The Seventh Tide (17 page)

TakK approached them and spoke to Eo: ‘Ask the god to give us a little while to go ahead and announce his coming to our people.’

‘A breather – great!’ panted Jay.

‘You may tell him we will wait here for his return,’ Hurple intoned pompously.

‘Yeah, right,’ grunted Eo. But he passed on the message anyway, and the hunting party loped off again, into the trees and out of sight.

‘This divinity business is really getting up my nose, you know that?’ grumbled Eo. ‘I can’t believe we’re wasting our time on this bunch – what on earth can
they
give us that’ll help? They must be even stupider than they look if they think
you’re
a god!’

There was a taut silence. Hurple climbed stiffly down on to the ground and stalked away from him.

Eo kicked at a stone and hunched his shoulders in the cold air. He pulled back one sleeve to scratch and saw the sores were still there.

‘Not even being dead gets rid of those!’ he snarled angrily, and covered them up again.

It was a moment before he noticed nobody else was talking. He looked round to see the others all staring at him.

‘Well?’ he grunted. ‘What’s the matter with you?’

Jay squared up to him aggressively. ‘That’s just what I’d like to ask
you!
’ she said, hands on hips. ‘What’s the matter with
you
? Ever since you died you’ve been a real pain. Well, no, I guess I mean ever since you
stopped
being dead. You weren’t too bad when you were, you know,
actually
dead.’

Eo glared at her for a long moment, and then suddenly seemed to go all boneless. He slumped to the ground and wrapped his arms round his knees. He buried his head and started muttering.

‘What…? We can’t hear you,’ said Adom.

‘It’s not my fault!’ he lifted his head and wailed. ‘It’s
not
And anyway – isn’t being shot enough? Can’t that be enough? Professor?’

‘That’s not how it works, boy’ said Hurple gently. ‘You know that.’

‘Tell us what’s got to you, Eo,’ urged Jay.

‘What’s
got
to me?! Do you know what Tide this is? Do you?’ Eo croaked at her. He couldn’t have looked more tragic.

‘Yeah, urn…’Jay frowned. ‘It’s –’

‘It’s the
fourth
! The Fourth Tide! That’s four out of six, and no flipping miracle yet – not that I’ve noticed.
But hey I might have missed something, on account of being dead for a while. But I didn’t, did I? Four out of six and who’s shown up to fix this mess? A couple of kids, a useless bit of ammunition, and now what? – We’re trapped with a bunch of pea-brained Stone Age morons who are going to help us how? Lend us some pointy sticks?’

Actually, Neanderthals had, on average,
larger
brains than a modern human’s…’ Hurple began.

And
then
you tell me they’re all just going to
die.
They’re a
dead end.
So now I have to be upset about
them.
too. And what if they’re a dead end because of one person, like maybe that’s what’s happening to the G, and I’m the one person, and it IS my fault, and then I got sent to find help and I didn’t even do
that
right…’ He looked round, a stricken expression on his face. And now I’ve insulted you all and you should just walk away and leave me to die
properly
!’

‘That’s just stupid talk,’ said Adom in a firm, authoritative voice. ‘Dead man talk.’

There was a new confidence in his voice. Everyone turned and stared at him. Adom stared right back.

‘Well, he was
dead
! he said. ‘That’s not a
little
experience. Why should he just bounce straight back from that? He won’t – not without help.’ He spoke directly to Eo. ‘We’re going to surprise you, Eo. We’re probably going to surprise ourselves at the same time. We’re the
perfect
combination for a job like this – we’ve got a crazy shape-shifter who can’t shift shapes – a
genius
not-quite-novice who’s too thick to read – and a bald woman technical expert who’s so far managed to break pretty much every bit of technology she’s brought
with her. And that’s not even
mentioning
the services of a god. There is no possible fashion in which we
cannot
succeed…

‘Trust me – I’m practically a monk!’

‘
‘Never trust anybody who starts a sentence with “Trust me”F
Hurple and Jay chorused. And for the first time in far too long, Eo gave the beginnings of a proper smile.

Adom shoved Jay with his shoulder. ‘Your turn,’ he whispered.

All right – all right!’ She stuck out her tongue at him and then stepped forward, as if about to make a speech. ‘Eo. When you were, you know, dead, back there in the other place, the weasel told us some stories about you.’

‘What?!’ Eo screwed up his face. It was obvious he wasn’t too sure he liked the idea.

‘Yeah. It was a bit like a wake, you know?’Jay started to sound defensive. ‘What did you
want
us to do – put you on hold for an entire Tide? Just ignore you?
There’s Eo – he’s dead. Oh, really? Shame. What’s for tea
?’

Eo wriggled his shoulders. ‘No, I guess not. Not when you put it like that… So what did the Professor tell you about me, then?’

‘He told us plenty of daft stuff, and stuff that was downright cute. And I took notes on some of the stunts you pulled to get out of doing homework! But there’s one thing I think you really need to know, that Professor Weasel said about you.’ She took a breath. ‘He said you were probably the most G person he’d ever met. And when he said that, he stopped, as if there was nothing more that anybody needed to say.’

There was a moment of stunned silence. Eo stared at
her. ‘Really?’ he said in a hushed voice. ‘He really did?’ He turned to Hurple. ‘You really did!?’

‘Don’t let it go to your head,’ the ferret humphed. He looked embarrassed, a look that deepened when Eo picked him up and kissed him.

Adom leaned closer to Jay. ‘
The most G person –
what does that actually mean?’ he whispered.

‘
I
don’t know,’ she whispered back, ‘and you don’t know, but what matters is that it means something to
him.
’

‘Yes… I think you’re right,’ Adom nodded solemnly. Then he gave her a big smile. ‘I think we’re getting him back from the dead at last.’

When TakK returned, he was accompanied by a number of old men who, in spite of being obviously ancient, still travelled over the rough ground like athletic mountain goats.

‘Tribal elders,’ murmured Hurple. ‘They’ll be coming to honour
me
, of course.’

There was indeed a lot of bowing going on once they got closer. Then the god’s party was led on up the valley and into the trees. Not much further on, however, the Neanderthals turned off into a side-gully After a short, steep scramble they came to a level forecourt, and there, leading into the heart of the hillside, was the entrance to a cave.

They had come out of the wind, which helped a little, and into a solid wall of stink, which didn’t.

‘Peughh – what
is
that?!’ gasped Jay.

‘Don’t
you
start being rude now,’ Hurple scolded out of the corner of his mouth. Just be grateful it’s not summertime!’

Jay turned to him angrily. ‘We’re standing here freezing to death and you say be grateful?! Surely even in an Ice Age it must get a
bit
warmer in summer?’

‘True. Quite a bit warmer… and quite a
lot
smellier. Use your imagination!’

They stepped closer and looked inside. Cave-proud would not be the first word you’d use to describe the tribe. There were piles of rubbish scattered about – discarded shells, cracked bones, other things that you wouldn’t want to peer at too closely. In a time without weekly rubbish collections, a quick flick over your shoulder was the accepted technique.

And then there was the tribe itself – the cave was a large high space, full of Neanderthal men, women, babies and children.

Ferrets are not known as odourless beings, but TakK and his people could certainly give them a run for their money. It was partly the lack of personal hygiene routines and partly the animal skins they were wearing.

Still, none of their visitors said no when offered cloaks of some sort of deerskin. Even Jay wrapped herself up tight and just took shallow breaths. In fact, in a surprisingly short length of time she found she wasn’t really
noticing
the smell any more
and
she was starting to warm up. The skin was an excellent insulator.

There was another of the pauses that marked their interactions with TakK’s people. The Neanderthal men muttered together, and the women and children carefully didn’t stare at the strange beings standing around awkwardly in their doorway.

‘It looks like we have a minute here,’ said Hurple briskly. ‘Eo, get my things out of your bag. So much has
happened, I really must make some notes, and there just haven’t been a lot of peaceful moments…’

Eo got the bundle of papers out of his bag, where it had lain forgotten for so many hours, and put it down on a conveniently flat rock. The Professor immediately started pushing the pages about with his nose and chittering at them.

Adom’s eyes practically popped out. He drew Eo aside. ‘What in heaven’s name is he
doing
?’ he exclaimed.

‘What – oh, that’s his manuscript,’ said Eo. ‘It goes everywhere with him. I’d been carrying it around for him for weeks before all this started, in case he suddenly got an inspiration in the middle of a lesson.’ He noticed the blank expression. ‘He’s writing a book.’

Adom frowned. ‘Don’t be ridiculous. He doesn’t have hands!’

Ah, but who says you need hands to write a book?’ Eo wandered back to Hurple, looking irritatingly smug.

Adom scowled after him.

‘What’s up?’ said Jay, who had missed their exchange. ‘I thought we’d brought him back to the Land of Cheerful?’

‘Oh, he’s cheerful all right, the lying Know-All,’ grunted Adom. ‘Telling me the beast can
write.
’ Brother Drostlin’s voice suddenly forced its way into his head.
A
beast
could write better than that
! The words tasted as bitter as the first time he’d heard them said.

Animals can’t write,’ saidjay confidently. ‘No opposable thumb – therefore can’t hold a pen – therefore can’t write. Don’t worry about it – he’s having you on.’

‘Of course he is. The rotten little…’

‘Right,’ said Jay with half a smile. ‘Look, I know I was whingeing to have a roof over my head again, but now I think the price is too high, and so are these Neanderthals. I’m heading outside for a bit of fresh air. Want to come?’

‘Yes.’ Adom nodded his head vigorously. ‘Yes, please!’

It wasn’t long before Hurple had finished his note-taking and turned his eye to the meeting of elders. He gave a fake yawn and muttered to Eo out of the corner of his mouth, ‘I’m going to pretend to go to sleep now – if I go to that rock over there, I’m pretty sure I can listen in on the old boys – see if they’re talking about anything that might be of help to us.’

‘Do divine beings eavesdrop?’ Eo whispered back.

‘What would you know – you’re just a slave,’ muttered Hurple. ‘And I’m ordering you to go and make some friends. Remember, so far what we’ve been given has been pretty unexpected. No reason to think it’ll be different this time!’

A ferret can move fast when he wants to. In under a blink, the Professor was across the floor and curled up on a stone at convenient eavesdropping distance from the meeting of men.

Eo grinned to himself, and then looked about for somebody to talk to. He noticed a boy sitting by himself in the entrance and decided to go over and say hello.

The boy had his back to the cave, presumably to get the best light for the thing he was bent over. It looked like a leg bone of some sort of animal.

‘What’s that you’re making?’ asked Eo politely.

The boy jumped and thrust the bone behind his back.
He was a good bit younger than Eo, though it wasn’t that easy to tell.

These faces are impossible to read
, thought Eo to himself, and then the boy smiled, and he changed his mind.

‘It’s a flute,’ the boy said. ‘Don’t tell.’

Eo hunkered down beside him. ‘I won’t tell.’ He poked a finger at the bone. ‘Aren’t you supposed to, um, make flutes?’

The boy shook his head, and glanced over his shoulder. ‘This is bear,’ he said, as if that explained it.

It didn’t.

‘Bear bone is not a good thing for flutes?’ Eo said tentatively.

‘No – bear is
wonderful
for flutes. The notes are beautiful, pure… wonderful! Just not wonderful for
us
to make flutes out of He looked at Eo, as if waiting for understanding to dawn. He was out of luck. ‘My name is MakK. So it’s not going to be
bear
bones my tribe makes flutes out of, is it?’

‘My name’s Eo. And I’m really not getting this,’ Eo admitted.

It was MakK’s turn to look puzzled.

‘Your name is EoO?’ he said. ‘What tribe is “O”?’ He made it sound like a grunt, rather than a letter.

‘I’m not an “O” – I’m a G, though that’s not a tribe, really…’

‘ “G”? What animal…?’

‘No, the G aren’t animals – I mean, they
can
be, but… Anyway, I’m still too young to, um, be an animal…’

Mutual confusions were piling up on each other by the minute. Eo tried again.

‘What tribe did you say you belong to, MakK?’ he asked.

‘You just said it! kK! We are the Tribe of Deer.’