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Authors: Pamela Sargent

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BOOK: The Shore of Women
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“I am Arvil. The one with me is called Spellweaver, for he knows something of the powers of the mind. I would ask you a few questions.”

“That is why I am here, to answer them.”

“I would have you speak more slowly,” I said, “for even the holy speech sounds strange to me in your mouth. How many men and boys are in your band?”

Tulan put out his hands once, then twice, then yet again until he had thrust his fingers at me eleven times. “It is a great band,” I murmured.

“It is, and we have a truce with other lake bands with as many men.”

“You have much, but I see that you can guard it against others who would seek it.”

“That is so,” he responded, “and each of the lake bands is bound to protect the others and to fight with them if one band is attacked.”

So this part of Ilf’s story was true. I longed to ask the boy about the holy vision and what it might mean, but held myself back.

“I am to tell you,” Tulan continued, “to stay here until it’s time for others to speak with you. If you must relieve yourselves, go to that place.” He pointed at a ditch shielded by several shrubs. “I’ll bring you food. Others will not speak with you until we have learned more about you.” He leaned forward. “Had you come on foot, we might have welcomed you more readily, but we have heard tales of those who have tamed the horse.”

“Some of those tales are not truthful.”

“Do others follow you?”

“No one will follow,” I admitted.

He seemed relieved to hear that. “I’ll tell you some of our lore.” I supposed that he was happy to have new ears for his talk.

He went on to tell us a story of long ago, when members of this band had first come to the lake. The Lady, in the form of a doe, had led them there, and because they had been a band that had not hunted does with young, but only bucks and other deer that had grown old, they had been rewarded with the bounty of the lake. In the form of a bear, the Lady had shown them the abundance of fish that lived in the waters and had taught them to make nets and boats. As a goose, She had led them to flocks of birds that came to the lake during their migrations. As a wren, She had shown them the plants that grew on the land, and a holy vision had revealed that certain plants could be cultivated and not simply gathered.

Other visions had shown them new arts, and they had prospered. They had also learned that truces with other bands around the lake would strengthen rather than weaken them. Although they lived very far from the Lady’s enclave and had to travel for days even to reach a shrine, they honored the Lady in all that they did. They often journeyed to a distant shrine in groups, and men of their number were called often enough to bring new boys to the band, while others had joined them after traveling to the lake from other regions. This last statement eased my mind a little.

I looked past him, seeing that a few men had entered the clearing; they carried a large deer hanging from a pole over their shoulders. Tulan turned his head toward them. “The hunters are back,” he said.

“Are you not all hunters?” I asked.

He shook his head. “When we are boys, the men see who is best at hunting or tending plants or fishing or toolmaking.” He struck his chest. “I am one who will hunt. Those who are weaker must tend plants. Those whose hands are skillful craft tools, but it is from the hunters that our Headman is chosen.”

“You are all one band,” I said. “Can one be more or less than another in a band?”

Tulan lifted his head. “Do you not have a Headman, and isn’t he higher than all?”

“Even a Headman must listen to his men and heed their words before he acts.”

The boy smiled. “Our Headman heeds his own voice and listens only to those around him who have proven their strength, and others must follow. He does not hunt or fish or tend plants or make tools or baskets or pots unless he wishes to do so, for it is his task to watch others and to guide us all. When he grows older, he must choose another Headman.”

I thought of Geab. “What if he doesn’t want to give it up?”

Tulan gaped at me. “But he must. He knows when it is time. When our Prayergiver dies, the Headman must become the Prayergiver and choose a new Headman. He then lives in the small hut apart from our other dwellings, and there he prays to the Lady throughout the days until his soul leaves us. He leaves our camp no more, and we honor his holiness, for his prayers protect us.”

I considered all he had told me. The men on the plateau had trained some of their number to fight with spears, others with bows, but all had labored together at other tasks, according to Bint. The customs of this lake band were much stranger and seemed contrary to all I knew of what a man’s life should be. Wanderer had heard of places where men tilled the soil, yet even he had not come upon so strange a band.

The men in the clearing were butchering the deer. Another man left one of the dwellings, and my mouth dropped open as I watched him gesture to the others. He was the largest man I had ever seen. His belly was swollen under his leather garments while his arms seemed thicker than my thighs. I waved an arm at him. “Is that giant your Headman?” I asked.

Tulan turned. “He is. You see our greatness in how well we have kept him fed.” He stood up. “You’ll hear more in time, and we will learn of you when the time for truthsaying comes.” He picked up his sack and left us.

I looked inside the basket he had given us and found pokeweed, ripe strawberries, and asparagus. We ate this with the dried fish and then fed our horses, who ate readily of the grain. After we had drunk and filled our waterskins at the lake, we sat down under the shelter. From the camp, I could hear the voices of the men speaking in their own tongue as they entered their dwellings.

I stripped the red skin from the pokeweed that remained, chewed on the leaves, then divided the berries we had left. Birana shook her head as I offered one to her. “I’m full.”

“I cannot eat them all.”

She accepted a few. I looked down at her belly, hidden by her coat. “You grow rounder with more food, Birana. Your chest grows fuller and your hips more curved.”

She narrowed her eyes and drew back a little. “I know,” she whispered, although there was no one near enough to hear us. “If we stay here, they’ll see what I am.”

I rested my head against my knees. “We cannot escape.”

“We should never have come here.”

I felt the burden of her then. “We are here because you seek a refuge, because you thought others of your kind might have found this land. I see none of them here, but this place can be a refuge for you. If you show these men your true nature, they would honor you and serve you, and your life would be an easy one, as would mine.”

“I would be betrayed the next time one of them went to a shrine. I can’t teach them all…”

“You told my old band that they didn’t have to travel to shrines while you were among them. Can’t you tell these men the same?” I was warm with anger at her. Here was a camp where she could be safe, where I might find new friends, yet she still dreamed of a refuge that might not be. I wanted to break her hold on me then, to tell her I would travel no more.

“The boy said nothing of seeing one of us,” she said.

“Perhaps his band does not speak of such things in front of strangers.” I could still hope.

I stretched out under the shelter. Birana lay at my side, her arm by mine, seeking nearness to me instead of only enduring it. I clasped her hand tightly and felt her hair against my lips.

We stayed by the lake, and Tulan brought us another small basket of food. Although men passed by us on the way to their boats, they did not answer any of my greetings. We tended the horses but did not ride, and my idleness soon grew wearisome.

On the next day, when Tulan came, I motioned to him to sit, then went to the horses and fetched what remained of our meat. I carried it to the boy and put it into his sack, keeping only enough to eat later. “You have given to me and to Spellweaver,” I said as I sat down. “So I shall give to you. This is most of the meat we have, and you are welcome to it. Share it with others. I am sorry there is no more.”

Tulan grinned. “I told them you were a good man,” he burst out. “My band will be happy you did this now.” I saw then that I had passed some sort of testing.

“I must ask you to do something for us, Tulan. I want to speak to one of your men, your Headman or another who is respected among you.”

He rose. “I will fetch Jerlan, my guardian. He’s one of our best hunters and a man to whom even the Headman sometimes listens.”

He scurried off as Birana shot me a glance. “What are you going to do now?”

“You will see,” I answered.

Tulan returned quickly with a tall, black-haired man, the one who had guided us to the camp and given us back our weapons. We greeted each other, and then I said, “It is not right for us to take from you while giving nothing. I must take up the tasks of a man if I am to stay with you.”

“And do you wish to stay?”

“If your band will allow it. Our band is dead. We have no band. We traveled far to reach this place.”

Jerlan’s dark eyes seemed kind, but I saw that he was also a man who would not listen to foolish or false words. I told him a little of our travels and how far we had come, and he grew more attentive to my words as I talked. I said that I had heard that the men of the lake lived in holiness and treated strangers kindly.

He nodded at this. “We are kind to those who, when the time for truthsaying comes, show that they are worthy men. To others we are not so kind.” He was silent for a moment while I wondered what he meant by the time for truthsaying. “What do you offer us besides the meat you have already given?”

I glanced at Birana. “Spellweaver is not strong,” I said carefully, “but my band kept him for his skill with horses and because he has a brave heart. He can teach some of you how to ride if you don’t fear our beasts too much, and perhaps he can learn the art of plant tending from you.” She looked away as I spoke. “I can hunt and gather wild plants. I can make tools and weapons.” I spread the ones I had before him.

“You didn’t make this one,” he said as he picked up my knife. “This is not a blade of stone.”

“I did not make it. The man who owned it is dead. I can also fight and can tell you stories of the land to the west.”

His lip curled at that. “We know something of the west.”

“Do you know of the land beyond the Ridge, that wall of rock? Do you know of the plain beyond that? Do you know of the plateau where some men fell so far into evil ways that they would prey upon strangers inside shrines, on holy ground?”

Jerlan stared steadily at me. “Of such things we have not heard.”

“You will hear of them in time, and of more as well.” I let a silence pass to feed his curiosity, then said, “We can also find a way of making our horses useful to you. As you can see, they’re able to bear burdens too heavy for a man. I am told you live far from shrines and the Lady’s enclaves, but, with these horses, you can reach them more easily.”

“Traveling as we do tests our strength. Horses are only something else to feed, and they are wild and impart their wildness to men.”

“These horses are not wild.”

He shrugged. “There may be something in what you say, Arvil. We can talk of the horses later when the time for truthsaying is past.” He drew his brows together. “We’ll see how you hunt. As for the boy there, he may spend the days showing my charge Tulan what he knows of these horses. We’ll see what sort of men you are.’’

I was to hunt with Jerlan and five other men the next day. The air had grown warm again, and Birana had put off her sheepskin coat to wear the one I had made for her.

“Your form is hidden well enough,” I said.

She held out one hand. “Arvil, I’m afraid to stay here alone.”

“Tulan won’t harm you. Do as his guardian asked, and show him how to care for our horses and what their habits are. Say little to him—let him believe you are one of few words.”

I followed Jerlan and the others from the camp, but when we were outside the wall, they allowed me to lead. They told me nothing about the land or where game might be found, for it was my skill they wanted to see. Deer would avoid the ravaged land around the camp, and it came to me that, with so many men there, we might have to venture far to find game.

As we moved through the wood, I marked my position by the position of the sun overhead and also noted signs on the land—the faint marks of a trail, a glade to the south, the clumps of berry bushes near a thorny shrub. We had gone deep into the forest before I saw a place where deer had passed and where they had found forage among the plants. Still my companions said nothing as I followed these tracks.

We came to a pool fed by a creek, and there I waited, certain that deer would soon come to drink. The men were silent as they watched. When a buck at last appeared, I raised my bow and took aim, but only wounded the creature. My companions made no move to help me, and I marveled at the wealth of those who could give up this chance at more food only to test me.

I leaped up and ran after the bleeding deer, tracking it until I was close enough to hurl my spear. This weapon brought the buck down, and I was able to take its life. Jerlan and his men followed and sat down to watch as I cleared a place for a fire.

When the fire was ablaze, I began the work of butchering. It was night by the time my labor was done and a haunch was roasting over the fire. I sat down and waited for someone to speak to me.

“You might make a hunter,” Jerlan said. “You will share our meal now. We’ll sleep here and return to our camp in the morning.”

The roasted meat restored some of my strength. I was with a band once more and felt how much I had missed the company of other men. “It is not only hunting we want from you, but tales of your land,” Jerlan went on. “Tell us a story of it now, while we eat. Tell us your tale of the evil ones who would violate a shrine.”

The other men muttered at this. “Such men could not live,” one whispered as he made a sign against evil.

“Arvil told me that he knew of such men.”

“It is so,” I said. As I prepared to begin my story, I remembered what Shadow had told me about men preferring tales with some invention. In my words, the plateau became a place where an evil spirit dwelled and caused men to turn from the Lady, and I spoke of how the men there had seen that those who entered a shrine and expected peace within its walls could be easily robbed and slain. The Lady could not suffer such evil and sent Her weapons against these men, but the evil spirit among them was strong enough to protect a few from Her wrath. I spoke of two lone strangers who had come to a shrine, how the evil men had attacked them, and how the Lady, enraged by this desecration, had given Her strength to the travelers.

BOOK: The Shore of Women
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