The Skeptics Annotated Bible (249 page)

The Levite had a concubine that “played the whore against him” by returning to her father’s house.

19
And it came to pass in those days, when there was no king in Israel, that
there was a certain Levite sojourning on the side of mount Ephraim, who took to him a concubine
out of Beth-lehem-judah.

(19.1)
“There was a certain Levite sojourning on the side of mount Ephraim, who took to him a concubine.”

2
And his concubine played the whore against him, and went away from him unto her father’s house
to Beth-lehem-judah,
and was there four whole months
.

(19.2)
“And his concubine played the whore against him, and went away from him unto her father’s house … and was there four whole months.”

3 And
her husband arose, and went after her
, to speak friendly unto her, and to bring her again, having his servant with him, and a couple of asses: and she brought him into her father’s house: and when the father of the damsel saw him, he rejoiced to meet him.

(19.3)
“Her husband arose, and went after her.”

4 And his father in law, the damsel’s father, retained him; and he abode with him three days: so they did eat and drink, and lodged there.

5 And it came to pass on the fourth day, when they arose early in the morning, that he rose up to depart: and the damsel’s father said unto his son in law, Comfort thine heart with a morsel of bread, and afterward go your way.

6 And they sat down, and did eat and drink both of them together: for the damsel’s father had said unto the man, Be content, I pray thee, and tarry all night, and let thine heart be merry.

7 And when the man rose up to depart, his father in law urged him: therefore he lodged there again.

8 And he arose early in the morning on the fifth day to depart: and the damsel’s father said, Comfort thine heart, I pray thee. And they tarried until afternoon, and they did eat both of them.

9 And when the man rose up to depart, he, and his concubine, and his servant, his father in law, the damsel’s father, said unto him, Behold, now the day draweth toward evening, I pray you tarry all night: behold, the day groweth to an end, lodge here, that thine heart may be merry; and to morrow get you early on your way, that thou mayest go home.

10 But
the man
would not tarry that night, but he
rose up and departed, and came over against Jebus
, which is Jerusalem; and there were with him two asses saddled
, his concubine also was with him.

(19.10) “The man … rose up and departed, and came over against Jebus … his concubine also was with him.” (Yes, Homer, Jebus is in the Bible!)

11 And when they were by Jebus, the day was far spent; and the servant said unto his master, Come, I pray thee, and let us turn in into this city of the Jebusites, and lodge in it.

12 And his master said unto him, We will not turn aside hither into the city of a stranger, that is not of the children of Israel; we will pass over to Gibeah.

13 And he said unto his servant, Come, and let us draw near to one of these places to lodge all night, in Gibeah, or in Ramah.

14 And they passed on and went their way; and
the sun went down upon them when they were by Gibeah, which belongeth to Benjamin.

(19.14) “The sun went down upon them when they were by Gibeah, which belongeth to Benjamin.”

15 And they turned aside thither, to go in and to lodge in Gibeah: and when he went in, he sat him down in a street of the city: for there was no man that took them into his house to lodging.

16 And, behold, there came an old man from his work out of the field at even, which was also of mount Ephraim; and he sojourned in Gibeah: but the men of the place were Benjamites.

17 And when he had lifted up his eyes, he saw a wayfaring man in the street of the city: and the old man said, Whither goest thou? and whence comest thou?

18 And he said unto him, We are passing from Beth-lehem-judah toward the side of mount Ephraim; from thence am I: and I went to Beth-lehem-judah, but I am now going to the house of the LORD; and there is no man that receiveth me to house.

19 Yet there is both straw and provender for our asses; and there is bread and wine also for me, and for thy handmaid, and for the young man which is with thy servants: there is no want of any thing.

20 And
the old man
said, Peace be with thee; howsoever let all thy wants lie upon me; only lodge not in the street.

21 So he
brought him into his house
, and gave provender unto the asses:
and they washed their feet, and did eat and drink.

(19.20-21)
“The old man … brought him into his house … and they washed their feet, and did eat and drink.”

(19.22-30) After taking in the traveling Levite, the host offers his virgin daughter and his guest’s concubine to a mob of perverts (who want to have sex with his guest). The mob refuses the daughter, but accepts the concubine and they “abuse her all night.” The next morning she crawls back to the doorstep. The Levite puts her body on an ass and takes it home. Then he chops the body up into twelve pieces (while still alive?) and sends them to each of the twelve tribes of Israel (Parcel Post?). The story, which must be one of the most disgusting stories ever told, ends with: “consider of it, take advice, and speak your mind.” Those who do consider it will immediately reject the idea that the Bible is inspired by God. Hopefully, they then will speak their mind.

22
Now as they were making their hearts merry, behold, the men of the city
, certain sons of Belial, beset the house round about, and
beat at the door, and spake to the master of the house
, the old man,
saying, Bring forth the man that came into thine house, that we may know him.

(19.22)
“Now as they were making their hearts merry, behold, the men of the city … beat at the door, and spake to the master of the house … saying, Bring forth the man that came into thine house, that we may know him.”

23 And the man, the master of the house, went out unto them, and said unto them, Nay, my brethren, nay, I pray you, do not so wickedly; seeing that this man is come into mine house, do not this folly.

(19.23)
“The man … said unto them, Nay, my brethren, nay, I pray you, do not so wickedly; seeing that this man is come into mine house, do not this folly.”

24 Behold,
here is my daughter a maiden, and his concubine; them I will bring out now, and humble ye them, and do with them what seemeth good unto you: but unto this man do not so vile a thing.

(19.24)
“Here is my daughter a maiden, and his concubine; them I will bring out now, and humble ye them, and do with them what seemeth good unto you: but unto this man do not so vile a thing.”

25
But the men would not hearken to him: so the man took his concubine, and brought her forth unto them; and they knew her, and abused her all the night until the morning
: and when the day began to spring, they let her go.

(19.25)
“But the men would not hearken to him: so the man took his concubine, and brought her forth unto them; and they knew her, and abused her all the night until the morning.”