The Seraphina Donavan Collection: Contemporary (3 page)

She raised her eyebrows and her voice in equal measure. “I want to dance, Brent. I want to dance, now. Get your ass up and head to the dance floor.”

Lexi watched them go.

Brent looked like a scolded puppy and Ashley was shaking her head.

Embarrassment crept in as Lexi peeked at Morgan from the corner of her eye. “They’re not exactly subtle.”

He chuckled. “No. Ashley wouldn’t know what subtle was if it bit her on the ass and Brent...well, he’s a good guy, but he doesn’t do subtext.”

“My sister has this crazy idea that you’re interested in me. I told her that she’s being—”

“Why would you think that’s a crazy idea?”

Lexi blushed. “Well, I mean—it’s just...There’s no way to explain it that sounds good.”

“You’re wrong...not about the explanation part, but about the
it being a crazy idea
part.”

She knew she was blinking at him like a damn guppy, but she couldn’t stop. “It isn’t?”

He gazed right at her then, and Lexi felt her heart stuttering in her chest. It was those damned green eyes. She couldn’t breathe. Literally, could not take a breath as he stared at her so intently. Then his gaze dropped lower, and the weight of it on her lips felt just like a caress.

The moment seemed to go on forever. Lexi could feel herself swaying toward him, until bad luck intervened. A sloppy drunk headed from the bar to the bathroom, bumped into the corner of the booth, sloshing beer from his overly full mug all over her shoulders. The cold liquid was a shock to the system, and effectively killed whatever moment happening between them.

“Sorry ‘bout that!” The drunk slurred, but his eyes were glued to the rivulets of beer now slipping into the deep V between her breasts. “Let me clean that up for you.”

Lexi cringed at the none too steady hand that was reaching for her, but it never made contact.

Morgan caught the other man’s wrist, his grip firm and unyielding. “She doesn’t need your help.”

Not so drunk that his sense of self preservation was impaired, the intoxicated man shrugged, muttered under his breath and wandered on toward the bathrooms.

Heaving a sigh of relief, which only allowed the beer to seep deeper into her bra, Lexi wanted to go home. “I think I should head home and get cleaned up.”

“I’ll walk you to your car,” Morgan offered.

Lexi shook her head. “I didn’t drive. I rode with Ashley.”

“I’ll take you home, then. No point in dragging her away from the dance floor.”

“Thank you.”

~*~*~

Morgan rose from the booth, watching Lexi slide across the seat with parts of her jiggling that made him want to bang his head against the wall. He’d been so close to kissing her, so close to doing something completely stupid.

He would take her home and not touch her, or kiss her
and
he would not think about stripping her out of those beer soaked clothes. In fact, thinking of her taking off any clothes was a bad plan. For his peace of mind, even in his imagination, she needed to be fully clothed at all times.

Ashley strolled up to them then, Brent in her wake. “Leaving so soon?”

“Walter Collins spilled his beer all over me. I reek.”

Ashley raised an eyebrow at Morgan. “Can I trust you with my baby sister?”

Morgan rolled his eyes. Not half an hour earlier, she’d been trying to get him to hit on her sister. “I’m giving Lexi a ride to make sure she gets home safely. You guys have a good night.”

Outside, Morgan opened the truck door for her and allowed her to climb in. The smell of cheap beer wasn’t as pleasant as the scent of vanilla he’d come to associate with her, but it wasn’t doing anything to alleviate the chronic erection her presence seemed to evoke.

Walking around to his own side of the vehicle, he adjusted the fly of his pants to avoid permanent damage before climbing behind the wheel.
Just get her home, Morgan, and don’t be a dumbass
.

Climbing up into the cab, he turned the key, allowing the truck to rattle to life. It was old and beat up, a lot like him, he thought. A country song blared from the radio and he adjusted the volume to a more reasonable level before easing out of the parking space and toward town.

“Thank you for driving me home. I know it’s out of your way.”

Morgan shrugged. “It’s no trouble.”

“And thank you for being nice about my sister and her general insanity.”

That prompted a chuckle from him. Ashley hadn’t changed much. She was still a force to be reckoned with, barreling ahead with reckless abandon. That trait seemed to have missed Lexi, but considering what Ashley said before, he could see some of the same stubbornness in her. She simply covered it with a smile, instead of a raised chin and challenging glare. “Ashley’s always been—well, there’s no way to say it that doesn’t sound like an insult.”

She laughed at that and he was reminded again, of the sound of tinkling bells. Jesus. He
was
losing his mind.

“I know. When you put Ashley into words it always sounds bad, but the reality of her is very different.”

They chatted about inane things during the short drive. She updated him on local gossip and prompted more laughter and smiles from him than anyone had in a very long time. The tension from their near kiss was still there, hovering between them.

When he eased the truck into a parking space in front of the shop, she turned toward him. “Thank you again.”

Morgan gazed at her, but then realized just how dangerous that could be. Turning his head back toward the street, he nodded. “You’re welcome. Good night.”

He felt her moving, unfastening her seat belt. Then—she leaned across the distance between them and kissed his cheek. It took every ounce of willpower he possessed not to turn his head and claim her lips then. Her breasts pressed against his arm and the silky fall of her hair brushed his neck. His cock went so hard it was painful.

“Good night, Morgan.” Her voice came out as barely a whisper while she moved to open the door.

Morgan reached out, grasping her wrist. “Lexi—” He had no idea what to say, he just knew that he didn't want her to leave.

She turned back to him, glancing over her bare shoulder at him. It wasn't intended to be sultry. That wasn't her style. Her sexiness was innate, subconscious and packed a powerful punch. Tugging her back and across the seat, he closed his arms around her. Morgan pressed his lips to hers, swallowing the soft sigh that escaped her.

It’d been so achingly long since he'd kissed a woman, and never had he kissed a woman he desired like Lexi. She'd crept in, past his defenses, into his dreams and his waking fantasies. He was a forty year old man with a chronic erection and it could be laid entirely at her doorstep.

The softness of her body against him coupled with her sweetly, pliant lips only intensified the raging erection he'd been sporting since she'd first walked into the bar. Sliding his tongue between her parted lips, he tasted her, learning the curves and contours of her mouth. Unable to resist the lure of her breasts, he brushed his thumb over a lush curve. When she arched her chest into his touch, pressing her breast to his hand, he didn't hesitate to eagerly take what she offered.

Through the fabric of her top and bra beneath, he could feel the hardened pebble of her nipple. Kissing her deeply, he swept his thumb in tight circles around that hardened nub, savoring the feel of her supple flesh beneath his palm.

He wanted her in a bed, writhing beneath him. He wanted her naked, so he could lick every inch of her. Moving his hand from her breast, he slid it over the curve of her belly until he could move between her parted thighs. The heat of her was scorching, even through her clothes.

She broke the kiss, gasping for breath, “Are we really going to do this here?”

He smiled. “Do you have a better idea?”

“Come upstairs with me,” she urged. “I want to be naked with you.”

It would be a horrible mistake. She'd take one look at him and it would change everything. The last thing he wanted was to be a pity fuck. Pulling back, he shook his head. “No. This—this can't happen, Lexi. I'm sorry.”

~*~*~

Lexi stared at him blankly for a moment. He'd hauled her back into the truck, splayed her backwards over his thighs and kissed her until she couldn't see straight. Now he was telling her it was a bad idea. “I don't understand.”

“It's just not a good idea. I wouldn't be good for you—when it comes to relationships, I'm not a good bet.”

Cocking her head to one side, Lexi tried to process the cool tone in his voice with the hot, drugging kisses of moments earlier. “I don't recall asking you for a relationship. I asked you to come upstairs because I wanted you, and I assumed that you wanted me to. But maybe I was wrong about that.”

“It would be a mistake. I'm just—you don't want to get tangled up with me.”

The finality of his tone was difficult to take. The fact that he kept his gaze averted from her made it even more so. It dawned on her then that maybe he hadn't really wanted her at all. She'd simply been convenient. But even convenience wasn't enough to make him look past her size.

“It already is a mistake, and for the record the
it's not you it's me
bit is already played out.” She didn't cry, though she wanted to. It felt like high school all over again with cruel pranks about popular boys who would never really be interested in her. Reaching for the door handle, she climbed out of the truck and this time, he made no move to stop her.

She made it up the stairs and into her apartment, but even then she refused to cry. Stalking toward her bedroom, she kicked off her heels and stripped out of her beer soaked clothes. Donning a comfortable tank top and pajama shorts, she then climbed into bed, willing the tears away.

~*~*~

Morgan sat in his truck for the longest time, watching lights come on in Lexi's apartment and then watching them go dark again. He regretted his decision and regretted he'd hurt her with it. But he wasn't a good fit for her and eventually she would realize it too. Too old, too broken and too set in his ways, Morgan didn't feel like a good fit for anyone.

Knowing that he was doing the right thing for them both did nothing to ease the ache of wanting her. Muttering a curse, he started the engine and drove toward home and another sleepless night in a lonely bed.

CHAPTER THREE

“W
hat do you mean he just left?”

Ashley's shrill tone was making Lexi's head hurt. It was probably stress, and her high strung sister wasn’t helping with that. Holding the phone away from her ear, she waited for the litany of curses to peter out.

When Ashley finished screeching, Lexi explained it as dispassionately as possible, “He said it was a mistake, that he wasn't looking for a relationship and then he left.” It stung. She tried to tell herself it wasn't her looks, or specifically her weight, but that ugly voice in the back of her mind kept insisting otherwise.

“So, he left the bar practically salivating after you...you all make out like horny teenagers on prom night in the front seat of his truck...then he bails?”

Lexi held the cell to her ear, unlocked the door to the shop and stepped into the darkened kitchen. The shop wasn't open, but she was expecting a delivery and they didn't really factor in her desire to have Mondays off. “That sums it up.”

“Why didn't you call me yesterday?”

Spending the day in bed with a pint of Ben & Jerry's and a Lifetime movie marathon had seemed a better option. Plus, she'd wanted to stave off owning up to the humiliation of rejection for a day longer. She didn't say this out loud though. It would have sent Ashley through the roof. “Look, it's not a big deal. I'm just not his cup of tea. It happens.”

“Next time I see him, I'm giving him a piece of my mind!”

Lexi groaned…exactly what she'd been afraid of. When Ashley went into protective big sister mode it invariably made things worse. “Please, don't. I don't need you fixing this for me. It's not the first time in my life I've been rejected by a man, and it probably won't be the last. This does not require you shifting into rescue mode.”

“I'm not going into rescue mode,” she denied hotly. “I'm going into kickass mode!”

“No!” Lexi's denial rang firm. “It's humiliating enough without him thinking I went crying to you!”

“I don't like it,” Ashley grumbled, “But I won't embarrass you further.”

Lexi breathed a sigh of relief. “I have to go. I need to get things organized before the truck comes in.”

“There's a guy out there for you, Lexi. One who will think you're perfect just as you are.”

The tears she'd been fighting ever since Morgan had all but shoved her out of his truck came then. She blinked furiously, willing them away, but a few escaped anyway. “I love you, Ash. Now, I'm getting to work.”

~*~*~

Morgan stood in the workshop carefully measuring and cutting the trim pieces for Lexi's kitchen. His decision from the other night still gnawed at him, and so did his lust. He knew she was probably unaware of the fact that after she’d left his truck, he sat outside for a long while, watching her window, regretting his decision.

Biting back a curse, he fed the wood through the router, creating a perfect edge. He'd just finished, allowing the saw to go quiet, when he heard the slamming of a door. Looking up, he saw Ashley stalking toward him, looking mad enough to chew glass. “Fuck.”

His uncle, Jess, had been sitting quietly on the other side of the work shop, sanding and polishing some of the more ornate pieces of wood. He took one look at Ashley and rose, heading for the house. “You're on your own with that one, son.”

Morgan braced himself. He didn't know what the hell was going on, but he knew that look. Putting down the pieces of wood that he'd been working on, he took off his safety glasses and waited.

“You fucking asshole!”

His only response was a sigh. “Probably. What have I done, now?”

She picked up a block of wood and chucked it at him.

Luckily for him, Ashley's aim had always been terrible. He ducked to one side, ignoring the protesting muscles in his leg. “Goddamit, Ashley. Stop throwing things!”

“If you didn't want to go out with her, fine! But don't look at her like she's the hottest thing that ever walked and then reject her!”

“You don't know what's going on here and it's best if you just stay out of it.” He kept his tone cool when he spoke. It hadn't escaped him that he owed Lexi an apology and an explanation, but he just hadn't worked his way around to how do it yet. Having Ashley butting into the mix, probably wouldn’t help. “I didn't reject her.”

She all but bared her teeth at him. “You did. You took her home and then you told her you weren't interested in her and dumped her out in front of the shop and left.”

Morgan cursed under his breath. “I never said I wasn't interested in her. I said it would be a mistake for her to get involved with me and that's the truth!”

“Why? Give me one good reason why? You're single, she's single and you're not getting any damn younger!”

“It's none of your damn business!”

Ashley stamped her foot then. Literally stamped her foot like a child mid-tantrum. “The hell it isn't. She's my sister! Did you decide suddenly that she was too fat for you? Did you get embarrassed because she's not a size two?”

This sparked Morgan's own temper. “Don't say another word like that about her.”

“Like what? You think you're the first guy to look at her and get blinded by those big brown eyes and giant tits, only to have second thoughts?”

“Goddamit, Ashley, don't say another word!”

“I'm not the one she needs protecting from, Morgan! You're the one who hurt her! Because what I'm saying right now...that's what she's thinking. You did that. You!”

He ran his hands over his face in a gesture of frustration as old as time. “It had nothing to do with that. Lexi is gorgeous.”

She planted her hands on her hips. “Then tell me why? Why would you run out on her when you're obviously crazy about her?”

He threw his safety goggles, the plastic cracking against the pavement. “Because I'm too fucking old for her, because I have violent nightmares where I relive watching my friends getting blown up, because my leg is more metal than bone and some days it hurts so fucking bad I can't get out of bed... Because I've spent more time killing people than I have living with them. I'm so covered in scars that when I take my clothes off—I don't even recognize myself. What the hell do I have to offer her?”

Ashley halted then, her eyes widening and her jaw dropping. “Oh, Morgan.”

The pity in her voice made him angrier. “I don't need you feeling sorry for me...and I sure as hell don't want Lexi feeling sorry for me.”

“I don't feel sorry for you—I'm sorry you got hurt, and I don't mean just physically. But right now, I just think you're a dumbass.”

“What?”

Ashley leaned against the work table and looked at him much the way someone would look at a dog that was too stupid to be taught tricks. “Do you think she cares about your scars? Nightmares eventually fade Morgan...Lexi has plenty of her own. Did you know that when she was thirteen she had to move in with Brent and me because our stepfather got a little too friendly? Or that when she was in high school she was the butt of so many jokes and vicious pranks that she would get physically sick before going to school?”

“Where's your stepfather?”

“You don't need to kill him. He died of a heart attack outside a strip club in Nashville...The point is, you're not the only one who has a past and has demons. And right now, Lexi's demons aren't telling her that you've got issues. They're telling her you didn't find her attractive for the same reason those vicious fucks in high school didn't...because she's the fat girl.”

“That's not it. That's not it at all. She's perfect.”

“Then tell her. Go tell her that, and stop being a fucking martyr and making you both miserable...It's better to regret a relationship not working than to regret it never starting.” With that parting shot, Ashley rose to her full but still diminutive height and sauntered off.

Morgan watched her go, her words ringing in his head. It had never occurred to him that Lexi would ever believe his retreat had been about anything but him. “God, I'm an asshole.”

“You got that right, son.”

Morgan glanced up to see Jess standing in the doorway. “You want to take your pound of flesh, too?”

Jess shook his head sadly, before pushing his cap back on his head. “First off, you're an idiot. I love you. Couldn't love you anymore if you were my own son...but there's not a woman alive who doesn't think it's about her looks when a man leaves her or turns her down. I reckon you get a pass on that, being as how you haven't been around 'em that much the last twenty years.”

“There were women in the military.”

“No. There were soldiers who happened to be female. Doesn't matter if you're male or female, the military changes how you look at things. Realigns your priorities...They did it to me before Vietnam, and they did it to you. Sometimes, it takes a while to get your thinking right when you're amongst civilians again. Sometimes, it never gets right, and you can't afford to wait around for that. Go buy that girl some flowers and convince her to make babies with you.”

“Do you think I can take her on a date before we decide that?”

Jess laughed. “You can try.

CHAPTER FOUR

L
exi stared at the crates of supplies and shook her head. The new deliveryman had simply wheeled all the stuff in and dumped it in the middle of her kitchen. Lugging fifty pound tubs of flour and sugar wasn’t how she’d planned to spend her morning. With a sigh, she opened the door to the small closet that was her pantry and pulled out the hand truck. It would help somewhat.

Normally, work didn't bother her. She loved her shop, but her mood and her bruised ego were making enthusiasm hard to muster. She’d just shifted the first load from the kitchen to the narrow pantry when she heard the door open. Struggling to hoist one of the tubs onto the metal shelving, she called out that she’d be just a minute.

“What the hell are you doing?”

The weight of the tub was instantly gone, a pair of strong arms coming around her and shoving it onto the shelf with apparent ease. Turning, she found herself staring into Morgan Donnelly’s green eyes, their faces only inches apart. Not for the first time, she wished she were taller, but the impetus for that now wasn't the desire to be closer to his too-perfect lips framed so beautifully by dark stubble, but because having to look up at him only pissed her off more.

All the reasons for feeling angry came flooding back into her mind. Stepping back, she leveled a cool stare at him, one eyebrow cocked and her best bitch face on. “Not that it's any of your business, but the new delivery man screwed up.” Her voice sounded a little breathless and shaky even to her own ears and only part of that had to do with exertion. He was responsible for a good bit of it.

“I’ll help you with the rest of us this, but you need to call the supplier and complain.”

Lexi pasted a sweet saccharine smile on her face. “Thank you so much for telling me how to run my business. Any other words of wisdom you’d like to impart right now?”

His jaw firmed, his eyes flashing. “I'm not telling you how to run your business. I'm just going on what I know about you..You're too damn nice for your own good.”

“Fat chicks have to cultivate a pleasing personality,” she shot back bitterly.

His lips firmed. “Lexi, don't say things like that.”

“It's true. I'm fat. It didn't escape my notice—and I don't even care anymore. I could starve myself and I'll never be thin. What really bugs me is that for a split second, I allowed myself to believe it didn't matter to you either.”

Morgan didn't respond, just stared at her for a moment, his jaw firmed and his lips pressed into a hard line.

Lexi wished she could call back the words. Admitting that to him had been a moment of weakness and her pride was already hurting for it.

The back door to the shop opened and the deliveryman called out. “I’m leaving the invoice by the door!”

Fear prompted her to move. Lexi dove past him for the pantry door, but it was too late. The vacuum created by the closing of the back door caused the pantry door to slam shut, and the broken doorknob on the inside left them completely trapped. “Oh, hell...I don’t suppose you have a screwdriver with you?”

“In my truck. Outside. Where it does not a damn bit of a good.”

Lexi gazed back at him. He didn’t look angry, but there was a tight note in his voice that left her puzzled. Of course, they were hardly on the best of terms and were now locked in a small room, four feet by eight feet. That was enough to make some people nervous. He'd also made it abundantly clear that he wanted to keep his distance from her. Pulling her phone from her pocket, she sighed. “I’ll text Ashley. She can come over and let us out...if I can get a signal.”

Holding the phone up, she managed to get one bar. Hoping it would be enough, she quickly tapped in the message and hit send. “For what it's worth, I'm sorry you're stuck in here with me. You've made it abundantly clear that you'd rather be anywhere else.”

“Goddamit, Lexi. It's not like that!”

“Well, you could have fooled me,” she shot back.

With tempers flaring and trapped in such close quarters, it was impossible not to touch. She could feel his body heat and she could smell him. A hint of cologne, wood and just him—it was an intoxicating combination.