The Sagas of the Icelanders (108 page)

BOOK: The Sagas of the Icelanders
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5
Halldor Snorrason was a large, handsome man, the strongest and most courageous of men in battle. King Harald bore witness to the fact that of all the men who had been with him, Halldor was the one who was least affected by shocks; whether faced with mortal danger or joyful news, he was never more or less happy than usual. He never ate food or drank or slept more or less than he was accustomed to, whether the times were good or bad. Halldor was a man of few words. He spoke abruptly and frankly, was sharp-tempered and rough, and highly competitive in all things with anyone he had dealings with. This caused trouble with King Harald when he had enough other men to serve him. That is why they got on so badly together after Harald became King of Norway.

When Halldor reached Iceland, he set up a farm at Hjardarholt. A few summers later, King Harald sent a message to Halldor Snorrason saying he should enter his service again, and that his respect had never been as great as it would be if he agreed to go; and that he would place him higher than any other man of low birth if he accepted this invitation.

When the message reached him, Halldor replied with these words: ‘I will never go to meet King Harald from this time forth. Each of us now can keep what he has got. I am aware of his character. I know perfectly well that he would carry out his promise to place no man in Norway higher than me if I went to meet him, because he would place me on the highest of gallows if he had any say in the matter.’

And when King Harald was growing older, it is said that he sent Halldor word that he should send him some fox-skins. The king wanted to have them made into a blanket to go over his bed, because he felt he needed more warmth.

When this message of the king’s reached Halldor, it is said that at first he uttered the following words: ‘The early rooster is getting old,’ he said, but he sent him the skins.

They never met again after they parted in Trondheim, even though that time things had been a little abrupt. He lived in Hjardarholt until the end of his life, and became an old man.

Translated by
TERRY GUNNELL

 
THE TALE OF SARCASTIC HALLI

Sneglu-Halla pdttur
*

 

I
The beginning of this story is when King Harald Sigurdarson was ruling over Norway. That was in the period after the death of his kinsman, King Magnus. It is said that King Harald was a very wise and very shrewd man. Almost everything that he counselled turned out well. He was a good poet and always mocked whomever he pleased. And when he was in a good mood, he was extremely patient even if abusive obscenities were directed at him. At this time, he was married to Thora Thorbergsdottir. Thorberg was Ami’s son. Harald took great pleasure in poetry and always had people about him who knew how to compose poems.

There was a man named Thjodolf. He was an Icelander whose family came from Svarfadardal. He was a well-mannered man and a great poet He was on very warm terms with King Harald. The king called him his chief poet and honoured him above all his other poets. Thjodolf was of humble origins, well brought up and envious of newcomers.

King Harald loved Icelanders very much. He gave Iceland many valuable goods including the good bell for Thingvellir. And when the great famine came to Iceland – and such another has not come – he sent four knorrs loaded with flour, one to each quarter, and he had a great many poor people transported from Iceland.

2
There was a man named Bard who was one of King Harald’s followers. He sailed out to Iceland, landed at Gasir and took lodgings there for the winter.

A man named Halli, nicknamed Sarcastic Halli, took passage to Norway with Bard. Halli was a good poet and a very impudent person. He was a tall man, long-necked, with narrow shoulders and long arms, and was rather ill-proportioned. His family was from Fljot.

They sailed as soon as they were ready and had a long passage. That autumn they reached Norway north of Trondheim at the islands called Hitra, and then sailed in towards Agdenes and lay up there that night. And the next morning they sailed into the fjord with a light breeze. And when they reached Reine, they saw three longships rowing out down the fjord. The third was a dragon-ship. And as the ships were rowing past the trading vessel, a man dressed in scarlet and with a golden band around his forehead came out on the poop deck of the dragon-ship; he was tall and of noble bearing.

This man spoke: ‘Who commands your ship, and where did you stay this winter, and where did you first make land, and where did you lie up last night?’

The merchants were nearly struck dumb when so much was asked all at once, but then Halli answered, ‘We were in Iceland for the winter, and sailed from Gasir, and made land at Hitra, last night we lay up at Agdenes (Agdi’s Ness), and our skipper is called Bard.’

This man, who in fact was King Harald Sigurdarson, then asked, ‘Didn’t Agdi fuck you?’

‘Not yet,’ said Halli.

The king grinned and spoke: ‘Is there some agreement that he will do you this service sometime later?’

‘No,’ said Halli, ‘and one particular consideration was crucial to our suffering no disgrace at his hands.’

‘What was that?’ asked the king.

Halli knew perfectly well whom he was talking to – ‘It was this, my lord,’ he said, ‘if you’re so curious to know this: in this matter Agdi was waiting for nobler men than ourselves, and he expected your arrival there tonight, and he will pay you this debt fully.’

‘You are being extremely impudent,’ said the king.

What more they said at that time is not known. The merchants sailed on in to Kaupang, unloaded their cargo and rented a house in the town.

A few days later the king returned to the town; he had gone out to the islands on a pleasure trip. Halli asked Bard to take him to the king and said he wanted to request winter quarters, but Bard invited Halli to stay with him. Halli thanked him but said that he wanted to be with the king if that option were open.

3
One day Bard went to meet the king and Halli went with him. Bard greeted the king. The king acknowledged his greeting warmly and made many enquiries about Iceland and also asked if Bard had brought any Icelanders to Norway.

Bard said he had brought one Icelander – ‘and his name is Halli and he is here now, my lord, and wishes to ask to stay for the winter with you’.

Then Halli went before the king and greeted him.

The king received him warmly and asked if he had been the one who answered him in the fjord ‘when we met you and your companions’.

‘I’m the very man,’ said Halli.

The king said that he would not withhold food from Halli and asked him to stay at one of his estates. Halli said that he wanted to be at court or look for a place elsewhere.

The king said that it always turned out – ‘that I get blamed if our friendship with you doesn’t go well, even though that seems hardly likely to me this time. You Icelanders are stubborn and unsociable. Now stay if you wish, but you are responsible for yourself whatever happens.’

Halli said that it would be so and thanked the king. And then he was with the king’s followers and everyone liked him. An old and agreeable follower named Sigurd was Halli’s bench-companion.

King Harald’s custom was to eat one meal a day. The food was served first to him, as would be expected, and he was always very well satisfied by the time the food was served to the others. But when he was satisfied, he rapped on the table with the handle of his knife, and then the tables were to be cleared at once. Many were still hungry.

It happened on one occasion that the king was walking in the street attended by his followers, and many of them were not nearly satisfied. And then they heard a noisy quarrel at an inn. It was a tanner and a blacksmith, and they were almost attacking one another. The king stopped and watched for a while.

Then he said, ‘Let’s go. I don’t want to get involved in this, but, Thjodolf, compose a verse about them.’

‘My lord,’ said Thjodolf, ‘that’s hardly suitable considering that I am called your chief poet.’

The king answered, ‘It’s more difficult than you think. You are to make them into altogether different people than they really are. Make one of them into Sigurd Fafnisbani (Killer of the Serpent Fafnir) and the other into Fafnir, but nevertheless identify each one’s trade.’

Then Thjodolf spoke a verse:

 
1.
Sigurd of the sledge-hammer goaded

Sigurd
(legendary hero)
of the hammer
: the blacksmith;

the snake of the scary skin-scraper,

snake of the skin-scraper
: the tanner

but the scrape-dragon of skins

scrape-dragon of skins
: the tanner

slithered away from the moor of socks.
moor of socks: floor
Folk feared the serpent, fitted out
with footwear, before the long-nosed king
of tongs set about him,

king of tongs
: the blacksmith

the serpent of ox-skin.

serpent of ox-skin
: the tanner

 

‘That is well composed,’ said the king, ‘and now compose another verse and make one into Thor and the other into the giant Geirrod, and nevertheless identify each one’s trade.’

Then Thjodolf spoke a verse:

 
12.
Thor of the great bellows threw

Thor of the bellows
: the blacksmith

from the malicious town
of taunts jaw-lightning

town of taunts
: mouth;
jaw
-
lightning
: abusive words;

at the giant of goat-flesh.

giant
(i.e. enemy)
of goat-flesh
: the tanner;

Gladsome Geirrod of the worn
skin-scraper from Thor’s forge took

Geirrod of the… skin-scraper
: the tanner;
forge
: mouth

with sound-grippers sparks

sound-grippers
: ears

from that smithy of spells.

smithy of spells
: mouth; its
sparks
: abusive words

 

‘You’re not over-praised,’ said the king, ‘when you’re called a master-poet.’

And they all applauded the verses as well composed. Halli was not present. And that evening when people sat drinking they recited the verses for Halli, and said that he could not compose like that even though he thought himself a very good poet.

Halli said that he knew he made worse poetry than Thjodolf did – ‘I’ll fall especially short, if I don’t try to compose a verse, and even more so if I am not present.’

This was reported to the king and represented that Halli thought himself to be no less a poet than Thjodolf.

The king said that Halli would probably not be that – ‘but it may be that we can put him to the test soon’.

4
One day when people were sitting at table, a dwarf named Tuta came into the hall. He was Frisian by descent. He had been with King Harald for a very long time. He was no taller than a three-year-old child, but was very thick-set and broad-shouldered; he had a large, elderly-looking head, his back was not noticeably short, but below, where his legs were, he was cropped.

King Harald had a coat of mail which he called Emma. He had had it made in Byzantium. It was so long that it reached down to King Harald’s shoes when he stood upright. It was all of double thickness and so strong that no weapon ever pierced it. The king ordered the dwarf to be dressed in the coat of mail and had a helmet placed on his head, and he girded a sword on him. After that Tuta walked into the hall as was written above and the man seemed a wonder.

The king called for silence and then announced: ‘The man who composes a poem about the dwarf which to me seems well composed will receive this knife and belt from me’ – and he laid them on the table before him – ‘but understand clearly that if I think the poem is not well composed, he will have my displeasure as well as lose both possessions.’

And as soon as the king had made his announcement, a man on the outermost bench composed a poem, and he was Sarcastic Halli.

 
3.
A kinsman of the Frisians’ clan
appears to me in chain-mail clothed.
Decked out with a helmet, the dwarf
goes round the court in ring-mail.
At dawn he never flees the fire,
our Tuta, veteran of many kitchen raids.
I see swinging by the side
of the rye-bread’s waster a sword.
 

The king ordered the prizes to be given to Halli – ‘and you are to have them by right because the verse is well composed’.

One day when the king was finished eating, he struck the table with the handle of his knife and ordered the tables to be cleared. The servers did so. Halli was far from being satisfied, so he took a chop from the dish, kept it and spoke this verse:

 
4.
I don’t give a damn
for Harald’s hammering.
I keep my moustache munching on
and full-fed I go to bed.
 

In the morning, when the king and his followers had taken their seats, Halli came into the hall and to the king. He had his sword and shield slung over his back.

He spoke a verse:

 
5.
For butter I’ll have to barter,
oh king, my sword and,
speeder of the clash of shields,

clash of shields
: battle; its
speeder
: king

my red buckler for bread.
The helmsman’s warriors hunger.

helmsman
: ruler, king

We walk around really wanting food.
For sure my belt draws ever nearer
my backbone – Harald’s starving me!
 

The king did not answer at all and acted as if he had not heard, although everyone knew he was displeased.

Another day, the king was out walking in the street with his followers. Halli was in the procession. He rushed on past the king.

The king spoke this:

 
6.
‘Where are you heading, Halli?’
 

Halli answered:

‘I’m briskly running to buy a cow.’

‘You’ve probably ordered some porridge,’

 
 

said the king.

‘When buttered, it’s the best of food,’

 
 

said Halli.

And then Halli ran into a house and thence to a kitchen. He had ordered himself a stone-kettle of porridge there, and sat down and ate his porridge.

The king saw that Halli had gone into the house. He summoned Thjodolf
and two other men to look for Halli. The king went into the house. They found him where he was eating his porridge. The king came to him and saw how Halli was occupied. The king was very angry and asked Halli if he had come from Iceland and visited chieftains in order to create scandal and gossip.

‘Don’t talk like that, my lord,’ said Halli. ‘Constantly I see that you do not reject good food.’

Then Halli stood up and threw down the kettle, and the handle rattled against it. Then Thjodolf recited this:

 
7.
The handle rattled and Halli
has pigged out on porridge.
A cow’s-horn spoon better suits him,
I say, than something fine.
 

Then the king went away and was very angry.

And that evening food was not served to Halli as it was to the others. And when people had been eating for a while, two men came in carrying a large trough of porridge with a spoon and set it before Halli. He set to and ate as much as he wanted and then stopped.

The king ordered Halli to eat more. He said he would not eat more at that time. Then King Harald drew his sword and ordered Halli to eat the porridge until he burst. Halli said that he would not burst himself on porridge, but the king could take his life if he had made up his mind to do that. Then the king sat down and sheathed his sword.

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