The Scarred Prince (The Wolf's Pet Book One) (3 page)

“You might, later. It’s different when you’re still growing up. Maybe one day you’ll see someone you’ve known your whole life, and then you’ll see them in a totally new way.”

“Maybe. I don’t think so. I don’t care about any of them at all.”

“It’s alright to just have friends for now.”

“Sure,” I said, sarcasm slipping into my voice. “If I had any friends.”

Apart from a few of the younger cubs who looked up to me, I hadn’t made friends in the pack. Well, Dee. But she didn’t count. All of the girls my age stayed away from me. I don’t know if it was because I was the daughter of the alpha, or because I was so awkward it hurt.

Either way, I didn’t care. I did my schoolwork, I helped Dee, and I kept my head down. Once I grew up, I could move away. To college, maybe, or somewhere else. Traveling. Someplace that wasn’t here. This place was home for everyone else, but it wasn’t home for me.

“I worry about you sometimes, honey.”

“Yeah, well, don’t.”

“Telling a mother not to worry about their child is like telling the rain not to fall on your head.”

“Maybe you should get an umbrella.”

She sighed.

“I only want you to be happy, Kinaya.”

I was silent. She didn’t care about my happiness, not really. All of these preparations had been for Blaise. It felt like every birthday leading up to this one had been fake, and now I was seeing the true side of everybody. And nobody cared about me, not really. Blaise was the new alpha male. He would be the one to lead the pack. Not me. I was a pale imitation of him, a shadow behind my twin brother.

“Kinaya—”

“Stop it! Just leave me alone! I’m fine!”

She left me, not making a sound as she padded down the stairs gracefully. God, she was so graceful.

I tossed and turned. My mom had been pressuring me to find a mate since I was thirteen. Honestly, I didn’t care. I mean, I thought about boys, but not like that. Not with any boys here.

My eyes darted to the door. Quickly I made my way across the bare floorboards. The wood was cold under my feet. I locked the door and ran back to bed, jumping under the covers.

Forget the rules. I want some privacy.

I pulled the top blanket under my chin and closed my eyes. In the darkness, I didn’t have to think about the feast or any of the preparations. My breathing grew slower, deeper. I tried to make my body sink back into the mattress. I hated thinking about my awkward body. I wished it would disappear. In the darkness, it could.

Under the blankets, I touched myself. My breath caught in my throat as desire clenched my body tight.

A mate…

I didn’t think of any of the boys in the pack. How could I? None of them were men. I hadn’t ever felt the Calling with any of them. When I touched myself, I thought about somebody else. I didn’t know what his face looked like. He was a shadow in my mind.

But in my mind, he held me with strong arms. In my mind, I let him take off my clothes slowly. First my shirt, then my pants. Then…

“
Ohh,
” I murmured. My fingers stroked my panties. Between my thighs, I tingled. His face was obscured, but all I needed to see were his hands. They moved along my body, caressing my skin, then gripping me hard. I rocked against my hand as I imagined him behind me, pressing against me.

Kinaya.
The voice whispered in my ear. It was a growl, a low whisper that rumbled through my body and sent the tingle into a full-blown ache. I twisted under the blanket.

You’re my mate.

Half-dreaming, half-awake, I writhed in pleasure. I could feel the ghosts of his kisses on my neck, my back. Again and again I stroked myself, biting back the moans so that nobody in the house could hear.

The shadow pinned me down to the bed. I could almost feel the hands on my shoulder, the dream was so real.

My fingers rocked back and forth, pressing harder. My eyes clenched shut. I imagined him above me, his weight on my body. It felt real, so real. I rocked faster, my breath coming in short gasps.

For all of my imagining, I didn’t know what sex would actually feel like. Some of the prettier girls in the pack had already been there and back again, but I didn’t dare to ask them. How could I? We weren’t friends. And yet, now, as I imagined him mounting me, penetrating me, I clenched inside and nearly burst with the ache of pleasure as I clamped my legs against my hand.

Kinaya.

His breath was hot. His hands were tight, I felt them on my whole body. Burning, burning, red hot. I plunged my hand between my thighs and bit my pillow to keep from crying out as I neared the top of my peak. My hands were slick with sweat and something else. My heart pattered in my ears. Then, through the beating of my body, I heard something.

“Kinaya?”

I gasped, sitting upright, all of my blood rushing to my face. There was a shadow just behind the door, but I could tell the scent instantly. Blaise knocked slightly, not loud enough to wake anyone else up.

“Kinaya? Are you asleep?” he whispered.

My cheeks were burning. I was glad it was dark. With three strides, I was at the door and unlocked it. Then, before he could even open the door, I had jumped back into bed.

Blaise didn’t say anything else to me, only got into the bed on his side of the room. I turned to the wall, shame burning through my body. I was sure he knew what I was doing. He didn’t say anything, though, and soon he was snoring slightly.

Frustration boiled in my blood. Frustration over the whole birthday feast, frustration that I hadn’t gotten the release I needed. Frustration that I shared everything, everything, with my twin brother who took all of the glory and attention and gave nothing.

Of course he could sleep. He didn’t have anything to worry about.

Tomorrow,
he
would be the alpha.

Chapter Four

When morning came, I trundled down to the kitchen table still in my pajamas before Blaise could get up. The floorboards were cold under my feet, and I sighed as I caught a cinnamon scent wafting from the kitchen. I’d hoped to be the first one up today, but—

“Surprise!” My mom waved a spatula in the air. “Your favorite! Cinnamon pancakes!”

I smiled weakly at my parents. The smell of cinnamon filled the kitchen and my stomach growled.
Traitor
.

“Thanks, Mom,” I said. I wasn’t sure what to do. I didn’t want to get pulled into a family breakfast, but those pancakes smelled good. And Blaise wasn’t up yet… I shifted my weight at the doorway.

“Well come on and sit down,” she said. “Happy birthday!”

“Happy birthday, sweetheart,” my dad said, pulling me over and planting a kiss on the top of my head. I plunked into a seat. It was nice to have both of my parents to myself, if only for a little while.

“Do you feel older?” my mom asked, turning back to the pancakes.

“I feel a whole day older than yesterday,” I said. “It’s
incredible
.”

“Don’t you sass me,” my mom said, grinning.

“Go ahead and sass her all you want,” Dad said. “It’s your birthday.”

“Damien!”

I laughed at the expression on my mom’s face. It felt good to be here, and as my mom served out pancakes onto my plate, I looked at my parents and thought about what it would have been like if I had been an only child. Just me… and them. A warmth ran through my chest.

And then I caught his scent.

“Hey everybody,” Blaise said, coming in and plopping down in his chair.

“Happy birthday!” Dad said. Mom came over to serve him pancakes.

“Man, it’s like an early birthday feast!” Blaise said. “This is great. Thanks! I can’t wait for this afternoon…”

I frowned as Blaise continued yammering about what he was going to do with his friends before the feast. The image I had of us as a family dissipated. It was always about Blaise whenever he was around. He had a way of filling up the entire room once he came in.

Thankfully, he had to take a break from talking in order to eat. His dark red hair fell over his face as he dug into his pancakes. His hair wasn’t frizzy at all, and he looked almost as handsome as my dad. Every day I looked at a mirror of myself, one who was better in every way.

It was
terrible
.

They were talking about the birthright ceremony when my thoughts drifted back to the table.

“What does birthright mean, exactly?” Mom asked. “Is it a rule of the pack, or something else?”

“Shifter tradition,” Dad said.

“Hnmph, tradition,” I mumbled, but nobody heard me.

“It’s tradition for the alpha to hand down control to his son once he’s of age,” Dad continued. “If anybody wants to challenge the new alpha, they can.”

“Challenge?” Mom asked. “This is the first I’ve heard of that. What does that mean?”

“Nobody’s going to challenge me,” Blaise said confidently. “But I’ve been practicing just in case.”

“We’re a peaceful pack,” Dad said. “There’s no reason to challenge the alpha. If someone is unhappy here, they can always bring up their concerns in the pack meetings.”

“Alright,” Mom said, exhaling a sigh of relief. “As long as you think he’ll be safe.”

Of course she would be worried about what would happen to Blaise. He was their favorite. I slouched in my seat, picking at my pancakes.

“And once I’m alpha, I can pick my own security guards,” Blaise said. “I think I’ll pick Erroll and Francis.”

I rolled my eyes. The two dumbest jock boys in the pack. Of course he would pick them.

“That sounds like a good idea,” Mom said. “But maybe you can ask your father for advice.”

“What about the girls?” I interrupted.

“Girls?”

“I’m not having girls as my security guards,” Blaise scoffed.

“No, that’s not what I’m asking. I’m asking about girls like me. Why don’t we have a birthright?”

“Because you’re not made out to be rulers,” Blaise said. He was so nonchalant that it made me want to puke.

“Is that so?” I asked sarcastically.

“That’s so.”

“Dee says that long ago, women ruled the packs and the alphas were just leaders of hunting groups.”

“Yeah, but nobody really knows what happened back then, do they?” Blaise said. “She could be making all that up.”

“Shut up.” I hated it when he questioned Granny Dee.

“Children…” Mom said.

“Why are you scolding me and not him?” I asked. I was exasperated. “He’s the one who started it.”

“I’m not scolding anyone,” Mom said. “I’m asking you to stop arguing.”

“Well, ask him!”

“You want to be the alpha?” Blaise snorted through his orange juice.

“Shut up,” I said.

“Who would follow you into war?” he asked.

“We’re not in a war.”

“We could be. Anytime we could be. That’s why it’s important to have a strong alpha.”

“It’s more important for an alpha to be fair-minded,” I said. My dad was just sitting there, listening to us argue. He had a calm expression on his face. I knew he’d said a million times that it was better to fight smart than to fight strong. I looked over at him, even though I knew he couldn’t see my look.

“Sure, yeah, but if we had to fight,” Blaise said. “I’d be great in a war.”

“You talk about it like you
want
to fight.”

“It would be fun!”

“
No.
”

We both looked over at Dad. He had his hands clasped in his lap, and he didn’t look mad. But he didn’t look happy, either.

“War is never fun,” he said.

“Sorry, dad,” Blaise said. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Sure you didn’t,” I muttered.

“I gotta go,” Blaise said, tossing his fork down onto his plate. He had already finished the pancakes off. “We’re practicing sparring. In case anybody tries to challenge me.” He waggled his eyebrows in my direction.

“I’ll challenge you,” I muttered under my breath.

When he closed the door behind him, I sighed.

“How can someone so stupid lead the pack?”

“Don’t call your brother stupid,” Mom said. “Anyway, he’ll have lots of guidance for the first few years. It’s not like we’re going to let him go off and start a war. Don’t worry about it.”

My dad turned to me. Sometimes when he faced me, I thought that he could see me. Even with his blind eyes.

“You’ll be a fine leader someday, Kinaya,” he said.

“Yeah, right,” I mumbled. I shoved more pancake into my mouth.

“It may not be in the way you think. You may not be an alpha like Blaise. But I know you’ll do great things. Maybe you’ll have a wonderful career after your studies.”

“I don’t even know what I want to study,” I groused.

“Maybe you’ll start a family—”

“Seriously? Are you and mom conspiring to get me married off in two seconds?” My fork clanged against my plate.

“What’s wrong with that?” my mom asked.

“I don’t
want
to get married.”

“Ever?” Mom asked.

“Ever
. You talk about it like it’s the only thing a girl can do. Why does Blaise get to be the alpha, and I get jack shit?”

“Don’t use those words.”

I stood up from the table.

“I’m sick of sitting around while he gets handed everything on a silver platter.”

“Kinaya—”

“I’ll see you at the feast tonight. Thanks for the breakfast.” I threw my napkin down on my plate and stormed out angrily.

Chapter Five

I moped around the woods, avoiding Blaise and the rest of the older guys. It was afternoon by the time all my mopes had moped, as Granny Dee would say. Little Ana even gave me a birthday present, a painting she’d done herself. She handed it to me shyly.

“I hope you like it.”

“It’s beautiful,” I said, trying to make out the painting.

“It’s you as a princess,” Ana said helpfully. “See? You have a crown.”

“Oh, of course.” I smiled and gave her a hug. “It’s the best. And the dress even looks like the one I’m going to wear tonight.”

“I wish I could stay up late so I could go to the feast.” Ana pouted.