The SEAL's Second Chance Baby (10 page)

Her sleepy half smile produced an unwelcome yearning in his chest. In that instant, he wanted Effie and her sons and daughter to be
his
. He'd treat them the way a man should—with appreciation and honor. They'd lack for nothing—emotionally or financially.
If
they were his. But they weren't—never would be. Which made him a fool for even thinking about it.

The rest of the short trip to the elementary school, Marsh focused on driving rather than dwelling on his urge to once again hold Effie's hand. He wouldn't focus on how good it made him feel that Effie had trusted him enough to call in a crisis.

A glance in her direction showed her eyes closed and breathing even. She'd dozed off, too.

If he had any sense of self-preservation, he would have been clinical about the day's events. He wouldn't wonder if he should start paying more attention to Colt if a positive male role model might stop his tantrums and inappropriate stunts. Marsh sure as hell wouldn't think about how lessening Effie's worry would increase the number of times he saw her smile.

At the school, he pulled into the space beside her van but didn't want to let her go. She was in no shape for driving, and after the day he'd had, Colt's broken spirit needed healing, so Marsh left the lot and aimed for the lone road heading out of town.

He'd no doubt have hell to pay once Effie woke to find herself even farther from her van, but that was okay. He'd be more than happy for the excuse to see her again tomorrow when he drove her to pick it up.

The long trip home was quiet.

The last thing Marsh needed was more time for introspection, but somehow, this felt different—better. The sensation of once again contributing rushed through him like a long exhale. After years of feeling useless, he'd again found purpose. But it wasn't supposed to have happened this way.

In her moment of crisis, Effie might have thought she and her brood needed him, but in reality, it was the other way around. He'd been trained to help. That's what he did. He learned of a problem and fixed it. Applying his SEAL values and never-quit attitude to his family had been a natural extension, but then he suddenly had no family and the bottom fell out from under him.

He'd been adrift.

Now, with Effie softly sleeping beside him, his chest swelled with pride for the fact that she felt comfortable and safe enough in his presence to so completely surrender.

But like him, she too had no business depending on anyone. They'd both been badly burned in different ways, and that pain didn't just go away. It forever lurked in dark emotional corners. For all of Marsh's satisfaction in this moment, he couldn't ever fully invest in this woman and her beautiful children, because the pain of possibly losing them would be unfathomable.

Chapter Eleven

Effie woke disoriented.

But then she saw her grandmother's ragtag house on one side and Marsh's handsome profile on the other, and the horrible afternoon flooded back.

“You're awake,” he said before turning off the truck's engine. “I'll take you to get your van in the morning. You and Colt looked so wiped, I didn't have the heart to wake you.”

“Thanks. It's been quite a day, and I still need to give Mabel the full story. I'm ashamed my son acted that way.”

“Don't do that—blame yourself.” He looked to ensure Colt was still sleeping. “There were a ton of elements in play. First, I've never heard of a bank allowing such young kids in sensitive areas, and the police were doing their job, but the second they saw the culprit and his toy weapons, they should have realized this was something to laugh about, rather than make a big fuss. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying what Colt did was good, but half the battle with kids is not putting them in situations where it's all too easy for them to fail. If Colt had been taken on a field trip to the library or a museum, he'd have had a great day.”

“I hear you, but when does personal responsibility come into play? He knows better. I get that he thought he was playing a great game of Old West cops and robbers, but when I told him to stop, he should have. Where have I gone wrong as a parent that he thinks it was all right to not only take money, but then run with it? And keep running until he had to be physically restrained?” She broke down. “Even my horses are trained better. I feel worthless as a parent. Lower than low.”

“Well, don't.” He unfastened his seat belt and pulled her into another hug. “If you want, I'm here to help and together, we'll figure this thing out.”

“Thank you.” Effie melted against him, soaking in his quiet strength. She could have let him hold her like this forever. But shouldn't. Experience with her ex taught her for every second of pleasure and trust and support, it took days—years—to recover. She couldn't take that risk.

How did she reconcile that fact with the plain and simple truth that Marsh had been a rock for her and her son when they'd needed him most?

She closed her eyes, breathing Marsh in. He smelled incredible. Like the earth and wind and sun-warmed leather.

“Mom! Mom!” Remington called while running across the yard to the truck. “Is Colt still in jail?”

Effie bolted from Marsh to compose herself. The last thing she needed was for her grandmother to catch sight of a simple hug and read more into it.

“Thanks again,” she said to Marsh.

“No problem. Glad I could help.” Unbearable sweetness rushed through her when he discreetly took her hand for a final squeeze. “Seriously, whenever you need me, don't hesitate to call.”

“I appreciate your offer more than you could ever know.” Meeting his intense stare felt akin to looking too long into the sun, so she lowered her gaze, willing her hammering heart to slow. “Want to stay for dinner?”

“Eff...”

“I'm sorry. You must have things to do.” Upon catching hesitation play out across his face, Effie regretted asking. They were barely friends, and already he must think of her as a clingy mess.

“Always.”

“I understand.” But she didn't. Being in his arms felt like home, but that was a mirage. An unwitting trick of fate she mustn't fall for again—not that Marsh had in any way encouraged her confusion. If anything, he'd been straightforward from the start. She was the one who'd misconstrued his simple kindness for more. She was the one constantly curious about what it might be like to share a kiss. She was the one who'd apparently forgotten the pain of pinning all her hopes and dreams on a man, only to have him leave.

“Let me at least grab Colt for you.” Marsh nodded toward the backseat. “He's pretty out of it. I'll carry him straight to bed.”

“Yes. Thank you.” Wishing he'd change his mind about staying, yet alternately knowing it was best if he didn't, she exited his truck to open the back door. After hugging Remington, she held his hand all the way to the house until he left her to open the screen door for Marsh and Colt.

“Is Colt dead?” he asked after Marsh set his brother on his bed.

“Hush.” Mabel clasped Remington's shoulders, drawing him against her. “Come with me to the kitchen, and leave your brother alone.”

Effie removed Colt's tennis shoes. Her mothering instincts told her to cover him, but it was far too warm for that, so she made sure the window was open, turned on the ceiling fan, then crept from the room, hyperaware of Marsh's presence behind her.

He closed the door. “His time in the big house must have taken a toll. He's zonked.”

“Good.” Effie leaned against the nearest wall, finally allowing herself to exhale. More than anything, she longed to step right back into Marsh's strong embrace. She wanted him to hold her and promise everything would be okay. But that was silly. Not only didn't life hand out guarantees, but she'd made it this far on her own, and just like any other crisis, she'd handle this one, too.

What if I don't want to?

Ah, there was the real issue. Late at night, deep in the most secret place in her heart, Effie struggled with the fact that she'd grown weary of facing her every joy and challenge alone. Sure, she had Mabel and her kids, but they were hardly the same as having a true partner in life—the kind of everyday companion she'd once had in her ex. Those early days of their relationship had been heady, painfully similar to the pleasurable tingles she felt whenever she and Marsh shared the same space.

“You do know worrying won't help?” Marsh alternately teased and thrilled her by running his finger along the twin frown lines between her brows. “Colt's going to be fine.”

“I know.” What would Marsh say if he knew she hadn't been ruminating on her troubles with her son, but him? What kind of mom did that make her?

She covered her face with her hands.

“Now what's the matter?” he asked.

“You wouldn't understand.”

“Try me.”

After a shake of her head, she couldn't help but grin. She was a basket case. Thank goodness mind reading wasn't one of Marsh's superhuman Navy SEAL skills.

“Arrrggghh!”
Cassidy rolled her walker from the kitchen into the hall fast enough to slam into Marsh's legs.

“Dang, girl.” He knelt to honk her ride's horn. “Do you have a license for that thing?”

She cooed and giggled and held up her arms to be picked up.

Of course, Marsh obliged, and for Effie, the sight of her daughter being held in his sturdy embrace made her all the more confused. On the surface, he seemed to be everything her ex wasn't. But that brought no guarantees.

People—just like hearts—changed.

“Marsh, hon!” Mabel called from the kitchen. “Should Remington set a place for you at the supper table?”

Effie held her breath while waiting for his answer.

Had she imagined it, or had he tightened his hold on Cassidy?

“Thank you, ma'am, but I should be getting back. Wallace is expecting me.”

“All right. Well, at least let me make the two of you a couple of plates to go.”

“Thank you, ma'am,” he said in the kitchen.

Effie trailed after him. Was she the reason he wasn't staying? Because she'd hit a bump in the road with Colt, and instead of handling Colt's troubles on her own, she'd called him crying? Her ex had once told her he hated it when she was needy. Ever since, she'd made a point of trying to be independent and strong. But sometimes that was hard.

“That was some stunt that little rascal pulled at the bank.” Mabel removed the casserole from the oven, then took one of her best Tupperware bowls from the cabinet.

“I hoped you would let me sleep on it before drilling me for details.”

“Fat chance.” Mabel snorted. “News that your great-grandson is a juvenile bank robber spreads pretty fast. Marsh, thank you for helping Effie get it all sorted out.”

“Oh—I didn't do much.” He leaned on the door jamb. “Just lent moral support.”

I appreciated you being there more than you could ever know.

“Sometimes, that's the best help a body can give.” She snapped the lid on the container she'd just filled. “Y'all have salad dressing over at the bachelor pad, or should I send that, too?”

“I'm sure Wallace has a bottle of something stashed in his cabinets.”

“Ha!” She shook her head, and took an unopened jar of Thousand Island from her pantry. “Just in case, better take this.”

“Thanks.” Marsh accepted the gift with a smile. “Effie, what time do you want me here tomorrow to take you to your van?”

“Nine—if that's not too early. I'll send Remington on the bus, but Colt and I have a meeting with the principal at ten, and I don't want to be late. Pretty sure my homegrown Jesse James is expelled.”

He winced. “Sounds like a fun morning.”

“I know, right?”

Mabel finished assembling the care package and handed the loaded brown paper sack to Marsh. “If he's booted from school, that boy should do hard labor.”

“Agreed,” Effie said. “I'll fill his days with so many chores that school will seem like a vacation.”

“Wallace and I have plenty for him to do at our place, too. We'd be happy to take him off your hands for a day or two.”

“Perfect,” Mabel said. “I want him transformed into a gentleman by the wedding. I have enough to worry about without wondering if one of my ring bearers is up to no good.”

Marsh laughed. “Understood. I'll see what I can do.”

With dinner in hand, their guest made his goodbyes, then left.

The moment his truck left the drive, Effie said, “Why did you accept his help with Colt's punishment? He probably already thinks I'm a nutcase for having him come to the station.”

“Know what I think?” Mabel had a spark of mischief in her eyes. “That man's as sweet on you as you are on him. In fact, Wallace and I both were just saying—”

“You talked about this imaginary romance you've fabricated between Marsh and me with his grandfather?
Why?
”

Instead of answering, Mabel blew her a kiss. “Why not?”

* * *

T
HE
NEXT
MORNING
, Marsh showed up at Effie's five minutes early. Ominous clouds threatened to dump a gully washer any second, and he'd hoped to get Effie and her precious cargo in the truck before the storm started.

He knocked on Mabel's screen door in time to catch one helluva commotion.

“I don't wanna go! The police are gonna get me!” Colt ran out the door. Too bad for him, Marsh was there to catch him.

“Whoa. What's the hurry?”

“Mr. Marsh,
please
save me! Mom's taking me back to jail!”

“Good morning,” Effie said.

“Morning.” While Colt hid his face in the crook of Marsh's neck, Marsh tipped his cowboy hat in greeting. “Everything okay?”

Cassidy rode her mama's hip. Her eyes were red and cheeks tearstained.

“No, Mr. Marsh, I'm not okay.” Colt clung tighter. “She's crazy if she thinks I'm going back.”

Lightning cracked and thunder boomed.

The baby burst into tears, as did Colt.

Damn.
Marsh forced a deep breath. “Colt, wanna know a secret?”

The boy nodded.

Marsh whispered in his ear, “I know where your mom's taking you, and it's not to jail.”

“How do you know?” he whispered back. “Because she said we're going to school, but I don't believe her.”

“Well, you should. You have a meeting with your school principal. She's sad about how you acted at the bank and wants to talk to you.”

“What about the scary policeman?”

“He won't be there.”

“Promise?” he asked with a sniffle.

Marsh nodded.

“Will you go, too?”

“If your mom says it's all right.”

“It's fine,” Effie said, “but we need to get going to beat the rain.”

She passed off the baby to Mabel, then all three of them dashed to the truck just as the deluge started.

By the time Marsh reached the end of the drive, golf-ball-size hail had begun to fall. The pounding against the top of his truck made an awful racket.

He pulled to the shoulder and Colt scrambled into the front seat to sit on his mother's lap.

“Think it could break the windshield?” Effie asked, cradling her son.

Marsh shrugged. “Hope not, but anything's possible.”

“What if the ice hits our eyeballs?” Colt asked.

Laughing, Marsh said, “I thought Remington was the only one worried about his eyeballs.”

“I worry, too,” Colt said. “But I'm not a big baby and always telling everybody.”

“Oh, okay.”

There was a certain intimacy and peace to sitting in silence together while riding out the storm. Maybe if their situations were different, Marsh would have held Effie's hand, stroking his thumb reassuringly over her palm. For now, he took pleasure in passing time with her and her son.

When the hail stopped and only rain fell from the still gloomy sky, Marsh had Colt scramble back to his seat so they could resume their journey.

With Colt making
vroom
noises while driving a Matchbox Corvette across his window, Marsh said to Effie, “You were worried about how Mabel would take all of this. Once I left, how did things go?”

“Perfect. She never said a word. Sometimes I wonder if I'm my own harshest judge. Like because of what happened with my ex, I automatically assume blame when in reality, sometimes stuff just happens.”

“I know the feeling. Wonder if there's a support group for that? It's-my-fault-aholics?”