The Second Betrayal (31 page)
Read The Second Betrayal Online
Authors: Cheyenne McCray
"When Kristin headed off to Harvard," he said, "I went into black ops." Donovan shook his head. "It was like being a mercenary ten times over."
I put my hand on his knee and squeezed, but he didn't seem to notice.
"Our missions were quietly approved and funded by a branch of the military," he said. "My job was recovery. To rescue specialist kidnapped soldiers and kidnapped operatives that no one knew existed. I didn't just recover people, though. I recovered objects, military secrets—anything that needed recovery."
"That's probably one of the reasons why Oxford wanted to hire you so badly." After all, we were RED, the Recovery Enforcement Division.
Donovan nodded. "I was good at what I did. Damned good." His brilliant blue eyes seemed to dim as they clouded with what had to be memories I wasn't sure anymore were something I wanted to know about. "Too good," he added softly.
"What happened?" I asked.
He looked down at my hand, which I'd rested on his knee. "One of our ops had to do with going after a major terrorist responsible for... tragedies that we as a country still have not come to grips with."
Chills prickled my spine. I didn't know what was coming, but it wasn't going to be good.
"Except we weren't supposed to just recover him." Donovan met my gaze again. "We were ordered to eliminate him."
"Something went wrong," I stated.
"We were fed bad intel." His eyes seemed even more clouded with pain. "I was captain of our squad and I trusted our source."
I held my breath.
Donovan looked at me with so much remorse on his face that I wanted to bring him into my arms and hold him tight.
"I should have had my men do some of our own recon."
He blew out his breath. "We were given a building and a specific time that the terrorist would be meeting with followers in an Afghan village."
Christ. Here it came.
"My squad prepared hours ahead of time " he said. "We had that building wired with so many explosives, they wouldn't find any pieces left to identify.
"One of my men was ready to blow the whole fucking place with the single remote." Donovan's throat worked as he swallowed, and my chest was hurting like an elephant was standing square on it. "I picked up my long-range
binoculars and adjusted them so that I could see better.
"It wasn't until then that I saw the children being herded into the building."
Horror built up inside me, welled like boiling water in a pot.
"I yelled at my man to abort, as loud as I could." He gritted his teeth before he continued. "I didn't give a shit who heard me even though there were Afghan soldiers all around us who hadn't been aware we were there."
I closed my eyes, knowing what was coming.
"My operative didn't hear me." Donovan's throat worked again. "And we blew those children all to hell."
Donovan braced his elbows on his thighs and put his face in his hands. I didn't know what to do. What to say. The
horror of what his team had done, what he'd had to live with, was too great.
"The Afghan soldiers captured every man on my team," Donovan said when he raised his head. "We were beaten, tortured. A couple of men were killed. For a while I was too numb to care. I felt like I deserved it.
"After a while I realized I had to get my men out of there. I couldn't let them continue to be brutalized." He shrugged, a very noncasual shrug. "I escaped, helped to get every one of my men out of there. My men who were still living.
"I never saw the children's faces. The children we killed." Donovan looked at me again. "But I see faceless children in my dreams and my waking thoughts. Every single day of my life."
I buried my face against his shirt and slid my arms around his waist and held him. Soon he gripped me tight in his
arms and we clung to each other for a long time.
We slept together that night, but all we did was hold each other.
In the morning I woke to see Donovan propped up on his elbow looking down at me. His face was so serious as he
met my eyes. "I don't know how you've done it, Lexi," he said, and I knew he was really serious because he'd used my first name. "But I care for you in ways I've never cared about another woman."
"Donovan," I started, but he put his hand over my mouth.
He moved between my thighs and spread them apart before he thrust his erection into me, hard.
He took me so deep and fast and so unexpected that I came within moments. My cry surprised me, and with every
stroke my body vibrated.
When he climaxed, he shouted out my name. He throbbed inside me and I kissed his jaw as his breathing came in
ragged puffs. A drop of his sweat splattered on my chest.
Donovan rolled over onto his side, bringing me with him. "I love you, Lexi," he said, his voice soft, quiet.
Shock rolled through me. I couldn't move.
I didn't say anything. I couldn't say anything. All I could do was close my eyes and pretend he hadn't said those words.