‘The place I suggested,' Josse repeated. He thought hard. ‘But I suggested that he came here. I didn't—'

Then he remembered. It had not originally been his suggestion; it had come from Gervase. Relief flooded him, accompanied by a sinking of the heart. The place that Gervase had mentioned was a very long way away.

‘I think I do know,' he said softly. He gave his brother a rueful grin and told him.

He had not expected such a reaction. Yves's face paled, his eyes expressed his shock and he breathed, ‘But he can't go
there
!'

And he told Josse why.

Josse leapt to his feet. ‘I must go and get him back! I must leave now – there's no time to waste!'

Yves grabbed his sleeve and pulled him down again. ‘You can't go after him, Josse! You won't find him – it's just impossible. Go home. Take Helewise and return to England. Only God can protect him now.'

Josse barely heard. He was filled with just one desire: he had to talk to Helewise, and it would not wait. As soon as he decently could, he detached himself from his brother's anxious presence and went to find her.

In the morning, Josse found he simply could not set out for the coast before at least trying to find a trace of Ninian. Helewise, looking at him out of anxious, loving eyes, agreed that they would follow the road south for just one day. As she pointed out, if they failed to pick up his trail very soon, then there was little hope they would stumble across it later.

They said their goodbyes to the family. Yves, who had a little knowledge of the south-east of England, promised that he would come to find them back at the House in the Woods. In a bleak leave-taking, it was the one consolation.

They rode south all day. They stopped soon after dark in a small town, and Josse found lodgings for them in the house of the priest. He was happy to offer them hospitality in exchange for news of the outside world and, when he discovered they came from England, he was overjoyed.

It was late in the evening, and the priest was more than a little drunk when he revealed the one item out of the ordinary run of small town life that had recently happened. A body had been found on the road leading south out of the town, stone dead. The body bore grave wounds, one of them swollen with suppuration. A fine horse had been grazing nearby.

Josse's fuddled brain instantly cleared. ‘Who was this person? Man or woman?'

The priest, clearly gratified at having such an interested response, elaborated. ‘A man, in his twenties, with brown hair and a square-jawed face. He was well dressed, and his horse was most handsome: black, with a star-shaped mark on his brow.'

There seemed nothing else to do but turn for home, although it took half a day of Helewise's most eloquent reasoning to persuade Josse of that painful fact. ‘Ninian is gone, Josse,' she said, aching for the pain she saw in his eyes, ‘and although we know where he is heading, it is far away. Yves has told us what is happening there and—'

‘There's danger there!' he interrupted. ‘We must stop him, catch him before he gets there and—'

‘Josse, he has many days' start on us!' she interrupted in her turn. ‘How are we to find him in all of the vast heart of this land? By some wonderful chance we found this place, and we can return with the huge blessing of knowing that, with Olivier de Brionne's death, the greatest danger to Ninian no longer exists.'

‘There's no need for him to be a fugitive now!' Josse cried. ‘He can come home!'

Home. The word undermined her, and for a moment she could not speak. Then, reaching for his hand and folding it between both of her own, she said softly, ‘He
will
come home, Josse. But not through any action of ours.'

He pulled his hand away. ‘You go back if you like,' he said coldly. ‘I'll go after him on my own.'

His words cut right into her heart. Tears filled her eyes, and surreptitiously she wiped them away. When she could trust her voice she said, ‘Your daughter, your son and all who love you have already borne the pain of seeing Ninian ride away. Will you put on them the further burden of knowing you have hared off after him because that action, risky and futile though it is, is easier for you than gathering your courage and your resolve and going home?'

There was silence for a long time. She heard the echoes of her own words and noticed absently that she had addressed him in exactly the same tone as when she had been abbess of Hawkenlye. It was agonizing but no surprise, then, when eventually he gave a deep sigh and said, ‘You are right, my lady, as usually you are. We will go back.'

That night they stayed in a dirty, run-down inn where the fleas jumping on the soiled mattresses forced them both to sleep on the floor.

Lying awake, closely wrapped in her cloak and both her blankets, Helewise tried to get comfortable. She knew Josse was awake, not more than an arm's length away, but there was a distance between them that had nothing to do with their physical presence. She wept, the tears silently running down her face and into the high collar of her gown.
I love him
, she thought,
and I believe that I have lost him.

Would it have made any difference if she had behaved differently since going to live in the House in the Woods?
Of course it would
, the sensible part of her answered. They would still have had today's devastating argument, and she would still have persuaded him, for she knew she had employed unfair tactics by reminding him of his family and, once she had done so, there had only been one possible outcome. But oh, if they had already taken that great step that she knew they both wanted, and become man and wife in law and in body as they already were in heart and spirit, then she knew in her very bones that, argue as they might, this night they would have lain in each other's arms and made it up.

She heard his voice again in her mind.
You are right, my lady, as you usually are
. Dear God, if he had added
abbess
after
my lady
, the two of them could have been back in her little room at the abbey, disputing hotly from their accustomed positions either side of the large oak table that had always divided them.

Was she still abbess, then? In her soul, was she still a nun? She turned over, trying to pad her cloak under her hip bone. Deliberately, she made herself go back over the long and painful months and years between her first doubts and her final decision. It was not that she no longer loved God and wished with all her heart to serve him; it was that she had lost her faith in the church which men had built in his name.

She thought now of what Yves had told them of the horrors in the south. It was the ultimate persuasion, had she needed it, that she had been right.

She felt drowsy at last. She stretched out a hand to Josse's broad back, stopping just short of touching him. In a couple of days, they would cross the narrow seas back to England. She knew what she must do: she must reinforce as often as she could that they'd
had
to go back; that to go on after Ninian would have been useless and might well have cost both of them their lives. She must say, every day,
he is young, he is strong, he is resourceful
. And, more often than any of those phrases,
he will come back.