The Secret of the Emerald Sea (9 page)

Chapter Twenty-Two

After her carriage ride with the young Stirling, the Cupid watched Jane carefully. She had told him of their ride and of their shy conversations, her skin flushing with pleasure and embarrassment under the Cupid’s avid gaze. He gloried in the changes love brought to the girl’s eyes. He saw the way her face softened into dreamy wonder and anticipation when she daydreamed. He knew who she thought of at these times.

On the island, he’d waited in vain for the hands of destiny to grasp him and push him forward. When the young girl had come, with her strange tales of supernatural worlds and sea creatures, it had all become clear. He had known from the start that Jane would be the first to feel his power, and he had kept much from her as he set their course toward the fulfillment of his desires. He still remembered that pivotal moment on the island when she’d told him a Cupid should “unite lovers.”

To unite the lovers with his arrow was the most satisfying thing that had ever happened to him. It had sent shocks through his tiny body...ripples of pleasure that were felt over and over again as he thought back to that fateful night. He knew not how the whole romance would play out, but there was little doubt in his mind that, since the arrow hit Blake Stirling, the young lord would think of little else but the charming blond girl who was likewise bewitched. It was a certainty that Jane would be linked to both of them with the arrow.

“I must see Stirling,” he whispered as Jane slept close beside him one wintry night. “I must see the two of them together, see my work.” He felt a strange unease, though, as he stared down at the girl’s sleeping body. Her pale face and body were like a marble statue, a statue of a goddess, and her mouth was so soft and rosy pink. He remembered the night they’d flown over the storm as high as they could. He remembered how he had kissed her, fully a man at last, but not the same inside as he was during the day —
not at all
!

He had been freed...freed of his terrible curse and the tiny body that shamed him so much. He had loved her that night, and he still longed to protect her, even as he continued his schemes to push her toward a relationship with another.

The Cupid felt strange inside, and soon, he also felt the old familiar pain that had not returned since the night they had been close to death on the raft.

Then there were the terrible stabbing pains in his back, and he knew it was coming...the transformation that hurt him so much. It had not come for so long, he had almost told himself it was all over. For in truth, he could not control it, and it had been so long now. He felt sad to lose his wings, his power, but grateful to be free of the wracking pain that seized him and made him scream as though he was dying.

He groaned and sweat broke out on his forehead, and his skin started to glow green-white. He grabbed a pillow and smothered his moans as the pain grew worse. Jane stirred in her sleep, but did not waken.

Cupid ran toward the door as the pain accelerated. All the while, he fought the urge to cry out the haunting cry that had sent Jane searching the island that day they met. He closed the door that led to the snowy acres beyond their farmhouse and he ran out into the night wearing only his small boots and covered in a heavy cloak he had grabbed from a wooden peg near the door. He shivered against the cold as he ran for the dark, wooded forest. Would he have enough time?

Their home was in a secluded place. He had been pleased to note this when they arrived there for the first time. He knew the thick forest would be the perfect place to hide when the change came. He headed for a spot he had found near a small cave, moaning in pain. Although it was winter and the trees branches were heavy with snow and the ground was pure white, the night was still dark without a full moon. He finally allowed himself to cry out more loudly, and he felt the fear that always overcame him when the buds began to push through his tiny back.

He felt the blood pound in his temples. It was really happening!

He screamed out into the night air like a wounded bird, and his cries turned to desperate growls as he began to float over the forest floor, growing larger, his new, heavy limbs those of a man. The pain receded as he stared down at the snowy forest with his star sapphire eyes. Quietly, so quietly, euphoria took the place of agony.

I mustn’t go too high
, he reminded himself, his huge wings flapping gently against the sky.

He could not control himself, though, because it had been so long since the last time. Soon, he was rising so high, over the roadways and fields surrounding the village. So high, that he felt butterflies in his stomach. He cared not that Jane was alone. He cared not that some creature might see. He was free. He thought for a moment of flying onward, flying anywhere, anywhere he could be free. Back to the island where there was no one to see or care, or to a new place, a place where he did not need to hide his true nature.

At last, I’m free again,
he thought, staring out at the blue-black sky that surrounded him. He felt all the power in his muscled legs and his powerful chest. He felt all the vigor and passions of a man.

“Jane...” he whispered into the cold air as he gently banked and turned back toward the forest once more. “I must protect you.” The girl was all alone and his head cleared, the ecstasy receding as he realized the chance he was taking right now, flying where anyone on the ground could see.

He had always believed his powers were only visible to those who were not human. Why he felt this, he was not certain, but he had no proof that others could not witness the change. Of course, they would not know he was the little boy in the village, but it would cause such talk, and trigger some sort of witch hunt.

As he flew over the village road, back over the thick forest that would hide him once more, he saw a figure in the distance, so far away he could hardly make it out. Man or woman, girl or boy, he didn’t know. He quickly banked in the air, turning away from the silhouette that had suddenly stopped moving. He knew the figure was watching him. He cursed under his breath and prepared to land some minutes later in order to wait out the night.

He could go into the farmhouse, of course, where it was warm, but he felt no discomfort and had no earthly needs in this current state.

“Who was it?” he asked aloud as he ran his hands through his hair, hovering just above the ground. He prolonged his landing and stared down in joy at his man’s body. His folded wings felt as light as gossamer despite their amazing strength. There was no pain now, only a dark, sensual feeling of pleasure that warred with his worried thoughts of the person on the road who had watched him so quietly. In this state, it was difficult to be unselfish and hard to be rational.

He wanted to
fly
. He wanted to show the whole world what he really was, and to flaunt his power. He must think of Jane, always, but tonight it was so hard. So long he had waited and paced the secluded patch of forest he had selected, wondering when the change would come once more. He always dreaded it and desired it at once.

He looked like a man, a tall, handsome man, and yet he knew, since Jane had told him, that there was an unnatural glow to his skin, and glimmering jewel brightness to his eyes when he was in this state so that he seemed to glow in the darkness. He might seem human to someone at a distance, when he was not in flight, and his wings were folded behind his body, but he would never pass as a man in company.

“Always, I must pretend,” he whispered, frustrated.
Anyway, as soon as my feet touch the ground, at first light, I am doomed to change back, and so no one will be able to say who it was.
And he set himself fully upon the ground just as dawn broke, and then he was a boy once more, though his mind was caught between the two states of being.

He thought of Jane as he hid in the forest, still unwilling to go back into the farmhouse to gaze upon her beauty and her innocence. He knew he loved her when he was in the air and a man, though she was now only fifteen and he would have to wait so long to really know her as a young woman and not a girl. The mere thought of Lord Stirling still filled him with a blue-burning anger.

She should be mine, and yet, it is my doing that her heart burns for another
...
I cannot understand,
he thought sadly.
By day, I destroy what I long for by night
. And he walked about for a while, a strange, small figure in an ill-fitting cloak that was much too large for him.

There were tears in his eyes as he sat down in the snow, imagining the night he’d plucked his first arrow and killed his own love. He did not know why he was so different when he was this creature, but he was, and he could not reconcile the differences in his heart.

He knew his wings, his power, were a gift, but they were a dark gift, they were dangerous...to his heart and soul, and to his Jane.
She must never know what it costs me...to be this way. She must never know all the things I have done to guide her and...manipulate her.

The sky lightened into true morning. His heart sank as he felt the heat of the sun grow stronger, and he knew he would always remember this dark night. He would never be the same. Each time he transformed, he also evolved. He carried the memories of his flights and his passion within his heart.

He would go inside now and feign sleep for a while, pleading a stomachache to Jane, who would fuss over him as she always did when he was ill.

He already felt different inside. The little boy he was trapped inside of was not really a child, but still, his cool, calculating mind was different from the winged creature who seemed made up of only intense love and spontaneous desire.

His dark night of the soul ended as the Cupid fully took over, plodding back through the thick snow to the farmhouse where Jane still slept, and he curled up in a ball near her body. It was warm and cozy, and he appeared angelic as always.

* * * *

When Jane finally awoke, she turned to the Cupid, as she always did, and stroked his hair gently. He seemed so pure and tiny and guileless that she could not help but smile when she looked down upon him.

She moved quietly to boil water for tea, so as not to disturb him, for he slept deeply and she wished for him to rest. It was a Saturday, after all, and there was nothing pressing that they must do. She sipped her tea and gazed out at the shimmer of ice melting on the ground, and the dark undersides of the snow-capped branches.

“What a beautiful day,” she whispered, thinking of Blake as she always did at this hour. She smiled to herself, a sweet, quiet smile, wondering if he was thinking of her as well. Somehow, she knew he was, and the certainty of it filled her with joy and even pride. She threw on her cloak to go for a walk, as the Cupid was clearly exhausted. As the front door closed, she turned her head to glance back, and his blue eyes opened slowly, met her own for just an instant, and then closed again.

Chapter Twenty-Three

On the dark, deserted pathway that led to the main road to town, Liesel had watched it all. She had felt the hairs stand up on the back of her neck as the creature moved through the sky above her.

My God, what is it?
she had thought, frantic, for she had seen all manner of creatures, human and god and otherwise, but never had she seen such a thing, a man who had the wings of a falcon or an eagle.

He is so beautiful,
she had found herself thinking, and then she had wondered why he would be there, hovering silently over the tiny, nondescript village. She thought for a moment that he might be an angel, one who had come to reproach her for the deal she had made on the banks of the River. On that desperate night when nothing had mattered any longer except getting the one thing she
must
have.

She felt a shiver of fear travel through her heart as she imagined the vast, white wings, the glowing eyes, and the strong, chiseled features of the creature. “Could he be an emissary of the gods?” she whispered, gathering her cloak tighter around her body. Suddenly, she felt frozen right to the bones.

“But of which god?” she muttered, confused and worried. She didn’t want to believe in any of them, these ancient Roman gods who controlled one in this life and the next. Magic had taught her the tricks the powerful could use to make one think they were invincible. Sometimes she wondered if the gods were merely witches and warlocks who had learned these tricks to the highest level of mastery.

Is there really a Jupiter? A Minerva? Are there other worlds and the
River and all manner of punishment, forever and ever
?
Or is it only the
highest of spells...the trick of all tricks
? But she knew, deep down, that it was true because she had felt Minerva’s power throughout the cave on the night when they’d first met, and it had flowed through her, and it had awed her, though she would never admit to it. And then there was Hecate, whose evil was like poison that chilled the heart.

Minerva could have given her
everything
. She had the power to save her from whatever lay beyond, and from that terrifying, guttural voice that came from her own throat as she whispered the last few words of the dark and secret incantation. Tears welled up in the crone’s now youthful eyes as she walked.

I am afraid
, she thought angrily.
I am afraid of what’s to come.

Liesel had her own power now. It had been given to her that night. She was, as yet, unsure of exactly what she could do, but she looked forward to finding out. She was certain the girl was close, for she knew that the children of gods attracted other such beings, and perhaps the flying creature was sent by Minerva to watch over the princess and protect her.

I’m not afraid!
the witch told herself. She walked on in the growing light with just a little bag of goods over her shoulder, and an old cloak that could have belonged to a beggar. Her young face was unremarkable, plain, against the drab clothes. As she trudged on, she wondered how she would deal with this new problem. This creature might be another one of her enemies, and she was almost sure he was.

But she was not totally convinced that he was
good
. Although he had been far away, she had seen his face, illuminated and glowing green- white, against the ebony sky. His features had been lit up by his amazing eyes.

She sensed a sort of kindred spirit in the creature. His passions seemed to roil through his body, as though he was also tortured or fueled by his own desires. She wondered if perhaps there might not be a way to use him, to make things easier...to exact her revenge.

The sun was rising higher now, and the village looked picturesque and quaint in the growing light with snow topping every thatched roof. She wondered which little house contained the girl she now hated so intensely. She still hated Minerva the most, though, and she would punish her though the girl, and punish her severely. And when she did, she would have Blake for her own with his soft, chestnut hair and his pure heart. She knew such kind eyes betrayed a loving soul.

Liesel had her plan. The angel, or whatever the creature was, added another dangerous element to the mix. She knew she must be wary, for others were against her and she hadn’t much time left to be...young. She remembered her craven face in the looking glass in the cold, gray cave where she had lived for so long, and she shuddered.

I don’t have much time
, she repeated to herself.
I must find out just what powers I do have, and use them. I must get what I want...before it all disappears
.

She quickened her step, turning suddenly away from the town, for another idea had occurred to her, and her new plan was undoubtedly clever and sound. She walked with new purpose toward her destination, a smile pasted onto her features. In her heart, though, light still battled with darkness and despair.